He so felt the blow indeed, so gasped5, before what had happened to him, at the ugliness, the bitterness, and, beyond these things, the sinister6 strangeness, that, the matter of his dismay little by little detaching and projecting itself, settling there face to face with him as something he must now live with always, he might have been in charge of some horrid7 alien thing, some violent, scared, unhappy creature whom there was small joy, of a truth, in remaining with, but whose behaviour wouldn’t perhaps bring him under notice, nor otherwise compromise him, so long as he should stay to watch it. A young jibbering ape of one of the more formidable sorts, or an ominous8 infant panther, smuggled9 into the great gaudy10 hotel and whom it might yet be important he shouldn’t advertise, couldn’t have affected11 him as needing more domestic attention. The great gaudy hotel — The Pocahontas, but carried out largely on “Du Barry” lines — made all about him, beside, behind, below, above, in blocks and tiers and superpositions, a sufficient defensive12 hugeness; so that, between the massive labyrinth13 and the New York weather, life in a lighthouse during a gale14 would scarce have kept him more apart. Even when in the course of that worse Thursday it had occurred to him for vague relief that the odious15 certified16 facts couldn’t be all his misery17, and that, with his throat and a probable temperature, a brush of the epidemic18, which was for ever brushing him, accounted for something, even then he couldn’t resign himself to bed and broth19 and dimness, but only circled and prowled the more within his high cage, only watched the more from his tenth story the rage of the elements.
In the afternoon he had a doctor — the caravanserai, which supplied everything in quantities, had one for each group of so many rooms — just in order to be assured that he was gripp?? enough for anything. What his visitor, making light of his attack, perversely20 told him was that he was, much rather, “blue” enough, and from causes doubtless known to himself — which didn’t come to the same thing; but he “gave him something,” prescribed him warmth and quiet and broth and courage, and came back the next day as to readminister this last dose. He then pronounced him better, and on Saturday pronounced him well — all the more that the storm had abated21 and the snow had been dealt with as New York, at a push, knew how to deal with things. Oh, how New York knew how to deal — to deal, that is, with other accumulations lying passive to its hand — was exactly what Mark now ached with his impression of; so that, still threshing about in this consciousness, he had on the Saturday come near to breaking out as to what was the matter with him. The Doctor brought in somehow the air of the hotel — which, cheerfully and conscientiously22, by his simple philosophy, the good man wished to diffuse23; breathing forth24 all the echoes of other woes25 and worries and pointing the honest moral that, especially with such a thermometer, there were enough of these to go round.
Our sufferer, by that time, would have liked to tell some one; extracting, to the last acid strain of it, the full strength of his sorrow, taking it all in as he could only do by himself and with the conditions favourable26 at least to this, had been his natural first need. But now, he supposed, he must be better; there was something of his heart’s heaviness he wanted so to give out. He had rummaged27 forth on the Thursday night half a dozen old photographs stuck into a leather frame, a small show-case that formed part of his usual equipage of travel — he mostly set it up on a table when he stayed anywhere long enough; and in one of the neat gilt-edged squares of this convenient portable array, as familiar as his shaving-glass or the hair-brushes, of backs and monograms28 now so beautifully toned and wasted, long ago given him by his mother, Phil Blood-good handsomely faced him. Not contemporaneous, and a little faded, but so saying what it said only the more dreadfully, the image seemed to sit there, at an immemorial window, like some long effective and only at last exposed “decoy” of fate. It was because he was so beautifully good-looking, because he was so charming and clever and frank — besides being one’s third cousin, or whatever it was, one’s early schoolfellow and one’s later college classmate — that one had abjectly29 trusted him. To live thus with his unremoved, undestroyed, engaging, treacherous30 face, had been, as our traveller desired, to live with all of the felt pang31; had been to consume it in such a single hot, sore mouthful as would so far as possible dispose of it and leave but cold dregs. Thus, if the Doctor, casting about for pleasantness, had happened to notice him there, salient since he was, and possibly by the same stroke even to know him, as New York — and more or less to its cost now, mightn’t one say? — so abundantly and agreeable had, the cup would have overflowed32 and Monteith, for all he could be sure of the contrary, would have relieved himself positively33 in tears.
“Oh he’s what’s the matter with me — that, looking after some of my poor dividends34, as he for the ten years of my absence had served me by doing, he has simply jockeyed me out of the whole little collection, such as it was, and taken the opportunity of my return, inevitably35 at last bewildered and uneasy, to ‘sail,’ ten days ago, for parts unknown and as yet unguessable. It isn’t the beastly values themselves, however; that’s only awkward and I can still live, though I don’t quite know how I shall turn round; it’s the horror of his having done it, and done it to me — without a mitigation or, so to speak, a warning or an excuse.” That, at a hint or a jog, is what he would have brought out — only to feel afterward36, no doubt, that he had wasted his impulse and profaned37 even a little his sincerity38. The Doctor didn’t in the event so much as glance at his cluster of portraits — which fact quite put before our friend the essentially39 more vivid range of imagery that a pair of eyes transferred from room to room and from one queer case to another, in such a place as that, would mainly be adjusted to. It wasn’t for him to relieve himself touchingly40, strikingly or whatever, to such a man: such a man might much more pertinently41 — save for professional discretion42 — have emptied out there his own bag of wonders; prodigies43 of observation, flowers of oddity, flowers of misery, flowers of the monstrous44, gathered in current hotel practice. Countless45 possibilities, making doctors perfunctory, Mark felt, swarmed46 and seethed47 at their doors; it showed for an incalculable world, and at last, on Sunday, he decided48 to leave his room.
