Tchichikoff began to speak, but his argument was of a very obscure nature; he alluded3 in very general terms to the whole Russian Empire, and expressed himself in terms of great praise about its territorial4 extent, and said, that even the ancient Roman Empire was far less in extent and power, and that other nations are justly surprised at the magnitude of the largest Empire in the world.
Sobakevitch continued to listen, with his head bent on one side.
And that, according to existing statutes5 of this vast empire—the grandeur6 of which has no equal—the census7 population, namely, those who have to pay a capitation tax, though hundreds and thousands of them have already, since then; terminated their worldly existence, remain still upon the lists, and are taxed until the next census be taken—a period of fifty years—on a par2 with the living; although, and it must not be forgotten, that, as a medium of equalization, the new-born population within the space of these fifty years is not liable to any taxation8 before the next census be taken again; and this was done for the purpose of not over-burthening the imperial administrations with too many difficult and tedious regulations, but principally to avoid as far as possible any additional complication of the already over-complicated mechanism9 of the imperial administrations.
Sobakevitch still listened with his head bent on one side.
And, that notwithstanding the justice and efficiency of this measure, it yet presented but too numerous instances of heavy burthen and great expense to the majority of landed proprietors10, obliging them to pay the tax for both their dead serfs as well as for their living subjects, and that he, Tchichikoff, feeling a particular and personal regard for him, Sobakevitch, was willing to undertake the payment of this burthensome capitation tax for the dead, in consequence of his unfeigned esteem11 and friendship for him. As regards the principal objects themselves, Tchichikoff expressed himself very carefully indeed; in alluding12 to them, he never called them dead serfs, but not existing, poor souls.
During the whole period of Tchichikoff's speech, Sobakevitch had continued to listen silently as before, with his head slightly inclined on one side, and not even once was there the slightest change in his countenance13, or a different expression visible in his face. It seemed as if this body had no soul, or as if it was not at all where it ought to have been; like an indefatigable14 miser15, he seemed to have hidden it in some secret corner, and covered with such an impenetrable shell, that whatever battered16 upon its surface could not stir or move the kernel17 within.
"And thus," said Tchichikoff, awaiting a reply with some degree of anxious expectation.
"You want some dead serfs?" demanded Sobakevitch, simply, without the slightest emotion or surprise, as if the question was about bread, salt, or meat.
"Yes," answered Tchichikoff; and again he softened18 down the expression, adding, "the non existing ones."
"I can let you have some; why not?" said Sobakevitch.
"And, since you have some, I have no doubt you will be glad to get rid of them?"
"With pleasure; I am ready to sell them," said Sobakevitch, whilst slightly raising his head, for he began to suspect that the purchaser would undoubtedly19 know how to derive20 an advantage from his speculation21.
"The devil!" thought Tchichikoff to himself, "this man wants to sell them before I have made him an offer to purchase any!" and he then said aloud: "And what would your price he? although I must confess that the objects are such, that it is rather strange to speak of a price."
"Well then, and in order not to ask a high price from you, I will fix them at a hundred roubles a-piece," said Sobakevitch.
"A hundred roubles!" exclaimed Tchichikoff, opening his mouth widely, and looking him straight into the eyes, not knowing whether he had heard rightly, or whether Sobakevitch's tongue, prompted by his heavy intelligence, had tripped, and pronounced accidentally one word for another.
"Well, is that too dear for you?" articulated Sobakevitch; and then he added: "But allow me to ask, what would your price be?"
"My price! We have, no doubt, misunderstood one another; we seem to have forgotten what our subject is. As far as I am concerned, and laying my hand upon my heart, one rouble would be the fairest price I could offer you."
"Halloa! what a ridiculous price, to be sure, one rouble!"
"Why, according to my judgment22, and as I think, I could not give more."
"But remember, I do not sell you any cat's-paws."
"However, you must agree; they are not any real men."
"That is your opinion; but go and find me such a fool, who would agree to sell you a census serf for a single rouble."
