I am also happy that fate has flung me into so blessed an age for the mutual15 felicity of booksellers and authors, whom I may safely affirm to be at this day the two only satisfied parties in England. Ask an author how his last piece has succeeded, “Why, truly he thanks his stars the world has been very favourable16, and he has not the least reason to complain.” And yet he wrote it in a week at bits and starts, when he could steal an hour from his urgent affairs, as it is a hundred to one you may see further in the preface, to which he refers you, and for the rest to the bookseller. There you go as a customer, and make the same question, “He blesses his God the thing takes wonderful; he is just printing a second edition, and has but three left in his shop.” “You beat down the price; sir, we shall not differ,” and in hopes of your custom another time, lets you have it as reasonable as you please; “And pray send as many of your acquaintance as you will; I shall upon your account furnish them all at the same rate.”
Now it is not well enough considered to what accidents and occasions the world is indebted for the greatest part of those noble writings which hourly start up to entertain it. If it were not for a rainy day, a drunken vigil, a fit of the spleen, a course of physic, a sleepy Sunday, an ill run at dice17, a long tailor’s bill, a beggar’s purse, a factious18 head, a hot sun, costive diet, want of books, and a just contempt of learning — but for these events, I say, and some others too long to recite (especially a prudent19 neglect of taking brimstone inwardly), I doubt the number of authors and of writings would dwindle20 away to a degree most woeful to behold21. To confirm this opinion, hear the words of the famous troglodyte22 philosopher. “It is certain,” said he, “some grains of folly23 are of course annexed24 as part in the composition of human nature; only the choice is left us whether we please to wear them inlaid or embossed, and we need not go very far to seek how that is usually determined25, when we remember it is with human faculties26 as with liquors, the lightest will be ever at the top.”
There is in this famous island of Britain a certain paltry27 scribbler, very voluminous, whose character the reader cannot wholly be a stranger to. He deals in a pernicious kind of writings called “Second Parts,” and usually passes under the name of “The Author of the First.” I easily foresee that as soon as I lay down my pen this nimble operator will have stole it, and treat me as inhumanly28 as he has already done Dr. Blackmore, Lestrange, and many others who shall here be nameless. I therefore fly for justice and relief into the hands of that great rectifier of saddles and lover of mankind, Dr. Bentley, begging he will take this enormous grievance29 into his most modern consideration; and if it should so happen that the furniture of an ass1 in the shape of a second part must for my sins be clapped, by mistake, upon my back, that he will immediately please, in the presence of the world, to lighten me of the burthen, and take it home to his own house till the true beast thinks fit to call for it.
In the meantime, I do here give this public notice that my resolutions are to circumscribe30 within this discourse31 the whole stock of matter I have been so many years providing. Since my vein32 is once opened, I am content to exhaust it all at a running, for the peculiar33 advantage of my dear country, and for the universal benefit of mankind. Therefore, hospitably34 considering the number of my guests, they shall have my whole entertainment at a meal, and I scorn to set up the leavings in the cupboard. What the guests cannot eat may be given to the poor, and the dogs under the table may gnaw35 the bones 68. This I understand for a more generous proceeding36 than to turn the company’s stomachs by inviting37 them again to-morrow to a scurvy38 meal of scraps39.
If the reader fairly considers the strength of what I have advanced in the foregoing section, I am convinced it will produce a wonderful revolution in his notions and opinions, and he will be abundantly better prepared to receive and to relish40 the concluding part of this miraculous41 treatise. Readers may be divided into three classes — the superficial, the ignorant, and the learned, and I have with much felicity fitted my pen to the genius and advantage of each. The superficial reader will be strangely provoked to laughter, which clears the breast and the lungs, is sovereign against the spleen, and the most innocent of all diuretics. The ignorant reader (between whom and the former the distinction is extremely nice) will find himself disposed to stare, which is an admirable remedy for ill eyes, serves to raise and enliven the spirits, and wonderfully helps perspiration42. But the reader truly learned, chiefly for whose benefit I wake when others sleep, and sleep when others wake, will here find sufficient matter to employ his speculations43 for the rest of his life. It were much to be wished, and I do here humbly44 propose for an experiment, that every prince in Christendom will take seven of the deepest scholars in his dominions45 and shut them up close for seven years in seven chambers46, with a command to write seven ample commentaries on this comprehensive discourse. I shall venture to affirm that, whatever difference may be found in their several conjectures47, they will be all, without the least distortion, manifestly deducible from the text. Meantime it is my earnest request that so useful an undertaking48 may be entered upon (if their Majesties49 please) with all convenient speed, because I have a strong inclination50 before I leave the world to taste a blessing51 which we mysterious writers can seldom reach till we have got into our graves, whether it is that fame being a fruit grafted52 on the body, can hardly grow and much less ripen53 till the stock is in the earth, or whether she be a bird of prey54, and is lured55 among the rest to pursue after the scent56 of a carcass, or whether she conceives her trumpet57 sounds best and farthest when she stands on a tomb, by the advantage of a rising ground and the echo of a hollow vault58.
