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Chapter 18
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A NIECE'S LITERARY ADVICE TO HER UNCLE

A Veteran Novelist, who was also an intimate friend of the Easy Chair's, sat before his desk pensively1 supporting his cheek in his left hand while his right toyed with the pen from which, for the moment at least, fiction refused to flow. His great-niece, who seemed such a contradiction in terms, being as little and vivid personally as she was nominally2 large and stately, opened the door and advanced upon him.

"Do I disturb you, uncle?" she asked; she did not call him great-uncle, because that, she rightly said, was ridiculous; and now, as part of the informality, she went on without waiting for him to answer, "Because, you know, you wanted me to tell you what I thought of your last story; and I've just read it."

"Oh yes!" the Veteran Novelist assented3 brightly, hiding his struggle to recall which story it was. "Well?"

"Well," she said, firmly but kindly4, "you want me to be frank with you, don't you?"

"By all means, my dear. It's very good of you to read my story." By this time, he had, with the help of the rather lean volume into which his publishers had expanded a long-short story, and which she now held intensely clasped to her breast, really remembered.

"Not at all!" she said. She sat down very elastically5 in the chair on the other side of his desk, and as she talked she accented each of her emotions by a spring from the cushioned seat. "In the first place," she said, with the effect of coming directly to business, "I suppose you know yourself that it couldn't be called virile6."

"No?" he returned. "What is virile?"

"Well, I can't explain, precisely7; but it's something that all the critics say of a book that is very strong, don't you know; and masterful; and relentless8; and makes you feel as if somebody had taken you by the throat; and shakes you up awfully9; and seems to throw you into the air, and trample10 you under foot."

"Good heavens, my dear!" the Veteran Novelist exclaimed. "I hope I'm a gentleman, even when I'm writing a novel."

"Your being a gentleman has nothing to do with it, uncle!" she said, severely12, for she thought she perceived a disposition13 in the Veteran Novelist to shuffle14. "You can't be virile and at the same time remember that you are a gentleman. Lots of women write virile books."

"Ladies?" the novelist asked.

"Don't I say that has nothing to do with it? If you wish to grip the reader's attention you must let yourself go, whether you're a gentleman or a lady. Of course," she relented, "your book's very idyllic15, and delightful16, and all that; but," she resumed, severely, "do you think an honest critic could say there was not a dull page in it from cover to cover?"

The novelist sighed. "I'm sure I don't know. They seem to say it—in the passages quoted in the advertisements—of all the books published. Except mine," he added, sadly.

"Well, we will pass that point," his great-niece relented again. "I didn't intend to wound your feelings, uncle."

"Oh, you haven't. I suppose I am a little too easy-going at times."

"Yes, that is it. One can't say dull; but too easy-going. No faithful critic could begin a notice of your book with such a passage as: 'Have you read it? No? Then hop11, skip, and jump, and get it. Don't wait to find your hat or drink your coffee. March! It's going like the wind, and you must kite if you want one of the first edition of fifty thousand!' Now that," his great-niece ended, fondly, "is what I should like every critic to say of your book, uncle."

The Veteran Novelist reflected for a moment. Then he said, more spiritedly, "I don't believe I should, my dear."

"Then you must; that's all. But that's a small thing. What I really wonder at is that, with all your experience, you are not more of a stylist."

"Stylist?"

"Yes. I don't believe there's an epigram in your book from beginning to end. That's the reason the critics don't quote any brilliant sentences from it, and the publishers can't advertise it properly. It makes me mad to find the girls repeating other authors' sayings, and I never catch a word from a book of yours, though you've been writing more than a century."

"Not quite so long, my dear, I think; though very, very long. But just what do you mean by style?"

"Well, you ought to say even the simplest things in a distinguished18 way; and here, all through, I find you saying the most distinguished things in the simplest way. But I won't worry you about things that are not vital. I'll allow, for the sake of argument, that you can't have virility19 if you remember that you are a gentleman even when you are writing fiction. But you can have passion. Why don't you?"

"Don't I? I thought—"

"Not a speck20 of it—not a single speck! It's rather a delicate point, and I don't exactly know how to put it, but, if you want me to be frank, I must." She looked at her great-uncle, and he nodded encouragement. "I don't believe there's a single place where he crushes her to his heart, or presses his lips to hers in a long kiss. He kisses her cheek once, but I don't call that anything. Why, in lots of the books, nowadays, the girls themselves cling to the men in a close embrace, or put their mouths tenderly to theirs—Well, of course, it sounds rather disgusting, but in your own earlier books, I'm sure there's more of it—of passion. Isn't there? Think!"

