I rode beside Colonel Elias Dayton one forenoon some ten days later, up the Valley road, my pulses beating fast at the growing familiarity of the scene before us. We had crossed the Chuctenunda Creek1, and were within sight of the gray walls of Guy Park. Beyond rose the hills behind which lay Fort Johnson. I was on the very threshold of my boyhood's playfield--within a short hour's walk of my boyhood's home.
The air was full of sounds. Birds sang with merry discordance2 all through the thicket3 to our right, flitting among the pale green tangle4 of spring's foliage5. The May sunshine had lured6 forth7 some pioneer locusts8, whose shrill9 cries came from who could tell where--the tall swale-grass on the river edge, erect10 now again after the April floods, or the brown broom-corn nearer the road, or from the sky above? We could hear the squirrels' mocking chatter11 in the tree-tops, the whir of the kingfishers along the willow-fringed water--the indefinable chorus of Nature's myriad12 small children, all glad that spring was come. But above these our ears took in the ceaseless clang of the drums, and the sound of hundreds of armed men's feet, tramping in unison13 upon the road before us, behind us, at our side.
For my second return to the Valley was at the head of troops, bringing violence, perhaps bloodshed, in their train. I could not but contrast it in my mind with that other home-coming, four years before, when I sat turned to look eastward14 in the bow of Enoch's boat, and every soft dip of the oars15 timed the glad carol in my heart of home and friends--and the sweet maid I loved. I was so happy then!--and now, coming from the other direction, with suggestions of force and cruel purposes in every echo of our soldiers' tread, I was, to tell the plain truth, very miserable16 withal.
My talk with Colonel Dayton had, in a way, contributed to this gloomy feeling. We had, from choice, ridden side by side for the better part of two days, and, for very need of confiding17 in some one, I had talked with him concerning my affairs more freely than was my wont18. This was the easier, because he was a contemplative, serious, and sensible man, whose words and manner created confidence. Moreover, he was neither Dutchman nor Yankee, but a native Jerseyman, and so considered my story from an equable and fair point of view, without bias19.
It was, indeed, passing strange that this man, on his way to seize or crush the Johnson clique20, as the case might be, should have been the one to first arouse in my mind the idea that, after all, the Tories had their good side, and were doing what to them seemed right, at tremendous cost and sacrifice to themselves. I had been telling him what a ruffian was Philip Cross, and what grounds I had for hating him, and despitefully describing the other chief Tories of the district. He said in reply, I remember:
"You seem to miss the sad phase of all this, my friend. Your young blood feels only the partisan21 promptings of dislike. Some day--soon, perhaps-- you will all at once find this youthful heat gone; you will begin to walk around men and things, so to speak, and study them from all sides. This stage comes to every sober mind; it will come to you. Then you will realize that this baronet up yonder is, from his own stand-point, a chivalrous22, gallant23 loyal gentleman, who imperils estates, power, peace, almost life itself, rather than do what he holds to be weak or wrong. Why, take even this enemy of yours, this Cross. He was one of the notables of these parts--rich, popular, influential24; he led a life of utmost luxury and pleasure. All this he has exchanged for the rough work of a soldier, with its privations, cold, fatigue25, and the risk of death. Ask yourself why he did it."
"I see what you would enforce," I said. "Your meaning is that these men, as well as our side, think the right is theirs."
"Precisely26. They have inherited certain ideas. We disagree with them; we deem it our duty to silence them, fight them, drive them out of the country, and, with God's help, we will do it. But let us do this with our eyes open, and with the understanding that they are not necessarily scoundrels and heathen because they fail to see things as we see them."
"But you would not defend, surely, their plotting to use the savages27 against their neighbors--against helpless women and children. That must be heathenish to any mind."
"Defend it? No! I do not defend any acts of theirs. Rid your mind of the idea that because a man tries to understand a thing he therefore defends it. But I can see how they would defend it to their own consciences--just as these thrifty28 Whig farmers hereabout explain in their own minds as patriotic29 and public-spirited their itching30 to get hold of Johnson's Manor31. Try and look at things in this light. Good and bad are relative terms; nothing is positively32 and unchangeably evil. Each group of men has its own little world of reasons and motives33, its own atmosphere, its own standard of right and wrong. If you shut your eyes, and condemn34 or praise these wholly, without first striving to comprehend them, you may or may not do mischief35 to them; you assuredly injure yourself."