"But allow me to ask you, why do you call them census serfs? They are dead long since, nothing remains23 of them but an incomprehensible sound in their appellation24. However, in order to avoid the trouble of entering more particularly in a discussion on abstract matters, I am ready to offer you one rouble and a half, but more I really could not."
"You ought to be ashamed to offer me such a price! You like to drive a bargain; well then, tell me your real price."
"I really cannot offer you more, my dear Michael Semenovitch, believe me, on my honour, I cannot. What cannot be done that might be done?' said Tchichikoff; yet, notwithstanding, he made an addition of half a rouble.
"Why are you so niggardly25?" said Sobakevitch; "it is really not dear. Another scoundrel would cheat you; he would not sell you real serfs like I do, but some worthless stuff; all mine are like green hazel-nuts, all picked men; and if they are not artizans by profession, still they are strong, healthy, and fit for everything. Just let us examine them a little. There is, for an example, my former cart-maker26, Micheeff; he never worked at anything less than a spring-cart. And, if you please, not such workmanship as they sell you at Moscow, which lasts for an hour, and not longer; oh no, his work was of first-rate durability27, and besides, he used to do the carving28 and polishing work as well."
Tchichikoff opened his mouth, with the intention of making the observation, that the peasant Micheeff, the spring-cart maker, had already left this world for some time; but Sobakevitch entered suddenly, as the phrase goes, with spirit into the nature of the subject, Heaven only knows whence he derived29 his power of language and vigour30 of expression; however, he continued:
"And my Stephan, the joiner! I'd wager31 my head, that you cannot find me another peasant like he was. He was a regular Hercules! If he had served in the guards, he would have been one of the finest soldiers in the regiment32, he was above seven feet high!"
Tchichikoff was again on the point of making the observation, that Stephan had also departed this world; but Sobakevitch, as it appeared, was carried away by his subject, his flow of language was not easily to be stopped, now was the time to listen to him.
"Milushkin, the potter, was capable of putting you a stove in any part of the house. Again, Maxim33 Teliatnikoff, the shoemaker; whatever he pierced with his awl34, became a pair of boots, and whatever boots he made, for such I paid him the compliment of a thank you. And Germei Sorokopleokin! I can assure you that this fellow alone was worth all the others, he used to hawk35 about in Moscow, and paid me an annual quit-rent of five hundred roubles. Such were the people, and far from such stuff as you might buy from a fellow like Pluschkin."
"But allow me to observe," Tchichikoff at last said, quite bewildered by such an abundance of words, to which there promised now to be no end, "why do you enumerate36 all their former professions? all these qualities are of no use to them or others now, because all these people are dead, at this time being."
"Oh, yes, to be sure, they are dead," said Sobakevitch, as if considering and recollecting37 suddenly, that they were in reality all dead and gone, and then he added, "however, I must observe, what are the people now reckoned as living? yes, what are these people? flies, but not men!"
"But for all that they exist, and that is a point of imagination."
"Oh no, not at all a point of imagination! I will describe to you what a fellow my Micheeff was, and I am sure you will not be able to find many more like him; he was of such a size, that he could not have entered this room, and that is no point of imagination! And in his shoulders, he possessed38 such power as you will rarely meet with in a horse; I am therefore curious to know where you could find such another point of imagination?"
"No, really, I could not offer you any more than two roubles," Tchichikoff said again.
"Very well, then, and in order to be agreeable to you, and that you might not pretend that I demanded too high a price, and that I would not oblige you, you shall have them at seventy-five roubles each dead serf, but all in bank notes, and I really do it all out of friendship for you."
"Does he really take me for a fool," thought Tchichikoff to himself, and then added aloud: "All this seems very strange to me; it would appear that we are playing a comedy, else I really could not explain how—you seem to be a man of sound judgment, you can pretend to a superior education, don't you therefore see and understand, that the object in question is simply, phu, phu! what is it really worth? who could make use of it?"
"But you wish to purchase them, I think it therefore obvious that you want them."
When Tchichikoff heard this, he bit his lips, and could not find an answer. He began to mutter something about family connexions and household circumstances, but Sobakevitch interrupted him, and said simply:
"I do not want to know anything about your circumstances, I never mix in family concerns, all that is your own affair. You stand in want of serfs, I am ready to sell some, and I may add, you will be dissatisfied with yourself if you don't buy them of me."