点击收听单词发音
1 dismal | |
adj.阴沉的,凄凉的,令人忧郁的,差劲的 | |
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2 ebbed | |
(指潮水)退( ebb的过去式和过去分词 ); 落; 减少; 衰落 | |
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3 blizzard | |
n.暴风雪 | |
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4 savage | |
adj.野蛮的;凶恶的,残暴的;n.未开化的人 | |
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5 gasped | |
v.喘气( gasp的过去式和过去分词 );喘息;倒抽气;很想要 | |
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6 sinister | |
adj.不吉利的,凶恶的,左边的 | |
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7 horrid | |
adj.可怕的;令人惊恐的;恐怖的;极讨厌的 | |
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8 ominous | |
adj.不祥的,不吉的,预兆的,预示的 | |
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9 smuggled | |
水货 | |
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10 gaudy | |
adj.华而不实的;俗丽的 | |
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11 affected | |
adj.不自然的,假装的 | |
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12 defensive | |
adj.防御的;防卫的;防守的 | |
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13 labyrinth | |
n.迷宫;难解的事物;迷路 | |
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14 gale | |
n.大风,强风,一阵闹声(尤指笑声等) | |
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15 odious | |
adj.可憎的,讨厌的 | |
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16 certified | |
a.经证明合格的;具有证明文件的 | |
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17 misery | |
n.痛苦,苦恼,苦难;悲惨的境遇,贫苦 | |
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18 epidemic | |
n.流行病;盛行;adj.流行性的,流传极广的 | |
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19 broth | |
n.原(汁)汤(鱼汤、肉汤、菜汤等) | |
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20 perversely | |
adv. 倔强地 | |
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21 abated | |
减少( abate的过去式和过去分词 ); 减去; 降价; 撤消(诉讼) | |
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22 conscientiously | |
adv.凭良心地;认真地,负责尽职地;老老实实 | |
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23 diffuse | |
v.扩散;传播;adj.冗长的;四散的,弥漫的 | |
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24 forth | |
adv.向前;向外,往外 | |
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25 woes | |
困境( woe的名词复数 ); 悲伤; 我好苦哇; 某人就要倒霉 | |
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26 favourable | |
adj.赞成的,称赞的,有利的,良好的,顺利的 | |
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27 rummaged | |
翻找,搜寻( rummage的过去式和过去分词 ); 已经海关检查 | |
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28 monograms | |
n.字母组合( monogram的名词复数 ) | |
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29 abjectly | |
凄惨地; 绝望地; 糟透地; 悲惨地 | |
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30 treacherous | |
adj.不可靠的,有暗藏的危险的;adj.背叛的,背信弃义的 | |
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31 pang | |
n.剧痛,悲痛,苦闷 | |
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32 overflowed | |
溢出的 | |
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33 positively | |
adv.明确地,断然,坚决地;实在,确实 | |
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34 dividends | |
红利( dividend的名词复数 ); 股息; 被除数; (足球彩票的)彩金 | |
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35 inevitably | |
adv.不可避免地;必然发生地 | |
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36 afterward | |
adv.后来;以后 | |
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37 profaned | |
v.不敬( profane的过去式和过去分词 );亵渎,玷污 | |
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38 sincerity | |
n.真诚,诚意;真实 | |
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39 essentially | |
adv.本质上,实质上,基本上 | |
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40 touchingly | |
adv.令人同情地,感人地,动人地 | |
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41 pertinently | |
适切地 | |
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42 discretion | |
n.谨慎;随意处理 | |
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43 prodigies | |
n.奇才,天才(尤指神童)( prodigy的名词复数 ) | |
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44 monstrous | |
adj.巨大的;恐怖的;可耻的,丢脸的 | |
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45 countless | |
adj.无数的,多得不计其数的 | |
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46 swarmed | |
密集( swarm的过去式和过去分词 ); 云集; 成群地移动; 蜜蜂或其他飞行昆虫成群地飞来飞去 | |
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47 seethed | |
(液体)沸腾( seethe的过去式和过去分词 ); 激动,大怒; 强压怒火; 生闷气(~with sth|~ at sth) | |
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48 decided | |
adj.决定了的,坚决的;明显的,明确的 | |
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