Who? Probably no one knew then, and certainly no one can say now. But it is certain that in the late summer of that year, while the Squire9 sat blinded in his drab-hued room at Garth, and Ovington's hummed with business, and Arthur rode gaily10 to and fro between the two, the thing happened. Some one, some bank, perhaps some great speculator with irons in many fires and many lands, took fright and acted on his fears--but silently, stealthily, as is the manner of such. Or it may have been a manufacturer on a great scale who looked abroad and fancied that he saw, though still a long way off, that bugbear of manufacturers, a glut11.
At any rate there came a check, unmarked by the vast majority, but of which a whisper began to pass round the inner recesses12 of Lombard Street--a fall, such as there had been a few months earlier, but which then had been speedily made good. Aldersbury lay far beyond the warning, or if a hint of it reached Ovington, it did not go beyond him. He did not pass it on, even to Arthur, much less did it reach others. Sir Charles, secluded13 within his park walls, was not in the way of hearing such things, and Acherley and his like were busy with preparations for autumn sport, getting out their guns and seeing that their pink coats were aired and their mahogany tops were brought to the right color. Wolley had his own troubles, and dealt with them after his own reckless fashion, which was to retire one bill by another; he found it all he could do to provide for to-day, without thinking what to-morrow might bring forth14, should his woollen goods become unsaleable, or his bills fail to find discounters. And the multitude, Grounds and Purslow and their followers15, were happy, secure in their ignorance, foreseeing no evil.
This was the state of things at Aldersbury, as summer passed into autumn. Men still added up their investments, and reckoned the amount of their fortunes and chuckled16 over what they had made, and added to the sum what they were sure of making, when the shares of this mine or that canal company rose another five or ten points. Their wealth on paper was still, to them, solid, abiding17 wealth, to be garnered18 and laid by and enjoyed when it pleased them. And trade seemed still to flourish, though not quite so briskly. There was still a demand for goods though not quite so urgent a demand--and the price stuck a little. The railway shares still stood at the high premium19 to which they had risen, though for the moment they did not seem to be inclined to go higher.
But about the end of September--perhaps some one in London or Birmingham or Liverpool had twitched20 the filament which connected it with Aldersbury--Ovington called Arthur back as he was leaving the parlor at the close of the day's business. "Wait a moment," he said, "I want you. I have been thinking things over, lad, and I am not quite comfortable about them."
"Is it Wolley?" Wolley's case had been before them that morning and sharp things had been said about his trading methods.
"No, it's not Wolley." Having got so far Ovington paused, and Arthur noticed that his face was grave. "No, though Wolley is a part of it. I am always uneasy about him. But----"
"What is it, sir?"
"It is the general situation, lad. I don't like it. I've an impression that things have gone farther than they should. There is an amount of inflation that, if things go smoothly21, will be gradually reduced and no harm done. But we have a large sum of money out"--he touched the pile of papers before him--"and I should like to see it lessened22. I hardly know why, but I do not feel that the position is healthy."
"But our money is well covered."
"As things are."
"And we are as solvent23, sir, as----"
"As need be, with the ordinary time to meet the calls that may be made upon us. But in the event of a sudden fall, of one big failure leading to another--in the event of a sudden rush to present our notes?"
"Even then, sir, we are well secured. We should have no difficulty in finding accommodation."
"In ordinary circumstances, no--and if we alone needed it. We could go to A. or B. or C, and there would be no difficulty. We have the money's worth and a good margin25. But if A. and B. and C. were also short, what then, lad?"
Arthur felt something approaching contempt. The banker was inventing bogies, imagining dangers, dreaming of difficulties where none existed. He saw him in a new light, and discovered him to be timorous26. "But that state of things is not likely to occur," he objected.
"Perhaps not, but if it did?"
"Have you had any hint?"
"No. But I see that iron is down--since Saturday. And the Manchester market was flat yesterday."
"Things that have happened before," Arthur said. "I think, sir, it is really Wolley's affair that is troubling you."
"If it ended with Wolley it would be a small matter. No, I am not thinking of that." He looked before him and drummed upon the table with his fingers. "But the positions calls for--caution. We must go no farther. We must be careful how we grant accommodation no matter who applies for it. We must raise our reserve. See, if you please, that we do not discount a single bill without recourse to me--though, of course, you will let nothing be noticed on the other side of the counter."
"Very good," Arthur said. But he thought that the other's caution was running away with him. The sky seemed clear to him--he could discern no sign of a storm, and he did not reflect that, as he had never been present at a storm, the signs might escape him. "Very good," he said, "I'll tell Rodd. I am sure it will please him," and with that tiny sting, he went out.
