Chapter XXIV An Explanation

 "La discretion¹ défend de questionner, la délicatesse défend même de deviner."

 

We were a quiet party that evening, Madame having decided² to ask no one to meet us. It was like a piece of the old Paris life, for all had met for better or worse in that city, and spoke³ the language of the once brilliant capital.

 

Madame insisted that I should take the head of the table, she herself occupying a chair at the foot, which had remained vacant as long as I could remember. So I sat for the first time in the seat of my ancestors, whence my father had issued his choleric⁴ mandates⁵, only, I fear, to be answered as hotly.

 

"You are quiet, Monsieur," said Lucille, who sat at my right hand, and I thought her glance searched my face in a way that was new.

 

"Say he is dull," put in Alphonse, whose gaiety was at high-water mark. "Ce cher Dick—he is naturally so."

 

And he laughed at me with his old look of affection.[268]

 

"Mademoiselle means that I am duller than usual," I suggested.

 

"No," said Lucille, "I meant what I said."

 

"As always?" inquired Alphonse, in a low voice aside.

 

"As always," she answered, gravely. And I think she only spoke the truth.

 

We did not sit long over our wine, and John Turner reserved his cigar until a later opportunity.

 

"I'll play you a game of billiards," he said, looking at me.

 

In the drawing-room we found Lucille already; at the piano.

 

"I have some new songs," she said, "from the Basque country. I wonder if you will prefer them to the old."

 

I was crossing the room towards Madame, and a silence made me pause and look towards the piano. Lucille was addressing me—and no doubt I was clumsy enough to betray my surprise.

 

"I think I shall prefer the old ones, Mademoiselle," I answered.

 

She was fingering the pages carelessly, and Alphonse, who was always quick at such matters, stepped forward.

 

"As the songs are new the pages will require turning."

 

"Thank you," answered Lucille, rather coldly[269] as I thought, and Madame looked at me with a queer expression of impatience⁶, as if I had done something amiss. She took up her book and presently closed her eyes. John Turner did the same, and I, remembering that he was a heavy breather, went up to him.

 

"I am ready to beat you at billiards," I said.

 

Lucille and Alphonse were so much engaged at the piano as to be apparently⁷ oblivious⁸ to our departure. I suppose that they were grateful to us in their hearts for going.

 

My friend did not play long or skilfully⁹, and I, like all ne'er-do-wells, played a fair game in those days.

 

"Yes," he said, when handsomely beaten, "you evidently play on Sundays. Let us sit down and smoke."

 

I could not help noticing that the music had ceased. Lucille and Alphonse were probably talking together in low voices at the piano while Madame kindly¹⁰ slept.

 

"Don't scowl¹¹ at me like that," said John Turner, "but take one of these cigars."

 

We sat down, and smoked for some time in silence.

 

"It is one thing," said my companion at length, "to give a man a fair chance, and another to throw away your own."[270]

 

"What do you mean?"

 

"Why marry Mademoiselle to a weak-kneed fellow like Giraud?"

 

"He is not a weak-kneed fellow," I interrupted, "and can sit a horse as well as any man in the county."

 

"Life does not consist of sitting on horses."

 

"And he has proved himself a brave soldier."

 

"A man may be a brave soldier and make a poor fight of his life," persisted Turner. "Besides, it is against her will."

 

"Against her will?"

 

"Yes," said John Turner. "She wants to marry quite a different man."

 

"That may be," answered I, "but it is none of my business. I have no influence with Mademoiselle, who is one of my enemies. I have many."

 

"No—you haven't," said Turner, stoutly¹². "You have but one, and she is a clever one. Isabella Gayerson is a dangerous foe¹³, my boy. She has poisoned the minds of Lucille and Alphonse against you. She has tried to do the same by the Vicomtesse, and failed. She encouraged and harboured Devar in order to annoy you. You and I start for Paris to-morrow afternoon. Take my advice and ride over to Little Corton to-morrow morning. See Isabella, and have it out with her. Talk to her as you would to a man. Life would[271] be so much simpler if people would only recognise that sex is only a small part of it. Tell her you will see her d——d before you marry her, or words to that effect. It is all a matter of vanity or money. I'm going to bed. Good-night. My apologies to the ladies."

 

He took his candle, and left me with half a cigar to smoke.

 

I was up betimes the next morning, and set off on horseback through the quiet lanes soon after breakfast. Little Corton stands a mile inland, and two miles nearer to Lowestoft than the old Manor¹⁴ House of Hopton. Between the houses there is little pasture land, and I rode through fresh green corn with the dew still on it. The larks—and they are nowhere so numerous as on our sea-bound uplands—were singing a blithe¹⁵ chorus. The world was indeed happy that May morning.

