[94]
I scouted5 the notion; ‘Why, she’s quite old,’ I said. (She must have seen some five-and-twenty summers.)
‘Of course she is,’ replied Edward scornfully. ‘It’s not her, it’s her money he’s after, you bet!’
‘Didn’t know she had any money,’ I observed timidly.
‘Sure to have,’ said my brother with confidence. ‘Heaps and heaps.’
Silence ensued, both our minds being busy with the new situation thus presented: mine, in wonderment at this flaw that so often declared itself in enviable natures of fullest endowment,—in a grown-up man and a good cricketer, for instance, even as this curate; Edward’s (apparently) in the consideration of how such a state of things, supposing it existed, could be best turned to his own advantage.
‘Bobby Ferris told me,’ began Edward in due course, ‘that there was a fellow spooning his sister once——’
‘What’s spooning?’ I asked meekly6.
‘O I dunno,’ said Edward indifferently.[95] ‘It’s—it’s—it’s just a thing they do, you know. And he used to carry notes and messages and things between ’em, and he got a shilling almost every time.’
‘What, from each of ’em?’ I innocently inquired.
Edward looked at me with scornful pity. ‘Girls never have any money,’ he briefly7 explained. ‘But she did his exercises, and got him out of rows, and told stories for him when he needed it—and much better ones than he could have made up for himself. Girls are useful in some ways. So he was living in clover, when unfortunately they went and quarrelled about something.’
‘Don’t see what that’s got to do with it,’ I said.
‘Nor don’t I,’ rejoined Edward. ‘But any how the notes and things stopped, and so did the shillings. Bobby was fairly cornered, for he had bought two ferrets on tick, and promised to pay a shilling a week, thinking the shillings were going on for ever, the silly young ass8. So when the week was up, and he was being[96] dunned for the shilling, he went off to the fellow and said: “Your broken-hearted Bella implores9 you to meet her at sundown. By the hollow oak as of old, be it only for a moment. Do not fail!” He got all that out of some rotten book, of course. The fellow looked puzzled and said:
‘“What hollow oak? I don’t know any hollow oak.”
‘“Perhaps it was the Royal Oak?” said Bobby promptly10, ’cos he saw he had made a slip, through trusting too much to the rotten book; but this didn’t seem to make the fellow any happier.’
‘Should think not,’ I said, ‘the Royal Oak’s an awful low sort of pub.’
‘I know,’ said Edward. ‘Well, at last the fellow said, “I think I know what she means: the hollow tree in your father’s paddock. It happens to be an elm, but she wouldn’t know the difference. All right: say I’ll be there.” Bobby hung about a bit, for he hadn’t got his money. “She was crying awfully,” he said. Then he got his shilling.
[97]
‘And wasn’t the fellow riled,’ I inquired, ‘when he got to the place and found nothing?’
‘He found Bobby,’ said Edward indignantly. ‘Young Ferris was a gentleman, every inch of him. He brought the fellow another message from Bella: “I dare not leave the house. My cruel parents immure11 me closely. If you only knew what I suffer. Your broken-hearted Bella.” Out of the same rotten book. This made the fellow a little suspicious, ’cos it was the old Ferrises who had been keen about the thing all through. The fellow, you see, had tin.’
‘But what’s that got to——’ I began again.
‘O I dunno,’ said Edward impatiently. ‘I’m telling you just what Bobby told me. He got suspicious, anyhow, but he couldn’t exactly call Bella’s brother a liar12, so Bobby escaped for the time. But when he was in a hole next week, over a stiff French exercise, and tried the same sort of game on his sister, she was too sharp for him, and he got caught out. Somehow women seem more mistrustful than men. They’re so beastly suspicious by nature, you know.’
[98]
‘I know,’ said I. ‘But did the two—the fellow and the sister—make it up afterwards?’
‘I don’t remember about that,’ replied Edward indifferently; ‘but Bobby got packed off to school a whole year earlier than his people meant to send him. Which was just what he wanted. So you see it all came right in the end!’
