But I gather as the result of some research that it is a species of provender2, and that it is purchased and consumed by the American masses in pretty much the same spirit and on pretty well the same occasions that the common Cockney of our own happy British Islands purchases and devours3 barcelonas and whelks. In other words, a pea-nut is an inevitable4 concomitant of a lower-class American holiday. It is always with them. It is the one article that you may depend upon obtaining not only at every American dry goods store, but at every street-fair, park, beach, and entertainment ground throughout the country. It is a comestible beloved of old and young alike, and when the American boy or girl’s mouth is not at work on chewing gum it is working overtime5 on pea-nuts.
When a working-class American wants a holiday—and sometimes when he would rather stay at home—he sets out[72] with his wife and family for the nearest park. In England, of course, a park means, for the working classes at any rate, a somewhat decorous and over-laid-out open space where there is a band-stand, a range of concrete promenades6, a Swiss chalet where bad tea is provided, a policeman, and a number of hard seats. In America, however, the park is an entirely7 different affair. It is always a place in which you can buy pea-nuts. Not only so; it is a place in which the benevolent8 American entrepreneurs throw together aggregations9 of “attractions” such as are to be seen nowhere else on sea or land. I find, for example, that for Cream City Park, Lyons, Ill., the following amusement devices are to be provided during this present summer:—
“Old Mill, Merry-Go-Rounds, Penny Arcade10, Circular Swing, Cave of the Winds, Billiard and Pool Parlours, Jap Ping-Pong Parlour, Cane11 Rack, Baby Rack, Illusion Shows, Baby Incubator, Pony12 Track, Razzle-Dazzle, and ‘other novelties.’ There are also to be Japanese Tea Gardens, Ice Cream Stands, Soft Drink Stands, Candy and Pop Corn Stands, and facilities for the sale of pea-nuts.”
Another of these parks at Aldoc Beach, near Buffalo13, is described as[73] “running seven days a week” and as possessing “the most magnificent Pine Grove14 and Great Lake,” together with “a $100,000 Summer Hotel, a $15,000 Figure Eight, a $5,000 Rustic15 Vaudeville16 Theatre, and a $5,000 Dance Pavilion,” in addition to a Blinding Array of Restaurants, Chubbuck Wheels, Houses of Mirth, Box-Ball Alleys17, Shooting Galleries, Circle Swings, and Stands for the sale of Soft Drinks, Tobaccos, Sandwiches, Ice Creams, Frankfurters—and pea-nuts.
There are literally18 thousands of these parks scattered19 throughout the United States, and at all and each of them roaring provision is made for the people’s enjoyment20. Compared with our English parks, with their sad, uncertain County Council bands, they fire the imagination. Practically they represent the old English fair—which the drab English authorities have so ruthlessly stamped out—very much modernised, Americanised, and “notionised.” Here the pea-nut reigns21 supreme22. You chew it on the Razzle-Dazzle and in the Baby Rack and the Old Mill and the House of Mirth and the Chubbuck Wheel, and even in the $15,000 Figure Eight and the $5,000 Rustic Vaudeville. It is pea-nuts, pea-nuts, pea-nuts all the time, and nobody hopes, and nobody[74] has the least desire to get away from them—from pea-nuts.
Now, as the parks are open throughout the year and run seven days a week, and are all situated23 within easy distance of large centres of population, it follows that the consumption of pea-nuts in America is something enormous. If the yearly supply were to be put into trucks and looped up into a procession, it would probably take that procession 368 days to pass a given point.
The big fact that I wish to bring out is that the Americans are a pea-nut-fed nation. With this simple statement it is possible to account for a great deal that is otherwise inexplicable24 in the American genius and character.
Nut-chewing is a habit which has been in vogue25 on the earth for an incredible period. Originally developed by the Simian26 races, it was at one time the only known dietetic habit that did not involve bloodshed. It fell into neglect in Europe with the coming of the white man, and throughout the dark ages which ensued nobody appears to have given it a thought. It remained for the genius of America to revive it, and there can be no doubt that the renascence has been brought about in a thoroughly27 adequate and successful manner.
For, as I have shown, all America[75] now chews pea-nuts. As the result, they are a square-jawed, massy-faced race, martyrs28 to dyspepsia, fussy29 in the matter of appetite, and indiscriminate in the general selection of viands30, their staples31 under this head consisting of fat pork and beans, corn mush and jungle-canned beef. Moreover, by dint32 of the assiduous and long-continued absorption of pea-nuts, they have acquired what may be reasonably termed a pea-nut mind.
If you can imagine the vast hordes33 of the original nut-chewers of antiquity34 suddenly set down in the midst of the machinery35 and advantages of twentieth-century civilisation36, and imagine what they would proceed to do in the circumstances, you have gone a great way towards a true conception of the American people as they really are. Their habits and manners and aspirations37 and desires appear in effect to be based entirely on nut-chewing, which, as every naturalist38 is aware, tends to render the chewer acquisitive, cute, tricksome, not given to reflection, tough and nimble of body, and reasonably devoid39 of soul. The habit carries with it, also, an innate40 love of what is noisy and showy, and a vanity which passes ordinary human understanding. It is all based on the desire to dazzle.
