I collected in a manuscript everything which concerned my departure and the methods of communication and signaling. What yet remained to be determined was the means to be adopted for returning to our own territory, if such a return were possible. I proposed that we make use of two mediums, the aeroplane and motorboat.... About a month after our departure an Italian reconnoitring plane was to let fall 131 a volley of three shots from the sky over Vittorio. Two days after we had observed this signal we were to be found in such a field as shall have been determined upon and upon which we shall have already alighted at two in the morning. The “Voisin” would fly very low over the field and if Captain Gelmetti observed certain lights gleaming in the small trenches2 which were near the field, he would make a landing and we would depart with him. If the weather were unfavorable, the attempt was to be repeated the subsequent night. But we could not rely on one method only for the return. It was better to have some alternate way available.
I proposed that the silent naval3 motorboat, aforementioned, cruise during the nights from June 20 to June 30 in front of the port of Caorle, about two miles east of it. It was to keep about two hundred yards from the coast, in order that, should it hear the song of a cuckoo (such was to 132 be our signal) it might send a rowboat to fetch us. All this was to take place at two in the morning. It seemed to me that I had thought of everything; it seemed to me that I had studied all the details.
Our front had been divided into many sectors4 each of which had a special number, and the established phrase, “the wolf will not return towards such and such a number” signified that the enemy intended to attack that sector5 of the front. Colonel Smaniotto was well pleased with my plan and with my personal appearance which was really most encouraging. My beard had really assumed tremendous proportions and it bothered me considerably6. That night the light of the moon was bright enough to permit us to experiment on landing without lights. Captain Gelmetti had placed himself at our disposal for the necessary trials. For experiments with the silencer the officer who invented the apparatus7 had come purposely from headquarters, together with 133 some expert mechanics for whom we had sent in a request.
At about ten o’clock at night we ascended8 from the field at Marcon and after several landings with the help of searchlights the pilot attempted a landing without the use of any lights and his management was so skillful that we were not conscious of the moment in which we touched ground. I was truly astonished at the familiarity with which Bottecchia viewed aeroplanes. During the flight I watched him closely to see if he showed any signs of fear, or if he held onto the sides of the seat as most beginners do. He really conducted himself valiantly10 and no sudden move or action belied11 the faith I had placed in him. The officers who were present at the experiments told me that when the motor was turning slowly and the silencer was working the plane made only a slight noise which was scarcely audible even to those standing12 directly beneath.
I told another person about my plans, 134 Lieut. Manfredi Lanza di Trabia, brother of Ignatius, one of my dearest friends who disappeared mysteriously during the retreat from Caporetto and from whom I have had no more news. However, considering all the circumstances, we still believed him to be alive, perhaps because we loved him too well to permit ourselves to believe that he has disappeared forever. To Manfredi also I promised to send a postcard with the conventional word, “arrivederci,” which would be the sign of my departure.
Several changes were made in the silencer because it became over-heated too rapidly. We hoped that it would now function properly. But the weather which had been clear up to date, changed and seemed determined to thwart13 our plans.
On May 26 there was a full moon. The nights favorable for attempting our project were to last only until the first of June. After that we should be compelled to relinquish14 our plan or to devise some 135 other way. Days of cruel alternation passed, and we were continually standing with our faces turned upward to the sky in the hope of espying15 some bit of azure16 among the thick clouds which crowded overhead. This inclement17 weather made us nervous, uncertain, whereas we needed a great deal of calm to be in the proper mood for our attempt.
Colonel Smaniotto gave me 2000 Austrian crowns that I be not encumbered18 by too much coin. In case I needed more money I was to send a notice to them by means of a carrier pigeon. This idea of carrying Austrian crowns with me was not very agreeable because it would be a compromising fact and grave accusation19 against us were we to be captured. However, I decided20 to keep the suspicious roll always in my hand and at the first alarm to throw it away so as not to be surprised with it. I also had to sign a statement for the supreme21 command in which I declared that I was 136 undertaking22 the feat23 absolutely of my own volition24 and that I was not compelled or coerced25 by any external pressure. I am truly proud of this document. My soldier also signed a similar document very willingly.
It really seemed as if all the clouds of the Veneto had made an appointment with one another to meet over our field. In vain we sought a sign which would let us hope for a happy solution. It was now the thirtieth of May, so there were but two more nights at our disposal. After that we should have to bid “adieu” to our plan fostered for so long. It was torture to think that our presence on the other side would be of extraordinary value just then, because from the answers to questions asked of Czech prisoners we knew that the Austrian offensive could not be delayed much longer. Therefore, our enforced pause was all the more dangerous, because beside necessitating26 a new scheme of preparations, it 137 might also result in our arriving across the Piave too late.
Gelmetti’s mood was insupportable. Instead of trying to comfort one another we were continually irritating and provoking our companions. We were annoyed, spiteful one with the other, as though each one of us were the cause of our painful delay.