"Well then, two roubles," said Tchichikoff.
"What a curious man you are; you seem to have fixed39 upon two, and now you cannot get off them. Offer me your last price."
"May the devil take him," thought Tchichikoff to himself, "I will give him half a rouble more, and make the proverb true, for the dog to buy nuts with!
"Very well then, I offer you half a rouble more."
"Now then, I will also tell you my last word; fifty roubles I really it is a loss to me, you will not buy them cheaper anywhere, especially such excellent peasants as they were!"
"What a fist that man is to be sure," said Tchichikoff to himself, and then he continued aloud with a slight degree of anger:
"Really, I must confess, it was ridiculous to treat the matter as serious, because in many another place I could get dead serfs for nothing. Many a one would be extremely glad to give them to me, and thus get rid of them as soon as possible. A fool would he be indeed, who after my offer would still persist to keep them and continue to pay the capitation tax."
"But do you know also, that purchases of this description—I say this between ourselves, and in good friendship—are not always safe and practicable; and if I, or any one else was to mention them to a third party, such a person could get himself into great difficulties, and expose himself to lose all confidence for the future, as regards trust in contracts or any other business transactions."
"Oh, the rascal40, that is what he is aiming at," thought Tchichikoff, and here he spoke41 with an air of great unconcern, "as you like, my dear Sir, I wish to buy them, not for any particular purpose, as you seem to suppose, but simply from a fancy, an inclination42 of my own. If you won't accept two roubles and a half then, fare you well!"
"I shall not be able to confuse him: he is obstinate," thought Sobakevitch. "Heaven be with you! give me thirty and take them all!"
"No, I perceive you don't wish to sell them. Farewell!"
"Stop, stop! wait a little!" exclaimed Sobakevitch, holding him by the hand, and treading upon his feet, because our hero had forgotten to take care of himself, and as a punishment for it, he was obliged to limp upon one leg.
"I beg your pardon! It seems I have hurt you. Pray be seated here. I beg your pardon once more."
Hereupon he made him sit down again and rather cleverly too, as a bear would do who has been already taught to perform some evolution.
"Really, I think I am only losing my time; besides I am in a hurry."
"Pray sit down, if but for a moment. I will tell you immediately something very pleasant."
Hereupon, Sobakevitch seated himself quite dose to Tchichikoff, and whispered into his ear, as if a secret:
"Will you make it a quarter?"
"That is to say, twenty-five roubles. No, no, no, I will not even give you a quarter of a quarter. I will not give you an additional copek."
Sobakevitch remained silent; Tchichikoff did the same.
This silence lasted for about two minutes. The Grecian hero Kolokotroni looked very seriously from his frame on the wall upon the bargaining parties below.
"What will really be your last price?" said Sobakevitch at last.
"Two roubles and a half."
"Really a human soul seemed to have with you no greater value than a dried beetroot. Give me at least three roubles."
"I cannot."
"Well! what am I to do with you? You shall have them. It is a loss to me, and no mistake; but such is my doggish nature, I could never refuse to be agreeable to my fellow-creatures. But I think I am right in saying that it will be requisite43 to draw up a contract of sale for the lawful44 settlement of the bargain."
"Most certainly."
"In that case, I shall have to go to Smolensk," said Sobakevitch.
Thus then the bargain for Sobakevitch's dead serfs was concluded. They agreed to meet the next day in town, and to settle all the formalities of the contract of sale at their first meeting there.
Tchichikoff now demanded a list of all the dead serfs that were to become his property. To this request Sobakevitch agreed willingly, and sat down immediately at his writing-desk, and wrote down not only the names of every one but also their laudable qualifications.
"The note is ready," Sobakevitch soon said as he turned round.
"Heady? Allow me to look at it." Tchichikoff took the paper in his hand, and whilst running his eyes over it, he was surprised to behold45 its neatness and accuracy; not only were profession, name, age and family estate minutely noted46 down, but there was even a special column in which particular annotations47 had been made as regarded the degree of morality and conduct of his deceased serfs; in a word, it was a real pleasure to look at the document.