The Veteran Novelist tried to think. "To tell you the truth, my dear, I can't remember. I hope there was, and there always will be, love, and true love, in my novels—the kind that sometimes ends in happy marriage, but is always rather shy of showing itself off to the reader in caresses21 of any kind. I think passion can be intimated, and is better so than brutally22 stated. If you have a lot of hugging and kissing—"

"Uncle!"

"—How are your lovers different from those poor things in the Park that make you ashamed as you pass them?"

"The police ought to put a stop to it. They are perfectly23 disgraceful!"

"And they ought to put a stop to it in the novels. It's not only indecent, but it's highly insanitary. Nice people don't want you to kiss their children, nowadays, and yet they expect us novelists to supply them with passion of the most demonstrative sort in our fiction. Among the Japanese, who are now one of the great world-powers, kissing is quite unknown in real life. I don't know the Japanese fiction very well, but I doubt whether there's a single kiss, or double, in it. I believe that a novel full of intense passion could be written without the help of one embrace from beginning to end."

"Uncle!" the girl vividly24 exclaimed, "why don't you do it? It would be the greatest success! Just give them the wink25, somehow, at the start—just hint that there was the greatest kind of passion going on all the time and never once showing itself, and the girls would be raving26 about it. Why don't you do it, uncle? You know I do so want you, for once, to write the most popular book of the month!"

"I want to do it myself, my dear. But as to my writing a book full of suppressed passion, that's a story in itself."

"Tell it!" she entreated27.

"The Easy Chair wouldn't give me room for it. But I'll tell you something else. When I was a boy I had a knack28 at versing, which came rather in anticipation29 of the subjects to use it on. I exhausted30 Spring and Morning and Snow and Memory, and the whole range of mythological31 topics, and then I had my knack lying idle. I observed that there was one subject that the other poets found inexhaustible, but somehow I felt myself disqualified for treating it. How could I sing of Love when I had never been in love? For I didn't count those youthful affairs when I was only in the Third Reader and the first part of the Arithmetic. I went about trying to be in love, as a matter of business; but I couldn't manage it. Suddenly it managed itself; and then I found myself worse disqualified than ever. I didn't want to mention it; either to myself or to her, much less to the world at large. It seemed a little too personal."

"Oh, uncle! How funny you are!"

"Do you think so? I didn't think it much fun then, and I don't now. Once I didn't know what love was, and now I've forgotten!"

"No such thing, uncle! You write about it beautifully, even if you're not very virile or epigrammatic or passionate32. I won't let you say so."

"Well, then, my dear, if I haven't forgotten, I'm not interested. You see, I know so much more about it than my lovers do. I can't take their point of view any longer. To tell you the truth, I don't care a rap whether they get married or not. In that story there, that you've been reading, I got awfully tired of the girl. She was such a fool, and the fellow was a perfect donkey."

"But he was the dearest donkey in the world! I wanted to h—shake hands with him, and I wanted to kiss—yes, kiss!—her, she was such a lovable fool."

"You're very kind to say so, my dear, but you can't keep on making delightful idiots go down with the public. That was what I was thinking when you came in and found me looking so dismal33. I had stopped in the middle of a most exciting scene because I had discovered that I was poking34 fun at my lovers."

"And here I," the girl lamented35, "didn't take the slightest notice, but began on you with the harshest criticisms!"

"I didn't mind. I dare say it was for my good."

"I'm sure I meant it so, uncle. And what are you going to do about it?"

"Well, I must get a new point of view."

"Yes?"

"I must change my ground altogether. I can't pretend any longer to be the contemporary of my lovers, or to have the least sympathy with their hopes and fears. If I were to be perfectly honest with them, I should tell them, perhaps, that disappointed love was the best thing that could happen to either of them, but, if they insisted on happiness, that a good broken engagement promised more of it than anything else I could think of."

"That is true," the girl sighed. "There are a great many unhappy marriages. Of course, people would say it was rather pessimistic, wouldn't they?"

"People will say anything. One mustn't mind them. But now I'll tell you what I've been thinking all the time we've been talking."

"Well? I knew you were not thinking of my nonsense!"

"It was very good nonsense, as nonsense goes, my dear. What I've been thinking is that I must still have the love interest in my books, and have it the main interest, but I must treat it from the vantage-ground of age; it must be something I look back upon, and a little down upon."

"I see what you mean," the girl dissentingly assented.

