The Constantinople Divann is greatly used by the foring gents of Lester Squar. I never ad the good fortn to pass down Pipping’s Buildings without seeing a haf a duzen of ’em on the threshole of the extablishment, giving the street an oppertunity of testing the odar of the Misses Mordeky’s prime Avannas. Two or three mor may be visable inside, settn on the counter or the chestis, indulging in their fav’rit whead, the rich and spisy Pickwhick, the ripe Manilly, or the flagrant and arheumatic Qby.
“These Divanns are, as is very well known, the knightly4 resott of the young Henglish nobillaty. It is ear a young Pier5, after an arjus day at the House of Commons, solazes himself with a glas of gin-and-water (the national beveridge), with cheerful conversation on the ewents of the day, or with an armless gaym of baggytell in the back-parlor.”
So wrote at least our friend Jools to his newspaper, the Horriflam; and of this back-parlor and baggytell-bord, of this counter, of this “Constantinople” Divan, he became almost as reglar a frequenter as the plaster of Parish Turk who sits smoking a hookey between the two blue coffee-cups in the winder.
I have oftin, smokin my own shroot in silents in a corner of the Diwann, listened to Jools and his friends inwaying aginst Hingland, and boastin of their own immortial country. How they did go on about Wellintun, and what an arty contamp they ad for him! — how they used to prove that France was the Light, the Scenter-pint, the Igsample and hadmiration of the whole world! And though I scarcely take a French paper now-a-days (I lived in early days as groom6 in a French famly three years, and therefore knows the languidg), though, I say, you can’t take up Jools’s paper, the Orriflam, without readin that a minister has committed bribery7 and perjury8, or that a littery man has committed perjury and murder, or that a Duke has stabbed his wife in fifty places, or some story equally horrible; yet for all that it’s admiral to see how the French gents will swagger — how they will be the scenters of civilization — how they will be the Igsamples of Europ, and nothink shall prevent ’em — knowing they will have it, I say I listen, smokin my pip in silence. But to our tail.
Reglar every evening there came to the “Constantanople” a young gent etired in the igth of fashn; and indead presenting by the cleanlyness of his appearants and linning (which was generally a pink or blew shurt, with a cricketer or a dansuse pattern) rather a contrast to the dinjy and whistkcard sosaity of the Diwann. As for wiskars, this young mann had none beyond a little yallow tought to his chin, which you woodn notas, only he was always pulling at it. His statue was diminnative, but his coschume supubb, for he had the tippiest Jane boots, the ivoryheadest canes9, the most gawjus scarlick Jonville ties, and the most Scotch-plaidest trowseys, of any customer of that establishment. He was univusaly called Milord.
“Que est ce jeune seigneur? Who is this young hurl10 who comes knightly to the ‘Constantanople,’ who is so proddigl of his gold (for indeed the young gent would frequinly propoase gininwater to the company), and who drinks so much gin?” asked Munseer Chacabac of a friend from the “Hotel de l’Ail.”
“His name is Lord Yardham,” answered that friend. “He never comes here but at night — and why?”
“Y?” igsclaimed Jools, istonisht.
“Why? because he is engaygd all day — and do you know where he is engaygd all day?”
“Where?” asked Jools.
“At the Foring Office — NOW do you begin to understand?”— Jools trembled.
He speaks of his uncle, the head of that office. —“Who IS the head of that offis? — Palmerston.”
“The nephew of Palmerston!” said Jools, almost in a fit.
“Lor Yardham pretends not to speak French,” the other went on. “He pretends he can only say wee and commong porty voo. Shallow humbug11! — I have marked him during our conversations. — When we have spoken of the glory of France among the nations, I have seen his eye kindle12, and his perfidious13 lip curl with rage. When they have discussed before him, the Imprudents! the affairs of Europe, and Raggybritchovich has shown us the next Circassian Campaign, or Sapousne has laid hare the plan of the Calabrian patriots14 for the next insurrection, I have marked this stranger — this Lor Yardham. He smokes, ’tis to conceal15 his countenance16; he drinks gin, ’tis to hide his face in the goblet17. And be sure, he carries every word of our conversation to the perfidious Palmerston, his uncle.”