"Now I hope you will have no objection to pay me a god-penny," said Sobakevitch.
"Why should I give you anything on account? You shall receive the whole amount at once, on our first meeting in town."
"You well know that such is the custom with us in the country," replied Sobakevitch.
"I really do not know how I am to manage that, for I have not much money about me. However, here is a ten-rouble note."
"What are ten roubles? Give me at least fifty."
Tchichikoff wanted to make him believe that he could not spare any more for the present; but Sobakevitch insisted so positively48 that he had some more money about him, that he could not help producing another bank-note, and saying:
"Very well, then, since you insist upon having some more, here are fifteen more, which makes it altogether twenty-five roubles. But allow me now to trouble you for a receipt."
"What do you want a receipt for?"
"You know well it is better to have a receipt for the payment of money. Our hours of existence are uncertain—something might happen."
"Very well, let me have the money."
"Why should you have the money first? I hold the notes here in my hand. As soon as you will have written the receipt, in that same moment you may have the money."
"Pardon me; how am I to write out a receipt? I must first see the money."
Tchichikoff allowed the bank-notes to be taken from his hand, and Sobakevitch being now in possession of them, approached the table and covering them with his left hand, began to write out with his right the receipt upon a small piece of paper, that he had received an account of twenty-five roubles in imperial bank-notes for a number of serfs sold by him to Pavel Ivanovitch Tchichikoff. After having written and signed the receipt, he once more examined the bank-notes.
"This note is a rather old one," remarked he, slowly, whilst carefully examining one of them against the light; "a little tom also. However, we must not look upon these trifles when we deal with friends."
"Oh! you fist, you fist!" thought Tchichikoff to himself, "and a beast besides."
"By the bye, would you perhaps like to have some of my females?"
"No, I am very much obliged to you for the offer all the same."
"I should not have asked a high price; out of regard for you, I would not charge more than a rouble a-piece."
"No, I do not stand in want of any of the female sex."
"Well, if you cannot make any use of them, then it is useless to speak another word-about them. It is impossible to dispute on matter of colour and taste. 'The one likes the pope, the other his wife,' as our proverb says."
"Oh, I nearly forgot to ask you to keep this little transaction a secret between ourselves," said Tchichikoff in taking leave.
"Oh yes, this is perfectly49 understood. It is useless to mix a third in this matter; that which happens by common consent between intimate friends, must remain in their friendship. Farewell! I was glad to see you. Do not forget me in future. If you should have an hour to spare, come and dine and pass a little time with us. It might again happen that we could be agreeable one to another."
"Don't you believe it!" thought Tchichikoff to himself, whilst taking his seat in the britchka. "He has charged me two roubles and a half for each of his dead serfs! the man is the devil's own fist!"
When the britchka had left the court-yard of the house, Tchichikoff turned round to cast a last glance around him, and in looking back, he saw that Sobakevitch still stood upon the door-step of his house, and, as it seemed, was looking out to see what turning his guest was about to take.
"The fist, he is still on the same spot," murmured Tchichikoff between his teeth, and ordered Selifan, who had just turned in the direction of the village, to drive his carriage in such a manner that they should not be seen from the gentleman's house.
He intended calling at Pluschkin's, whose serfs, according to the words of Sobakevitch were dying like flies, but he did not wish that Sobakevitch should know about it. When the britchka had passed the last house in the village, he hailed the first peasant whom he happened to see, and who was carrying a large log of wood upon his shoulders, like an indefatigable ant towards his dwelling50, and addressed him thus:
"Halloa, my bearded man! how can I drive to Pluschkin's estate, without passing your master's house?"
The mouzhik seemed 'obviously embarrassed at the question.
"Well, don't you know?"
"No, your glory, I don't."
"Eh, what a fellow you are! And with all that you wear grey hair and beard! don't you know the miser Pluschkin, who has the reputation of starving his peasants?"
