O, ye immortal Gods! nothing so difficult as to begin a chapter, and therefore have we flown to you. In literature, as in life, it is the first step; you know the rest. After a paragraph or so our blood Is up, and even our jaded11 hackneys scud12 along, and warm up into friskiness13.
The Duke awoke: another day of his eventful life is now to run its course. He found that the Bird of Paradise had not returned from an excursion to a neighbouring park: he left a note for her, apprising14 her of his departure to London, and he despatched an affectionate letter to Lady Aphrodite, which was the least that he could do, considering that he perhaps quitted Brighton the day of her arrival. And having done all this, he ordered his horses, and before noon was on his first stage.
It was his birthday. He had completed his twenty-third year. This was sufficient, even if he had no other inducement, to make him indulge in some slight reflection. These annual summings up are awkward things, even to the prosperous and the happy, but to those who are the reverse, who are discontented with themselves, and find that youth melting away which they believe can alone achieve anything, I think a birthday is about the most gloomy four-and-twenty hours that ever flap their damp dull wings over melancholy16 man.
Yet the Duke of St. James was rather thoughtful than melancholy. His life had been too active of late to allow him to indulge much in that passive mood. ‘I may never know what happiness is,’ thought his Grace, as he leaned back in his whirling britzska, ‘but I think I know what happiness is not. It is not the career which I have hitherto pursued. All this excitement which they talk of so much wears out the mind, and, I begin to believe, even the body, for certainly my energies seem deserting me. But two years, two miserable17 years, four-and-twenty months, eight-and-forty times the hours, the few hours, that I have been worse than wasting here, and I am shipwrecked, fairly bulged18. Yet I have done everything, tried everything, and my career has been an eminent19 career. Woe20 to the wretch21 who trusts to his pampered22 senses for felicity! Woe to the wretch who flies from the bright goddess Sympathy, to sacrifice before the dark idol23 Self-love! Ah! I see too late, we were made for each other. Too late, I discover the beautiful results of this great principle of creation. Oh! the blunders of an unformed character! Oh! the torture of an ill-regulated mind!
‘Give me a life with no fierce alternations of rapture24 and anguish25, no impossible hopes, no mad depression. Free me from the delusions26 which succeed each other like scentless28 roses, that are ever blooming. Save me from the excitement which brings exhaustion29, and from the passion that procreates remorse30. Give me the luminous31 mind, where recognised and paramount32 duty dispels33 the harassing34, ascertains35 the doubtful, confirms the wavering, sweetens the bitter. Give me content. Oh! give me love!
‘How is it to end? What is to become of me? Can nothing rescue me? Is there no mode of relief, no place of succour, no quarter of refuge, no hope of salvation36? I cannot right myself, and there is an end of it. Society, society, society! I owe thee much; and perhaps in working in thy service, those feelings might be developed which I am now convinced are the only source of happiness; but I am plunged37 too deep in the quag. I have no impulse, no call. I know not how it is, but my energies, good and evil, seem alike vanishing. There stares that fellow at my carriage! God! willingly would I break the stones upon the road for a year, to clear my mind of all the past!’
A carriage dashed by, and a lady bowed. It was Mrs. Dallington Vere.
The Duke had appointed his banker to dine with him, as not a moment must be lost in preparing for the reception of his Brighton drafts. He was also to receive, this evening, a complete report of all his affairs. The first thing that struck his eye on his table was a packet from Sir Carte Blanche. He opened it eagerly, stared, started, nearly shrieked38. It fell from his hands. He was fortunately alone. The estimates for the completion of his works, and the purchase of the rest of the furniture, exactly equalled the sum already expended39. Sir Carte added, that the works might of course be stopped, but that there was no possible way of reducing them, with any deference40 to the original design, scale, and style; that he had already given instructions not to proceed with the furniture until further notice, but regretted to observe that the orders were so advanced that he feared it was too late to make any sensible reduction. It might in some degree reconcile his Grace to this report when he concluded by observing that the advanced state of the works could permit him to guarantee that the present estimates would not be exceeded.