The barometer27 on the morning of May 31, had risen slightly, but still I did not see any sign of clearing; the rain continued to beat madly against the windows of our hangar. I contemplated28 with love and wrath29 the great metal skeleton of our apparatus, resting heavily on its wheels. The huge canvas of the hangar struggled violently with the bonds which fastened it to the ground. Suddenly a tiny ray of sunlight illumined the canvas hanging limp and damp. I leapt out onto the field. The direction of the wind had changed. The rain had miraculously30 stopped, and the storm clouds were fleeing towards the sea. 138 In the background the bluish mountains with their snow-capped tops were outlined against the distant horizon.
It seemed as if there were fair weather on the other side of the Piave. We would soon know from the reports of such chasing planes as had left this morning. Meanwhile, there was not a moment to be lost. It was three in the afternoon and there was much to be done ere we left. Quickly I telephoned to headquarters and the voice of Colonel Smaniotto answered me. He was delighted at the unexpected turn of events.
“Sir, if you offer no opposition31 we have decided to leave to-night.”
“What opposition should I have? On the other hand, I am elated at this brief respite32 which has come so suddenly. One of our proverbs says there is no Saturday without a bit of sun, but to-day is Friday. I’ll see you shortly.”
Everything was going well. The only thing that annoyed me was that the day was 139 Friday. We Italians are a bit superstitious33 and it did not seem expedient34 to start a project of this nature on a Friday. I confessed my doubts to Gelmetti and he braced35 me by scolding me. “How foolish you are! Don’t you really want to take advantage of this respite which may be the only one? For I am convinced that the weather is still unsettled and remains36 determined to be crazy. If we do not leave to-night, we can forsake37 our project forever.” I let myself be convinced, but a little unwillingly38.
Gelmetti was radiant, and was dressing39 himself in his toilette for great occasions, for we aviators40 are habitually41 dirty and oil-stained while at camp, but the moment we have to leave for a flight or some special action, we become fastidious and dandified; we don our best outfits42, for we must be clean and elegant when we face the enemy, when we face death.
I too, had to consider my toilette, because I did not think my coat with the yellow 140 collar would be the most suitable for such an undertaking. I donned a soldier’s coat with the distinguishing mark of the observer on the sleeve, and I prepared my observer’s tally43 for I decided to take it with me, as is customary with all aviators.
Through the window I observed that the “Voisin” was out on the field and that they were filling her up with the supplies of gasoline and oil. One of the mechanics had jumped up onto a wing and with a large can was filling the feed above the wing. His demeanor44 was that of a tranquil45 trainer who knows his beast; he was singing snatches of a song popular among our soldiers:
“Oh rare, delightful46 sweetheart Beloved and sought by all, You are that dear strange creature, For whom by chance we fall.”
Another mechanic was testing the motor with his fingers on the gas control to see the response of the six powerful cylinders47. To me, whose ear is well trained after many 141 flights over the enemy, the motor appeared to function well, and this gave me great confidence. A lieutenant48 from the general staff who is a specialist in the use of the silencer, was explaining to Gelmetti how to set the silencer in action. After a brief discussion they decided that we were not to use this attachment49 on leaving our territory, but to ascend9 with open exhaust and use the silencer only when we had arrived in enemy territory where it would be necessary to make no noise. These precautions were necessary so as not to strain the motor.
How rapidly my life seemed to flee during those hours, those minutes which still separated me from the moment when I should find myself face to face with the reality against which I have prepared and which I have long desired.
I entreated50 Colonel Smaniotto to communicate to my family that I was well every time he received a pigeon with a message from me. He promised to do it, and I was 142 contented51 because I did not like my people to remain for long without news of me. However, I had to notify my father that I should be far away for a long time. I had had a photograph of myself with my beard taken, and above it I wrote the date, May 23, to recall the other 23rd of May, the day on which Italy entered the war. Had I no other joy in the world, it would suffice me to know that Italy was not beneath the other great powers and that she too had taken sides with righteousness and liberty. In sending to my father a last message before my departure I wrote the following lines with great emotion, “May 31, 1918. Dear father,—I beg of you not to worry if you do not receive a message from me for a long time. I am leaving on a special mission, and I do not believe I shall be able to communicate with you directly, but you will receive news of my condition from headquarters. I ask this new sacrifice of you in the name of the suffering lands which are 143 waiting for us. May we meet again. A kiss to you.... (P.S. I shall bring a greeting to mother from you.)” My mother is buried at Vittorio and from the closing words he would understand the destination of my mission. This was the only hint I gave my father of where I intended going.
