Before Mr. Moss1 rejoined him, Aaron had repented2 of his promise to call and see the young couple in the evening. This vacillation3 was a proof of the effect recent events had had upon his mind; it was really unbalanced; the prompt decision of all matters, whether great or small, which presented themselves for consideration, seemed to have deserted4 him. He felt that he could not depend upon himself in the promised interview with Ruth, and that he might precipitate5 a discovery, the proper time for which, he believed, had not yet arrived. That it would have to be made eventually was certain; truth and justice demanded it, and the claim should be met, but not to-day, not until other plans with respect to his future were settled. For there had already grown in his mind a conviction that he was not worthy6 of the position he held among his co-religionists, that it was his duty to retire into obscurity, and not presume to teach what should be done in important issues where he himself had so signally failed. He mentally asked why had he not recognised this earlier; and the answer that trod upon the heels of the question brought a pitiful smile of self-despisal to his lips. He had been living deliberately7 in an atmosphere of deceit, trusting to chance to avoid detection and exposure. He could lay blame upon no other shoulders than his own; he, and he alone, was responsible for the consequences of his acts. Well, he would not shrink from them, he would accept them humbly8, and rest his hopes in the mercy of God. If, when the hour arrived for open confession--and arrive it must before many weeks were past--he could still retain the love of his wife, if she would forgive him for the deception9 he had practised, he would be content, he might even be happy again, fallen as he would be from his high estate. Meanwhile there lay upon him the obligation of lifting Ruth and her husband from poverty, of placing them in an honourable10 and independent position, and this task he would ask his friend Mr. Moss to undertake for him.
"All is explained," he said, when that gentleman re-entered the room. "Ruth has done what cannot be undone11. She and Mr. Storndale are married."
"Married!" exclaimed Mr. Moss. He was startled at the news, but no less startled at the calm voice in which it was communicated to him. "What are you going to do about it?"
"Accept it," replied Aaron; "there is no alternative."
"It is an outrage12. He should be made to suffer for it."
"He must not be made to suffer for it, nor must Ruth. Apart from the personal consideration of the matter so far as it affects myself, and from another consideration which doubtless is in your mind, Mr. Storndale has acted as honourably13 as we could expect from one in his position. There has been concealment14 and deception, but it is not for me to cast a stone against him. The young man is in difficulties, and I have resolved to clear him from them, and to provide for Ruth's future. They will expect to see me to-night; but I cannot trust myself. I wish you to undertake the task for me, and to carry the whole matter through. Mr. Moss, all through my life you have been my sincere friend, and I value your friendship; you will not fail me now?"
"No, Cohen, no; I will do whatever you wish me to do; but it is hardly what I expected of you."
"You are surprised that I do not show anger at this marriage, that I do not express resentment15 against Mr. Storndale?"
"I am."
"Before long," said Aaron, placing his hand on his friend's shoulder, "you will understand why I am so calm. I can trust you, and when I confess that there was in my life an hour when temptation assailed16 me and I fell before it, I feel that my confidence will be respected until the time arrives when all the world will know what is hidden in my breast, what has been hidden for the last twenty years."
"For the last twenty years! Cohen, that takes us back to the old Gosport days!"
"It does. But ask me no questions now, for I am not prepared to answer them. Great changes are coming in my life, and I must arm myself to meet them. If only Rachel will forgive!"
He covered his eyes with his hand, and turned away.
"Cohen," said Mr. Moss presently, "I see that you are unstrung, that you are suffering. You are doing yourself an injustice17; I am sure of it, I am sure of it. I do not pretend to understand what it is that distresses18 you, but I would like to say that you may depend upon me in any difficulty. You may turn against yourself, but you are not going to turn an old friend like me against you."
