I recall the gist6 of his first speech: "We are now, young ladies, about to study one of the most necessary and the most serious of arts, the art of dancing. It is the art of dancing that makes ladies and gentlemen of us all. In a ball-room the awkward, those who cannot dance, are in disgrace. Nobody minds them, nobody admires them. They have not the tone of society. They are poor creatures, who, for all society cares, might never have been born. What it behoves you, young ladies, is to acquire the tone of society from your earliest years, and it is only by a steady practice of the art of dancing that you may hope to acquire it. Practice, young ladies, makes perfect—remember that."
Ever afterwards, his first question, before beginning each week's lesson, was: "What does practice do, young ladies?" and we were all expected to reply in a single ringing voice: "Makes perfect, Mr. Parker." Children are heartless satirists, and the follies7 of poor little Mr. Parker filled us with wicked glee.
I see him still, unconscious tiny clown, gathering8 up in a delicate grasp the tails of his black coat to show us how a lady curtseyed in the remote days of Queen Anne. And mincing9 across the polished floor, he would say, as he daintily picked his steps: "The lady enters the ball-room on the tip of her toes—so!" Picture, I pray you, the comic appearance of any woman who dared to enter a ball-room as Mr. Parker walked across our dancing-hall! Society would stand still to gape10. He minced11 to right, he minced to left, he minced in and out of the five positions, and then with eyes ecstatically closed, he would seize his violin, and play the homely12 air of "Nora Creina," as he chasséed up and down the floor for our delectation, singing the while—
"Bend and rise-a—Nora Creina,
Rise on your toes-a—Nora Creina,
Chassez to the right-a—Nora Creina,
And then to the left-a—Nora Creina."
In his least inspired moments, he addressed us in the first position; but whenever he soared aloft on the wings of imagination, he stood in the glory of the fifth. In that position he never failed to recite to us the imposing13 tale of his successes in the "reception halls" of the Duchess of Leamington and the Marchioness of Stoke. Once he went so far as to exhibit to us a new dance he had composed expressly for his illustrious friend the duchess.
"My dears, that dance will be all the rage next spring in London, you will see."
He was quite aware that we never would see, having nothing on earth to do with the London season. But the assertion mystified us, and enchanted14 him.
"Thus my hand lightly reposes15 on the waist of her Grace, her fingers just touch my shoulders, and, one, two, three—boom!" he was gliding16 round the room, clasping lightly an imaginary duchess in his arms, in beatific17 unconsciousness of the exquisite18 absurdity19 of his appearance and action, and we children followed his circumvolutions with glances magnified and brightened by mirth and wonderment.
The irresistible20 Mr. Parker had a knavish21 trick of keeping us on our good behaviour by a delusive22 promise persistently23 unfulfilled. Every Tuesday, after saluting24 us in the fashion of the eighteenth century and demanding from us an immense simultaneous curtsey of Queen Anne, holding our skirts in an extravagant25 semicircle and trailing our little bent26 bodies backward and upward upon the most pointed27 of toes, he would rap the table with his bow, clear his throat, adjust his white tie, straighten himself, and, with a hideous28 grin he doubtless deemed captivating, he would address us inclusively—
"Young ladies, it is my intention to bring you a little confectionery next Tuesday; and now, if you please, attention! and answer. What does practice do?"
In vain we shouted our customary response with more than our customary conviction; the confectionery was always for next Tuesday, and never, alas29! for to-day. With longing30 eyes we watched the slightest movement of the master towards his pocket. He never produced anything but his handkerchief, and when he doubled in two to wish us "O reevoyer," he never omitted to say—
"To-day I did not pass by the confectioner's shop; but it will certainly be for next Tuesday."
For a long time he took us in, as other so-called magicians have taken in simpletons as great as we. We believed he had a secret understanding with the devil, for only to the power of evil could we attribute a quickness of apprehension31 such as he boasted. He would stand with his back to us, playing away at his violin, while we chasséed and croiséd and heaven knows what else—
"Now, my senses are so acutely alive to the impropriety of a false step, young ladies, that even with my back turned to you, I shall be able to tell which of you has erred32 without seeing her."
Sure enough he always pounced33 on the bungler34, and never failed to switch round his bow violently and hit her toes. How was it done? Simply enough, one of us discovered quite by accident. There was a big mahogany press, as finely polished as a mirror, and in front of this the master planted himself. The rows of dancers, from crown to heel, were as clear to him as in a glass. By such simple means may a terrible reputation be acquired. For months had Mr. Parker shabbily usurped35 the fame of a magician.