Bottecchia and the De Carli brothers were eating. My soldier, who has a sturdy exterior52, was storing as much food as he could in his inside, for he feared, with reason, that it would be difficult to find food on the other side. I, on the contrary, when I am about to undertake something important can swallow only a very small quantity and a sober repast is sufficient to appease53 my appetite. Night fell slowly over the field, and I lighted a lamp so I might see to write two postcards to my distant friends. On each one I wrote “arrivederci” and my name. They will understand. Every promise is an obligation, and Luisa 144 and Manfredi were awaiting this signal from me to know that I had left.
The telephone bell rang unexpectedly. They wanted me at once at headquarters because his Highness the Duke of Aosta wished to see me before I left. In an open car we sped along the endless line of budding poplar trees whose silent shadows were traced on the white road. The trunks in front of us stood bold and upright against the red of the sunset. From the pools and ditches a light fog arose and escaped in a mist towards the sky where the first stars began to twinkle.
The villa54 of the Duke of Aosta stood in the center of Mogliano, and there were no marks which distinguished55 it from the surrounding villas56, save that the flowers were more carefully cultivated. The Duke’s dogs playfully greeted the visitors. His Highness was expecting us in the broad ante-chamber. He clasped my hand, and we had a long affable talk together. His tall figure, 145 which became slightly bent57 after Caporetto, has all the majesty58 of his race; expressing at the same time a certain paternal59 goodness. His face furrowed60 by nights of anxiety and watching, expresses the ability and habit of command; his clear, penetrating61 eyes are accustomed to look fate well in the face. The Duke wished to know in detail all we planned to do. He knew the broad outlines and Colonel Smaniotto and I explained a few details he did not know. He noticed that I had changed the collar of my uniform and I told him the reason which induced me to make the change and the displeasure I felt at not being able to bear upon the other side the colors of my regiment62 to which I am still devoted63. Before we left, he again clasped my hand firmly and with a steady voice in which there was barely a shadow of emotion, said, “I thank you for what you are about to attempt. I am convinced of the usefulness of your enterprise, and I am certain you will help us greatly in those 146 days when the enemy hurls64 against us all his desperate strength. I thank you as a Prince and as an Italian, and you know I am a good Italian.”
I know that his Royal Highness is a good Italian and I felt that in difficult moments, in moments when I should have to dare and risk all, the memory of that dear, austere65 face, would be a great help and comfort in the fulfillment of my duty.
I left the house of the Duke of Aosta, moved not by what I was about to undertake but by what he said to me. There was not much time to lose, yet I dearly wished to give a farewell greeting to Lieutenant Lanza di Camastra who is the uncle of my intimate friend Ignatius Lanza di Trabia. He is very intimate with his Royal Highness, knew of our plans, but since he wished to be present at my departure he begged me to send for him. In the little courtyard of the villa in which he lived I found several officers who offered me a small glass of 147 cognac. I relished66 it, sipping67 it to the last delicious drop, certain that on the other side I should find nothing of the kind. I was very pleased to spend a few moments with Lieutenant di Camastra because I wished to speak to him of Ignatius who we hoped was still alive and interned68 in some distant German camp. The thought of this dear friend had often given me strength to overcome the innumerable difficulties which presented themselves before arriving at this point. With gratitude69 I listened to the words of di Camastra who assured me that Ignatius would be proud could he see me depart.
Before leaving my mother-country, since I was certain I should not be able to return, I wished to be at peace with my conscience, and accompanied by my dear friend we went towards the vicarage of Mogliano where there was a priest who could take my confession70. After knocking repeatedly at the gate, an old priest, who wondered why unknown visitors should come to disturb him 148 at so late an hour, thrust his head from behind the door. At last he opened the door and led me into a small, low room where there was a prayerstool.... For a moment I reviewed swiftly the events of my life, and alas71, there were only a few actions for which I needed not to be repentant72. God is good, I thought, and will heed73 my sincere prayer. So when the priest absolved74 me, I felt that to all the strength I had before there had been added the new strength which comes to those who feel they are pure.