The conversation had been held behind closed doors, yet it had its effect. A chill seemed to fall upon the bank. The air became less genial27. Ovington's face grew both keen and watchful28. Arthur, perplexed29 and puzzled, was more brusque, his speech shorter. Rodd's face reflected his superiors' gravity. Only Clement30, going about his branch of the work with his usual stolid31 indifference32, perceived no change in the temperature, and, depressed33 before, was only a degree nearer to the mean level.
Poor Clement! There are situations in which it is hard to play the hero, and he found himself in one of them. He had vowed34 that there should be no more meetings and no more love-making until he had faced and conquered his dragon. But meanwhile the dragon lay sick and blind at the bottom of its den24, guarded by its very weakness from attack, while every hour and every day that saw nothing done seemed to remove Clement farther from his mistress, seemed to set a greater distance between them, seemed to blacken his face in her eyes.
Yet what could he do? How could he wrest35 himself from the inaction--it must seem to her the ignoble36 inaction--which pressed upon him? She watched--he pictured her watching from her tower, or more precisely37 from the terraced garden at Garth, for the deliverance which did not come, for the knight38 whose trumpet39 never sounded! She watched, while he, weak and shiftless, hung back in uncertainty40, the inefficient41 he had ever been!
Ay, that he had ever been! It was that which hurt him. It was the sense of that which wasted his spirits as sorely as the impatience42, the fever, of thwarted43 love. The spell of vigor44 which had for a few days lifted him out of himself, and given him the force to meet and to impress his fellows, had not only failed to win any real advantage, but failing, it had left him less self-reliant than before. For he saw now where he had failed. He saw that with the winning-card in his hand he had allowed himself to be defeated by Arthur, and to be jockeyed out of all the fruits of his labor45, simply because he had lacked the moral courage, the hardness of fibre, the stiffness to stand by his own!
And he feared that it would ever be so. Arthur had got the better of him, and the knowledge depressed him to the ground. He was not a man. He was a weakling, a dreamer, good for neither one thing nor another! As useless outside the bank as at his desk, below and not above the daily tasks that he secretly despised.
Yet what could he do? What was it in his power to do? He asked himself that question a hundred times. He could not force himself on the Squire, ill and confined to his bed as he was--and be sure, Arthur did not make the best of his uncle's condition. He could only wait, though to wait was intolerable. He could only wait, while poor Josina first doubted, then despaired! Wait while first hope, and then faith, and in the end love died in her breast! Wait, till she thought herself abandoned!
Of course in his impatience and his humility46 Clement exaggerated both the delay and its results. The days seemed weeks to him, the weeks months. He fancied it a year since he had seen Josina. He did not consider that she was no stranger to his difficulties, nor reflect that though his silence might try her, and his absence cause her unhappiness, she might still approve both the one and the other. As a fact, the lesson which he had taught her at their last meeting had been driven home by the remorse47 that had tortured her on that dreadful night; and lonely hours in the sick room, much watching, and many a thought of what might have been, had strengthened the impression.
But Clement did not know this. He pictured the girl as losing all faith in him, and as the weeks ran on, the time came when he could bear the delay no longer, when he felt that he must either do something, or write himself down a coward. So one day, after hearing in the town that the Squire was able to leave his room, he wrote to Josina. He told her that he should call on the morrow and see her father.
And on the morrow he rode over, blind for once to the changes of nature, of landscape and cloudscape that surrounded him. But he never reached the house, for at the little bridge at the foot of the drive Josina met him, and eager as he had been to see his sweetheart and to hear her voice, he was checked by the change in her. It was a change which went deeper than mere48 physical alteration49, though that, too, was there. The girl was paler, finer, more spiritual. Trouble and anxiety had laid their mark on her. He had left her girl, he found her woman. A new look, a look of purpose, of decision, gave another cast to her features.
She was the first to speak, and her words bore out the change in her. "You must come no farther, Clement," she said. And then as their hands met and their eyes, the color flamed in her cheeks, her head drooped50 flowerlike, she was for an instant the old Josina, the girl he had wooed by the brook51, who had many a time fallen on his breast. But for a moment only. Then, "You cannot see him yet," she announced. "Not yet, for a long time, Clem. I met you here that I might stop you, and that there might be no misunderstanding--and no more secrets."
And this she had certainly secured, for the place which she had chosen for their meeting was overlooked, though at a distance, by the doorway52 of the house, and by all the walks about it.
But he was not to be so put off. "I must see him," he said, and he told himself that he must not be moved by her pleadings. It was natural that she should fear, but he must not fear--and indeed he had passed beyond fear. "No, dear," as she began to protest, "you must let me judge of this." He held her hands firmly as he looked down at her. "I have suffered enough, I have suffered as much as I can bear. I have had no sight of you and no word of you for months, and I cannot endure this longer. Every hour of every day I have felt myself a coward, a deserter, a do-nothing! I have had to bear this, and I have borne it. But now--now that your father is downstairs----"
"You can still do nothing," she said. "Believe, believe me," earnestly, "you can do nothing. Dear Clement," and the tenderness which she strove to suppress betrayed itself in her tone, "you must be guided by me, you must indeed. I am with my father, and I know, I know that he cannot bear it now. I know that it would be cruel to tell him now. He is blind. Blind, Clement! And he trusts me, he has to trust me. To tell him now would be to destroy his faith in me, to shock him and to frighten him--irreparably. You must go back now--now at once."