In his quality of master he could permit himself a brutality36 of candour not usually shown by his sex to us without the strictest limits of intimacy37. There was a big girl of sixteen, very stout38, very tall, squarely built, with poultry-yard writ39 in broad letters over her whole dull and earthly form. An excellent creature, I have no doubt, though I knew nothing whatever about her, being half her age, which in school constitutes a difference of something approaching half a century. Her name was Janet Twycross, and she came from Shakespeare's town. As befits a master of the graceful40 art, Mr. Parker's preference was, given to the slim and lovely nymph, and such a square emblem41 of the soil as Janet Twycross would naturally provoke his impatient contempt. Possibly she merited all the vicious rage he showered on her poor big feet, pathetically evident, emerging from skirts that just reached her ankles. But with my larger experience and knowledge of his sex, I am inclined to doubt it, and attribute his vindictiveness42 to a mere44 masculine hatred45 of ugliness in woman rather than to the teacher's legitimate46 wrath47. Hardly a Tuesday went by but he sent the inoffensive, great, meek48 creature into floods of tears; and while she wept and sobbed49, looking less lovely than ever in her sorrow, he would snarl50 and snicker at her, imitate her jeeringly51, and cast obloquy52 on her unshapely feet.
"A ploughboy would be disgraced by such feet as Miss Twycross's," he would hiss53 across at her, and then rap them wickedly with his bow.
The art of dancing, Mr. Parker proved to us, is insufficient54 to make a gentleman of its adept55. Once his unsleeping fury against the unhappy girl carried him to singular lengths. He bade us all be seated, and then, with his customary inflated56 and foolish air began to address us upon the power of art. With art you can achieve anything, you can even lend grace to the ungraceful.
"I will now chose from your ranks the most awkward, the most pitiable and clumsy of her sex. The young lady unassisted cannot dance a single step; but such is my consummate57 skill, so finished is my art, that I shall actually succeed in bestowing58 some of my own grace as a dancer upon her. Advance, Miss Twycross."
I leave you to picture the sensations of the unfortunate so addressed and so described. She advanced slowly, square and sodden59, but with an unmistakable look of anguish60 in her poor harassed61 eyes, of a blue as dull and troubled as her complexion62; and a certain twitching63 of her thin tight lips was eloquent64 enough of her unprovoked hurt.
Mr. Parker, with his simpering disgusted air of ill-natured little dandy, flourished a perfumed handkerchief about her face, to sustain his affronted65 nerves, no doubt, placed an arm gingerly about the flat square waist, clasped her outer hand in evident revulsion, and began to scamper66 and drag her round the room in the steps of a wild schottische. Most of us tittered—could we be expected to measure the misery67 of the girl, while nature made us excruciatingly alive to the absurdity of her tormentor68?
As a girl myself I have often laughed in recalling the incident; but I own that the brute69 should have been kicked out of the establishment for such an object-lesson in the art of communicating grace. As for his boasted achievement, even we babies could perfectly70 understand that there was not much to choose between his jerky waxwork71 steps and the heavy stamp of his partner. She at least was true to nature and moved as she looked, an honest cow-like creature, whom you were at liberty not to admire, but who offered you no reason to despise her. While he, her vindictive43 enemy, mean unnatural72 little body, sheathing73 a base, affected74, silly little soul, fiddling75 and scraping away his days which were neither dignified76 nor manly77, he offered himself to the unlimited78 contempt of even such microscopic79 humanity as ours. We felt he was not a man with the large capacity of manhood, but a disgraced and laughable thing, a puppet moving upon springs and speaking artificially, manufactured as dolls are, for the delectation of little folk.
We enjoyed Mr. Parker, but we never regarded him as more human than the clown or the harlequin of the pantomime. We imitated him together; we played at him, as we played at soldiers or fairies or social entertainment. Had we learnt that he was dead or ill, or driven to the poorhouse, it would have been just as if we had heard such news of harlequin, or heard that Peeping Tom had fallen from his window and smashed his head. Mr. Parker was not a person at the Ivies80; he was a capital joke.
点击收听单词发音
1 evoked | |
[医]诱发的 | |
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2 grotesque | |
adj.怪诞的,丑陋的;n.怪诞的图案,怪人(物) | |
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3 convened | |
召开( convene的过去式 ); 召集; (为正式会议而)聚集; 集合 | |
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4 agog | |
adj.兴奋的,有强烈兴趣的; adv.渴望地 | |
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5 shriek | |
v./n.尖叫,叫喊 | |
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6 gist | |
n.要旨;梗概 | |
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7 follies | |
罪恶,时事讽刺剧; 愚蠢,蠢笨,愚蠢的行为、思想或做法( folly的名词复数 ) | |
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8 gathering | |
n.集会,聚会,聚集 | |
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9 mincing | |
adj.矫饰的;v.切碎;切碎 | |
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10 gape | |
v.张口,打呵欠,目瞪口呆地凝视 | |
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11 minced | |
v.切碎( mince的过去式和过去分词 );剁碎;绞碎;用绞肉机绞(食物,尤指肉) | |
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12 homely | |
adj.家常的,简朴的;不漂亮的 | |
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13 imposing | |
adj.使人难忘的,壮丽的,堂皇的,雄伟的 | |
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14 enchanted | |
adj. 被施魔法的,陶醉的,入迷的 动词enchant的过去式和过去分词 | |
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15 reposes | |