I was trying to puzzle out the moral of this story—it was evidently meant to contain one somewhere—when a flood of golden lamplight mingled13 with the moon-rays on the lawn, and Aunt Maria and the new curate strolled out on the grass below us, and took the direction of a garden-seat which was backed by a dense14 laurel shrubbery reaching round in a half-circle to the house. Edward meditated15 moodily16. ‘If we only knew what they were talking about,’ said he, ‘you’d soon see whether I was right or not. Look here! Let’s send the kid down by the porch to reconnoitre!’
‘Harold’s asleep,’ I said; ‘it seems rather a shame——’
‘O rot!’ said my brother; ‘he’s the youngest, and he’s got to do as he’s told!’
[99]
So the luckless Harold was hauled out of bed and given his sailing-orders. He was naturally rather vexed17 at being stood up suddenly on the cold floor, and the job had no particular interest for him; but he was both staunch and well disciplined. The means of exit were simple enough. A porch of iron trellis came up to within easy reach of the window, and was habitually18 used by all three of us, when modestly anxious to avoid public notice. Harold climbed deftly19 down the porch like a white rat, and his night-gown glimmered20 a moment on the gravel21 walk ere he was lost to sight in the darkness of the shrubbery. A brief interval22 of silence ensued; broken suddenly by a sound of scuffle, and then a shrill23 long-drawn squeal24, as of metallic25 surfaces in friction26. Our scout4 had fallen into the hands of the enemy!
Indolence alone had made us devolve the task of investigation27 on our younger brother. Now that danger had declared itself, there was no hesitation28. In a second we were down the side of the porch, and crawling Cherokee-wise through the laurels29 to the back of the garden-seat.[100] Piteous was the sight that greeted us. Aunt Maria was on the seat, in a white evening frock, looking—for an aunt—really quite nice. On the lawn stood an incensed30 curate, grasping our small brother by a large ear, which—judging from the row he was making—seemed on the point of parting company with the head it completed and adorned31. The gruesome noise he was emitting did not really affect us otherwise than ?sthetically. To one who has tried both, the wail32 of genuine physical anguish33 is easily distinguishable from the pumped-up ad misericordiam blubber. Harold’s could clearly be recognised as belonging to the latter class. ‘Now you young—’ (whelp, I think it was, but Edward stoutly34 maintains it was devil), said the curate sternly; ‘tell us what you mean by it!’
‘Well leggo of my ear then!’ shrilled35 Harold, ‘and I’ll tell you the solemn truth!’
‘Very well,’ agreed the curate, releasing him, ‘now go ahead, and don’t lie more than you can help.’
We abode36 the promised disclosure without the least misgiving37; but even we had hardly[101] given Harold due credit for his fertility of resource and powers of imagination.
‘I had just finished saying my prayers,’ began that young gentleman slowly, ‘when I happened to look out of the window, and on the lawn I saw a sight which froze the marrow38 in my veins39! A burglar was approaching the house with snake-like tread! He had a scowl40 and a dark lantern, and he was armed to the teeth!’
We listened with interest. The style, though unlike Harold’s native notes, seemed strangely familiar.
‘Go on,’ said the curate grimly.
‘Pausing in his stealthy career,’ continued Harold, ‘he gave a low whistle. Instantly the signal was responded to, and from the adjacent shadows two more figures glided41 forth42. The miscreants43 were both armed to the teeth.’
‘Excellent,’ said the curate; ‘proceed.’
‘The robber chief,’ pursued Harold, warming to his work, ‘joined his nefarious44 comrades, and conversed45 with them in silent tones. His expression was truly ferocious46, and I ought to have said that he was armed to the t——’
[102]
‘There, never mind his teeth,’ interrupted the curate rudely; ‘there’s too much jaw47 about you altogether. Hurry up and have done.’