Thus, and at great length, spoke36 the philosophical37 colonel. I could not help suspecting that he had too open a mind to be a very valuable fighter, and, indeed, this proved to be true. He subsequently built some good and serviceable forts along the Mohawk, one of which to this day bears his name, but he attained38 no distinction as a soldier in the field.
But, none the less, his words impressed me greatly. What he said had never been put to me in clear form before, and at twenty-seven a man's mind is in that receptive frame, trembling upon the verge39 of the meditative40 stage, when the presentation of new ideas like these often marks a distinct turn in the progress and direction of his thoughts. It seems strange to confess it, but I still look back to that May day of 1776 as the date of my first notion that there could be anything admirable in my enemies.
At the time, these new views and the tone of our talk helped to disquiet41 me. The swinging lines of shoulders, the tramp! tramp! in the mud, the sight of the guns and swords about me, were all depressing. They seemed to give a sinister42 significance to my return. It was my home, the dearest spot on earth--this smiling, peaceful, sunlit Mohawk Valley--and I was entering it with soldiers whose mission was to seize and despoil43 the son of my boyhood's friend, Sir William. More than one of my old play-mates, now grown to man's estate, would note with despair our approach, and curse me for being of it. The lady of Johnson Hall, to whom all this would be horrible nigh unto death, was a close, warm friend of Daisy's. So my thoughts ran gloomily, and I had no joy in any of the now familiar sights around me.
The march up from Schenectady had been a most wearisome one for the men, owing to the miserable condition of the road, never over-smooth and now rendered doubly bad and difficult by the spring freshets and the oozing44 frost. When we reached the pleasant little hollow in which Fort Johnson nestles, a halt was accordingly ordered, and the tired soldiers prepared to refresh themselves with food by the banks of the creek. It was now afternoon; we were distant but a short mile from the Cedars45, and I could not abide46 the thought of lingering here, to no purpose, so close to the goal of all my longings47. I therefore exchanged some plans and suggestions with Colonel Dayton and his companion Judge Duer, who represented the civil law in the expedition, and so clapped spurs and dashed forward up the road.
"It seems ten years, not four, since I was last here," I was saying to Daisy half an hour later, and unconsciously framing in words the thoughts which her face suggested.
I know not how to describe the changes which this lapse49 of time had wrought50 upon her countenance51 and carriage. In the more obvious, outward sense, it had scarcely aged52 her. She was now twenty-three years of age, and I doubt a stranger would have deemed her older. Yet, looking upon her and listening to her, I seemed to feel that, instead of being four years her senior, I was in truth the younger of the two. The old buoyant, girlish air was all gone, for one thing. She spoke now with gentle, sweet-toned gravity; and her eyes, frankly53 meeting mine as of old, had in their glance a soft, reposeful54 dignity which was new to me.
Almost another Daisy, too, she seemed in face. It was the woman in her features, I dare say, which disconcerted me. I had expected changes, perhaps, but not upon these lines. She had been the prettiest maiden55 of the Valley, beyond all others. She was not pretty now, I should say, but she was beautiful--somewhat pallid56, yet not to give an air of unhealth; the delicate chiselling57 of features yielded now not merely the pleasure of regularity58, but the subtler charm of sensitive, thoughtful character. The eyes and hair seemed a deeper hazel, a darker brown, than they had been. The lips had lost some, thing of their childish curve, and met each other in a straight line--fairer than ever, I thought, because more firm.
I am striving now, you see, against great odds59, to revive in words the impressions of difference which came to me in those first hours, as I scanned her face. They furnish forth no real portrait of the dear lady: how could I hope they should? But they help to define, even if dimly, the changes toward strength and self-control I found in her.
I was, indeed, all unprepared for what awaited me here at the Cedars. My heart had been torn by all manner of anxieties and concern. I had hastened forward, convinced that my aid and protection were direly60 needed. I sat now, almost embarrassed, digesting the fact that the fortunes of the Cedars were in sufficient and capable hands.
Mr. Stewart's condition was in truth sad enough. He had greeted me with such cordiality and clear-wittedness of utterance61 and manner that at first I fancied his misfortunes to have been exaggerated in my mother's letter. His conversation for a moment or two was also coherent and timely. But his mind was prone62 to wander mysteriously. He presently said: "Assuredly I taught you to shave with both hands. I knew I could not be mistaken." I stole a glance toward Daisy at this, and her answering nod showed me the whole case. It was after old Eli had come in and wheeled Mr. Stewart in his big chair out into the garden, that I spoke to Daisy of the differences time had wrought.