 

The sight of the homely¹⁶ red walls of Little Corton nestling among the elms brought to my mind a hundred memories of the past days, wherein Isabella's parents had ever accorded a welcome to myself—a muddy-booted boy then, with but an evil reputation in the country-side.

 

Isabella had gone out, they told me, but as she had taken neither hat nor gloves, the servants opined that she could not be far away. I went in search, and found her in the beech¹⁷ wood. She had[272] taken her morning letters there, and read them as she walked, her dress stirring the dead leaves. She did not hear my footstep until I was close upon her.

 

"Ah! have you come to tell me that Lucille and Alphonse are engaged?" she asked, without even bidding me good morning. In her eyes, usually quiet and reserved, there was a look of great expectancy¹⁸.

 

"No."

 

She folded her letters slowly, and as we walked side by side her quiet eyes came slantwise to my face in a searching glance. She asked no other question, however, and left the burthen of the silence with me. There was a rustic¹⁹ seat near to us, and with one accord we went to it and sat down. Isabella seemed to be breathless, I know not why, and her bodice was stirred by the rapidity of her breathing. I noticed again that my old playmate was prettier than I had ever suspected—a strongly-built woman, upright and of a fine, graceful²⁰ figure.

 

"Don't beat about the bush," John Turner had advised, and I remembered his words now.

 

"Isabella," I said, awkwardly enough, as I stirred the dead leaves with my whip, "Isabella, do you know the terms of my father's will?"

 

She did not answer at once, and, glancing in her [273]direction, I saw that she had flushed like a schoolgirl.

 

"ISABELLA," I SAID, AWKWARDLY ENOUGH, AS I STIRRED THE

DEAD LEAVES WITH MY WHIP, "ISABELLA, DO YOU KNOW THE TERMS OF MY

FATHER'S WILL?" SHE DID NOT ANSWER AT ONCE, AND, GLANCING IN HER

DIRECTION, I SAW THAT SHE HAD FLUSHED LIKE A SCHOOLGIRL. "ISABELLA," I SAID, AWKWARDLY ENOUGH, AS I STIRRED THE DEAD LEAVES WITH MY WHIP, "ISABELLA, DO YOU KNOW THE TERMS OF MY FATHER'S WILL?" SHE DID NOT ANSWER AT ONCE, AND, GLANCING IN HER DIRECTION, I SAW THAT SHE HAD FLUSHED LIKE A SCHOOLGIRL.

"Yes," she answered at length.

 

"I am penniless unless you marry me."

 

"Yes—I know."

 

Her voice was quiet and composed. Isabella was younger than I, but in her presence I always felt myself her inferior and junior, as, no doubt, I had always been in mind though not in years.

 

"You have always been my enemy, Isabella."

 

"Why should I be that?" she asked.

 

"I suppose it is on account of the squire's will."

 

"I care nothing for that."

 

"Then, if you are not my enemy, if you do not hate me—I do not recollect²¹ doing you an injury—if you do not hate me, why have you poisoned Lucille's mind against me and made Alphonse distrust me? Why did you encourage Devar, whom you knew to be my enemy?"

 

"So you have ridden over in order to bring these charges against me," answered Isabella, in her coldest voice; "and you came at a time when you knew you would find me alone, so as to do it the more effectually."

 

"I am letting you know that I am aware that you dislike me, and want to be told why. Do you remember long ago at the gate over there leading to Drake's Spinney? It was the first time you had[274] put your hair up and had a long dress on. I was a clumsy oaf and did not know that those things made such a difference. I gave you a push as you were climbing over, and you fell."

 

"Yes," said Isabella; "I remember."

 

"You hurt yourself, and cried, and said you hated me then. And I believe you did, for you have never been the same since. That was fourteen years ago, Isabella—my first year at Cambridge. You were eighteen then."

 

"Yes," answered Isabella, in a chilly²² voice. "You have all your dates very correct, and a simple addition sum will tell you that I am thirty-two now—a middle-aged²³ woman, whose hair is turning grey! Thirty-two!"

 

And I was too stupid, or too wise, to tell her that she did not look it.

 

"I do not know," I said instead, "why you should have turned against me then, and remembered so long a mere²⁴ boyish jest; for I thought we were to be good friends always—as we had been—and never dreamt that a few hairpins²⁵ could make us different."

 

Isabella sat with her still, white hands clasped in her lap, and looked towards the gate that had caused this childish breach²⁶; but I could not see the expression on her face.