"What?" he cried. "And do nothing? And lose you?" The pathos53 of her appeal had passed him by, and only his love and his jealousy54 spoke55.
"No," she answered soberly, "you will not lose me, if you have patience."
"But have you patience?"
"I must have."
"And I am to do nothing?" He spoke with energy, almost with anger. "To go on doing nothing? I am to stand by and--and play the coward still--go on playing it?"
Her face quivered, for he hurt her. He was selfish, he was cruel; yet she understood, and loved him for his cruelty. But she answered him firmly. "Nothing until I send for you," she said. "You do not think, Clem. He is blind! He is dependent on me for everything. If I tell him in his weakness that I have deceived him, he will lose faith in me, he will distrust me, he will distrust everyone. He will be alone in his darkness."
It began to come home to him. "Blind?" he repeated.
"Yes."
"But for good? Do you mean--quite blind?"
"Ah, I don't know!" she cried, unable to control her voice. "I don't know. Dr. Farmer does not know, the physician who came from Birmingham to see him does not know. They say that they have hopes--and I don't know! But I fear."
He was silent then, touched with pity, feeling at length the pathos of it, feeling it almost as she felt it. But after a pause, during which she stood watching his face, "And if he does not recover his sight?"
"God forbid!"
"I say God forbid too, with all my heart. Still, if he does not--what then? When may I----"
"When the time comes," she answered, "and of that I must be the judge. Yes, Clement," with resolution. "I must be the judge, for I alone know how he is, and I alone can choose the occasion."
The delay was very bitter to him. He had ridden out determined56 to put. his fate to the test, to let nothing stand between him and his love, to over-ride excuses; and he could not in a moment make up his mind to be thwarted.
"And I must wait? I must go on waiting? Eating my heart out--doing nothing?"
"There is no other way. Indeed, indeed there is not."
"But it is too much. It is too much, Jos, that you ask!"
"Then, Clement----"
"Well?"
"You must give me up." She spoke firmly but her lips quivered, and there were tears in her eyes.
He was silent. At last, "Do you wish me to do that?" he said.
She looked at him for answer, and his doubts, if he had doubted her, his distrust, if it had been possible for him to distrust her, vanished. His heart melted. They were a very simple pair of lovers, moved by simple impulses.
"Forgive me, oh, forgive me, dear!" he cried. "But mine is a hard task, a hard task. You do not know what it is to wait, to wait and to do nothing!"
"Do I not?" Her eyes were swimming. "Is it not that which I am doing every day, Clem? But I have faith in you, and I believe in you. I believe that all will come right in the end. If you trust me, as I trust you, and have to trust you----"
"I will, I will," he cried, repentant57, remorseful58, recognizing in her a new decision, a new sweetheart, and doing homage59 to the strength that trial and suffering had given her. "I will trust you, trust you--and wait!"
Her eyes thanked him, and her hands; and after this there was little more to be said. She was anxious that he should go, and they parted. He rode back to Aldersbury, thinking less of himself and more of her, and something too of the old man, who, blind and shorn of his strength, had now to lean on women, and suspicious by habit must now trust others, whether he would or no. Clement had imagination, and by its light he saw the pathos of the Squire's position; of his helplessness in the midst of the great possessions he had gathered, and the acres that he had added, acre to acre. He who had loved to look on hill and covert60 and know them his own, to whom every copse and hedgerow was a friend, who had watched his marches so jealously and known the rotation61 of every field, must now fume62 and fret63, thinking them neglected, suspecting waste, doubting everyone, lacking but a little of doubting even his daughter.
"Poor chap!" he muttered, "poor old chap!" He was sorry for the Squire, but he was even more sorry for himself. Any other, he felt, would have surmounted64 the obstacles that stopped him, or by one road or another would have gone round them. But he was no good, he was useless. Even his sweetheart--this in a little spirit of bitterness--took the upper hand and guided him and imposed her will on him. He was nothing.
In the bank he grew more taciturn, doing his business with less spirit than before, suspecting Arthur and avoiding speech with him, meeting his careless smile with a stolid face. His father, Rodd too, deemed him jealous of the new partner, and his father, growing in these days a little sharp in temper, spoke to him about it.
"You took no interest in the business," he said, "and I had to find some one who would take an interest and be of use to me. Now you are making difficulties and causing unpleasantness. You are behaving ill, Clement."
But Clement only shrugged65 his shoulders. He had become indifferent. He had his own burden to bear.