The Duke had sufficiently41 recovered before the arrival of his confidential42 agent not to appear agitated43, only serious. The awful catastrophe44 at Brighton was announced, and his report of affairs was received. It was a very gloomy one. Great agricultural distress45 prevailed, and the rents could not be got in. Five-and-twenty per cent, was the least that must be taken off his income, and with no prospect46 of being speedily added on. There was a projected railroad which would entirely47 knock up his canal, and even if crushed must be expensively opposed. Coals were falling also, and the duties in town increasing. There was sad confusion in the Irish estates. The missionaries48, who were patronised on the neighbouring lands of one of the City Companies, had been exciting fatal confusion. Chapels49 were burnt, crops destroyed, stock butchered, and rents all in arrear50. Mr. Dacre had contrived51 with great prudence52 to repress the efforts of the new reformation, and had succeeded in preventing any great mischief53. His plans for the pursual of his ideas and feelings upon this subject had been communicated to his late ward15 in an urgent and important paper, which his Grace had never seen, but one day, unread, pushed into a certain black cabinet, which perhaps the reader may remember. His Grace’s miscellaneous debts had also been called in, and amounted to a greater sum than they had anticipated, which debts always do. One hundred and forty thousand pounds had crumbled54 away in the most imperceptible manner. A great slice of this was the portion of the jeweller. His shield and his vases would at least be evidence to his posterity55 of the splendour and the taste of their imprudent ancestor; but he observed the other items with less satisfaction. He discovered that in the course of two years he had given away one hundred and thirty-seven necklaces and bracelets56; and as for rings, they must be counted by the bushel. The result of this gloomy interview was, that the Duke had not only managed to get rid of the immortal half-million, but had incurred57 debts or engagements to the amount of nearly eight hundred thousand pounds, incumbrances which were to be borne by a decreased and perhaps decreasing income. His Grace was once more alone. ‘Well! my brain is not turned; and yet I think it has been pretty well worked these last few days. It cannot be true: it must all be a dream. He never could have dined here, and said all this. Have I, indeed, been at Brighton? No, no, no; I have been sleeping after dinner. I have a good mind to ring and ask whether he really was here. It must be one great delusion27. But no! there are those cursed accounts. Well! what does it signify? I was miserable before, and now I am only contemptible58 in addition. How the world will laugh! They were made forsooth for my diversion. O, idiot! you will be the butt59 of everyone! Talk of Bagshot, indeed! Why, he will scarcely speak to me!
‘Away with this! Let me turn these things in my mind. Take it at one hundred and fifty thousand. It is more, it must be more, but we will take it at that. Now, suppose one hundred thousand is allotted60 every year to meet my debts; I suppose, in nine or ten years I shall be free. Not that freedom will be worth much then; but still I am thinking of the glory of the House I have betrayed. Well, then, there is fifty thousand a-year left. Let me see; twenty thousand have always been spent in Ireland, and ten at Pen Bronnock, and they must not be cut down. The only thing I can do now is, not to spare myself. I am the cause, and let me meet the consequences. Well, then, perhaps twenty thousand a-year remain to keep Hauteville Castle and Hauteville House; to maintain the splendour of the Duke of St. James. Why, my hereditary61 charities alone amount to a quarter of my income, to say nothing of incidental charges: I too, who should and who would wish to rebuild, at my own cost, every bridge that is swept away, and every steeple that is burnt, in my county.
‘And now for the great point. Shall I proceed with my buildings? My own personal convenience whispers no! But I have a strong conviction that the advice is treasonable. What! the young Duke’s folly62 for every gazer in town and country to sneer63 at! Oh! my fathers, am I indeed your child, or am I bastard64? Never, never shall your shield be sullied while I bear it! Never shall your proud banner veil while I am chieftain! They shall be finished; certainly, they shall be finished, if I die an exile! There can be no doubt about this; I feel the deep propriety65.
‘This girl, too, something must be done for her. I must get Squib to run down to Brighton for me: and Afy, poor dear Afy, I think she will be sorry when she hears it all!
‘My head is weak: I want a counsellor. This man cannot enter into my feelings. Then there is my family lawyer; if I ask him for advice, he will ask me for instructions. Besides, this is not a matter of pounds, shillings, and pence; it is an affair as much of sentiment as economy; it involves the honour of my family, and I want one to unburden myself to, who can sympathise with the tortured feelings of a noble, of a Duke without a dukedom, for it has come to that. But I will leave sneers66 to the world.
