“Not a one to nurse a grievance,” she adds. “A couple of minutes and it’s all past and forgotten.”
Our entry into the car was scarcely auspicious3, partly because the question of cherries had not vanished from my thoughts, p. 124partly because I wanted to go up the steps and my mother was resolved to go inside; the conductor spoke4 sharply, and my mother resented his tones. He expressed satisfaction in the knowledge that all passengers did not closely resemble us, and my mother retorted that if there were many conductors of his style people would prefer to walk. He said he supposed that she, being a woman, would insist on having the final word, and my mother suggested it must give him a nasty shock to find himself correct for the first time in his life; she added something about his features which struck me as being not in quite the best taste. I tugged5 at her arm.
“You be quiet!” she said to me sharply. “Perfect worry, that’s what you are. Catch me ever letting you come out again to look at the shops!”
The car started from Holborn on its twopenny journey to Stamford Hill in these circumstances. The conductor, in collecting fares, scowled6 at me, and I frowned back at him; before going up the steps he looked in again to say ironically that we were a pretty pair. A young man with his sweetheart seated next to us thought the remark was addressed to him, and there ensued a fresh wrangle7, at the end of which the youth took the conductor’s number, and half the passengers said the conductor had not gone p. 125outside the bounds of common civility; the other half referred to him as a Jack-in-office. The young woman spoke to me and made some complimentary8 allusion9 to my looks and general appearance.
“Keep still!” ordered my mother. “I won’t have you talking to Tom, Dick, and Harry10.”
I knew that argument was useless; it would have been a waste of time to point out that these names could not be rightly applied11 to my new friend. She, an amiable12 person, showed me the Holborn Town Hall, and remarked that she sometimes went to concerts there; the reference must have suggested something to me, for, despite my mother’s efforts to restrain, I lifted up my voice and sang. It was but a simple melody, but the earnestness I put into it seemed to touch the hearts of other passengers, and when I finished they had ceased the dispute regarding the conductor and were nodding to me pleasantly.
“Less noise inside there!” commanded the conductor, returned from upstairs.
“Let her sing if she wants to,” said a matronly woman near the door.
“I’m not a-going to have this tramcar turned into a Queen’s Hall,” he declared, “and you ought to know yourself better than encourage her.”
“I was young myself once.”
p. 126“That wasn’t yesterday,” he suggested.
The song had received so much favour that I considered the wisdom of giving them either another or diversifying13 the entertainment by offering some of my celebrated14 imitations. These have always been highly successful at home and at the houses of relatives; an uncle of mine remarked on one occasion that they were far and away superior to the originals. I had not, however, previously15 attempted them before an audience of strangers, and this, for the moment, made me shy and nervous. The moment of hesitation16 over, I started.
“Now, that’s what I call clever,” said the young man near to us. “Milly, if you could only do something like that I might get reelly fond of you!”
My first idea was to make eyes at him; reflection told me that the love of a man who was so easily influenced could never be worth having, and I reassured17 the girl with a smile. Glancing up and down the car, I could see that I had now secured complete attention. Men had folded up evening newspapers, and were waiting to see what I would do next; women beamed in my direction and one opposite offered me chocolates. I took the box, but my mother, whose knowledge of the rules of etiquette18 forms the subject of one of her proudest boasts, said it would be more genteel to select only one of the sweets. I accepted the hint, and my mother—now in p. 127good temper, and making no attempt to conceal19 the fact—remarked to the others that I had always been noted20 for excellence21 of behaviour.
I gave next a recitation—one of my own composition—a short but telling piece, with somewhat humorous references to the incident of a cat who found its saucer of milk empty. This went only fairly well; I think I must give more care to voice-production. The matronly lady near the door asked what it was supposed to be all about, and my mother readily furnished a sort of synopsis22. Some one begged I would sing again, but, discouraged by the cool acceptance of the recital23, I declined, until my mother begged and entreated24 me not to sing. At the conclusion there was that genuine and hearty25 applause which every public performer recognises and welcomes.
