NINETEENTH EVENING. FOR RENUNCIATION OF SELF.

"Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think anything as of ourselves; but our sufficiency is of God."—2 Cor. iii. 5.

O God! do Thou bend Thy pitying eye upon me this night, as I venture once more into Thy sacred presence. What mercy it is that, with all my great unworthiness, a throne of grace is still open, and a God of grace is still waiting to be gracious!

I come to Thee in deep creature-destitution, bringing nothing in my hands, but simply cleaving¹, blessed Jesus, to Thy cross; looking away from my guilty self and my guilty doings to Thee, who hast done all and suffered all for me, I rejoice to think that Thou hast broken {64} every chain of condemnation—that Thou hast satisfied the requirements of a broken law; and having overcome the sharpness of death, Thou hast opened the kingdom of heaven to all believers.

Oh let me not continue in sin because all this wondrous² grace abounds³. Let me not think lightly of the accursed thing which was the cause of all Thine untold⁴ and unutterable anguish⁵. I know, Lord, that I am apt at times to plead vain excuses for my sins. I am unwilling⁶ to think them, and to think myself, so vile⁷ as I really am, in Thy pure and holy eye.

My heart is deceitful; but "Thou art greater than my heart." Oh bring me in self-renouncing lowliness to cry out, "God be merciful to me a sinner." Let me cling to no remnants of my own self-righteousness. Let me see that my best actions are marred⁸ with defilement⁹ and mingled¹⁰ with impure¹¹ and unworthy motives¹².

Enable me to aim more and more at the conquest of self. Show me the plague of my own heart. Keep me from all that is unamiable and selfish, from all that is unkind and uncharitable, and that would exalt¹³ myself at the expense of {65} others. Keep me holy. Keep me lowly.—Lead me through the valley of humiliation¹⁴. May life become more one grand effort to crucify sin and to please God. Take, gracious Saviour¹⁵, my whole heart, and make it Thine; occupy it without a rival. May there be no competing affection. Keep me from alienating¹⁶ existence from its great end, by living to myself. May this be the superscription on all my thoughts, and duties, and engagements—"I am not my own, I am bought with a price."

May whatever be Thy time be mine. May I not murmur¹⁷ at deferred¹⁸ blessings¹⁹ or disappointed hopes. May my own will be resolved into the will of Him who knows best what to give and what to withhold²¹.

May the Lord have mercy upon Zion. May showers of blessing²⁰ descend²² on Thy holy hill. Hasten the glories of the latter day, when Jesus shall take to Himself His great power and reign²³!

Bless all my dear friends; may those ties which may be so soon severed²⁴ here be rendered indissoluble by grace. Guard their couch and mine this night; give us refreshing²⁵ sleep, lying down in Thy fear, and awaking in Thy favor, {66} fitted for all the duties of a new day. And all we ask or hope for is for the Redeemer's sake. Amen.

"LET MY PRAYER BE SET FORTH²⁶ BEFORE THEE AS
INCENSE²⁷: AND THE LIFTING UP OF MY HANDS
AS THE EVENING SACRIFICE."

1 cleaving   

v.劈开，剁开，割开( cleave的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• The freighter carrying pig iron is cleaving through the water. 装着生铁的货船正在破浪前进。 来自辞典例句
• IL-10-cDNA fragment was obtained through cleaving pUC-T-IL-10cDNA by reconstriction enzymes. 结果：pcDNA3.1-IL-10酶切鉴定的电泳结果显示，pcDNA3.1-IL-10质粒有一个560bp左右的插入片断，大小和IL-10cDNA大致符合。 来自互联网

2 wondrous   

adj.令人惊奇的，奇妙的；adv.惊人地；异乎寻常地；令人惊叹地

参考例句：

• The internal structure of the Department is wondrous to behold.看一下国务院的内部结构是很有意思的。
• We were driven across this wondrous vast land of lakes and forests.我们乘车穿越这片有着湖泊及森林的广袤而神奇的土地。

3 abounds   

v.大量存在，充满，富于( abound的第三人称单数 )

参考例句：

• The place abounds with fruit, especially pears and peaches. 此地盛产水果，尤以梨桃著称。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
• This country abounds with fruit. 这个国家盛产水果。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》

4 untold   

adj.数不清的，无数的

参考例句：

• She has done untold damage to our chances.她给我们的机遇造成了不可估量的损害。
• They suffered untold terrors in the dark and huddled together for comfort.他们遭受着黑暗中的难以言传的种种恐怖，因而只好挤在一堆互相壮胆。

5 anguish   

n.(尤指心灵上的)极度痛苦，烦恼

参考例句：

• She cried out for anguish at parting.分手时，她由于痛苦而失声大哭。
• The unspeakable anguish wrung his heart.难言的痛苦折磨着他的心。

6 unwilling   

adj.不情愿的

参考例句：

• The natives were unwilling to be bent by colonial power.土著居民不愿受殖民势力的摆布。
• His tightfisted employer was unwilling to give him a raise.他那吝啬的雇主不肯给他加薪。

7 vile   

adj.卑鄙的，可耻的，邪恶的；坏透的

参考例句：

• Who could have carried out such a vile attack?会是谁发起这么卑鄙的攻击呢？
• Her talk was full of vile curses.她的话里充满着恶毒的咒骂。