‘There is Annesley. He is clever, but so coldblooded. He has no heart. There is Squib; he is a good fellow, and has heart enough; and I suppose, if I wanted to pension off a mistress, or compound with a few rascally67 tradesmen, he would manage the affair to a miracle. There is Darrell; but he will be so fussy68, and confidential, and official. Every meeting will be a cabinet council, every discussion a debate, every memorandum69 a state paper. There is Burlington; he is experienced, and clever, and kind-hearted, and, I really think, likes me; but, no, no, it is too ridiculous. We who have only met for enjoyment70, whose countenance71 was a smile, and whose conversation was badinage72; we to meet, and meditate73 on my broken fortunes! Impossible! Besides, what right have I to compel a man, the study of whose life is to banish74 care, to take all my anxieties on his back, or refuse the duty at the cost of my acquaintance and the trouble of his conscience. Ah! I once had a friend, the best, the wisest; but no more of that. What is even the loss of fortune and of consideration to the loss of his — his daughter’s love?’
His voice faltered75, yet it was long before he retired76; and he rose on the morrow only to meditate over his harassing embarrassments77. As if the cup of his misery78 were not o’erflowing, a new incident occurred about this time, which rendered his sense of them even keener. But this is important enough to commence a new chapter.
点击收听单词发音
1 immortal | |
adj.不朽的;永生的,不死的;神的 | |
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2 hover | |
vi.翱翔,盘旋;徘徊;彷徨,犹豫 | |
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3 flout | |
v./n.嘲弄,愚弄,轻视 | |
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4 oracles | |
神示所( oracle的名词复数 ); 神谕; 圣贤; 哲人 | |
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5 shrines | |
圣地,圣坛,神圣场所( shrine的名词复数 ) | |
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6 murmur | |
n.低语,低声的怨言;v.低语,低声而言 | |
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7 avenging | |
adj.报仇的,复仇的v.为…复仇,报…之仇( avenge的现在分词 );为…报复 | |
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8 twig | |
n.小树枝,嫩枝;v.理解 | |
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9 vindicates | |
n.澄清(某人/某事物)受到的责难或嫌疑( vindicate的名词复数 );表明或证明(所争辩的事物)属实、正当、有效等;维护v.澄清(某人/某事物)受到的责难或嫌疑( vindicate的第三人称单数 );表明或证明(所争辩的事物)属实、正当、有效等;维护 | |
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10 outraged | |
a.震惊的,义愤填膺的 | |
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11 jaded | |
adj.精疲力竭的;厌倦的;(因过饱或过多而)腻烦的;迟钝的 | |
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12 scud | |
n.疾行;v.疾行 | |
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13 friskiness | |
n.活泼,闹着玩 | |
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14 apprising | |
v.告知,通知( apprise的现在分词 );评价 | |
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15 ward | |
n.守卫,监护,病房,行政区,由监护人或法院保护的人(尤指儿童);vt.守护,躲开 | |
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16 melancholy | |
n.忧郁,愁思;adj.令人感伤(沮丧)的,忧郁的 | |
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17 miserable | |
adj.悲惨的,痛苦的;可怜的,糟糕的 | |
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18 bulged | |
凸出( bulge的过去式和过去分词 ); 充满; 塞满(某物) | |
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19 eminent | |
adj.显赫的,杰出的,有名的,优良的 | |
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20 woe | |
n.悲哀,苦痛,不幸,困难;int.用来表达悲伤或惊慌 | |
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21 wretch | |
n.可怜的人,不幸的人;卑鄙的人 | |
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22 pampered | |
adj.饮食过量的,饮食奢侈的v.纵容,宠,娇养( pamper的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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23 idol | |
n.偶像,红人,宠儿 | |
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24 rapture | |
n.狂喜;全神贯注;着迷;v.使狂喜 | |
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25 anguish | |
n.(尤指心灵上的)极度痛苦,烦恼 | |
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26 delusions | |
n.欺骗( delusion的名词复数 );谬见;错觉;妄想 | |
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27 delusion | |
n.谬见,欺骗,幻觉,迷惑 | |
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28 scentless | |
adj.无气味的,遗臭已消失的 | |
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29 exhaustion | |
n.耗尽枯竭,疲惫,筋疲力尽,竭尽,详尽无遗的论述 | |
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30 remorse | |
n.痛恨,悔恨,自责 | |
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31 luminous | |
adj.发光的,发亮的;光明的;明白易懂的;有启发的 | |
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32 paramount | |
