A WHITE-WASHED UNCLE

IN our small lives that day was eventful when another uncle was to come down from town, and submit his character and qualifications (albeit unconsciously) to our careful criticism. Earlier uncles had been weighed in the balance, and—alas!—found grievously wanting. There was Uncle Thomas—a failure from the first. Not that his disposition¹ was malevolent², nor were his habits such as to unfit him for decent society; but his rooted conviction seemed to be that the reason of a child’s existence was to serve as a butt³ for senseless adult jokes—or what, from the accompanying guffaws⁴ of laughter, appeared to be intended for jokes. Now, we were anxious that he should have a perfectly⁵ fair trial; so in the tool-house, between breakfast and lessons, we discussed and examined all his witticisms⁶ one by one, calmly, critically,[30] dispassionately. It was no good: we could not discover any salt in them. And as only a genuine gift of humour could have saved Uncle Thomas—for he pretended to naught⁷ besides—he was reluctantly writ⁸ down a hopeless impostor.

Uncle George—the youngest—was distinctly more promising⁹. He accompanied us cheerily round the establishment—suffered himself to be introduced to each of the cows—held out the right hand of fellowship to the pig—and even hinted that a pair of pink-eyed Himalayan rabbits might arrive—unexpectedly—from town some day. We were just considering whether in this fertile soil an apparently¹⁰ accidental remark on the solid qualities of guinea-pigs or ferrets might haply blossom and bring forth¹¹ fruit, when our governess appeared on the scene. Uncle George’s manner at once underwent a complete and contemptible¹² change. His interest in rational topics seemed, ‘like a fountain’s sickening pulse,’ to flag and ebb¹³ away; and though Miss Smedley’s ostensible¹⁴ purpose was to take Selina for her usual walk,[31] I can vouch¹⁵ for it that Selina spent her morning ratting, along with the keeper’s boy and me; while if Miss Smedley walked with any one, it would appear to have been with Uncle George.

But, despicable as his conduct had been, he underwent no hasty condemnation¹⁶. The defection was discussed in all its bearings, but it seemed sadly clear at last that this uncle must possess some innate¹⁷ badness of character and fondness for low company. We who from daily experience knew Miss Smedley like a book—were we not only too well aware that she had neither accomplishments¹⁸ nor charms—no characteristic, in fact, but an inbred viciousness of temper and disposition? True, she knew the dates of the English kings by heart; but how could that profit Uncle George, who, having passed into the army, had ascended¹⁹ beyond the need of useful information? Our bows and arrows, on the other hand, had been freely placed at his disposal; and a soldier should not have hesitated in his choice a moment. No: Uncle George had fallen from grace, and was[32] unanimously damned. And the non-arrival of the Himalayan rabbits was only another nail in his coffin²⁰. Uncles, therefore, were just then a heavy and lifeless market, and there was little inclination²¹ to deal. Still it was agreed that Uncle William, who had just returned from India, should have as fair a trial as the others; more especially as romantic possibilities might well be embodied²² in one who had held the gorgeous East in fee.

Selina had kicked my shins—like the girl she is!—during a scuffle in the passage, and I was still rubbing them with one hand when I found that the uncle-on-approbation was half-heartedly shaking the other. A florid, elderly man, quite unmistakably nervous, he let drop one grimy paw after another, and, turning very red, with an awkward simulation of heartiness²³, ‘Well, h’are y’all?’ he said, ‘Glad to see me, eh?’ As we could hardly, in justice, be expected to have formed an opinion on him at that early stage, we could but look at each other in silence; which scarce served to relieve the tension of the situation. Indeed, the cloud never[33] really lifted during his stay. In talking things over later, some one put forward the suggestion that he must at some time or other have committed a stupendous crime. But I could not bring myself to believe that the man, though evidently unhappy, was really guilty of anything; and I caught him once or twice looking at us with evident kindliness²⁴, though, seeing himself observed, he blushed and turned away his head.

When at last the atmosphere was clear of his depressing influence, we met despondently²⁵ in the potato-cellar—all of us, that is, but Harold, who had been told off to accompany his relative to the station; and the feeling was unanimous, that, as an uncle, William could not be allowed to pass. Selina roundly declared him a beast, pointing out that he had not even got us a half-holiday; and, indeed, there seemed little to do but to pass sentence. We were about to put it to the vote, when Harold appeared on the scene; his red face, round eyes, and mysterious demeanour, hinting at awful portents²⁶. Speechless he stood a space: then,[34] slowly drawing his hand from the pocket of his knickerbockers, he displayed on a dirty palm one—two—three—four half-crowns! We could but gaze—tranced, breathless, mute. Never had any of us seen, in the aggregate²⁷, so much bullion²⁸ before. Then Harold told his tale.

‘I took the old fellow to the station,’ he said, ‘and as we went along I told him all about the stationmaster’s family, and how I had seen the porter kissing our housemaid, and what a nice fellow he was, with no airs or affectation about him, and anything I thought would be of interest; but he didn’t seem to pay much attention, but walked along puffing²⁹ his cigar, and once I thought—I’m not certain, but I thought—I heard him say, “Well, thank God, that’s over!” When we got to the station he stopped suddenly, and said, “Hold on a minute!” Then he shoved these into my hand in a frightened sort of way, and said, “Look here, youngster! These are for you and the other kids. Buy what you like—make little beasts of yourselves—only don’t tell the old people, mind! Now cut away home!” So I cut.’

