The boy had steadily1 grown in strength and beauty of body and mind. The Doctor persuaded her to spend one more winter basking2 in his sun-parlor and finishing the final chapters of his book. Her mind was singularly clever and helpful in the interpretation3 of the experiences and emotions of motherhood.
She had stubbornly resisted every suggestion to see her husband or allow him to see the child. The Doctor had managed twice to give Jim an hour with the baby while she had gone to Asheville on shopping trips. He was rewarded for his trouble in the devotion with which the young father worshiped his son. The Doctor watched the slumbering4 fires kindle5 in the man's deep blue eyes with increasing wonder at the strength and tenderness of his newfound soul.
Jim had completed the furnishing of the bungalow6 with the advice and guidance of his friend, and every room stood ready and waiting for its mistress. He had insisted on making every piece of furniture for Mary's room and the nursery adjoining. The Doctor was amazed at the mechanical genius he displayed in its construction. He had taken a month's instruction at a cabinet maker's in Asheville and the bed, bureau, tables and chairs which he had turned out were astonishingly beautiful. Their lines were copied from old models and each piece was a work of art. The iron work was even more tastefully and beautifully wrought7. He had toiled8 day and night with an enthusiasm and patience that gave the physician a new revelation in the possibility of the development of human character.
His friend came at last with a cheering message. He began smilingly:
“I'm going to make the big fight today, boy, to get her to see you.”
“You think she will?”
“There's a good chance. Her savings9 have all been used up from her bank account in New York. She is determined10 to go to her father in Kentucky. I'll have a talk with her, bring her over to the bungalow, show her through it on the pretext11 of its model construction and then you can tell her that you built it with your own hands for her and the baby. You might be loafing around the place about that time.”
Jim's hand was suddenly lifted.
“I got ye, Doc, I got ye! I'll be there—all day.”
“Don't let her see you until I give the signal.”
“Caution's my name.”
“We'll see what happens.”
Jim pressed close.
“Say, Doc, if you know how to pray, I wish you'd send up a little word for me while you're talkin' to her. Could ye now?”
“I'll do my best for you, boy—and I think you've got a chance. She's been watching the blue eyes of that baby lately with a rather curious look of unrest.”
“They're just like mine, ain't they?” Jim broke in with pride.
“Time has softened12 the old hurt,” the Doctor went on. “The boy may win for you——”
The square jaw13 came together with a smash.
“Gee—I hope so. I'll wait there all day for you and I'm goin' to try my own hand at a little prayer or two on the side while I'm waiting. Maybe God'll think He's hit me hard enough by this time to give me another trial.”
With a friendly wave of his hand the Doctor hurried home.
He found Mary seated under the rose trellis beside the drive, watching for his coming. The day was still and warm for the end of April. Birds were singing and chattering14 in every branch and tree. A quail15 on the top fence-rail of the wheat field called loudly to his mate.
The boy was screaming his joy over a new wagon16 to which Aunt Abbie had hitched17 his goat. He drove by in style, lifted his chubby18 hand to his mother and shouted:
“Dood-by, Doc-ter!”
The Doctor waved a smiling answer, and lapsed19 into a long silence.
He waked at last from his absorption to notice that Mary was day-dreaming. The fair brow was drawn20 into deep lines of brooding.
“Why shadows in your eyes a day like this, little mother?” he asked softly.
“Just thinking——”
“About a past that you should forget?”
“Yes and no,” she answered thoughtfully. “I was just thinking in this flood of spring sunlight of the mystery of my love for such a man as the one I married. How could it have been possible to really love him?”
“You are sure that you loved him?”
“Sure.”
“How did you know?”
“By all the signs. I trembled at his footstep. The touch of his hand, the sound of his voice thrilled me. I was drawn by a power that was resistless. I was mad with happiness those wonderful days that preceded our marriage. I was madder still during our honeymoon—until the shadows began to fall that fatal Christmas Eve.” She paused and her lips trembled. “Oh, Doctor, what is love?”
The drooping21 shoulders of the man bent22 lower. He picked up a pebble23 from the ground and flicked24 it carelessly across the drive, lifted his head at last and asked earnestly:
“Shall I tell you the truth?”
“Yes—your own particular brand, please—the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.”
“I'll try,” he began soberly. “If I were a poet, naturally I would use different language. As I'm only a prosaic25 doctor and physiologist26 I may shock your ideals a little.”
“No matter,” she interrupted. “They couldn't well get a harder jolt27 than they have had already.”
He nodded and went on:
“There are two elemental human forces that maintain life—hunger and love. They are both utterly28 simple, otherwise they could not be universal. Hunger compels the race to live. Love compels it to reproduce itself. There has never been anything mysterious about either of these forces and there never will be—except in the imagination of sentimentalists.