‘I was in a frightful48 funk,’ continued the narrator, warily49 guarding his ear with his hand, ‘but just then the drawing-room window opened, and you and Aunt Maria came out—I mean emerged. The burglars vanished silently into the laurels, with horrid50 implications!’
The curate looked slightly puzzled. The tale was well sustained, and certainly circumstantial. After all, the boy might really have seen something. How was the poor man to know—though the chaste51 and lofty diction might have supplied a hint—that the whole yarn52 was a free adaptation from the last Penny Dreadful lent us by the knife-and-boot boy?
‘Why did you not alarm the house?’ he asked.
‘Cos I was afraid,’ said Harold sweetly, ‘that p’raps they mightn’t believe me!’
‘But how did you get down here, you naughty little boy?’ put in Aunt Maria.
Harold was hard pressed—by his own flesh and blood, too!
[103]
At that moment Edward touched me on the shoulder and glided off through the laurels. When some ten yards away he gave a low whistle. I replied with another. The effect was magical. Aunt Maria started up with a shriek53. Harold gave one startled glance around, and then fled like a hare, made straight for the back-door, burst in upon the servants at supper, and buried himself in the broad bosom54 of the cook, his special ally. The curate faced the laurels—hesitatingly. But Aunt Maria flung herself on him. ‘O Mr. Hodgitts!’ I heard her cry, ‘you are brave! for my sake do not be rash!’ He was not rash. When I peeped out a second later, the coast was entirely55 clear.
By this time there were sounds of a household timidly emerging; and Edward remarked to me that perhaps we had better be off. Retreat was an easy matter. A stunted56 laurel gave a leg-up on to the garden wall, which led in its turn to the roof of an out-house, up which, at a dubious57 angle, we could crawl to the window of the box-room. This overland route had been revealed to us one day by the domestic cat,[104] when hard pressed in the course of an otter-hunt, in which the cat—somewhat unwillingly—was filling the title r?le; and it had proved distinctly useful on occasions like the present. We were snug58 in bed—minus some cuticle59 from knees and elbows—and Harold, sleepily chewing something sticky, had been carried up in the arms of the friendly cook, ere the clamour of the burglar-hunters had died away.
The curate’s undaunted demeanour, as reported by Aunt Maria, was generally supposed to have terrified the burglars into flight, and much kudos60 accrued61 to him thereby62. Some days later, however, when he had dropped in to afternoon tea, and was making a mild curatorial joke about the moral courage required for taking the last piece of bread-and-butter, I felt constrained63 to remark dreamily, and as it were to the universe at large: ‘Mr. Hodgitts! you are brave! for my sake, do not be rash!’
Fortunately for me, the vicar also was a caller on that day; and it was always a comparatively easy matter to dodge64 my long-coated friend in the open.
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1
jocund
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| adj.快乐的，高兴的 | |
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2
foe
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| n.敌人，仇敌 | |
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3
discordant
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| adj.不调和的 | |
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4
scout
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| n.童子军，侦察员；v.侦察，搜索 | |
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5
scouted
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| 寻找，侦察( scout的过去式和过去分词 )； 物色（优秀运动员、演员、音乐家等） | |
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6
meekly
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| adv.温顺地，逆来顺受地 | |
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7
briefly
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| adv.简单地，简短地 | |
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8
ass
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| n.驴；傻瓜，蠢笨的人 | |
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9
implores
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| 恳求或乞求（某人）( implore的第三人称单数 ) | |
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10
promptly
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| adv.及时地，敏捷地 | |
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11
immure
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| v.囚禁，幽禁 | |
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12
liar
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| n.说谎的人 | |
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13
mingled
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| 混合，混入( mingle的过去式和过去分词 )； 混进，与…交往[联系] | |
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14
dense
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| a.密集的，稠密的，浓密的；密度大的 | |
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15
meditated
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| 深思，沉思，冥想( meditate的过去式和过去分词 )； 内心策划，考虑 | |
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16
moodily
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| adv.喜怒无常地；情绪多变地；心情不稳地；易生气地 | |
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17
vexed
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| adj.争论不休的；（指问题等）棘手的；争论不休的问题；烦恼的v.使烦恼( vex的过去式和过去分词 )；使苦恼；使生气；详细讨论 | |
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18
habitually
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| ad.习惯地，通常地 | |
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19
deftly
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| adv.灵巧地，熟练地，敏捷地 | |
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20
glimmered
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| v.发闪光，发微光( glimmer的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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21
gravel
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| n.砂跞；砂砾层；结石 | |
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22
interval