It is true, indeed, the republic of dark authors, after they once found out this excellent expedient59 of dying, have been peculiarly happy in the variety as well as extent of their reputation. For night being the universal mother of things, wise philosophers hold all writings to be fruitful in the proportion they are dark, and therefore the true illuminated60 (that is to say, the darkest of all) have met with such numberless commentators61, whose scholiastic midwifery hath delivered them of meanings that the authors themselves perhaps never conceived, and yet may very justly be allowed the lawful62 parents of them, the words of such writers being like seed, which, however scattered63 at random64, when they light upon a fruitful ground, will multiply far beyond either the hopes or imagination of the sower.
And therefore, in order to promote so useful a work, I will here take leave to glance a few innuendos65 that may be of great assistance to those sublime66 spirits who shall be appointed to labour in a universal comment upon this wonderful discourse. And first, I have couched a very profound mystery in the number of 0’s multiplied by seven and divided by nine. Also, if a devout67 brother of the Rosy68 Cross will pray fervently69 for sixty-three mornings with a lively faith, and then transpose certain letters and syllables70 according to prescription71, in the second and fifth section they will certainly reveal into a full receipt of the opus magnum. Lastly, whoever will be at the pains to calculate the whole number of each letter in this treatise, and sum up the difference exactly between the several numbers, assigning the true natural cause for every such difference, the discoveries in the product will plentifully72 reward his labour. But then he must beware of Bythus and Sige, and be sure not to forget the qualities of Acamoth; a cujus lacrymis humecta prodit substantia, a risu lucida, a tristitia solida, et a timore mobilis, wherein Eugenius Philalethes 69 hath committed an unpardonable mistake.
点击收听单词发音
1 ass | |
n.驴;傻瓜,蠢笨的人 | |
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2 deference | |
n.尊重,顺从;敬意 | |
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3 humble | |
adj.谦卑的,恭顺的;地位低下的;v.降低,贬低 | |
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4 majesty | |
n.雄伟,壮丽,庄严,威严;最高权威,王权 | |
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5 honourable | |
adj.可敬的;荣誉的,光荣的 | |
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6 privy | |
adj.私用的;隐密的 | |
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7 clergy | |
n.[总称]牧师,神职人员 | |
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8 gentry | |
n.绅士阶级,上层阶级 | |
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9 worthy | |
adj.(of)值得的,配得上的;有价值的 | |
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10 whatsoever | |
adv.(用于否定句中以加强语气)任何;pron.无论什么 | |
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11 generosity | |
n.大度,慷慨,慷慨的行为 | |
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12 treatise | |
n.专著;(专题)论文 | |
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13 approbation | |
n.称赞;认可 | |
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14 gratitude | |
adj.感激,感谢 | |
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15 mutual | |
adj.相互的,彼此的;共同的,共有的 | |
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16 favourable | |
adj.赞成的,称赞的,有利的,良好的,顺利的 | |
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17 dice | |
n.骰子;vt.把(食物)切成小方块,冒险 | |
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18 factious | |
adj.好搞宗派活动的,派系的,好争论的 | |
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19 prudent | |
adj.谨慎的,有远见的,精打细算的 | |
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20 dwindle | |
v.逐渐变小(或减少) | |
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21 behold | |
v.看,注视,看到 | |
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22 troglodyte | |
n.古代穴居者;井底之蛙 | |
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23 folly | |
n.愚笨,愚蠢,蠢事,蠢行,傻话 | |
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24 annexed | |
[法] 附加的,附属的 | |
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25 determined | |
adj.坚定的;有决心的 | |
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26 faculties | |
n.能力( faculty的名词复数 );全体教职员;技巧;院 | |
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27 paltry | |