“Nature begins with hunger. For about thirteen years she first applies this force to the development of the body before she begins to lay the foundation of the second. Until this second development is complete the passion known as love cannot be experienced.
“What is this second development? Very simple again. At the base of the brain of every child there is a vacant space during the first twelve or fifteen years. During the age of twelve to fourteen in girls, thirteen to fifteen in boys, this vacant space is slowly filled by a new lobe29 of the brain and with its growth comes the consciousness of sex and the development of sex powers.
“This new nerve center becomes on maturity30 a powerful physical magnet. The moment this magnet comes into contact with an organization which answers its needs, as certain kinds of food answer the needs of hunger, violent desire is excited. If both these magnets should be equally powerful, the disturbance31 to both will be great. The longer the personal association is continued the more violent becomes this disturbance, until in highly sensitive natures it develops into an obsession32 which obscures reason and crushes the will.
“The meaning of this impulse is again very simple—the unconscious desire of the male to be a father, of the female to become a mother.”
“And there is but one man on earth who could thus affect me?” Mary asked excitedly.
“Rubbish! There are thousands.”
“Thousands?”
“Literally thousands. The reason you never happen to meet them is purely33 an accident of our poor social organization. Every woman has thousands of true physical mates if she could only meet them. Every man has thousands of true physical mates if he could only meet them. And in every such meeting, if mind and body are in normal condition, the same violent disturbance would result—whether married or single, free or bound.
“Marriage therefore is not based merely on the passion of love. It is a crime for any man or woman to marry without love. It is the sheerest insanity34 to believe that this passion within itself is sufficient to justify35 marriage. All who marry should love. Many love who should not marry.
“The institution of marriage is the great SOCIAL ordinance36 of the race. Its sanctity and perpetuity are not based on the violence of the passion of love, but something else.”
He paused and listened to the call of the quail again from the field.
“You hear that bob white calling his mate?”
“Yes—and she's answering him now very softly. I can hear them both.”
“They have mated this spring to build a home and rear a brood of young. Within six months their babies will all be full grown and next spring a new alignment37 of lovers will be made. Their marriage lasts during the period of infancy38 of their offspring. This is Nature's law.
“It happens in the case of man that the period of infancy of a human being is about twenty-four years. This is the most wonderful fact in nature. It means that the capacity of man for the improvement of his breed is practically limitless. A quail has a few months in which to rear her young. God gives to woman a quarter of a century in which to mold her immortal39 offspring. Because the period of infancy of one child covers the entire period of motherhood capacity, marriage binds40 for life, and the sanctity of marriage rests squarely on this law of Nature.”
He paused again and looked over the sunlit valley.
“I wish our boys and girls could all know these simple truths of their being. It would save much unhappiness and many tragic42 blunders.
“You were swept completely off your feet by the rush of the first emotion caused by meeting a man who was your physical mate. You imagined this emotion to be a mysterious revelation which can come but once. Your imagination in its excited condition, of course, gave to your first-found mate all sorts of divine attributes which he did not possess. You were `in love' with a puppet of your own creation, and hypnotized yourself into the delusion43 that James Anthony was your one and only mate, your knight44, your hero.
“In a very important sense this was true. Your intuitions could not make a mistake on so vital an issue. But you immediately rushed into marriage and your union has been perfected by the birth of a child. Whether you are happy or unhappy in marriage does not depend on the reality of love. Happiness in marriage is based on something else.”
“On what?”
“The joy and peace that comes from oneness of spirit, tastes, culture and character. I know this from the deepest experiences of life and the widest observation.”
“You have loved?” she asked softly.
“Twice——”
A silence fell between them.
“Shall I tell you, little mother?” he finally asked quietly.
“Please.”
He seated himself and looked into the skies beyond the peaks across the valley.
“Ten years ago I met my first mate. The meeting was fortunate for both. She was a woman of gentle birth, of beautiful spirit. Our courtship was ideal. We thought alike, we felt alike, she loved my profession even—an unusual trait in a woman. She thought it so noble in its aims that the petty jealousy45 that sometimes wrecks46 a doctor's life was to her an unthinkable crime. The first year was the nearest to heaven that I had ever gotten down here.
“And then, little mother, by one of those inexplicable47 mysteries of nature she died when our baby was born. For a while the light of the world went out. I quit New York, gave up my profession and came here just to lie in the sun on this mountainside and try to pull myself together. I didn't think life could ever be worth living again. But it was. I found about me so much of human need—so much ignorance and helplessness—so much to pity and love, I forgot the ache in my own heart in bringing joy to others.