"Ay," she said, "it must be sadly apparent to you--the change in everything."
How should I approach the subject--the one thing of which I knew we were both thinking? There seemed a wall between us. She had been unaffectedly glad to see me; had, for the instant, I fancied, thought to offer me her cheek to kiss--yet was, with it all, so self-possessed and reserved that I shrank from touching63 upon her trouble.
"Perhaps not everything is sad," I made answer, falteringly64. "Poor Mr. Stewart--that is indeed mournful; but, on the other hand--" I broke off abruptly65.
"On the other hand," she took up my words calmly, "you are thinking that I am advantaged by Philip's departure."
My face must have showed that I could not deny it.
"In some respects," she went on, "yes; in others, no. I am glad to be able to speak freely to you, Douw, for you are nearest to me of all that are left. I do not altogether know my own mind; for that matter, does any one? The Philip to whom I gave my heart and whom I married is one person; the Philip who trampled66 on the heart and fled his home seems quite another and a different man. I hesitate between the two sometimes. I cannot always say to myself: 'The first was all fancy; the second is the reality.' Rather, they blend themselves in my mind, and I seem to see the fond lover remaining still the good husband, if only I had had the knowledge and tenderness to keep him so!"
"In what are you to be reproached, Daisy?" I said this somewhat testily67, for the self-accusation nettled68 me.
"It may easily be that I was not wise, Douw. Indeed, I showed small wisdom from the beginning."
"It was all the doing of that old cat, Lady Berenicia!" I said, with melancholy69 conviction.
"Nay70, blame not her alone. I was the silly girl to be thus befooled. My heart would have served me better if it had been all good. The longing48 for finery and luxury was my own. I yearned71 to be set above the rest. I dreamed to be called 'My lady,' too, in good time. I forgot that I came from the poor people, and that I belonged to them. So well and truly did I forget this that the fact struck me like a whip when--when it was brought to my notice."
"He taunted72 you with it, then!" I burst forth, my mind working quickly for once.
She made no answer for the time, but rose from her chair and looked out upon the group in the garden. From the open door she saw the van of Dayton's soldiers trudging73 up the Valley road. I had previously74 told her of their mission and my business.
"Poor Lady Johnson," she said, resting her head against her hand on the door-frame, and looking upon the advancing troops with a weary expression of face. "Her trouble is coming--mine is past." Then, after a pause: "Will they be harsh with Sir John, think you? I trust not. They have both been kind to me since--since Philip went. Sir John is not bad at heart, Douw, believe me. You twain never liked each other, I know. He is a bitter man with those who are against him, but his heart is good if you touch it aright."
I had not much to say to this. "I am glad he was good to you," I managed to utter, not over-graciously, I fear.
The troops went by, with no sound of drums now, lest an alarm be raised prematurely75. We watched them pass in silence, and soon after I took my leave for the day, saying that I would go up to see the Fondas at Caughnawaga, and cross the river to my mother's home, and would return next morning. We shook hands at parting, almost with constraint76.
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1
creek
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| n.小溪，小河，小湾 | |
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discordance
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| n.不调和，不和，不一致性；不整合；假整合 | |
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thicket
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| n.灌木丛，树林 | |
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tangle
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| n.纠缠；缠结；混乱；v.(使)缠绕；变乱 | |
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foliage
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| n.叶子，树叶，簇叶 | |
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lured
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| 吸引，引诱（lure的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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forth
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| adv.向前；向外，往外 | |
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locusts
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| n.蝗虫( locust的名词复数 )；贪吃的人；破坏者；槐树 | |
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shrill
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| adj.尖声的；刺耳的；v尖叫 | |
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erect
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| n./v.树立，建立，使竖立；adj.直立的，垂直的 | |
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chatter
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| vi.／n.喋喋不休；短促尖叫；(牙齿)打战 | |
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myriad
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| adj.无数的；n.无数，极大数量 | |
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unison
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| n.步调一致，行动一致 | |
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eastward
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| adv.向东；adj.向东的；n.东方，东部 | |
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oars
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| n.桨，橹( oar的名词复数 )；划手v.划（行）( oar的第三人称单数 ) | |
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miserable
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| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
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confiding
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| adj.相信人的，易于相信的v.吐露（秘密，心事等）( confide的现在分词 )；（向某人）吐露（隐私、秘密等） | |
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wont
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| adj.习惯于；v.习惯；n.习惯 | |
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bias
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| n.偏见，偏心，偏袒；vt.使有偏见 | |
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clique
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| n.朋党派系，小集团 | |
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partisan
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| adj.党派性的；游击队的；n.游击队员；党徒 | |
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chivalrous
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| adj.武士精神的；对女人彬彬有礼的 | |
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gallant
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| adj.英勇的，豪侠的；(向女人)献殷勤的 | |
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influential
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| adj.有影响的，有权势的 | |
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fatigue
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| n.疲劳，劳累 | |
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precisely
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| adv.恰好，正好，精确地，细致地 | |