Aaron pressed Mr. Moss's hand, and then explained the task he wished performed. Mr. Moss was to call upon Ruth and her husband, and obtain from them an honest and faithful account of their position. This done, he was to pay every shilling the young man owed; after which a settlement of a thousand pounds a year was to be made upon Ruth as a marriage portion, the money to be absolutely at her own disposal.
"It is not a great deal," said Aaron, "for a gentleman, the son of a peer, to live upon; but his family in a little while, when they learn the truth about Ruth"--he paused, and Mr. Moss nodded gravely; a strange suspicion was beginning to haunt him--"may be disposed to forgive him, and through their influence he may obtain a lucrative19 appointment. From the way in which he spoke20 I am disposed to think that he may turn over a new leaf, and that an honourable future may lie before him and Ruth. Give her my love, and say that circumstances render it impossible for me to see her for a few days, and that when we meet I shall have something of great importance to disclose to her. Be patient with me, Mr. Moss. My words point to a mystery which will soon be public property. What you are about to do for me can scarcely be finished before the end of the week, but I cannot rest until it is finished. My own affairs will entirely21 occupy me, and I must run down to Bournemouth to see Rachel."
"I will not waste a moment," said Mr. Moss. "How about the money necessary for the settlement and the payment of Mr. Storndale's debts? Have you calculated how much it will cost you? A large sum, Cohen."
"It will be forthcoming; the means will be placed in your hands to-morrow. Do not return here tonight. Come and breakfast with me at nine in the morning."
Aaron sat up till long past midnight, making calculations, and arranging his affairs. He was quite resolved to retire from public life, and altogether from business; and to effect this there was much to do. He had uncompleted contracts in hand which he would transfer to employers of whose methods he approved, and he had just obtained another which a dozen contractors23 would be eager to take off his hands. He thought of Mr. Poynter, and shook his head. To such a man he could not entrust24 any of his responsibilities. Then he devoted25 himself to an examination of his private financial position.
After providing for Ruth he calculated that he could realise a sum of about ninety thousand pounds, in addition to which there were his house and furniture, which would realise another ten thousand. One third of this would be sufficient to provide for Ruth and her husband, one third should be divided among the Jewish charities, and one third should be invested for himself and Rachel. This would produce an income of between eight and nine hundred pounds, amply sufficient for the maintenance of a comfortable home either in London or the country.
"Rachel will be content," he thought; "and the years that are left to us shall be passed in peace, away from the turmoil26 and fever of life. If she will but forgive me--if she will but forgive!"
All depended upon that.
He held offices of honour in the synagogue which he would immediately resign; there and then he wrote his letters of resignation. There had been a time when he was called upon to support a movement in respect of these honourable offices. A man who had grown rich by usury27 and fraud had succeeded in getting himself nominated for a high position in the synagogue, and this had aroused the displeasure of the more respectable members of the community, who had enlisted28 Aaron on their side. His all-powerful influence had settled the question, and the usurer was taught a salutary lesson. From that time a strict watch was kept upon these dignities, which were conferred upon none whose past lives would not bear strict scrutiny29. Aaron thought of this as he drew forth22 the address upon modern Judaism he had undertaken to deliver, hoping thereby30 to counteract31 the loose views of religious obligations which threatened to sap the foundations of the old faith. He read the powerful arguments he had written to this end, and sighed as he read.
"Not for me the task," he murmured. "Not for me. I am not worthy. It is for me to learn, not to teach."
He tore the manuscript and burned it; he had forfeited32 the right to show his brethren the path of duty.
At length he came to the end of his labours. Before he retired33 to rest he prayed long and fervently34, and offered up supplications for forgiveness.
At nine o'clock in the morning Mr. Moss presented himself, and reported what he had done.
"Everything is in such straight order," he said, "that the whole business can be finished to-morrow."