 

"My father," I went on, determined²⁷ to speak[275] out that which was in my mind, "had no business to make such a will, which could only lead to trouble. And I should have been a scoundrel had I sacrificed your happiness to my own cupidity—or, rather, had I attempted to do so. You might have thought it your duty to take me, Isabella, had I asked you to, for the sake of the money—though you have always spared me any doubts as to your opinion of me. You have always known my faults, and been less charitable towards them than anyone else. I should have been a scoundrel indeed had I asked you to sacrifice yourself."

 

She sat quite still, and was breathing quietly now.

 

"So I came to talk it over with you—as old friends, as if we were two men."

 

"Which we are not," put in Isabella, with her bitter laugh; and God knows what she meant.

 

"We were placed in an impossible position by being thus asked to marry against our will. I did not ever think of you in that way—think of loving you, I mean. And you have made it plain enough, of course, that you do not love me. On the contrary—"

 

"Of course," she echoed, in a queer, tired voice. "On the contrary."

 

I somehow came to a stop, and sat mutely seeking words. At last, however, I broke the silence.[276]

 

"Then," I said, making an effort to speak lightly and easily, "we understand each other now."—

 

"Yes," she answered; "we understand each other now."

 

I rose, for there seemed nothing more to be said, and yet feeling that I was no further on—that there was something yet misunderstood between us.

 

"And we are friends again, Isabella."

 

I held out my hand, and, after a momentary²⁸ pause, she placed her fingers in it. They were cold.—"Yes, I suppose so," she said, and her lips were quivering.

 

I left her slowly, and with a feeling of reluctance²⁹. My way lay over the gate, where fourteen years earlier I had made that mistake. As I climbed it, I looked back. Isabella had turned sideways on the seat, and her face was hidden in her arms folded on the back of it. She seemed to be weeping. I stood for a minute or two in indecision. Then, remembering how she disliked me, went slowly on to the stable, and found my horse.

1 discretion   

n.谨慎；随意处理

参考例句：

• You must show discretion in choosing your friend.你择友时必须慎重。
• Please use your best discretion to handle the matter.请慎重处理此事。

2 decided   

adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的

参考例句：

• This gave them a decided advantage over their opponents.这使他们比对手具有明显的优势。
• There is a decided difference between British and Chinese way of greeting.英国人和中国人打招呼的方式有很明显的区别。

3 spoke   

n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说

参考例句：

• They sourced the spoke nuts from our company.他们的轮辐螺帽是从我们公司获得的。
• The spokes of a wheel are the bars that connect the outer ring to the centre.辐条是轮子上连接外圈与中心的条棒。

4 choleric   

adj.易怒的，性情暴躁的

参考例句：

• His pride and choleric temper were to ruin him.他生性高傲自恃而又易于发怒，这会毁了他的。
• He was affable at one moment,choleric the next.他一会儿还和蔼可亲，可一转眼就火冒三丈。

5 mandates   

托管（mandate的第三人称单数形式）

参考例句：

• Individual mandates would require all people to purchase health insurance. 个人托管要求所有人都要购买健康保险。
• While I agree with those benefits, I'm not a supporter of mandates. 我同意上述好处，我不是授权软件的支持者。

6 impatience   

n.不耐烦，急躁

参考例句：

• He expressed impatience at the slow rate of progress.进展缓慢，他显得不耐烦。
• He gave a stamp of impatience.他不耐烦地跺脚。

7 apparently   

adv.显然地；表面上，似乎

参考例句：

• An apparently blind alley leads suddenly into an open space.山穷水尽，豁然开朗。
• He was apparently much surprised at the news.他对那个消息显然感到十分惊异。

8 oblivious   

adj.易忘的，遗忘的，忘却的，健忘的

参考例句：

• Mother has become quite oblivious after the illness.这次病后，妈妈变得特别健忘。
• He was quite oblivious of the danger.他完全没有察觉到危险。

9 skilfully   

adv. (美skillfully)熟练地

参考例句：

• Hall skilfully weaves the historical research into a gripping narrative. 霍尔巧妙地把历史研究揉进了扣人心弦的故事叙述。
• Enthusiasm alone won't do. You've got to work skilfully. 不能光靠傻劲儿，得找窍门。

10 kindly   

adj.和蔼的，温和的，爽快的；adv.温和地，亲切地

参考例句：

• Her neighbours spoke of her as kindly and hospitable.她的邻居都说她和蔼可亲、热情好客。
• A shadow passed over the kindly face of the old woman.一道阴影掠过老太太慈祥的面孔。

11 scowl   

vi.(at)生气地皱眉，沉下脸，怒视；n.怒容

参考例句：

• I wonder why he is wearing an angry scowl.我不知道他为何面带怒容。
• The boss manifested his disgust with a scowl.老板面带怒色，清楚表示出他的厌恶之感。