“Bless my soul!” cried some of the passengers, “Shoreditch Church, already!” They said goodbye to me, and I endeavoured to thank them for their kindness in listening to my poor efforts. One offered me a coin, which I flung upon the floor. I am an amateur, not a professional.
It was as the car went up Stoke Newington Road that I introduced my most diverting item. It has always pleased, but I was not certain that here it would be appreciated. The idea is to begin with a smile, to allow the p. 128smile to broaden and become more pronounced; this is followed by a chuckle26, and then comes a peal27 of laughter. My mother identified the early stages, and, trembling with pride, warned the rest to pay special and particular notice. I am not exaggerating when I say that in less than a minute I had the whole car with me—every one amused, some roaring. The conductor put his hand over his face, but was compelled to give way, and he went so far as to admit, very handsomely, that it was the funniest thing he had witnessed outside the Dalston Hippodrome.
“Don’t tire yourself, darling,” begged my mother solicitously28, and speaking in aristocratic tones. “Be careful not to overdo29 it. You know what you’re like when you’ve been excited.”
I pushed her advice aside, and when the car slowed up near the station I do believe all who were going on to the terminus felt honestly sorry to see me preparing to leave. As we stood on the pavement—the conductor had given us a hand, and he apologised for brusqueness of behaviour at the start, explaining that there had been an awkward passenger on the previous journey, and they had come to words—as we stood, I say, on the pavement, every one in the car waved hands, and the young man, I was gratified to notice, blew a kiss.
p. 129“Hullo, Ernest!” said my mother. “Here we are at last. Been waiting long?”
“Months and months and months,” replied my father. “What sort of a girl has she been? Baby,” he went on, addressing me, and taking me in his arms, “you may be as clever as your mother tries to make out, but I take me oath you don’t get none the lighter30 as time goes on!”
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1
acrimonious
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| adj.严厉的，辛辣的，刻毒的 | |
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2
goads
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| n.赶牲口的尖棒( goad的名词复数 )v.刺激( goad的第三人称单数 )；激励；（用尖棒）驱赶；驱使（或怂恿、刺激）某人 | |
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3
auspicious
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| adj.吉利的；幸运的，吉兆的 | |
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4
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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5
tugged
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| v.用力拉，使劲拉，猛扯( tug的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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6
scowled
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| 怒视，生气地皱眉( scowl的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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7
wrangle
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| vi.争吵 | |
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8
complimentary
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| adj.赠送的，免费的，赞美的，恭维的 | |
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9
allusion
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| n.暗示，间接提示 | |
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10
harry
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| vt.掠夺，蹂躏，使苦恼 | |
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11
applied
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| adj.应用的；v.应用，适用 | |
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12
amiable
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| adj.和蔼可亲的，友善的，亲切的 | |
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13
diversifying
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| v.使多样化，多样化( diversify的现在分词 )；进入新的商业领域 | |
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14
celebrated
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| adj.有名的，声誉卓著的 | |
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15
previously
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| adv.以前，先前（地） | |
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16
hesitation
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| n.犹豫，踌躇 | |
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17
reassured
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| adj.使消除疑虑的；使放心的v.再保证，恢复信心( reassure的过去式和过去分词) | |
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18
etiquette
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| n.礼仪，礼节；规矩 | |
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19
conceal
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| v.隐藏，隐瞒，隐蔽 | |
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20
noted
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| adj.著名的，知名的 | |
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21
excellence
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| n.优秀，杰出，(pl.)优点，美德 | |
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22
synopsis
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| n.提要，梗概 | |
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23
recital
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| n.朗诵，独奏会，独唱会 | |
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24
entreated
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| 恳求，乞求( entreat的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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25
hearty
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| adj.热情友好的；衷心的；尽情的，纵情的 | |
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26
chuckle
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| vi.／n.轻声笑，咯咯笑 | |
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27
peal
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| n.钟声；v.鸣响 | |
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28
solicitously
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| adv.热心地，热切地 | |
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29
overdo
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| vt.把...做得过头，演得过火 | |
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30
lighter
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| n.打火机，点火器；驳船；v.用驳船运送；light的比较级 | |
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