adj.无价值的,微不足道的 | |
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28 inhumanly | |
adv.无人情味地,残忍地 | |
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29 grievance | |
n.怨愤,气恼,委屈 | |
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30 circumscribe | |
v.在...周围划线,限制,约束 | |
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31 discourse | |
n.论文,演说;谈话;话语;vi.讲述,著述 | |
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32 vein | |
n.血管,静脉;叶脉,纹理;情绪;vt.使成脉络 | |
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33 peculiar | |
adj.古怪的,异常的;特殊的,特有的 | |
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34 hospitably | |
亲切地,招待周到地,善于款待地 | |
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35 gnaw | |
v.不断地啃、咬;使苦恼,折磨 | |
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36 proceeding | |
n.行动,进行,(pl.)会议录,学报 | |
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37 inviting | |
adj.诱人的,引人注目的 | |
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38 scurvy | |
adj.下流的,卑鄙的,无礼的;n.坏血病 | |
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39 scraps | |
油渣 | |
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40 relish | |
n.滋味,享受,爱好,调味品;vt.加调味料,享受,品味;vi.有滋味 | |
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41 miraculous | |
adj.像奇迹一样的,不可思议的 | |
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42 perspiration | |
n.汗水;出汗 | |
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43 speculations | |
n.投机买卖( speculation的名词复数 );思考;投机活动;推断 | |
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44 humbly | |
adv. 恭顺地,谦卑地 | |
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45 dominions | |
统治权( dominion的名词复数 ); 领土; 疆土; 版图 | |
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46 chambers | |
n.房间( chamber的名词复数 );(议会的)议院;卧室;会议厅 | |
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47 conjectures | |
推测,猜想( conjecture的名词复数 ) | |
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48 undertaking | |
n.保证,许诺,事业 | |
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49 majesties | |
n.雄伟( majesty的名词复数 );庄严;陛下;王权 | |
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50 inclination | |
n.倾斜;点头;弯腰;斜坡;倾度;倾向;爱好 | |
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51 blessing | |
n.祈神赐福;祷告;祝福,祝愿 | |
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52 grafted | |
移植( graft的过去式和过去分词 ); 嫁接; 使(思想、制度等)成为(…的一部份); 植根 | |
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53 ripen | |
vt.使成熟;vi.成熟 | |
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54 prey | |
n.被掠食者,牺牲者,掠食;v.捕食,掠夺,折磨 | |
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55 lured | |
吸引,引诱(lure的过去式与过去分词形式) | |
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56 scent | |
n.气味,香味,香水,线索,嗅觉;v.嗅,发觉 | |
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57 trumpet | |
n.喇叭,喇叭声;v.吹喇叭,吹嘘 | |
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58 vault | |
n.拱形圆顶,地窖,地下室 | |
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59 expedient | |
adj.有用的,有利的;n.紧急的办法,权宜之计 | |
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60 illuminated | |
adj.被照明的;受启迪的 | |
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61 commentators | |
n.评论员( commentator的名词复数 );时事评论员;注释者;实况广播员 | |
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62 lawful | |
adj.法律许可的,守法的,合法的 | |
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63 scattered | |
adj.分散的,稀疏的;散步的;疏疏落落的 | |
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64 random | |
adj.随机的;任意的;n.偶然的(或随便的)行动 | |
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65 innuendos | |
n.影射的话( innuendo的名词复数 );讽刺的话;含沙射影;暗讽 | |
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66 sublime | |
adj.崇高的,伟大的;极度的,不顾后果的 | |
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67 devout | |
adj.虔诚的,虔敬的,衷心的 (n.devoutness) | |
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68 rosy | |
adj.美好的,乐观的,玫瑰色的 | |
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69 fervently | |
adv.热烈地,热情地,强烈地 | |
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70 syllables | |
n.音节( syllable的名词复数 ) | |
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71 prescription | |
n.处方,开药;指示,规定 | |
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72 plentifully | |
adv. 许多地,丰饶地 | |
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