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1
determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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trenches
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| 深沟，地沟( trench的名词复数 )； 战壕 | |
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naval
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| adj.海军的，军舰的，船的 | |
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sectors
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| n.部门( sector的名词复数 )；领域；防御地区；扇形 | |
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sector
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| n.部门，部分；防御地段，防区；扇形 | |
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considerably
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| adv.极大地；相当大地；在很大程度上 | |
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apparatus
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| n.装置，器械；器具，设备 | |
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ascended
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| v.上升，攀登( ascend的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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ascend
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| vi.渐渐上升，升高；vt.攀登，登上 | |
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valiantly
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| adv.勇敢地，英勇地；雄赳赳 | |
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belied
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| v.掩饰( belie的过去式和过去分词 )；证明（或显示）…为虚假；辜负；就…扯谎 | |
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standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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thwart
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| v.阻挠，妨碍，反对；adj.横(断的) | |
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relinquish
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| v.放弃，撤回，让与，放手 | |
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espying
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| v.看到( espy的现在分词 ) | |
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16
azure
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| adj.天蓝色的，蔚蓝色的 | |
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inclement
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| adj.严酷的，严厉的，恶劣的 | |
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encumbered
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| v.妨碍，阻碍，拖累( encumber的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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accusation
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| n.控告，指责，谴责 | |
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decided
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| adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的 | |
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supreme
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| adj.极度的，最重要的；至高的，最高的 | |
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undertaking
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| n.保证，许诺，事业 | |
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feat
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| n.功绩；武艺，技艺；adj.灵巧的，漂亮的，合适的 | |
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volition
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| n.意志；决意 | |
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coerced
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| v.迫使做( coerce的过去式和过去分词 )；强迫；（以武力、惩罚、威胁等手段）控制；支配 | |
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necessitating
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| 使…成为必要，需要( necessitate的现在分词 ) | |
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barometer
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| n.气压表，睛雨表，反应指标 | |
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contemplated
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| adj. 预期的 动词contemplate的过去分词形式 | |
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wrath
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| n.愤怒，愤慨，暴怒 | |
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miraculously
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| ad.奇迹般地 | |
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opposition
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| n.反对，敌对 | |
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respite
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| n.休息，中止，暂缓 | |
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superstitious
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| adj.迷信的 | |
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expedient
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| adj.有用的，有利的；n.紧急的办法，权宜之计 | |
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braced
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| adj.拉牢的v.支住( brace的过去式和过去分词 )；撑牢；使自己站稳；振作起来 | |
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remains
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| n.剩余物，残留物；遗体，遗迹 | |
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forsake
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| vt.遗弃，抛弃；舍弃，放弃 | |
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unwillingly
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| adv.不情愿地 | |
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dressing
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| n.(食物)调料；包扎伤口的用品，敷料 | |
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aviators
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| 飞机驾驶员，飞行员( aviator的名词复数 ) | |
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habitually
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| ad.习惯地，通常地 | |
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outfits
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| n.全套装备( outfit的名词复数 )；一套服装；集体；组织v.装备，配置设备，供给服装( outfit的第三人称单数 ) | |
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tally
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| n.计数器，记分，一致，测量；vt.计算，记录，使一致；vi.计算，记分，一致 | |
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demeanor
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| n.行为；风度 | |
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45
tranquil
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| adj. 安静的, 宁静的, 稳定的, 不变的 | |
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delightful
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| adj.令人高兴的，使人快乐的 | |
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cylinders
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| n.圆筒( cylinder的名词复数 )；圆柱；汽缸；（尤指用作容器的）圆筒状物 | |
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lieutenant
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| n.陆军中尉，海军上尉；代理官员，副职官员 | |
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attachment
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| n.附属物，附件；依恋；依附 | |
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50
entreated
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| 恳求，乞求( entreat的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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51
contented
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| adj.满意的，安心的，知足的 | |
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52
exterior
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| adj.外部的，外在的；表面的 | |
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53
appease
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| v.安抚，缓和，平息，满足 | |
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54
villa
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| n.别墅，城郊小屋 | |
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55
distinguished
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| adj.卓越的，杰出的，著名的 | |
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56
villas
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| 别墅，公馆( villa的名词复数 )； （城郊）住宅 | |
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bent
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| n.爱好，癖好；adj.弯的；决心的，一心的 | |
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58
majesty
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| n.雄伟，壮丽，庄严，威严；最高权威，王权 | |
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59
paternal
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| adj.父亲的，像父亲的，父系的，父方的 | |
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60
furrowed
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| v.犁田，开沟( furrow的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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61
penetrating
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| adj.（声音）响亮的，尖锐的adj.（气味）刺激的adj.（思想）敏锐的，有洞察力的 | |
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regiment
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| n.团，多数，管理；v.组织，编成团，统制 | |
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devoted
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| adj.忠诚的，忠实的，热心的，献身于...的 | |
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64
hurls
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| v.猛投，用力掷( hurl的第三人称单数 )；大声叫骂 | |
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austere
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| adj.艰苦的；朴素的，朴实无华的；严峻的 | |
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66
relished
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| v.欣赏( relish的过去式和过去分词 )；从…获得乐趣；渴望 | |
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sipping
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| v.小口喝，呷，抿( sip的现在分词 ) | |
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68
interned
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| v.拘留，关押( intern的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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69
gratitude
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| adj.感激，感谢 | |
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70
confession
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| n.自白，供认，承认 | |
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71
alas
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| int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等) | |
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72
repentant
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| adj.对…感到悔恨的 | |
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73
heed
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| v.注意，留意；n.注意，留心 | |
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74
absolved
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| 宣告…无罪，赦免…的罪行，宽恕…的罪行( absolve的过去式和过去分词 )； 不受责难，免除责任 [义务] ,开脱（罪责） | |
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