"I must be in the whole secret—the secret, not merely of my lovers' love, but the secret of love itself. I must know, and I must subtly intimate, that it doesn't really matter to anybody how their affair turns out; for in a few years, twenty or thirty years, it's a thousand to one that they won't care anything about it themselves. I must maintain the attitude of the sage17, dealing36 not unkindly but truthfully with the situation."

"It would be rather sad," the girl murmured. "But one likes sad things."

"When one is young, one does; when one is old, one likes true things. But, of course, my love-stories would be only for those who have outlived love. I ought to be fair with my readers, and forewarn them that my story was not for the young, the hopeful, the happy."

The girl jumped to her feet and stood magnificent. "Uncle! It's grand!"

He rose, too. "What is?" he faltered37.

"The idea! Don't you see? You can have the publisher announce it as a story for the disillusioned38, the wretched, and the despairing, and that would make every girl want it, for that's what every girl thinks she is, and they would talk to the men about it, and then they would want it, and it would be the book of the month! Don't say another word. Oh, you dear!" In spite of the insanitary nature of the action, she caught her uncle round the neck, and kissed him on his bald spot, and ran out of the room. She opened the door to call back: "Don't lose a single minute. Begin it now!"

But the Veteran Novelist sank again into his chair in the posture39 in which she had surprised him.