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1
misgiving
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| n.疑虑，担忧，害怕 | |
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syllables
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| n.音节( syllable的名词复数 ) | |
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3
secrecy
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| n.秘密，保密，隐蔽 | |
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parlor
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| n.店铺，营业室；会客室，客厅 | |
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filament
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| n.细丝；长丝；灯丝 | |
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alley
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| n.小巷，胡同；小径，小路 | |
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mighty
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| adj.强有力的；巨大的 | |
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impetus
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| n.推动，促进，刺激；推动力 | |
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squire
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| n.护卫, 侍从, 乡绅 | |
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gaily
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| adv.欢乐地，高兴地 | |
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glut
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| n.存货过多，供过于求；v.狼吞虎咽 | |
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recesses
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| n.壁凹( recess的名词复数 )；（工作或业务活动的）中止或暂停期间；学校的课间休息；某物内部的凹形空间v.把某物放在墙壁的凹处( recess的第三人称单数 )；将（墙）做成凹形，在（墙）上做壁龛；休息，休会，休庭 | |
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13
secluded
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| adj.与世隔绝的；隐退的；偏僻的v.使隔开，使隐退( seclude的过去式和过去分词) | |
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forth
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| adv.向前；向外，往外 | |
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followers
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| 追随者( follower的名词复数 )； 用户； 契据的附面； 从动件 | |
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chuckled
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| 轻声地笑( chuckle的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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abiding
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| adj.永久的，持久的，不变的 | |
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garnered
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| v.收集并（通常）贮藏（某物），取得，获得( garner的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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premium
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| n.加付款；赠品；adj.高级的；售价高的 | |
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twitched
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| vt.& vi.（使）抽动，（使）颤动（twitch的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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smoothly
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| adv.平滑地，顺利地，流利地，流畅地 | |
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lessened
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| 减少的，减弱的 | |
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solvent
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| n.溶剂；adj.有偿付能力的 | |
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den
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| n.兽穴；秘密地方；安静的小房间，私室 | |
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margin
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| n.页边空白；差额；余地，余裕；边，边缘 | |
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timorous
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| adj.胆怯的，胆小的 | |
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genial
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| adj.亲切的，和蔼的，愉快的，脾气好的 | |
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watchful
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| adj.注意的，警惕的 | |
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perplexed
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| adj.不知所措的 | |
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clement
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| adj.仁慈的；温和的 | |
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stolid
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| adj.无动于衷的，感情麻木的 | |
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indifference
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| n.不感兴趣，不关心，冷淡，不在乎 | |
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depressed
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| adj.沮丧的，抑郁的，不景气的，萧条的 | |
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vowed
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| 起誓，发誓（vow的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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wrest
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| n.扭，拧，猛夺；v.夺取，猛扭，歪曲 | |
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ignoble
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| adj.不光彩的，卑鄙的；可耻的 | |
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precisely
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| adv.恰好，正好，精确地，细致地 | |
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knight
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| n.骑士，武士；爵士 | |
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trumpet
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| n.喇叭，喇叭声；v.吹喇叭，吹嘘 | |
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uncertainty
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| n.易变，靠不住，不确知，不确定的事物 | |
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inefficient
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| adj.效率低的，无效的 | |
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impatience
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| n.不耐烦，急躁 | |
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thwarted
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| 阻挠( thwart的过去式和过去分词 )； 使受挫折； 挫败； 横过 | |
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vigor
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| n.活力，精力，元气 | |
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labor
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| n.劳动，努力，工作，劳工；分娩；vi.劳动，努力，苦干；vt.详细分析；麻烦 | |
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46
humility
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| n.谦逊，谦恭 | |
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remorse
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| n.痛恨，悔恨，自责 | |
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mere
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| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
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alteration
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| n.变更，改变；蚀变 | |
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drooped
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| 弯曲或下垂，发蔫( droop的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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brook
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| n.小河，溪；v.忍受，容让 | |
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doorway
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| n.门口，(喻)入门；门路，途径 | |
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pathos
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| n.哀婉，悲怆 | |
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54
jealousy
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| n.妒忌，嫉妒，猜忌 | |
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spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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56
determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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repentant
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| adj.对…感到悔恨的 | |
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remorseful
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| adj.悔恨的 | |
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homage
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| n.尊敬，敬意，崇敬 | |
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covert
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| adj.隐藏的；暗地里的 | |
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rotation
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| n.旋转；循环，轮流 | |
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fume
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| n.(usu pl.)(浓烈或难闻的)烟，气，汽 | |
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63
fret
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| v.(使)烦恼；(使)焦急；(使)腐蚀，(使)磨损 | |
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64
surmounted
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| 战胜( surmount的过去式和过去分词 )； 克服（困难）； 居于…之上； 在…顶上 | |
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65
shrugged
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| vt.耸肩（shrug的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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