So long as America has parks, so long[76] will she chew pea-nuts, and so long as she chews pea-nuts, so long will she continue to remain as artlessly, amazingly and convincingly American as she is at the present moment. To take a few pertinent41 instances, you will find that all American oratory42 is simply and solely43 pea-nut oratory. I append an extract from a speech delivered at the New York Board of Aldermen by a representative from the Borough44 of Brooklyn, as reported in an American paper:—
“I demand this ordinance45 to your attention fer the sake of humanity and fer the cause of freedom. Has introduced two ordinances46 on this subject before, and now I am submittin’ this Bill instead of them two. Maybe I don’t know nuthin’ about how things is over here on this side of the bridge, but I know just how it is in Brooklyn. An’ I wanter tell you that them motormen over in Brooklyn is grinded under the heels of their masters just as the slaves was drove in the olden times by his masters, an’ it’s time fer us to interfere47 in this here matter now.
“Now you may want to know why them motormen don’t come over here and speak up to you for their rights. If the is suffering such outrages48 as this, you asks, why don’t they come here and tell us that they is sufferin’ and ast us to life the yoke49 from offen them?
[77]
“I’ll tell yer why they don’t come. They dasn’t. That’s why.
“They’re afraid, because they’re slaves and dasn’t speak up fer themselves. If they was to come over here and say to this committee, ‘We want you to protect us in our rights for the reason that we’re sufferin’ and frozing in the winter,’ what would happen?
“Why, before them men got through speakin’ their names would be taken and telegraphed to their masters, and when they got back to their cars them masters would tell them they hadn’t no more use for ’em no more furever.”
Herein surely one may trace the effects of pea-nuts as easily as white paint can be seen on a negro.
Now let us turn to a sample of English “as she is wrote” and apparently50 spoken by the American who can read:—
The story about that fisherman wasn’t so bad. He was an old guy, and so poor he had a hard time getting three squares a day, and he had a wife and three kids to support. For some reason too deep for your uncle, he had a rule to pitch his nets in the sea only four times a day. One morning he went out fishing before daylight, and the first drag he made, he copped out a dead donkey. That made him pretty sore. Dead donks were a frost, and he was out one throw. He win out a lot of mud, the next throw, and he was sick, and he makes a howl about fortune.
[78]
“Here I am,” says he, “hustling all day long and every day in the week; I got no other graft51 but this; and yet as hard as I wrestle52 I can’t pay rent. A poor man has no chance. The smooth guys get all the tapioca, and the honest citizen nit.”
Then he throws again, and finds another gold brick—stones, shells, and stuff. I guess he was pretty wild when he sees that. Three throws to the bad and nairy fish.
When the sun came over the hill, he flopped53 down on his knees and prayed like all good Mussulmens, and after that gave the Lord another song.
English of this description runs very badly to pea-nut. It is distorted and degraded and entirely ungrammatical. Yet no one will deny that, if it is not commonly written, it is at least commonly spoken, even in such centres as New York and Boston. To American ears and eyes there is nothing about it that can be quarrelled with. Every American knows what is meant by “guys,” “tapioca,” “nit,” “gold-brick,” “nairy,” “squares,” “hot-air,” and so forth54; and he uses these and similarly squalid words and phrases in his daily speech and conversation. If you were to tell him that such a sentence as “he win out a lot of mud, the next throw” was grammatically unsound and impossible, he would ask you please to be[79] so kind “as not to pull his leg.” He is mentally incapable55 of distinguishing the kind of muss I have quoted from writing of a correct order, and when it creeps into his newspapers, and fictional56 publications, as it is continually doing, he never as much as suspects that there is anything wrong.
Such a pea-nutty view of language points its own moral. It is a view that is universal among Americans, and it can be proved to obtain even among the best of American authors, who habitually57 use some of the crudest Americanisms without knowing it.
I need scarcely add that the pea-nut flavour predominates in most American affairs. The advertising58 of the country is done wholly on pea-nut principles, its politics are run on pea-nut lines, and its professional men and financiers indulge in every species of pea-nut methods. No doubt one should be charitable enough to refrain from blaming them for it. They are to the manner born, and the pea-nut idiosyncracy is so firmly implanted in their natures that it would be impossible for them to shake it out, even if they tried. So that they go on pea-nutting and pea-nutting from generation to generation, and in spite of the extraordinary number of colleges, free schools, reading clubs, and general[80] facilities for culture, they remain clear pea-nut right through.
As I do not happen to wish them any particular harm, I shall express the pious59 hope that they will long continue to pea-nut.
