IX THE KISS

 That night Elsie sat in the parlour (as she still to herself called the dining-room) by the gas-fire which she had lighted on her own responsibility. An act and a situation which a few days earlier, two days earlier, would have been inconceivable to her! But Joe's clothes had refused to dry in the kitchen; the gas-ring there was incapable¹ of drawing the water out of them in the damp weather. Now they were dry; some of them were folded on a chair; upon these were laid the braces² which she had given to him on his birthday, and which evidently he had worn ever since. To Elsie now these soiled and frayed³ braces had a magic vital quality. They seemed, far more than the clothes, to have derived⁴ from him some of his individuality, to be a detached part of him; she was sewing a button on the lifeless old trousers, and she had taken the button, and the thimble, needle, and thread from Mrs. Earlforward's cardboard sewing-box in the left-hand drawer of the sideboard. She was working with the tools of a dead lady. At moments this irked and frightened her; at other moments she thought that what must be must be, and that, anyhow, the clothes ought to be put in order; and she could not go upstairs and disturb Joe by searching for her own apparatus—which certainly did not comprise trouser buttons. She tried to be natural and not to look ahead. She would not, for instance, dwell upon the apparently⁶ insoluble problem of arranging a proper funeral for Mrs. Earlforward. How could she, the servant, do anything towards that? She dared not leave her patients. She knew nothing about the organization of funerals. She had never even been to a funeral. She[Pg 291] had no knowledge of possible relatives of the Earlforwards.

 

"To-morrow! To-morrow! Not till to-morrow—all that!" she said doggedly⁷.

 

But she failed to push away everything. In the midst of her great grief for the death of Mrs. Earlforward (a perfect woman and a martyr) the selfish thought of her own future haunted her and would not be dismissed. Would Joe ever again wear those clothes which she was mending? He had taken some Bovril (Mr. Earlforward also), but she could not persuade herself that he was really better. She was terror-struck by the varied⁸ possibilities attending his death. A dead man secretly in her bed! What a plight⁹ for her! She determined¹⁰ afresh to confide¹¹ the secret of Joe to Mrs. Belrose to-morrow morning. Not that the mere¹² inconveniences of death deeply troubled her. No! In truth they were naught¹³. Or rather, if he died they would have absolutely no importance to her compared with the death itself. Having found Joe, was she to lose him again? She could not face such a prospect¹⁴....

 

And then Mr. Earlforward. She was beginning to be convinced that the master really was better. He had taken the Bovril. He had opened one or two of his letters. The shock of the news about Mrs. Earlforward, instead of shattering him to pieces, had strengthened him, morally if not physically¹⁵. He might recover—he was an amazing man! And, of course, she desired him to recover. Could she wish anyone's death? She could not be so cruel, so wicked! And yet, and yet, if he lived, she was his slave for ever; she was a captive with no hope of escape. A slave, either bowed down by sorrow for the death of Joe, or fatally desolated¹⁶ by the eternal reflection that Joe was alive and she could not have him because of her promise to Mr. Earlforward! She saw no hope; she made no reserves in the interpretation¹⁷ of her vow¹⁸ to the master. She could not see that circumstances inevitably¹⁹, if slowly, alter cases.

 

She yawned heavily in extreme exhaustion²⁰.[Pg 292]

 

Then her ear caught a faint, cautious tapping below. All trembling she crept downstairs. Jerry was at the shop-door. In the turmoil²¹ of distress²² she had forgotten that she had commanded him to call for orders. She was glad to have someone to talk to for a little while, and she brought him into the office. She saw in front of her, on the opposite side of the desk, a young lad who had most surprisingly and touchingly²³ put on his best clothes for important events. Also he had washed himself. Also he was smoking a cigarette.

 

Jerry, who was thin and pinched in the face, saw in front of him an ample and splendid young woman—not very young to him, for his notion of youthfulness was rather narrow, but much younger than his mother, though much older than Nell, his fancy of the Square, whose years did correspond with his notion of youthfulness. Elsie was slightly taller than himself. He thought she had the nicest, kindest face he had ever seen. He loved her brow when she frowned in doubt or anxiety; for him even her aprons²⁴ were different from any other woman's aprons. He was precocious²⁵, in love as in other matters, but he did not love Elsie, did not aspire²⁶ to love her. She was above him, out of his reach; he went in awe⁵ of her; he liked to feel that she was his tyrant²⁷. She was the most romantic, mysterious, and beautiful of all women and girls. Elsie very well understood his attitude towards her.