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1 pensively 0f673d10521fb04c1a2f12fdf08f9f8c     
adv.沉思地,焦虑地
参考例句:
  • Garton pensively stirred the hotchpotch of his hair. 加顿沉思着搅动自己的乱发。 来自辞典例句
  • "Oh, me,'said Carrie, pensively. "I wish I could live in such a place." “唉,真的,"嘉莉幽幽地说,"我真想住在那种房子里。” 来自英汉文学 - 嘉莉妹妹
2 nominally a449bd0900819694017a87f9891f2cff     
在名义上,表面地; 应名儿
参考例句:
  • Dad, nominally a Methodist, entered Churches only for weddings and funerals. 爸名义上是卫理公会教徒,可只去教堂参加婚礼和葬礼。
  • The company could not indicate a person even nominally responsible for staff training. 该公司甚至不能指出一个名义上负责职员培训的人。
3 assented 4cee1313bb256a1f69bcc83867e78727     
同意,赞成( assent的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • The judge assented to allow the prisoner to speak. 法官同意允许犯人申辩。
  • "No," assented Tom, "they don't kill the women -- they're too noble. “对,”汤姆表示赞同地说,“他们不杀女人——真伟大!
4 kindly tpUzhQ     
adj.和蔼的,温和的,爽快的;adv.温和地,亲切地
参考例句:
  • Her neighbours spoke of her as kindly and hospitable.她的邻居都说她和蔼可亲、热情好客。
  • A shadow passed over the kindly face of the old woman.一道阴影掠过老太太慈祥的面孔。
5 elastically 9fa8d151a3686fe83c660c4814bb483c     
adv.有弹性地,伸缩自如地
参考例句:
  • The ring of onlookers distended and closed again elastically. 围观的一圈人散开了,接着又弹簧一般聚拢来。 来自辞典例句
  • Science teacher's role should change elastically and multiply depending on the instruction context. 教师的角色宜视教学情境脉络做弹性及多元的转换。 来自互联网
6 virile JUrzR     
adj.男性的;有男性生殖力的;有男子气概的;强有力的
参考例句:
  • She loved the virile young swimmer.她爱上了那个有男子气概的年轻游泳运动员。
  • He wanted his sons to become strong,virile,and athletic like himself.他希望他的儿子们能长得像他一样强壮、阳刚而又健美。
7 precisely zlWzUb     
adv.恰好,正好,精确地,细致地
参考例句:
  • It's precisely that sort of slick sales-talk that I mistrust.我不相信的正是那种油腔滑调的推销宣传。
  • The man adjusted very precisely.那个人调得很准。
8 relentless VBjzv     
adj.残酷的,不留情的,无怜悯心的
参考例句:
  • The traffic noise is relentless.交通车辆的噪音一刻也不停止。
  • Their training has to be relentless.他们的训练必须是无情的。
9 awfully MPkym     
adv.可怕地,非常地,极端地
参考例句:
  • Agriculture was awfully neglected in the past.过去农业遭到严重忽视。
  • I've been feeling awfully bad about it.对这我一直感到很难受。
10 trample 9Jmz0     
vt.踩,践踏;无视,伤害,侵犯
参考例句:
  • Don't trample on the grass. 勿踏草地。
  • Don't trample on the flowers when you play in the garden. 在花园里玩耍时,不要踩坏花。
11 hop vdJzL     
n.单脚跳,跳跃;vi.单脚跳,跳跃;着手做某事;vt.跳跃,跃过
参考例句:
  • The children had a competition to see who could hop the fastest.孩子们举行比赛,看谁单足跳跃最快。
  • How long can you hop on your right foot?你用右脚能跳多远?
12 severely SiCzmk     
adv.严格地;严厉地;非常恶劣地
参考例句:
  • He was severely criticized and removed from his post.他受到了严厉的批评并且被撤了职。
  • He is severely put down for his careless work.他因工作上的粗心大意而受到了严厉的批评。
13 disposition GljzO     
n.性情,性格;意向,倾向;排列,部署
参考例句:
  • He has made a good disposition of his property.他已对财产作了妥善处理。
  • He has a cheerful disposition.他性情开朗。
14 shuffle xECzc     
n.拖著脚走,洗纸牌;v.拖曳,慢吞吞地走
参考例句:
  • I wish you'd remember to shuffle before you deal.我希望在你发牌前记得洗牌。
  • Don't shuffle your feet along.别拖着脚步走。
15 idyllic lk1yv     
adj.质朴宜人的,田园风光的
参考例句:
  • These scenes had an idyllic air.这种情景多少有点田园气氛。
  • Many people living in big cities yearn for an idyllic country life.现在的很多都市人向往那种田园化的生活。
16 delightful 6xzxT     
adj.令人高兴的,使人快乐的
参考例句:
  • We had a delightful time by the seashore last Sunday.上星期天我们在海滨玩得真痛快。
  • Peter played a delightful melody on his flute.彼得用笛子吹奏了一支欢快的曲子。
17 sage sCUz2     
n.圣人,哲人;adj.贤明的,明智的
参考例句:
  • I was grateful for the old man's sage advice.我很感激那位老人贤明的忠告。
  • The sage is the instructor of a hundred ages.这位哲人是百代之师。
18 distinguished wu9z3v     
adj.卓越的,杰出的,著名的
参考例句:
  • Elephants are distinguished from other animals by their long noses.大象以其长长的鼻子显示出与其他动物的不同。
  • A banquet was given in honor of the distinguished guests.宴会是为了向贵宾们致敬而举行的。
19 virility JUKzS     
n.雄劲,丈夫气
参考例句:
  • He wanted his sons to become strong,virile,and athletic like himself.他希望他的儿子们能长得像他一样强壮、阳刚而又健美。
  • He is a tall,virile man with rugged good looks.他是个身材高大、体魄健壮、相貌粗犷英俊的男子。
20 speck sFqzM     
n.微粒,小污点,小斑点
参考例句:
  • I have not a speck of interest in it.我对它没有任何兴趣。
  • The sky is clear and bright without a speck of cloud.天空晴朗,一星星云彩也没有。