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savages
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| 未开化的人，野蛮人( savage的名词复数 ) | |
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thrifty
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| adj.节俭的；兴旺的；健壮的 | |
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patriotic
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| adj.爱国的，有爱国心的 | |
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itching
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| adj.贪得的，痒的，渴望的v.发痒( itch的现在分词 ) | |
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manor
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| n.庄园，领地 | |
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positively
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| adv.明确地，断然，坚决地；实在，确实 | |
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motives
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| n.动机，目的( motive的名词复数 ) | |
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condemn
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| vt.谴责，指责；宣判(罪犯)，判刑 | |
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mischief
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| n.损害，伤害，危害；恶作剧，捣蛋，胡闹 | |
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spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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philosophical
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| adj.哲学家的，哲学上的，达观的 | |
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attained
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| （通常经过努力）实现( attain的过去式和过去分词 )； 达到； 获得； 达到（某年龄、水平、状况） | |
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verge
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| n.边，边缘；v.接近，濒临 | |
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meditative
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| adj.沉思的，冥想的 | |
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disquiet
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| n.担心，焦虑 | |
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sinister
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| adj.不吉利的，凶恶的，左边的 | |
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despoil
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| v.夺取，抢夺 | |
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44
oozing
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| v.（浓液等）慢慢地冒出，渗出( ooze的现在分词 )；使（液体）缓缓流出；（浓液）渗出，慢慢流出 | |
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45
cedars
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| 雪松，西洋杉( cedar的名词复数 ) | |
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abide
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| vi.遵守；坚持；vt.忍受 | |
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longings
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| 渴望，盼望( longing的名词复数 ) | |
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longing
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| n.（for）渴望 | |
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lapse
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| n.过失，流逝，失效，抛弃信仰，间隔；vi.堕落，停止，失效，流逝；vt.使失效 | |
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50
wrought
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| v.引起；以…原料制作；运转；adj.制造的 | |
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51
countenance
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| n.脸色，面容；面部表情；vt.支持，赞同 | |
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52
aged
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| adj.年老的，陈年的 | |
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53
frankly
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| adv.坦白地，直率地；坦率地说 | |
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reposeful
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| adj.平稳的，沉着的 | |
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maiden
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| n.少女，处女；adj.未婚的，纯洁的，无经验的 | |
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pallid
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| adj.苍白的，呆板的 | |
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chiselling
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| n.錾v.凿，雕，镌( chisel的现在分词 ) | |
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regularity
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| n.规律性，规则性；匀称，整齐 | |
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odds
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| n.让步，机率，可能性，比率；胜败优劣之别 | |
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direly
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| 可怕的，恐怖的； 悲惨的； 迫切的，极端的 | |
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utterance
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| n.用言语表达，话语，言语 | |
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prone
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| adj.(to)易于…的，很可能…的；俯卧的 | |
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touching
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| adj.动人的，使人感伤的 | |
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falteringly
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| 口吃地，支吾地 | |
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abruptly
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| adv.突然地，出其不意地 | |
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trampled
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| 踩( trample的过去式和过去分词 )； 践踏； 无视； 侵犯 | |
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testily
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| adv. 易怒地, 暴躁地 | |
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nettled
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| v.拿荨麻打，拿荨麻刺（nettle的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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melancholy
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| n.忧郁，愁思；adj.令人感伤（沮丧）的，忧郁的 | |
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nay
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| adv.不；n.反对票，投反对票者 | |
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yearned
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| 渴望，切盼，向往( yearn的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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taunted
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| 嘲讽( taunt的过去式和过去分词 )； 嘲弄； 辱骂； 奚落 | |
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trudging
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| vt.& vi.跋涉，吃力地走（trudge的现在分词形式） | |
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previously
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| adv.以前，先前（地） | |
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75
prematurely
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| adv.过早地，贸然地 | |
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76
constraint
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| n.(on)约束，限制；限制(或约束)性的事物 | |
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