 

"I thought I might want yer to run down to the hospital for me, Jerry my boy," she said. "But I shan't now. Mrs. Earlforward died this afternoon."

 

"It's all over the Square," said Jerry, spitting negligently²⁸ into the dark fireplace, and pushing his cap further back on his head.

 

Elsie saw that he did not understand death.

 

"Yes," said she, "I suppose it is." She said no more, because of the uselessness of talking about death to a simple-minded youth like Jerry.

 

"It was very nice of you to bring me my umbrella like that," she said.[Pg 293]

 

"Oh!" said he, falsely scornful of himself. "It was easiest for me to bring it along like that."

 

He had been standing²⁹ with his legs apart; at this point he sat down familiarly and put his elbows on the desk and his jaw³⁰ in his hands; the cigarette hung loosely in his very mobile lips. They were silent; Jerry was proud and happy, and had nothing in particular to say about it. Elsie had too much to say to be able to talk.

 

"Then ye haven't got anything for me to do?" he asked.

 

"No, I haven't."

 

"Oo!" He was disappointed.

 

"But I might have to-morrow. You'll be off at two o'clock to-morrow, won't yer?"

 

"That's me."

 

"Very well then." She rose.

 

Jerry was extraordinarily³¹ uplifted by this brief sojourn³² alone with Elsie in the private office of T. T. Riceyman's. He felt that he was more of a grown man than ten thousand cigarettes and oaths and backchat with fragile virgins³³ in the Square could make him. He sprang from the chair.

 

"Give me a kiss, Elsie," he blurted³⁴ out audaciously. He was frightened by his own cheek.

 

"Jerry Perkins!" Elsie admonished³⁵ him. "Aren't ye ashamed of yerself? Mrs. Earlforward dead! And them two so ill upstairs!"

 

"What two?" Jerry asked, rather to cover his confusion than from curiosity.

 

"I mean Mr. Earlforward," said Elsie. She was not abashed³⁶ at her slip. With Jerry she had a grandiose³⁷ r?le to play, and no contretemps could spoil her performance.

 

Jerry guessed instantly that she had got Joe hidden in the house, but he never breathed a word of it. He even tried to look stupid and uncomprehending, which was difficult for him.

 

"Aren't ye ashamed of yerself?" she solemnly repeated.[Pg 294]

 

He moved towards the door. Elsie's glance followed him. She was sorry for him. She wanted to be good to somebody. She could not help Mr. Earlforward. She could do very little for Joe. Mrs. Earlforward was dead, and she could so easily give Jerry delight.

 

"Here!" she said.

 

He turned. She kissed him quietly but fully³⁸. There were no reservations in her kiss. Jerry, being too startled by unexpected joy, could not give the kiss back. He lost his nerve and went off so absorbed in his sensations that he forgot even to thank the sweet benefactress. In the Square his behaviour to the attendant Nell was witheringly curt³⁹. Nell did not know that she now had to cope with a genuine adult.

1 incapable   

adj.无能力的，不能做某事的

参考例句：

• He would be incapable of committing such a cruel deed.他不会做出这么残忍的事。
• Computers are incapable of creative thought.计算机不会创造性地思维。

2 braces   

n.吊带，背带；托架( brace的名词复数 )；箍子；括弧；（儿童）牙箍v.支住( brace的第三人称单数 )；撑牢；使自己站稳；振作起来

参考例句：

• The table is shaky because the braces are loose. 这张桌子摇摇晃晃，因为支架全松了。
• You don't need braces if you're wearing a belt! 要系腰带，就用不着吊带了。

3 frayed   

adj.磨损的v.（使布、绳等）磨损，磨破( fray的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• His shirt was frayed. 他的衬衫穿破了。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• The argument frayed their nerves. 争辩使他们不快。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》

4 derived   

vi.起源；由来；衍生；导出v.得到( derive的过去式和过去分词 )；（从…中）得到获得；源于；（从…中）提取

参考例句：

• Many English words are derived from Latin and Greek. 英语很多词源出于拉丁文和希腊文。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• He derived his enthusiasm for literature from his father. 他对文学的爱好是受他父亲的影响。 来自《简明英汉词典》

5 awe   

n.敬畏，惊惧；vt.使敬畏，使惊惧

参考例句：

• The sight filled us with awe.这景色使我们大为惊叹。
• The approaching tornado struck awe in our hearts.正在逼近的龙卷风使我们惊恐万分。

