By a brisk, ruddy-cheeked man in a tasseled1 traveling-cap, carrying under his arm a ledger-like volume, the above words were addressed to the collegian before introduced, suddenly accosted2 by the rail to which not long after his retreat, as in a previous chapter recounted, he had returned, and there remained.
"Have you seen him, sir?"
Rallied from his apparent diffidence by the genial3 jauntiness4 of the stranger, the youth answered with unwonted promptitude: "Yes, a person with a weed was here not very long ago."
"Saddish?"
"Yes, and a little cracked, too, I should say."
"It was he. Misfortune, I fear, has disturbed his brain. Now quick, which way did he go?"
"Why just in the direction from which you came, the gangway yonder."
"Did he? Then the man in the gray coat, whom I [71] just met, said right: he must have gone ashore5. How unlucky!"
He stood vexedly twitching6 at his cap-tassel, which fell over by his whisker, and continued: "Well, I am very sorry. In fact, I had something for him here."—Then drawing nearer, "you see, he applied7 to me for relief, no, I do him injustice8, not that, but he began to intimate, you understand. Well, being very busy just then, I declined; quite rudely, too, in a cold, morose9, unfeeling way, I fear. At all events, not three minutes afterwards I felt self-reproach, with a kind of prompting, very peremptory10, to deliver over into that unfortunate man's hands a ten-dollar bill. You smile. Yes, it may be superstition11, but I can't help it; I have my weak side, thank God. Then again," he rapidly went on, "we have been so very prosperous lately in our affairs—by we, I mean the Black Rapids Coal Company—that, really, out of my abundance, associative and individual, it is but fair that a charitable investment or two should be made, don't you think so?"
"Sir," said the collegian without the least embarrassment12, "do I understand that you are officially connected with the Black Rapids Coal Company?"
"Yes, I happen to be president and transfer-agent."
"You are?"
"Yes, but what is it to you? You don't want to invest?"
"Why, do you sell the stock?"
"Some might be bought, perhaps; but why do you ask? you don't want to invest?" [72]
"But supposing I did," with cool self-collectedness, "could you do up the thing for me, and here?"
"Bless my soul," gazing at him in amaze, "really, you are quite a business man. Positively13, I feel afraid of you."
"Oh, no need of that.—You could sell me some of that stock, then?"
"I don't know, I don't know. To be sure, there are a few shares under peculiar14 circumstances bought in by the Company; but it would hardly be the thing to convert this boat into the Company's office. I think you had better defer15 investing. So," with an indifferent air, "you have seen the unfortunate man I spoke16 of?"
"Let the unfortunate man go his ways.—What is that large book you have with you?"
"My transfer-book. I am subpoenaed17 with it to court."
"Black Rapids Coal Company," obliquely18 reading the gilt19 inscription20 on the back; "I have heard much of it. Pray do you happen to have with you any statement of the condition of your company."
"A statement has lately been printed."
"Pardon me, but I am naturally inquisitive21. Have you a copy with you?"
"I tell you again, I do not think that it would be suitable to convert this boat into the Company's office.—That unfortunate man, did you relieve him at all?"
"Let the unfortunate man relieve himself.—Hand me the statement."
"Well, you are such a business-man, I can hardly deny you. Here," handing a small, printed pamphlet. [73]
"I hate a suspicious man," said the other, observing him; "but I must say I like to see a cautious one."
"I can gratify you there," languidly returning the pamphlet; "for, as I said before, I am naturally inquisitive; I am also circumspect23. No appearances can deceive me. Your statement," he added "tells a very fine story; but pray, was not your stock a little heavy awhile ago? downward tendency? Sort of low spirits among holders24 on the subject of that stock?"
"Yes, there was a depression. But how came it? who devised it? The 'bears,' sir. The depression of our stock was solely25 owing to the growling26, the hypocritical growling, of the bears."
"How, hypocritical?"
"Why, the most monstrous28 of all hypocrites are these bears: hypocrites by inversion29; hypocrites in the simulation of things dark instead of bright; souls that thrive, less upon depression, than the fiction of depression; professors of the wicked art of manufacturing depressions; spurious Jeremiahs; sham30 Heraclituses, who, the lugubrious31 day done, return, like sham Lazaruses among the beggars, to make merry over the gains got by their pretended sore heads—scoundrelly bears!"
"You are warm against these bears?"
"If I am, it is less from the remembrance of their stratagems32 as to our stock, than from the persuasion33 that these same destroyers of confidence, and gloomy philosophers of the stock-market, though false in themselves, are yet true types of most destroyers of confidence [74] and gloomy philosophers, the world over. Fellows who, whether in stocks, politics, bread-stuffs, morals, metaphysics, religion—be it what it may—trump up their black panics in the naturally-quiet brightness, solely with a view to some sort of covert34 advantage. That corpse35 of calamity36 which the gloomy philosopher parades, is but his Good-Enough-Morgan."
"I rather like that," knowingly drawled the youth. "I fancy these gloomy souls as little as the next one. Sitting on my sofa after a champagne37 dinner, smoking my plantation38 cigar, if a gloomy fellow come to me—what a bore!"
"You tell him it's all stuff, don't you?"
"I tell him it ain't natural. I say to him, you are happy enough, and you know it; and everybody else is as happy as you, and you know that, too; and we shall all be happy after we are no more, and you know that, too; but no, still you must have your sulk."