“I had money enough. I gave up the ambitions of greed and strife48 and set my soul to higher tasks. For nine years I've devoted49 my leisure hours to the study of Motherhood as the hope of a nobler humanity. But for the great personal sorrow that came to me in the death of my wife and baby I should never have realized the truths I now see so clearly.
“And then the other woman suddenly came into my life. I never expected to love again—not because I thought it impossible, but because I thought it improbable in my little world here that I could ever again meet a woman I would ask to be my wife. But she dropped one day out of the sky.”
He paused and took a deep breath.
“I recognized her instantly as my mate, gentle and pure and capable of infinite joy or infinite pain. She did not realize the secret of my interest in her. I didn't expect it. I knew that under the conditions she could not. But I waited.”
He paused and searched for Mary's eyes.
“And you married her?” she asked in even tones.
“I have never allowed her to know that I love her.”
“Why?”
“She was married.”
Mary threw him a startled look and he went on evenly:
“I could have used my power over mind and body to separate her from her husband. I confess that I was tempted50. But there was a child. Their union had been sealed with the strongest tie that can bind41 two human beings. I have never allowed her to realize that she might love me. Had I chosen to break the silence between us I could have revealed this to her, taken her and torn her from the man to whom she had borne a babe. I had no right to commit that crime, no matter how deep the love that cried for its own. Marriage is based on the period of infancy of the child which spans the maternal51 life of woman. God had joined these two people together and no man had the right to put them asunder52!”
“And you gave her up?”
“I had to, little mother. On the recognition of this eternal law the whole structure of our civilization rests.”
Mary bent her gaze steadily on his face for a moment in silence.
“And you are telling me that I should be reconciled to the man who choked me into insensibility?”
“I am telling you that he is the father of your son—that he has rights which you cannot deny; that when you gave yourself to him in the first impulse of love a deed was done which Almighty53 God can never undo54. Your tragic blunder was the rush into marriage with a man about whose character you knew so little. It's the timid, shrinking, home-loving girl that makes this mistake. You must face it now. You are responsible as deeply and truly as the man who married you. That he happened at that moment to be a brute55 and a criminal is no more his fault than yours. It was YOUR business to KNOW before you made him the father of your child.”
“I tried to appeal to his better nature that awful night,” Mary interrupted, “but he only laughed at me!”
“You owe him another trial, little mother—you owe it to his boy, too.”
Mary shook her head bitterly.
“I can't—I just can't!”
“You won't see him once?”
She sprang to her feet trembling.
“No—no!”
“I don't think it's fair.”
“I'm afraid of him! You can't understand his power over my will.”
“Come, come, this is sheer cowardice—give the devil his dues. Face him and fight it out. Tell him you're done forever with him and his life, if you will—but don't hedge and trim and run away like this. I'm ashamed of you.”
“I won't see him—I've made up my mind.”
The Doctor threw up both hands.
“All right. If you won't, you won't. We'll let it go at that.”
He paused and changed his tones to friendly personal interest.
“And you're determined to leave me and take my kid away tomorrow?”
“We must go. I've no money to pay my board. I can't impose on you——”
“It's going to be awfully56 lonely.”
He looked at her with a strange, deep gaze, lifted his stooping shoulders with sudden resolution and changed his manner to light banter57.
“I suppose I couldn't persuade you to give me that boy?”
She smiled tenderly.
“You know his father did leave his mark on him after all! The eyes are all his. Of course, I will admit that those drooping lids have often been the mark of genius—perhaps a genius for evil in this case. If you don't want to take the risk—now's your chance. I will——”
Mary shook her head in reproachful protest.
“Don't tease me, dear doctor man. I've just this one day more with you. I'm counting each precious hour.”
“Forgive me!” he cried gayly. “I won't tease you any more. Come, we'll run over now and see our neighbor's new bungalow before you go. You admire this one and threaten to duplicate it. He has built a better one.”
“I don't believe it.”
“You'll go?”
“If you wish it——”
“Good. We'll take the boy, too. He can drive his new wagon the whole way. It's only half a mile.”