[35]

A solemn hush³⁰ fell on the assembly, broken first by the small Charlotte. ‘I didn’t know,’ she observed dreamily, ‘that there were such good men anywhere in the world. I hope he’ll die to-night, for then he’ll go straight to heaven!’ But the repentant³¹ Selina bewailed herself with tears and sobs³², refusing to be comforted; for that in her haste she had called this white-souled relative a beast.

‘I’ll tell you what we’ll do,’ said Edward, the master-mind, rising—as he always did—to the situation: ‘We’ll christen the piebald pig after him—the one that hasn’t got a name yet. And that’ll show we’re sorry for our mistake!’

‘I—I christened that pig this morning,’ Harold guiltily confessed; ‘I christened it after the curate. I’m very sorry—but he came and bowled to me last night, after you others had all been sent to bed early—and somehow I felt I had to do it!’

‘Oh, but that doesn’t count,’ said Edward hastily; ‘because we weren’t all there. We’ll take that christening off, and call it Uncle[36] William. And you can save up the curate for the next litter!’

And the motion being agreed to without a division, the House went into Committee of Supply.

1 disposition   

n.性情，性格；意向，倾向；排列，部署

参考例句：

• He has made a good disposition of his property.他已对财产作了妥善处理。
• He has a cheerful disposition.他性情开朗。

2 malevolent   

adj.有恶意的，恶毒的

参考例句：

• Why are they so malevolent to me?他们为什么对我如此恶毒？
• We must thwart his malevolent schemes.我们决不能让他的恶毒阴谋得逞。

3 butt   

n.笑柄；烟蒂；枪托；臀部；v.用头撞或顶

参考例句：

• The water butt catches the overflow from this pipe.大水桶盛接管子里流出的东西。
• He was the butt of their jokes.他是他们的笑柄。

4 guffaws   

n.大笑，狂笑( guffaw的名词复数 )v.大笑，狂笑( guffaw的第三人称单数 )

参考例句：

• Harry even had to cover his face duck out of view to hide his uncontrolled guffaws. 哈里王子更是一发不可收拾，捂住脸，狂笑起来。 来自互联网

5 perfectly   

adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地

参考例句：

• The witnesses were each perfectly certain of what they said.证人们个个对自己所说的话十分肯定。
• Everything that we're doing is all perfectly above board.我们做的每件事情都是光明正大的。

6 witticisms   

n.妙语，俏皮话( witticism的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• We do appreciate our own witticisms. 我们非常欣赏自己的小聪明。 来自辞典例句
• The interpreter at this dinner even managed to translate jokes and witticisms without losing the point. 这次宴会的翻译甚至能设法把笑话和俏皮话不失其妙意地翻译出来。 来自辞典例句

7 naught   

n.无，零 [=nought]

参考例句：

• He sets at naught every convention of society.他轻视所有的社会习俗。
• I hope that all your efforts won't go for naught.我希望你的努力不会毫无结果。

8 writ   

n.命令状，书面命令

参考例句：

• This is a copy of a writ I received this morning.这是今早我收到的书面命令副本。
• You shouldn't treat the newspapers as if they were Holy Writ. 你不应该把报上说的话奉若神明。

9 promising   

adj.有希望的，有前途的

参考例句：

• The results of the experiments are very promising.实验的结果充满了希望。
• We're trying to bring along one or two promising young swimmers.我们正设法培养出一两名有前途的年轻游泳选手。

10 apparently   

adv.显然地；表面上，似乎

参考例句：

• An apparently blind alley leads suddenly into an open space.山穷水尽，豁然开朗。
• He was apparently much surprised at the news.他对那个消息显然感到十分惊异。

11 forth   

adv.向前；向外，往外

参考例句：

• The wind moved the trees gently back and forth.风吹得树轻轻地来回摇晃。
• He gave forth a series of works in rapid succession.他很快连续发表了一系列的作品。

12 contemptible   

adj.可鄙的，可轻视的，卑劣的

参考例句：

• His personal presence is unimpressive and his speech contemptible.他气貌不扬，言语粗俗。
• That was a contemptible trick to play on a friend.那是对朋友玩弄的一出可鄙的把戏。

13 ebb   

vi.衰退，减退；n.处于低潮，处于衰退状态

参考例句：

• The flood and ebb tides alternates with each other.涨潮和落潮交替更迭。
• They swam till the tide began to ebb.他们一直游到开始退潮。

14 ostensible   

adj.(指理由)表面的，假装的

参考例句：

• The ostensible reason wasn't the real reason.表面上的理由并不是真正的理由。
• He resigned secretaryship on the ostensible ground of health.他借口身体不好，辞去书记的职务。