12 stoutly   

adv.牢固地，粗壮的

参考例句：

• He stoutly denied his guilt.他断然否认自己有罪。
• Burgess was taxed with this and stoutly denied it.伯杰斯为此受到了责难，但是他自己坚决否认有这回事。

13 foe   

n.敌人，仇敌

参考例句：

• He knew that Karl could be an implacable foe.他明白卡尔可能会成为他的死敌。
• A friend is a friend;a foe is a foe;one must be clearly distinguished from the other.敌是敌，友是友，必须分清界限。

14 manor   

n.庄园，领地

参考例句：

• The builder of the manor house is a direct ancestor of the present owner.建造这幢庄园的人就是它现在主人的一个直系祖先。
• I am not lord of the manor,but its lady.我并非此地的领主，而是这儿的女主人。

15 blithe   

adj.快乐的，无忧无虑的

参考例句：

• Tonight,however,she was even in a blithe mood than usual.但是，今天晚上她比往常还要高兴。
• He showed a blithe indifference to her feelings.他显得毫不顾及她的感情。

16 homely   

adj.家常的，简朴的；不漂亮的

参考例句：

• We had a homely meal of bread and cheese.我们吃了一顿面包加乳酪的家常便餐。
• Come and have a homely meal with us,will you?来和我们一起吃顿家常便饭，好吗？

17 beech   

n.山毛榉；adj.山毛榉的

参考例句：

• Autumn is the time to see the beech woods in all their glory.秋天是观赏山毛榉林的最佳时期。
• Exasperated,he leaped the stream,and strode towards beech clump.他满腔恼怒，跳过小河，大踏步向毛榉林子走去。

18 expectancy   

n.期望，预期，（根据概率统计求得）预期数额

参考例句：

• Japanese people have a very high life expectancy.日本人的平均寿命非常长。
• The atomosphere of tense expectancy sobered everyone.这种期望的紧张气氛使每个人变得严肃起来。

19 rustic   

adj.乡村的，有乡村特色的；n.乡下人，乡巴佬

参考例句：

• It was nearly seven months of leisurely rustic living before Michael felt real boredom.这种悠闲的乡村生活过了差不多七个月之后,迈克尔开始感到烦闷。
• We hoped the fresh air and rustic atmosphere would help him adjust.我们希望新鲜的空气和乡村的氛围能帮他调整自己。

20 graceful   

adj.优美的，优雅的；得体的

参考例句：

• His movements on the parallel bars were very graceful.他的双杠动作可帅了!
• The ballet dancer is so graceful.芭蕾舞演员的姿态是如此的优美。

21 recollect   

v.回忆，想起，记起，忆起，记得

参考例句：

• He tried to recollect things and drown himself in them.他极力回想过去的事情而沉浸于回忆之中。
• She could not recollect being there.她回想不起曾经到过那儿。

22 chilly   

adj.凉快的，寒冷的

参考例句：

• I feel chilly without a coat.我由于没有穿大衣而感到凉飕飕的。
• I grew chilly when the fire went out.炉火熄灭后，寒气逼人。

23 middle-aged   

adj.中年的

参考例句：

• I noticed two middle-aged passengers.我注意到两个中年乘客。
• The new skin balm was welcome by middle-aged women.这种新护肤香膏受到了中年妇女的欢迎。

24 mere   

adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过

参考例句：

• That is a mere repetition of what you said before.那不过是重复了你以前讲的话。
• It's a mere waste of time waiting any longer.再等下去纯粹是浪费时间。

25 hairpins   

n.发夹( hairpin的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• The price of these hairpins are about the same. 这些发夹的价格大致相同。 来自互联网
• So the king gives a hundred hairpins to each of them. 所以国王送给她们每人一百个漂亮的发夹。 来自互联网

26 breach   

n.违反，不履行；破裂；vt.冲破，攻破

参考例句：

• We won't have any breach of discipline.我们不允许任何破坏纪律的现象。
• He was sued for breach of contract.他因不履行合同而被起诉。

27 determined   

adj.坚定的；有决心的

参考例句：

• I have determined on going to Tibet after graduation.我已决定毕业后去西藏。
• He determined to view the rooms behind the office.他决定查看一下办公室后面的房间。

28 momentary   

adj.片刻的，瞬息的；短暂的

参考例句：

• We are in momentary expectation of the arrival of you.我们无时无刻不在盼望你的到来。
• I caught a momentary glimpse of them.我瞥了他们一眼。

29 reluctance   

n.厌恶，讨厌，勉强，不情愿

参考例句：

• The police released Andrew with reluctance.警方勉强把安德鲁放走了。
• He showed the greatest reluctance to make a reply.他表示很不愿意答复。