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收听单词发音
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1
steadily
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| adv.稳定地；不变地；持续地 | |
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2
basking
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| v.晒太阳，取暖( bask的现在分词 )；对…感到乐趣；因他人的功绩而出名；仰仗…的余泽 | |
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3
interpretation
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| n.解释，说明，描述；艺术处理 | |
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4
slumbering
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| 微睡，睡眠（slumber的现在分词形式） | |
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5
kindle
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| v.点燃，着火 | |
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bungalow
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| n.平房，周围有阳台的木造小平房 | |
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7
wrought
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| v.引起；以…原料制作；运转；adj.制造的 | |
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8
toiled
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| 长时间或辛苦地工作( toil的过去式和过去分词 )； 艰难缓慢地移动，跋涉 | |
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9
savings
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| n.存款，储蓄 | |
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10
determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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11
pretext
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| n.借口，托词 | |
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12
softened
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| （使）变软( soften的过去式和过去分词 )； 缓解打击； 缓和； 安慰 | |
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13
jaw
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| n.颚，颌，说教，流言蜚语；v.喋喋不休，教训 | |
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14
chattering
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| n. （机器振动发出的）咔嗒声，(鸟等)鸣，啁啾 adj. 喋喋不休的，啾啾声的 动词chatter的现在分词形式 | |
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15
quail
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| n.鹌鹑；vi.畏惧，颤抖 | |
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16
wagon
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| n.四轮马车，手推车，面包车；无盖运货列车 | |
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17
hitched
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| （免费）搭乘他人之车( hitch的过去式和过去分词 )； 搭便车； 攀上； 跃上 | |
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18
chubby
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| adj.丰满的，圆胖的 | |
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19
lapsed
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| adj.流失的，堕落的v.退步( lapse的过去式和过去分词 )；陷入；倒退；丧失 | |
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20
drawn
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| v.拖，拉，拔出；adj.憔悴的，紧张的 | |
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21
drooping
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| adj. 下垂的，无力的 动词droop的现在分词 | |
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22
bent
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| n.爱好，癖好；adj.弯的；决心的，一心的 | |
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23
pebble
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| n.卵石，小圆石 | |
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24
flicked
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| （尤指用手指或手快速地）轻击( flick的过去式和过去分词 )； （用…）轻挥； （快速地）按开关； 向…笑了一下（或瞥了一眼等） | |
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25
prosaic
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| adj.单调的，无趣的 | |
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26
physiologist
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| n.生理学家 | |
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27
jolt
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| v.（使）摇动，（使）震动，（使）颠簸 | |
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28
utterly
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| adv.完全地，绝对地 | |
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29
lobe
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| n.耳垂，（肺，肝等的）叶 | |
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30
maturity
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| n.成熟；完成；(支票、债券等)到期 | |
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31
disturbance
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| n.动乱，骚动；打扰，干扰；(身心)失调 | |
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32
obsession
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| n.困扰，无法摆脱的思想(或情感) | |
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33
purely
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| adv.纯粹地，完全地 | |
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insanity
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| n.疯狂，精神错乱；极端的愚蠢，荒唐 | |
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35
justify
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| vt.证明…正当(或有理)，为…辩护 | |
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36
ordinance
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| n.法令；条令；条例 | |
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alignment
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| n.队列；结盟，联合 | |
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38
infancy
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| n.婴儿期；幼年期；初期 | |
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39
immortal
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| adj.不朽的；永生的，不死的；神的 | |
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40
binds
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| v.约束( bind的第三人称单数 )；装订；捆绑；（用长布条）缠绕 | |
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41
bind
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| vt.捆，包扎；装订；约束；使凝固；vi.变硬 | |
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42
tragic
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| adj.悲剧的，悲剧性的，悲惨的 | |
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43
delusion
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| n.谬见，欺骗，幻觉，迷惑 | |
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44
knight
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| n.骑士，武士；爵士 | |
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45
jealousy
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| n.妒忌，嫉妒，猜忌 | |
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46
wrecks
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| n.沉船( wreck的名词复数 )；（事故中）遭严重毁坏的汽车（或飞机等）；（身体或精神上）受到严重损伤的人；状况非常糟糕的车辆（或建筑物等）v.毁坏[毁灭]某物( wreck的第三人称单数 )；使（船舶）失事，使遇难，使下沉 | |
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47
inexplicable
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| adj.无法解释的，难理解的 | |
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48
strife
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| n.争吵，冲突，倾轧，竞争 | |
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49
devoted
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| adj.忠诚的，忠实的，热心的，献身于...的 | |
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50
tempted
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| v.怂恿（某人）干不正当的事；冒…的险（tempt的过去分词） | |
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51
maternal
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| adj.母亲的，母亲般的，母系的，母方的 | |
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52
asunder
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| adj.分离的，化为碎片 | |
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53
almighty
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| adj.全能的，万能的；很大的，很强的 | |
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54
undo
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| vt.解开，松开；取消，撤销 | |
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55
brute
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| n.野兽，兽性 | |
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56
awfully
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| adv.可怕地，非常地，极端地 | |
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57
banter
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| n.嘲弄，戏谑；v.取笑，逗弄，开玩笑 | |
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