"Ah, you mean the ragged51 one!" exclaimed the peasant. He then added another stronger surname, but as it is an expression not used in society, we will omit it, though it was a strong and harmonizing word with the first surname of the miser. It might be easily imagined that the second surname must have been a very pointed52 one indeed, for although the peasant had passed on, and the britchka had been long out of sight from the village, Tchichikoff was still smiling at the word whilst sitting in his britchka.
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1
bent
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| n.爱好，癖好；adj.弯的；决心的，一心的 | |
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par
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| n.标准，票面价值，平均数量；adj.票面的，平常的，标准的 | |
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alluded
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| 提及，暗指( allude的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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territorial
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| adj.领土的，领地的 | |
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5
statutes
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| 成文法( statute的名词复数 )； 法令； 法规； 章程 | |
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6
grandeur
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| n.伟大，崇高，宏伟，庄严，豪华 | |
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census
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| n.(官方的)人口调查，人口普查 | |
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8
taxation
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| n.征税，税收，税金 | |
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mechanism
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| n.机械装置；机构，结构 | |
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proprietors
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| n.所有人，业主( proprietor的名词复数 ) | |
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esteem
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| n.尊敬，尊重；vt.尊重，敬重；把…看作 | |
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12
alluding
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| 提及，暗指( allude的现在分词 ) | |
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countenance
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| n.脸色，面容；面部表情；vt.支持，赞同 | |
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indefatigable
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| adj.不知疲倦的，不屈不挠的 | |
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miser
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| n.守财奴，吝啬鬼 (adj.miserly) | |
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battered
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| adj.磨损的；v.连续猛击；磨损 | |
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kernel
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| n.(果实的)核，仁；(问题)的中心，核心 | |
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18
softened
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| （使）变软( soften的过去式和过去分词 )； 缓解打击； 缓和； 安慰 | |
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undoubtedly
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| adv.确实地，无疑地 | |
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derive
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| v.取得；导出；引申；来自；源自；出自 | |
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speculation
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| n.思索，沉思；猜测；投机 | |
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judgment
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| n.审判；判断力，识别力，看法，意见 | |
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remains
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| n.剩余物，残留物；遗体，遗迹 | |
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appellation
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| n.名称，称呼 | |
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niggardly
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| adj.吝啬的，很少的 | |
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maker
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| n.制造者，制造商 | |
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durability
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| n.经久性，耐用性 | |
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carving
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| n.雕刻品，雕花 | |
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29
derived
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| vi.起源；由来；衍生；导出v.得到( derive的过去式和过去分词 )；（从…中）得到获得；源于；（从…中）提取 | |
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vigour
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| （=vigor）n.智力，体力，精力 | |
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wager
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| n.赌注；vt.押注，打赌 | |
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32
regiment
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| n.团，多数，管理；v.组织，编成团，统制 | |
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maxim
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| n.格言，箴言 | |
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awl
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| n.尖钻 | |
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hawk
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| n.鹰，骗子；鹰派成员 | |
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36
enumerate
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| v.列举，计算，枚举，数 | |
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recollecting
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| v.记起，想起( recollect的现在分词 ) | |
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possessed
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| adj.疯狂的；拥有的，占有的 | |
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fixed
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| adj.固定的，不变的，准备好的；(计算机)固定的 | |
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rascal
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| n.流氓；不诚实的人 | |
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41
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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42
inclination
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| n.倾斜；点头；弯腰；斜坡；倾度；倾向；爱好 | |
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43
requisite
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| adj.需要的，必不可少的；n.必需品 | |
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44
lawful
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| adj.法律许可的，守法的，合法的 | |
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45
behold
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| v.看，注视，看到 | |
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noted
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| adj.著名的，知名的 | |
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47
annotations
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| n.注释( annotation的名词复数 )；附注 | |
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48
positively
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| adv.明确地，断然，坚决地；实在，确实 | |
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49
perfectly
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| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
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50
dwelling
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| n.住宅，住所，寓所 | |
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51
ragged
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| adj.衣衫褴褛的，粗糙的，刺耳的 | |
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52
pointed
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| adj.尖的，直截了当的 | |
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