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| n.间隔，间距；幕间休息，中场休息 | |
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23
shrill
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| adj.尖声的；刺耳的；v尖叫 | |
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24
squeal
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| v.发出长而尖的声音；n.长而尖的声音 | |
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25
metallic
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| adj.金属的；金属制的；含金属的；产金属的；像金属的 | |
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26
friction
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| n.摩擦，摩擦力 | |
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27
investigation
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| n.调查，调查研究 | |
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28
hesitation
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| n.犹豫，踌躇 | |
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29
laurels
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| n.桂冠，荣誉 | |
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30
incensed
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| 盛怒的 | |
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31
adorned
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| [计]被修饰的 | |
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32
wail
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| vt./vi.大声哀号，恸哭；呼啸，尖啸 | |
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33
anguish
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| n.(尤指心灵上的)极度痛苦，烦恼 | |
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34
stoutly
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| adv.牢固地，粗壮的 | |
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35
shrilled
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| （声音）尖锐的，刺耳的，高频率的( shrill的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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36
abode
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| n.住处，住所 | |
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37
misgiving
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| n.疑虑，担忧，害怕 | |
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38
marrow
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| n.骨髓；精华；活力 | |
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39
veins
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| n.纹理；矿脉( vein的名词复数 )；静脉；叶脉；纹理 | |
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40
scowl
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| vi.(at)生气地皱眉，沉下脸，怒视；n.怒容 | |
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41
glided
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| v.滑动( glide的过去式和过去分词 )；掠过；（鸟或飞机 ） 滑翔 | |
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42
forth
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| adv.向前；向外，往外 | |
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43
miscreants
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| n.恶棍，歹徒( miscreant的名词复数 ) | |
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44
nefarious
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| adj.恶毒的，极坏的 | |
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45
conversed
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| v.交谈，谈话( converse的过去式 ) | |
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46
ferocious
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| adj.凶猛的，残暴的，极度的，十分强烈的 | |
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47
jaw
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| n.颚，颌，说教，流言蜚语；v.喋喋不休，教训 | |
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48
frightful
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| adj.可怕的；讨厌的 | |
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49
warily
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| adv.留心地 | |
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50
horrid
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| adj.可怕的；令人惊恐的；恐怖的；极讨厌的 | |
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51
chaste
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| adj.贞洁的；有道德的；善良的；简朴的 | |
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52
yarn
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| n.纱，纱线，纺线；奇闻漫谈，旅行轶事 | |
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53
shriek
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| v./n.尖叫，叫喊 | |
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54
bosom
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| n.胸，胸部；胸怀；内心；adj.亲密的 | |
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55
entirely
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| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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56
stunted
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| adj.矮小的；发育迟缓的 | |
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57
dubious
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| adj.怀疑的，无把握的；有问题的，靠不住的 | |
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58
snug
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| adj.温暖舒适的，合身的，安全的；v.使整洁干净，舒适地依靠，紧贴；n.（英）酒吧里的私房 | |
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59
cuticle
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| n.表皮 | |
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60
kudos
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| n.荣誉，名声 | |
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61
accrued
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| adj.权责已发生的v.增加( accrue的过去式和过去分词 )；（通过自然增长）产生；获得；（使钱款、债务）积累 | |
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62
thereby
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| adv.因此，从而 | |
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63
constrained
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| adj.束缚的,节制的 | |
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64
dodge
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| v.闪开，躲开，避开；n.妙计，诡计 | |
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