6 apparently   

adv.显然地；表面上，似乎

参考例句：

• An apparently blind alley leads suddenly into an open space.山穷水尽，豁然开朗。
• He was apparently much surprised at the news.他对那个消息显然感到十分惊异。

7 doggedly   

adv.顽强地，固执地

参考例句：

• He was still doggedly pursuing his studies.他仍然顽强地进行着自己的研究。
• He trudged doggedly on until he reached the flat.他顽强地、步履艰难地走着，一直走回了公寓。

8 varied   

adj.多样的，多变化的

参考例句：

• The forms of art are many and varied.艺术的形式是多种多样的。
• The hotel has a varied programme of nightly entertainment.宾馆有各种晚间娱乐活动。

9 plight   

n.困境，境况，誓约，艰难；vt.宣誓，保证，约定

参考例句：

• The leader was much concerned over the plight of the refugees.那位领袖对难民的困境很担忧。
• She was in a most helpless plight.她真不知如何是好。

10 determined   

adj.坚定的；有决心的

参考例句：

• I have determined on going to Tibet after graduation.我已决定毕业后去西藏。
• He determined to view the rooms behind the office.他决定查看一下办公室后面的房间。

11 confide   

v.向某人吐露秘密

参考例句：

• I would never readily confide in anybody.我从不轻易向人吐露秘密。
• He is going to confide the secrets of his heart to us.他将向我们吐露他心里的秘密。

12 mere   

adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过

参考例句：

• That is a mere repetition of what you said before.那不过是重复了你以前讲的话。
• It's a mere waste of time waiting any longer.再等下去纯粹是浪费时间。

13 naught   

n.无，零 [=nought]

参考例句：

• He sets at naught every convention of society.他轻视所有的社会习俗。
• I hope that all your efforts won't go for naught.我希望你的努力不会毫无结果。

14 prospect   

n.前景，前途；景色，视野

参考例句：

• This state of things holds out a cheerful prospect.事态呈现出可喜的前景。
• The prospect became more evident.前景变得更加明朗了。

15 physically   

adj.物质上，体格上，身体上，按自然规律

参考例句：

• He was out of sorts physically,as well as disordered mentally.他浑身不舒服，心绪也很乱。
• Every time I think about it I feel physically sick.一想起那件事我就感到极恶心。

16 desolated   

adj.荒凉的，荒废的

参考例句：

• Her death desolated him. 她的死使他很痛苦。
• War has desolated that city. 战争毁坏了那个城市。

17 interpretation   

n.解释，说明，描述；艺术处理

参考例句：

• His statement admits of one interpretation only.他的话只有一种解释。
• Analysis and interpretation is a very personal thing.分析与说明是个很主观的事情。

18 vow   

n.誓(言)，誓约；v.起誓，立誓

参考例句：

• My parents are under a vow to go to church every Sunday.我父母许愿，每星期日都去做礼拜。
• I am under a vow to drink no wine.我已立誓戒酒。

19 inevitably   

adv.不可避免地；必然发生地

参考例句：

• In the way you go on,you are inevitably coming apart.照你们这样下去，毫无疑问是会散伙的。
• Technological changes will inevitably lead to unemployment.技术变革必然会导致失业。

20 exhaustion   

n.耗尽枯竭，疲惫，筋疲力尽，竭尽，详尽无遗的论述

参考例句：

• She slept the sleep of exhaustion.她因疲劳而酣睡。
• His exhaustion was obvious when he fell asleep standing.他站着睡着了，显然是太累了。

21 turmoil   

n.骚乱，混乱，动乱

参考例句：

• His mind was in such a turmoil that he couldn't get to sleep.内心的纷扰使他无法入睡。
• The robbery put the village in a turmoil.抢劫使全村陷入混乱。

22 distress   

n.苦恼，痛苦，不舒适；不幸；vt.使悲痛

参考例句：

• Nothing could alleviate his distress.什么都不能减轻他的痛苦。
• Please don't distress yourself.请你不要忧愁了。

23 touchingly   

adv.令人同情地，感人地，动人地

参考例句：

• Aunt Polly knelt down and prayed for Tom so touchingly. 波莉姨妈跪下来，为汤姆祈祷，很令人感动。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Rather touchingly, he suggested the names of some professors who had known him at Duke University. 他还相当令人感动地提出了公爵大学里对他有了解的几个教授的名字。 来自辞典例句