a.最重要的,最高权力的 | |
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33 dispels | |
v.驱散,赶跑( dispel的第三人称单数 ) | |
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34 harassing | |
v.侵扰,骚扰( harass的现在分词 );不断攻击(敌人) | |
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35 ascertains | |
v.弄清,确定,查明( ascertain的第三人称单数 ) | |
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36 salvation | |
n.(尤指基督)救世,超度,拯救,解困 | |
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37 plunged | |
v.颠簸( plunge的过去式和过去分词 );暴跌;骤降;突降 | |
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38 shrieked | |
v.尖叫( shriek的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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39 expended | |
v.花费( expend的过去式和过去分词 );使用(钱等)做某事;用光;耗尽 | |
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40 deference | |
n.尊重,顺从;敬意 | |
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41 sufficiently | |
adv.足够地,充分地 | |
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42 confidential | |
adj.秘(机)密的,表示信任的,担任机密工作的 | |
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43 agitated | |
adj.被鼓动的,不安的 | |
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44 catastrophe | |
n.大灾难,大祸 | |
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45 distress | |
n.苦恼,痛苦,不舒适;不幸;vt.使悲痛 | |
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46 prospect | |
n.前景,前途;景色,视野 | |
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47 entirely | |
ad.全部地,完整地;完全地,彻底地 | |
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48 missionaries | |
n.传教士( missionary的名词复数 ) | |
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49 chapels | |
n.小教堂, (医院、监狱等的)附属礼拜堂( chapel的名词复数 );(在小教堂和附属礼拜堂举行的)礼拜仪式 | |
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50 arrear | |
n.欠款 | |
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51 contrived | |
adj.不自然的,做作的;虚构的 | |
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52 prudence | |
n.谨慎,精明,节俭 | |
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53 mischief | |
n.损害,伤害,危害;恶作剧,捣蛋,胡闹 | |
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54 crumbled | |
(把…)弄碎, (使)碎成细屑( crumble的过去式和过去分词 ); 衰落; 坍塌; 损坏 | |
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55 posterity | |
n.后裔,子孙,后代 | |
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56 bracelets | |
n.手镯,臂镯( bracelet的名词复数 ) | |
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57 incurred | |
[医]招致的,遭受的; incur的过去式 | |
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58 contemptible | |
adj.可鄙的,可轻视的,卑劣的 | |
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59 butt | |
n.笑柄;烟蒂;枪托;臀部;v.用头撞或顶 | |
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60 allotted | |
分配,拨给,摊派( allot的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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61 hereditary | |
adj.遗传的,遗传性的,可继承的,世袭的 | |
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62 folly | |
n.愚笨,愚蠢,蠢事,蠢行,傻话 | |
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63 sneer | |
v.轻蔑;嘲笑;n.嘲笑,讥讽的言语 | |
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64 bastard | |
n.坏蛋,混蛋;私生子 | |
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65 propriety | |
n.正当行为;正当;适当 | |
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66 sneers | |
讥笑的表情(言语)( sneer的名词复数 ) | |
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67 rascally | |
adj. 无赖的,恶棍的 adv. 无赖地,卑鄙地 | |
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68 fussy | |
adj.为琐事担忧的,过分装饰的,爱挑剔的 | |
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69 memorandum | |
n.备忘录,便笺 | |
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70 enjoyment | |
n.乐趣;享有;享用 | |
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71 countenance | |
n.脸色,面容;面部表情;vt.支持,赞同 | |
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72 badinage | |
n.开玩笑,打趣 | |
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73 meditate | |
v.想,考虑,(尤指宗教上的)沉思,冥想 | |
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74 banish | |
vt.放逐,驱逐;消除,排除 | |
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75 faltered | |
(嗓音)颤抖( falter的过去式和过去分词 ); 支吾其词; 蹒跚; 摇晃 | |
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76 retired | |
adj.隐退的,退休的,退役的 | |
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77 embarrassments | |
n.尴尬( embarrassment的名词复数 );难堪;局促不安;令人难堪或耻辱的事 | |
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78 misery | |
n.痛苦,苦恼,苦难;悲惨的境遇,贫苦 | |
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