15 vouch   

v.担保；断定；n.被担保者

参考例句：

• They asked whether I was prepared to vouch for him.他们问我是否愿意为他作担保。
• I can vouch for the fact that he is a good worker.我保证他是好员工。

16 condemnation   

n.谴责; 定罪

参考例句：

• There was widespread condemnation of the invasion. 那次侵略遭到了人们普遍的谴责。
• The jury's condemnation was a shock to the suspect. 陪审团宣告有罪使嫌疑犯大为震惊。

17 innate   

adj.天生的，固有的，天赋的

参考例句：

• You obviously have an innate talent for music.你显然有天生的音乐才能。
• Correct ideas are not innate in the mind.人的正确思想不是自己头脑中固有的。

18 accomplishments   

n.造诣；完成( accomplishment的名词复数 )；技能；成绩；成就

参考例句：

• It was one of the President's greatest accomplishments. 那是总统最伟大的成就之一。
• Among her accomplishments were sewing,cooking,playing the piano and dancing. 她的才能包括缝纫、烹调、弹钢琴和跳舞。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》

19 ascended   

v.上升，攀登( ascend的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• He has ascended into heaven. 他已经升入了天堂。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• The climbers slowly ascended the mountain. 爬山运动员慢慢地登上了这座山。 来自《简明英汉词典》

20 coffin   

n.棺材，灵柩

参考例句：

• When one's coffin is covered,all discussion about him can be settled.盖棺论定。
• The coffin was placed in the grave.那口棺材已安放到坟墓里去了。

21 inclination   

n.倾斜；点头；弯腰；斜坡；倾度；倾向；爱好

参考例句：

• She greeted us with a slight inclination of the head.她微微点头向我们致意。
• I did not feel the slightest inclination to hurry.我没有丝毫着急的意思。

22 embodied   

v.表现( embody的过去式和过去分词 )；象征；包括；包含

参考例句：

• a politician who embodied the hopes of black youth 代表黑人青年希望的政治家
• The heroic deeds of him embodied the glorious tradition of the troops. 他的英雄事迹体现了军队的光荣传统。 来自《简明英汉词典》

23 heartiness   

诚实，热心

参考例句：

• However, he realized the air of empty-headed heartiness might also mask a shrewd mind. 但他知道，盲目的热情可能使伶俐的头脑发昏。
• There was in him the heartiness and intolerant joviality of the prosperous farmer. 在他身上有种生意昌隆的农场主常常表现出的春风得意欢天喜地的劲头，叫人消受不了。

24 kindliness   

n.厚道，亲切，友好的行为

参考例句：

• Martha looked up into a strange face and dark eyes alight with kindliness and concern. 马撒慢慢抬起头，映入眼帘的是张陌生的脸，脸上有一双充满慈爱和关注的眼睛。 来自辞典例句
• I think the chief thing that struck me about Burton was his kindliness. 我想，我对伯顿印象最深之处主要还是这个人的和善。 来自辞典例句

25 despondently   

adv.沮丧地，意志消沉地

参考例句：

• It had come to that, he reflected despondently. 事情已经到了这个地步了，他沉思着，感到心灰意懒。 来自辞典例句
• He shook his head despondently. 他沮丧地摇摇头。 来自辞典例句

26 portents   

n.预兆( portent的名词复数 )；征兆；怪事；奇物

参考例句：

• But even with this extra support, labour-market portents still look grim. 但是即使采取了额外支持措施，劳动力市场依然阴霾密布。 来自互联网
• So the hiccups are worth noting as portents. 因此这些问题作为不好的征兆而值得关注。 来自互联网

27 aggregate   

adj.总计的，集合的；n.总数；v.合计；集合

参考例句：

• The football team had a low goal aggregate last season.这支足球队上个赛季的进球总数很少。
• The money collected will aggregate a thousand dollars.进帐总额将达一千美元。

28 bullion   

n.金条，银条

参考例句：

• In the London bullion market yesterday,the price of gold was steady.昨天伦敦金银市场黄金价格稳定。
• Police have launched a man-hunt for the bullion robbers.警方已大举搜捕抢劫金条的罪犯。

29 puffing   

v.使喷出( puff的现在分词 )；喷着汽（或烟）移动；吹嘘；吹捧

参考例句：

• He was puffing hard when he jumped on to the bus. 他跳上公共汽车时喘息不已。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
• My father sat puffing contentedly on his pipe. 父亲坐着心满意足地抽着烟斗。 来自《简明英汉词典》

30 hush   

int.嘘，别出声；n.沉默，静寂；v.使安静

参考例句：

• A hush fell over the onlookers.旁观者们突然静了下来。
• Do hush up the scandal!不要把这丑事声张出去！

31 repentant   

adj.对…感到悔恨的

参考例句：

• He was repentant when he saw what he'd done.他看到自己的作为，心里悔恨。
• I'll be meek under their coldness and repentant of my evil ways.我愿意乖乖地忍受她们的奚落，忏悔我过去的恶行。

32 sobs   

啜泣（声），呜咽（声）( sob的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• She was struggling to suppress her sobs. 她拼命不让自己哭出来。
• She burst into a convulsive sobs. 她突然抽泣起来。