8 marred   

adj. 被损毁, 污损的

参考例句：

• The game was marred by the behaviour of drunken fans. 喝醉了的球迷行为不轨，把比赛给搅了。
• Bad diction marred the effectiveness of his speech. 措词不当影响了他演说的效果。

9 defilement   

n.弄脏，污辱，污秽

参考例句：

• That the miraculous spring would wash away all defilement. 奇妙的泉水会洗掉一切的污秽。 来自辞典例句
• Follow the wisdom of Manjusri Bodhisattva, keep away from troubles and defilement. 具备文殊菩萨的智慧，远离恼害。 来自互联网

10 mingled   

混合，混入( mingle的过去式和过去分词 )； 混进，与…交往[联系]

参考例句：

• The sounds of laughter and singing mingled in the evening air. 笑声和歌声交织在夜空中。
• The man and the woman mingled as everyone started to relax. 当大家开始放松的时候，这一男一女就开始交往了。

11 impure   

adj.不纯净的，不洁的；不道德的，下流的

参考例句：

• The air of a big city is often impure.大城市的空气往往是污浊的。
• Impure drinking water is a cause of disease.不洁的饮用水是引发疾病的一个原因。

12 motives   

n.动机，目的( motive的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• to impeach sb's motives 怀疑某人的动机
• His motives are unclear. 他的用意不明。

13 exalt   

v.赞扬，歌颂，晋升，提升

参考例句：

• She thanked the President to exalt her.她感谢总统提拔她。
• His work exalts all those virtues that we,as Americans,are taught to hold dear.他的作品颂扬了所有那些身为美国人应该珍视的美德。

14 humiliation   

n.羞辱

参考例句：

• He suffered the humiliation of being forced to ask for his cards.他蒙受了被迫要求辞职的羞辱。
• He will wish to revenge his humiliation in last Season's Final.他会为在上个季度的决赛中所受的耻辱而报复的。

15 saviour   

n.拯救者，救星

参考例句：

• I saw myself as the saviour of my country.我幻想自己为国家的救星。
• The people clearly saw her as their saviour.人们显然把她看成了救星。

16 alienating   

v.使疏远( alienate的现在分词 )；使不友好；转让；让渡（财产等）

参考例句：

• The phenomena of alienation are widespread. Sports are also alienating. 异化现象普遍存在，体育运动也不例外。 来自互联网
• How can you appeal to them without alienating the mainstream crowd? 你是怎么在不疏忽主流玩家的情况下吸引住他们呢？ 来自互联网

17 murmur   

n.低语，低声的怨言；v.低语，低声而言

参考例句：

• They paid the extra taxes without a murmur.他们毫无怨言地交了附加税。
• There was a low murmur of conversation in the hall.大厅里有窃窃私语声。

18 deferred   

adj.延期的，缓召的v.拖延，延缓，推迟( defer的过去式和过去分词 )；服从某人的意愿，遵从

参考例句：

• The department deferred the decision for six months. 这个部门推迟了六个月才作决定。
• a tax-deferred savings plan 延税储蓄计划

19 blessings   

n.（上帝的）祝福( blessing的名词复数 )；好事；福分；因祸得福

参考例句：

• Afflictions are sometimes blessings in disguise. 塞翁失马，焉知非福。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• We don't rely on blessings from Heaven. 我们不靠老天保佑。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》

20 blessing   

n.祈神赐福；祷告；祝福，祝愿

参考例句：

• The blessing was said in Hebrew.祷告用了希伯来语。
• A double blessing has descended upon the house.双喜临门。

21 withhold   

v.拒绝，不给；使停止，阻挡

参考例句：

• It was unscrupulous of their lawyer to withhold evidence.他们的律师隐瞒证据是不道德的。
• I couldn't withhold giving some loose to my indignation.我忍不住要发泄一点我的愤怒。

22 descend   

vt./vi.传下来，下来，下降

参考例句：

• I hope the grace of God would descend on me.我期望上帝的恩惠。
• We're not going to descend to such methods.我们不会沦落到使用这种手段。

23 reign   

n.统治时期，统治，支配，盛行；v.占优势

参考例句：

• The reign of Queen Elizabeth lapped over into the seventeenth century.伊丽莎白王朝延至17世纪。
• The reign of Zhu Yuanzhang lasted about 31 years.朱元璋统治了大约三十一年。

24 severed   

v.切断，断绝( sever的过去式和过去分词 )；断，裂

参考例句：

• The doctor said I'd severed a vessel in my leg. 医生说我割断了腿上的一根血管。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• We have severed diplomatic relations with that country. 我们与那个国家断绝了外交关系。 来自《简明英汉词典》

25 refreshing   

adj.使精神振作的，使人清爽的，使人喜欢的

参考例句：

• I find it'so refreshing to work with young people in this department.我发现和这一部门的青年一起工作令人精神振奋。
• The water was cold and wonderfully refreshing.水很涼，特别解乏提神。

26 forth   

adv.向前；向外，往外

参考例句：

• The wind moved the trees gently back and forth.风吹得树轻轻地来回摇晃。
• He gave forth a series of works in rapid succession.他很快连续发表了一系列的作品。

27 incense   

v.激怒；n.香，焚香时的烟，香气

参考例句：

• This proposal will incense conservation campaigners.这项提议会激怒环保人士。
• In summer,they usually burn some coil incense to keep away the mosquitoes.夏天他们通常点香驱蚊。