21 caresses 300460a787072f68f3ae582060ed388a     
爱抚,抚摸( caress的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • A breeze caresses the cheeks. 微风拂面。
  • Hetty was not sufficiently familiar with caresses or outward demonstrations of fondness. 海蒂不习惯于拥抱之类过于外露地表现自己的感情。
22 brutally jSRya     
adv.残忍地,野蛮地,冷酷无情地
参考例句:
  • The uprising was brutally put down.起义被残酷地镇压下去了。
  • A pro-democracy uprising was brutally suppressed.一场争取民主的起义被残酷镇压了。
23 perfectly 8Mzxb     
adv.完美地,无可非议地,彻底地
参考例句:
  • The witnesses were each perfectly certain of what they said.证人们个个对自己所说的话十分肯定。
  • Everything that we're doing is all perfectly above board.我们做的每件事情都是光明正大的。
24 vividly tebzrE     
adv.清楚地,鲜明地,生动地
参考例句:
  • The speaker pictured the suffering of the poor vividly.演讲者很生动地描述了穷人的生活。
  • The characters in the book are vividly presented.这本书里的人物写得栩栩如生。
25 wink 4MGz3     
n.眨眼,使眼色,瞬间;v.眨眼,使眼色,闪烁
参考例句:
  • He tipped me the wink not to buy at that price.他眨眼暗示我按那个价格就不要买。
  • The satellite disappeared in a wink.瞬息之间,那颗卫星就消失了。
26 raving c42d0882009d28726dc86bae11d3aaa7     
adj.说胡话的;疯狂的,怒吼的;非常漂亮的;令人醉心[痴心]的v.胡言乱语(rave的现在分词)n.胡话;疯话adv.胡言乱语地;疯狂地
参考例句:
  • The man's a raving lunatic. 那个男子是个语无伦次的疯子。
  • When I told her I'd crashed her car, she went stark raving bonkers. 我告诉她我把她的车撞坏了时,她暴跳如雷。
27 entreated 945bd967211682a0f50f01c1ca215de3     
恳求,乞求( entreat的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • They entreated and threatened, but all this seemed of no avail. 他们时而恳求,时而威胁,但这一切看来都没有用。
  • 'One word,' the Doctor entreated. 'Will you tell me who denounced him?' “还有一个问题,”医生请求道,“你可否告诉我是谁告发他的?” 来自英汉文学 - 双城记
28 knack Jx9y4     
n.诀窍,做事情的灵巧的,便利的方法
参考例句:
  • He has a knack of teaching arithmetic.他教算术有诀窍。
  • Making omelettes isn't difficult,but there's a knack to it.做煎蛋饼并不难,但有窍门。
29 anticipation iMTyh     
n.预期,预料,期望
参考例句:
  • We waited at the station in anticipation of her arrival.我们在车站等着,期待她的到来。
  • The animals grew restless as if in anticipation of an earthquake.各种动物都变得焦躁不安,像是感到了地震即将发生。
30 exhausted 7taz4r     
adj.极其疲惫的,精疲力尽的
参考例句:
  • It was a long haul home and we arrived exhausted.搬运回家的这段路程特别长,到家时我们已筋疲力尽。
  • Jenny was exhausted by the hustle of city life.珍妮被城市生活的忙乱弄得筋疲力尽。
31 mythological BFaxL     
adj.神话的
参考例句:
  • He is remembered for his historical and mythological works. 他以其带有历史感和神话色彩的作品而著称。
  • But even so, the cumulative process had for most Americans a deep, almost mythological significance. 不过即使如此,移民渐增的过程,对于大部分美国人,还是意味深长的,几乎有不可思议的影响。
32 passionate rLDxd     
adj.热情的,热烈的,激昂的,易动情的,易怒的,性情暴躁的
参考例句:
  • He is said to be the most passionate man.据说他是最有激情的人。
  • He is very passionate about the project.他对那个项目非常热心。
33 dismal wtwxa     
adj.阴沉的,凄凉的,令人忧郁的,差劲的
参考例句:
  • That is a rather dismal melody.那是一支相当忧郁的歌曲。
  • My prospects of returning to a suitable job are dismal.我重新找到一个合适的工作岗位的希望很渺茫。
34 poking poking     
n. 刺,戳,袋 vt. 拨开,刺,戳 vi. 戳,刺,捅,搜索,伸出,行动散慢
参考例句:
  • He was poking at the rubbish with his stick. 他正用手杖拨动垃圾。
  • He spent his weekends poking around dusty old bookshops. 他周末都泡在布满尘埃的旧书店里。
35 lamented b6ae63144a98bc66c6a97351aea85970     
adj.被哀悼的,令人遗憾的v.(为…)哀悼,痛哭,悲伤( lament的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • her late lamented husband 她那令人怀念的已故的丈夫
  • We lamented over our bad luck. 我们为自己的不幸而悲伤。 来自《简明英汉词典》
36 dealing NvjzWP     
n.经商方法,待人态度
参考例句:
  • This store has an excellent reputation for fair dealing.该商店因买卖公道而享有极高的声誉。
  • His fair dealing earned our confidence.他的诚实的行为获得我们的信任。
37 faltered d034d50ce5a8004ff403ab402f79ec8d     
(嗓音)颤抖( falter的过去式和过去分词 ); 支吾其词; 蹒跚; 摇晃
参考例句:
  • He faltered out a few words. 他支吾地说出了几句。
  • "Er - but he has such a longhead!" the man faltered. 他不好意思似的嚅嗫着:“这孩子脑袋真长。”
38 disillusioned Qufz7J     
a.不再抱幻想的,大失所望的,幻想破灭的
参考例句:
  • I soon became disillusioned with the job. 我不久便对这个工作不再抱幻想了。
  • Many people who are disillusioned in reality assimilate life to a dream. 许多对现实失望的人把人生比作一场梦。
39 posture q1gzk     
n.姿势,姿态,心态,态度;v.作出某种姿势
参考例句:
  • The government adopted an uncompromising posture on the issue of independence.政府在独立这一问题上采取了毫不妥协的态度。
  • He tore off his coat and assumed a fighting posture.他脱掉上衣,摆出一副打架的架势。


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