“I will beard him in his den,” thought Jools. “I will meet him corps-a-corps — the tyrant18 of Europe shall suffer through his nephew, and I will shoot him as dead as Dujarrier.”
When Lor Yardham came to the “Constantanople” that night, Jools i’d him savidgely from edd to foot, while Lord Yardham replied the same. It wasn’t much for either to do — neyther being more than 4 foot ten hi — Jools was a grannydear in his company of the Nashnal Gard, and was as brayv as a lion.
“Ah, l’Angleterre, l’Angleterre, tu nous dois une revanche,” said Jools, crossing his arms and grinding his teeth at Lord Yardham.
“Wee,” said Lord Yardham; “wee.”
“Delenda est Carthago!” howled out Jools.
“Oh, wee,” said the Erl of Yardham, and at the same moment his glas of ginawater coming in, he took a drink, saying, “A voternsanty, Munseer:” and then he offered it like a man of fashn to Jools.
A light broak on Jools’s mind as he igsepted the refreshmint. “Sapoase,” he said, “instedd of slaughtering19 this nephew of the infamous20 Palmerston, I extract his secrets from him; suppose I pump him — suppose I unveil his schemes and send them to my paper? La France may hear the name of Jools de Chacabac, and the star of honor may glitter on my bosom21.”
So axepting Lord Yardham’s cortasy, he returned it by ordering another glass of gin at his own expence, and they both drank it on the counter, where Jools talked of the affaers of Europ all night. To everything he said, the Earl of Yardham answered, “Wee, wee;” except at the end of the evening, when he squeeged his & and said, “Bong swore.”
“There’s nothing like goin amongst ’em to equire the reel pronounciation,” his lordship said, as he let himself into his lodgings22 with his latch-key. “That was a very eloquent23 young gent at the ‘Constantinople,’ and I’ll patronize him.”
“Ah, perfide, je te demasquerai!” Jools remarked to himself as he went to bed in his “Hotel de l’Ail.” And they met the next night, and from that heavning the young men were continyually together.
Well, one day, as they were walking in the Quadrant, Jools talking, and Lord Yardham saying, “Wee, wee,” they were struck all of a heap by seeing —
But my paper is igshosted, and I must dixcribe what they sor in the nex number.
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收听单词发音
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1
ornament
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| v.装饰，美化；n.装饰，装饰物 | |
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2
lobsters
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| 龙虾( lobster的名词复数 )； 龙虾肉 | |
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3
divan
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| n.长沙发；（波斯或其他东方诗人的）诗集 | |
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4
knightly
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| adj. 骑士般的 adv. 骑士般地 | |
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5
pier
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| n.码头；桥墩，桥柱；[建]窗间壁，支柱 | |
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6
groom
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| vt.给（马、狗等）梳毛，照料，使...整洁 | |
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7
bribery
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| n.贿络行为，行贿，受贿 | |
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8
perjury
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| n.伪证；伪证罪 | |
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9
canes
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| n.（某些植物，如竹或甘蔗的）茎( cane的名词复数 )；（用于制作家具等的）竹竿；竹杖 | |
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10
hurl
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| vt.猛投，力掷，声叫骂 | |
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11
humbug
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| n.花招，谎话，欺骗 | |
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12
kindle
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| v.点燃，着火 | |
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13
perfidious
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| adj.不忠的，背信弃义的 | |
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14
patriots
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| 爱国者，爱国主义者( patriot的名词复数 ) | |
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15
conceal
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| v.隐藏，隐瞒，隐蔽 | |
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16
countenance
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| n.脸色，面容；面部表情；vt.支持，赞同 | |
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17
goblet
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| n.高脚酒杯 | |
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18
tyrant
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| n.暴君，专制的君主，残暴的人 | |
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19
slaughtering
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| v.屠杀，杀戮，屠宰( slaughter的现在分词 ) | |
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20
infamous
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| adj.声名狼藉的，臭名昭著的，邪恶的 | |
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21
bosom
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| n.胸，胸部；胸怀；内心；adj.亲密的 | |
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22
lodgings
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| n. 出租的房舍, 寄宿舍 | |
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23
eloquent
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| adj.雄辩的，口才流利的；明白显示出的 | |
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