v.将(手臂等)靠在某人(某物)上( repose的第三人称单数 ) | |
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16 gliding | |
v. 滑翔 adj. 滑动的 | |
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17 beatific | |
adj.快乐的,有福的 | |
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18 exquisite | |
adj.精美的;敏锐的;剧烈的,感觉强烈的 | |
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19 absurdity | |
n.荒谬,愚蠢;谬论 | |
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20 irresistible | |
adj.非常诱人的,无法拒绝的,无法抗拒的 | |
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21 knavish | |
adj.无赖(似)的,不正的;刁诈 | |
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22 delusive | |
adj.欺骗的,妄想的 | |
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23 persistently | |
ad.坚持地;固执地 | |
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24 saluting | |
v.欢迎,致敬( salute的现在分词 );赞扬,赞颂 | |
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25 extravagant | |
adj.奢侈的;过分的;(言行等)放肆的 | |
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26 bent | |
n.爱好,癖好;adj.弯的;决心的,一心的 | |
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27 pointed | |
adj.尖的,直截了当的 | |
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28 hideous | |
adj.丑陋的,可憎的,可怕的,恐怖的 | |
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29 alas | |
int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等) | |
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30 longing | |
n.(for)渴望 | |
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31 apprehension | |
n.理解,领悟;逮捕,拘捕;忧虑 | |
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32 erred | |
犯错误,做错事( err的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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33 pounced | |
v.突然袭击( pounce的过去式和过去分词 );猛扑;一眼看出;抓住机会(进行抨击) | |
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34 Bungler | |
n.笨拙者,经验不够的人 | |
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35 usurped | |
篡夺,霸占( usurp的过去式和过去分词 ); 盗用; 篡夺,篡权 | |
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36 brutality | |
n.野蛮的行为,残忍,野蛮 | |
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37 intimacy | |
n.熟悉,亲密,密切关系,亲昵的言行 | |
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39 writ | |
n.命令状,书面命令 | |
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40 graceful | |
adj.优美的,优雅的;得体的 | |
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41 emblem | |
n.象征,标志;徽章 | |
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42 vindictiveness | |
恶毒;怀恨在心 | |
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43 vindictive | |
adj.有报仇心的,怀恨的,惩罚的 | |
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44 mere | |
adj.纯粹的;仅仅,只不过 | |
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45 hatred | |
n.憎恶,憎恨,仇恨 | |
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46 legitimate | |
adj.合法的,合理的,合乎逻辑的;v.使合法 | |
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47 wrath | |
n.愤怒,愤慨,暴怒 | |
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48 meek | |
adj.温顺的,逆来顺受的 | |
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49 sobbed | |
哭泣,啜泣( sob的过去式和过去分词 ); 哭诉,呜咽地说 | |
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50 snarl | |
v.吼叫,怒骂,纠缠,混乱;n.混乱,缠结,咆哮 | |
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51 jeeringly | |
adv.嘲弄地 | |
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52 obloquy | |
n.斥责,大骂 | |
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53 hiss | |
v.发出嘶嘶声;发嘘声表示不满 | |
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54 insufficient | |
adj.(for,of)不足的,不够的 | |
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55 adept | |
adj.老练的,精通的 | |
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56 inflated | |
adj.(价格)飞涨的;(通货)膨胀的;言过其实的;充了气的v.使充气(于轮胎、气球等)( inflate的过去式和过去分词 );(使)膨胀;(使)通货膨胀;物价上涨 | |
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57 consummate | |
adj.完美的;v.成婚;使完美 [反]baffle | |
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58 bestowing | |
砖窑中砖堆上层已烧透的砖 | |
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59 sodden | |
adj.浑身湿透的;v.使浸透;使呆头呆脑 | |
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60 anguish | |
n.(尤指心灵上的)极度痛苦,烦恼 | |
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61 harassed | |
adj. 疲倦的,厌烦的 动词harass的过去式和过去分词 | |
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62 complexion | |
n.肤色;情况,局面;气质,性格 | |
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63 twitching | |
n.颤搐 | |
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64 eloquent | |
adj.雄辩的,口才流利的;明白显示出的 | |
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65 affronted | |
adj.被侮辱的,被冒犯的v.勇敢地面对( affront的过去式和过去分词 );相遇 | |
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66 scamper | |
v.奔跑,快跑 | |
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67 misery | |
n.痛苦,苦恼,苦难;悲惨的境遇,贫苦 | |
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68 tormentor | |
n. 使苦痛之人, 使苦恼之物, 侧幕 =tormenter | |
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69 brute | |
n.野兽,兽性 | |
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70 perfectly | |
adv.完美地,无可非议地,彻底地 | |
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71 waxwork | |
n.蜡像 | |
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72 unnatural | |
adj.不自然的;反常的 | |
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73 sheathing | |
n.覆盖物,罩子v.将(刀、剑等)插入鞘( sheathe的现在分词 );包,覆盖 | |
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74 affected | |
adj.不自然的,假装的 | |
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75 fiddling | |
微小的 | |
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76 dignified | |
a.可敬的,高贵的 | |
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77 manly | |
adj.有男子气概的;adv.男子般地,果断地 | |
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78 unlimited | |
adj.无限的,不受控制的,无条件的 | |
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79 microscopic | |
adj.微小的,细微的,极小的,显微的 | |
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80 ivies | |
常春藤( ivy的名词复数 ) | |
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