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1
haziest
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| 有薄雾的( hazy的最高级 )； 模糊的； 不清楚的； 糊涂的 | |
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provender
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| n.刍草；秣料 | |
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devours
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| 吞没( devour的第三人称单数 )； 耗尽； 津津有味地看； 狼吞虎咽地吃光 | |
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inevitable
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| adj.不可避免的，必然发生的 | |
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5
overtime
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| adj.超时的，加班的；adv.加班地 | |
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6
promenades
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| n.人行道( promenade的名词复数 )；散步场所；闲逛v.兜风( promenade的第三人称单数 ) | |
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entirely
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| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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benevolent
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| adj.仁慈的，乐善好施的 | |
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aggregations
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| n.聚集( aggregation的名词复数 )；集成；集结；聚集体 | |
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arcade
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| n.拱廊；(一侧或两侧有商店的)通道 | |
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cane
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| n.手杖，细长的茎，藤条；v.以杖击，以藤编制的 | |
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12
pony
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| adj.小型的；n.小马 | |
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13
buffalo
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| n.(北美)野牛；(亚洲)水牛 | |
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14
grove
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| n.林子，小树林，园林 | |
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15
rustic
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| adj.乡村的，有乡村特色的；n.乡下人，乡巴佬 | |
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16
vaudeville
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| n.歌舞杂耍表演 | |
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17
alleys
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| 胡同，小巷( alley的名词复数 )； 小径 | |
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literally
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| adv.照字面意义，逐字地；确实 | |
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19
scattered
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| adj.分散的，稀疏的；散步的；疏疏落落的 | |
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enjoyment
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| n.乐趣；享有；享用 | |
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21
reigns
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| n.君主的统治( reign的名词复数 )；君主统治时期；任期；当政期 | |
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22
supreme
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| adj.极度的，最重要的；至高的，最高的 | |
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23
situated
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| adj.坐落在...的，处于某种境地的 | |
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inexplicable
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| adj.无法解释的，难理解的 | |
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25
Vogue
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| n.时髦，时尚；adj.流行的 | |
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simian
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| adj.似猿猴的；n.类人猿，猴 | |
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thoroughly
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| adv.完全地，彻底地，十足地 | |
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28
martyrs
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| n.martyr的复数形式；烈士( martyr的名词复数 )；殉道者；殉教者；乞怜者（向人诉苦以博取同情） | |
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fussy
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| adj.为琐事担忧的，过分装饰的，爱挑剔的 | |
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30
viands
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| n.食品，食物 | |
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31
staples
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| n.（某国的）主要产品( staple的名词复数 )；钉书钉；U 形钉；主要部份v.用钉书钉钉住( staple的第三人称单数 ) | |
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32
dint
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| n.由于，靠；凹坑 | |
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hordes
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| n.移动着的一大群( horde的名词复数 )；部落 | |
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34
antiquity
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| n.古老；高龄；古物，古迹 | |
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35
machinery
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| n.(总称)机械，机器；机构 | |
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civilisation
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| n.文明，文化，开化，教化 | |
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aspirations
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| 强烈的愿望( aspiration的名词复数 )； 志向； 发送气音； 发 h 音 | |
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naturalist
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| n.博物学家(尤指直接观察动植物者) | |
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39
devoid
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| adj.全无的，缺乏的 | |
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40
innate
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| adj.天生的，固有的，天赋的 | |
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41
pertinent
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| adj.恰当的；贴切的；中肯的；有关的；相干的 | |
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42
oratory
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| n.演讲术；词藻华丽的言辞 | |
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43
solely
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| adv.仅仅，唯一地 | |
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44
borough
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| n.享有自治权的市镇；(英)自治市镇 | |
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45
ordinance
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| n.法令；条令；条例 | |
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46
ordinances
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| n.条例，法令( ordinance的名词复数 ) | |
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47
interfere
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| v.(in)干涉，干预；(with)妨碍，打扰 | |
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48
outrages
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| 引起…的义愤，激怒( outrage的第三人称单数 ) | |
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49
yoke
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| n.轭；支配；v.给...上轭，连接，使成配偶 | |
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50
apparently
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| adv.显然地；表面上，似乎 | |
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51
graft
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| n.移植，嫁接，艰苦工作，贪污；v.移植，嫁接 | |
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52
wrestle
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| vi.摔跤，角力；搏斗；全力对付 | |
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53
flopped
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| v.（指书、戏剧等）彻底失败( flop的过去式和过去分词 )；（因疲惫而）猛然坐下；（笨拙地、不由自主地或松弛地）移动或落下；砸锅 | |
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54
forth
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| adv.向前；向外，往外 | |
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55
incapable
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| adj.无能力的，不能做某事的 | |
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56
fictional
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| adj.小说的，虚构的 | |
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57
habitually
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| ad.习惯地，通常地 | |
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58
advertising
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| n.广告业；广告活动 a.广告的；广告业务的 | |
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59
pious
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| adj.虔诚的；道貌岸然的 | |
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