"It will be a great weight off my mind," said Aaron, "when all the papers are signed. I have letters from Rachel and Esther." He passed the young girl's letter to Mr. Moss. "She says there is no change in Rachel, but that she thinks the air and change of scene are doing her good. If you write to Esther do not hint at any impending35 trouble, and do not mention Ruth's name, lest Rachel should suspect that something was wrong. I ought to tell you, Mr. Moss, that I have resolved to retire into private life; I shall be much happier, and I am sure Rachel will be. It is a sudden resolution, and I daresay my friends will be surprised; but I am fixed36, nothing can induce me to change my mind."
"And your contracts, Cohen?" asked Mr. Moss, who was sufficiently37 familiar with Aaron's character to know that remonstrance39 at present would be thrown away.
"I shall transfer them. My earnest wish is that I shall be forgotten, and allowed to live in peace. I am growing old; let my place, which I unworthily hold, be occupied by a better man."
"That is hardly likely to come to pass," said Mr. Moss, gravely. "You are not old; you are in the prime of life, with very many years of usefulness before you. But I will not argue with you; when you have recovered from your depression, when Rachel is well again, you will think better of it. We need you; no other man can fill your place, and you will not be allowed to retire without remonstrance. But we will wait till Sunday, when you are to deliver your address upon 'Judaism, its Duties and Obligations.' After it is delivered it will be printed in pamphlet form, will it not?"
"No; it will be neither delivered nor printed."
"Cohen!" exclaimed Mr. Moss, amazed at this statement.
"It is as I say, Mr. Moss," said Aaron, firmly.
"But it is expected; it is looked forward to, and the best results are anticipated from it. You will not go from your word?"
"I must. The address is destroyed. I must bear whatever is said of me; I accept it as part of my punishment."
"Of your punishment! I do not understand you."
"You will by-and-by. Mr. Moss, the man who presumes to set down laws of right and wrong should be above reproach. Can a thief preach honesty? Can a liar38 lift his voice in praise of truth?"
"These are strange utterances40, Cohen, from your lips."
"There is a sad foundation for them. To know yourself--that is the height of human wisdom; and I have learned too late. Pray do not continue the subject; you stand in the dark, I in the light."
"Well, well," said Mr. Moss, with a sigh, "we will speak of this another time. But I do not see what you can have to reproach yourself with."
"Let every man search his own heart," replied Aaron, and his voice was very mournful. "He will find the answer there. And now we will waste no more time in idle conversation. We must go to the lawyers and the bank. Have you a list of Mr. Storndale's debts? Ah, thank you." He looked at the total, and drew a cheque for the amount. "The payment of these claims will keep you busy during the day. I will give instructions to the lawyers to prepare the deed of settlement, and tomorrow it can be signed. You will be a trustee; I will call upon a gentleman who will be the other. I shall spend to-night at Bournemouth, and will come back by an early train in the morning."
"Will you not see Ruth before you leave?" asked Mr. Moss.
"No, not till everything is finished. How is she?"
"Well and happy, and overjoyed that you are not angry with her. Between ourselves, Cohen, it is not what she expected." Under his breath he added, "Nor what I expected, either."
"She has all the more reason for contentment," said Aaron. "I wish her to be happy."
They had a busy time with lawyers, stockbrokers41, bank managers, and creditors42, and Aaron just managed to catch the two-twenty train for Bournemouth. He passed a quiet evening with Rachel and Esther, and answered such questions put by his wife concerning Ruth in a manner which seemed to satisfy her, for she did not press him upon the subject. With Esther he had a private conversation, and cautioned her to preserve silence as to the letter she had received. On the following morning he took train for London, and arriving before noon, found everything prepared for a final settlement of his plans for Ruth's worldly future. When the deeds were signed, and the consols bought and deposited in the Bank of England, Aaron breathed more freely. He had made some small atonement to Ruth for the deception of which he had been guilty.
"We have had no honeymoon43 trip," said the Honourable Percy Storndale to him, "and I am thinking of taking Ruth to the Continent tomorrow."
"Yes," said Aaron, absently.
"But," added Mr. Storndale, "the trip will have no pleasure for her if she does not see you before we go."