24 aprons   

围裙( apron的名词复数 )； 停机坪，台口（舞台幕前的部份）

参考例句：

• Many people like to wear aprons while they are cooking. 许多人做饭时喜欢系一条围裙。
• The chambermaid in our corridor wears blue checked gingham aprons. 给我们扫走廊的清洁女工围蓝格围裙。

25 precocious   

adj.早熟的；较早显出的

参考例句：

• They become precocious experts in tragedy.他们成了一批思想早熟、善写悲剧的能手。
• Margaret was always a precocious child.玛格丽特一直是个早熟的孩子。

26 aspire   

vi.(to，after)渴望，追求，有志于

参考例句：

• Living together with you is what I aspire toward in my life.和你一起生活是我一生最大的愿望。
• I aspire to be an innovator not a follower.我迫切希望能变成个开创者而不是跟随者。

27 tyrant   

n.暴君，专制的君主，残暴的人

参考例句：

• The country was ruled by a despotic tyrant.该国处在一个专制暴君的统治之下。
• The tyrant was deaf to the entreaties of the slaves.暴君听不到奴隶们的哀鸣。

28 negligently   

参考例句：

• Losses caused intentionally or negligently by the lessee shall be borne by the lessee. 如因承租人的故意或过失造成损失的，由承租人负担。 来自经济法规部分
• Did the other person act negligently? 他人的行为是否有过失？ 来自口语例句

29 standing   

n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的

参考例句：

• After the earthquake only a few houses were left standing.地震过后只有几幢房屋还立着。
• They're standing out against any change in the law.他们坚决反对对法律做任何修改。

30 jaw   

n.颚，颌，说教，流言蜚语；v.喋喋不休，教训

参考例句：

• He delivered a right hook to his opponent's jaw.他给了对方下巴一记右钩拳。
• A strong square jaw is a sign of firm character.强健的方下巴是刚毅性格的标志。

31 extraordinarily   

adv.格外地；极端地

参考例句：

• She is an extraordinarily beautiful girl.她是个美丽非凡的姑娘。
• The sea was extraordinarily calm that morning.那天清晨，大海出奇地宁静。

32 sojourn   

v./n.旅居，寄居；逗留

参考例句：

• It would be cruel to begrudge your sojourn among flowers and fields.如果嫉妒你逗留在鲜花与田野之间，那将是太不近人情的。
• I am already feeling better for my sojourn here.我在此逗留期间，觉得体力日渐恢复。

33 virgins   

处女，童男( virgin的名词复数 )； 童贞玛利亚（耶稣之母）

参考例句：

• They were both virgins when they met and married. 他们从相识到结婚前都未曾经历男女之事。
• Men want virgins as concubines. 人家买姨太太的要整货。 来自汉英文学 - 骆驼祥子

34 blurted   

v.突然说出，脱口而出( blurt的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• She blurted it out before I could stop her. 我还没来得及制止，她已脱口而出。
• He blurted out the truth, that he committed the crime. 他不慎说出了真相，说是他犯了那个罪。 来自《简明英汉词典》

35 admonished   

v.劝告( admonish的过去式和过去分词 )；训诫；（温和地）责备；轻责

参考例句：

• She was admonished for chewing gum in class. 她在课堂上嚼口香糖，受到了告诫。
• The teacher admonished the child for coming late to school. 那个孩子迟到，老师批评了他。 来自《简明英汉词典》

36 abashed   

adj.窘迫的，尴尬的v.使羞愧，使局促，使窘迫( abash的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• He glanced at Juliet accusingly and she looked suitably abashed. 他怪罪的一瞥，朱丽叶自然显得很窘。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• The girl was abashed by the laughter of her classmates. 那小姑娘因同学的哄笑而局促不安。 来自《简明英汉词典》

37 grandiose   

adj.宏伟的，宏大的，堂皇的，铺张的

参考例句：

• His grandiose manner impressed those who met him for the first time.他那种夸大的举止给第一次遇见他的人留下了深刻的印象。
• As the fog vanished,a grandiose landscape unfolded before the tourists.雾气散去之后，一幅壮丽的景观展现在游客面前。

38 fully   

adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地

参考例句：

• The doctor asked me to breathe in,then to breathe out fully.医生让我先吸气，然后全部呼出。
• They soon became fully integrated into the local community.他们很快就完全融入了当地人的圈子。

39 curt   

adj.简短的，草率的

参考例句：

• He gave me an extremely curt answer.他对我作了极为草率的答复。
• He rapped out a series of curt commands.他大声发出了一连串简短的命令。