"I will come with you now," said Aaron.
They met and parted without any warm expression of affection. Such a demonstration44 from Ruth towards one whom she believed to be her father, but for whom she had never entertained a strong love, would have been a new feature in her character, and grateful as she was for his generosity45 she was held back by the feeling that she had given him a poor return for his life-long kindness towards her, and by her fear that he was quietly angry with her; while Aaron was held back by the consciousness of his wrong-doing. And so the young couple went forth to commence their new life, and the secret of Ruth's birth was still unrevealed.
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1
moss
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| n.苔，藓，地衣 | |
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repented
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| 对（自己的所为）感到懊悔或忏悔( repent的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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3
vacillation
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| n.动摇；忧柔寡断 | |
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deserted
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| adj.荒芜的，荒废的，无人的，被遗弃的 | |
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5
precipitate
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| adj.突如其来的；vt.使突然发生；n.沉淀物 | |
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6
worthy
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| adj.(of)值得的，配得上的；有价值的 | |
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7
deliberately
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| adv.审慎地；蓄意地；故意地 | |
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8
humbly
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| adv. 恭顺地，谦卑地 | |
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9
deception
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| n.欺骗，欺诈；骗局，诡计 | |
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10
honourable
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| adj.可敬的；荣誉的，光荣的 | |
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11
undone
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| a.未做完的，未完成的 | |
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outrage
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| n.暴行，侮辱，愤怒；vt.凌辱，激怒 | |
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13
honourably
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| adv.可尊敬地，光荣地，体面地 | |
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concealment
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| n.隐藏, 掩盖，隐瞒 | |
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resentment
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| n.怨愤，忿恨 | |
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16
assailed
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| v.攻击( assail的过去式和过去分词 )；困扰；质问；毅然应对 | |
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17
injustice
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| n.非正义，不公正，不公平，侵犯（别人的）权利 | |
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18
distresses
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| n.悲痛( distress的名词复数 )；痛苦；贫困；危险 | |
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lucrative
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| adj.赚钱的，可获利的 | |
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20
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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entirely
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| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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forth
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| adv.向前；向外，往外 | |
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contractors
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| n.（建筑、监造中的）承包人( contractor的名词复数 ) | |
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24
entrust
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| v.信赖，信托，交托 | |
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25
devoted
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| adj.忠诚的，忠实的，热心的，献身于...的 | |
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turmoil
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| n.骚乱，混乱，动乱 | |
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usury
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| n.高利贷 | |
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28
enlisted
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| adj.应募入伍的v.（使）入伍， （使）参军( enlist的过去式和过去分词 )；获得（帮助或支持） | |
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29
scrutiny
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| n.详细检查，仔细观察 | |
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thereby
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| adv.因此，从而 | |
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counteract
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| vt.对…起反作用，对抗，抵消 | |
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32
forfeited
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| （因违反协议、犯规、受罚等）丧失，失去( forfeit的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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retired
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| adj.隐退的，退休的，退役的 | |
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fervently
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| adv.热烈地，热情地，强烈地 | |
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impending
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| a.imminent, about to come or happen | |
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fixed
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| adj.固定的，不变的，准备好的；(计算机)固定的 | |
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sufficiently
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| adv.足够地，充分地 | |
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liar
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| n.说谎的人 | |
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remonstrance
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| n抗议，抱怨 | |
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40
utterances
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| n.发声( utterance的名词复数 )；说话方式；语调；言论 | |
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41
stockbrokers
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| n.股票经纪人( stockbroker的名词复数 ) | |
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42
creditors
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| n.债权人，债主( creditor的名词复数 ) | |
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43
honeymoon
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| n.蜜月（假期）；vi.度蜜月 | |
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44
demonstration
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| n.表明，示范，论证，示威 | |
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45
generosity
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| n.大度，慷慨，慷慨的行为 | |
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