"And do you know whence this sort of fellow gets his sulk? not from life; for he's often too much of a recluse39, or else too young to have seen anything of it. No, he gets it from some of those old plays he sees on the stage, or some of those old books he finds up in garrets. Ten to one, he has lugged40 home from auction41 a musty old Seneca, and sets about stuffing himself with that stale old hay; and, thereupon, thinks it looks wise and antique to be a croaker, thinks it's taking a stand-way above his kind."
"Just so," assented42 the youth. "I've lived some, and [75] seen a good many such ravens43 at second hand. By the way, strange how that man with the weed, you were inquiring for, seemed to take me for some soft sentimentalist, only because I kept quiet, and thought, because I had a copy of Tacitus with me, that I was reading him for his gloom, instead of his gossip. But I let him talk. And, indeed, by my manner humored him."
"You shouldn't have done that, now. Unfortunate man, you must have made quite a fool of him."
"His own fault if I did. But I like prosperous fellows, comfortable fellows; fellows that talk comfortably and prosperously, like you. Such fellows are generally honest. And, I say now, I happen to have a superfluity in my pocket, and I'll just——"
"—Act the part of a brother to that unfortunate man?"
"Let the unfortunate man be his own brother. What are you dragging him in for all the time? One would think you didn't care to register any transfers, or dispose of any stock—mind running on something else. I say I will invest."
"Stay, stay, here come some uproarious fellows—this way, this way."
And with off-handed politeness the man with the book escorted his companion into a private little haven44 removed from the brawling45 swells46 without.
"Now tell me, sir," said he with the book, "how comes it that a young gentleman like you, a sedate49 student [76] at the first appearance, should dabble50 in stocks and that sort of thing?"
"There are certain sophomorean errors in the world," drawled the sophomore51, deliberately52 adjusting his shirt-collar, "not the least of which is the popular notion touching53 the nature of the modern scholar, and the nature of the modern scholastic54 sedateness55."
"So it seems, so it seems. Really, this is quite a new leaf in my experience."
"Experience, sir," originally observed the sophomore, "is the only teacher."
"Hence am I your pupil; for it's only when experience speaks, that I can endure to listen to speculation56."
"My speculations57, sir," dryly drawing himself up, "have been chiefly governed by the maxim58 of Lord Bacon; I speculate in those philosophies which come home to my business and bosom—pray, do you know of any other good stocks?"
"You wouldn't like to be concerned in the New Jerusalem, would you?"
"New Jerusalem?"
"Yes, the new and thriving city, so called, in northern Minnesota. It was originally founded by certain fugitive59 Mormons. Hence the name. It stands on the Mississippi. Here, here is the map," producing a roll. "There—there, you see are the public buildings—here the landing—there the park—yonder the botanic gardens—and this, this little dot here, is a perpetual fountain, you understand. You observe there are twenty [77] asterisks60. Those are for the lyceums. They have lignum-vitae rostrums."
"All standing—bona fide."
"These marginal squares here, are they the water-lots?"
"Water-lots in the city of New Jerusalem? All terra firma—you don't seem to care about investing, though?"
"Hardly think I should read my title clear, as the law students say," yawned the collegian.
"Prudent62—you are prudent. Don't know that you are wholly out, either. At any rate, I would rather have one of your shares of coal stock than two of this other. Still, considering that the first settlement was by two fugitives63, who had swum over naked from the opposite shore—it's a surprising place. It is, bona fide.—But dear me, I must go. Oh, if by possibility you should come across that unfortunate man——"
"—In that case," with drawling impatience64, "I will send for the steward65, and have him and his misfortunes consigned66 overboard."
"Ha ha!—now were some gloomy philosopher here, some theological bear, forever taking occasion to growl27 down the stock of human nature (with ulterior views, d'ye see, to a fat benefice in the gift of the worshipers of Ariamius), he would pronounce that the sign of a hardening heart and a softening67 brain. Yes, that would be his sinister68 construction. But it's nothing more than the oddity of a genial humor—genial but dry. Confess it. Good-bye."
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1
tasseled
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| v.抽穗， （玉米）长穗须( tassel的过去式和过去分词 )；使抽穗， （为了使作物茁壮生长）摘去穗状雄花；用流苏装饰 | |
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2
accosted
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| v.走过去跟…讲话( accost的过去式和过去分词 )；跟…搭讪；（乞丐等）上前向…乞讨；（妓女等）勾搭 | |
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3
genial
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| adj.亲切的，和蔼的，愉快的，脾气好的 | |
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4
jauntiness
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| n.心满意足；洋洋得意；高兴；活泼 | |
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ashore
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| adv.在(向)岸上，上岸 | |
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twitching
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| n.颤搐 | |
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7
applied
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| adj.应用的；v.应用，适用 | |
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8
injustice
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| n.非正义，不公正，不公平，侵犯（别人的）权利 | |
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morose
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| adj.脾气坏的，不高兴的 | |
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10
peremptory
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| adj.紧急的，专横的，断然的 | |
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11
superstition
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| n.迷信，迷信行为 | |
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12
embarrassment
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| n.尴尬；使人为难的人(事物)；障碍；窘迫 | |
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13
positively
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| adv.明确地，断然，坚决地；实在，确实 | |
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14
peculiar
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| adj.古怪的，异常的；特殊的，特有的 | |
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15
defer
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| vt.推迟，拖延；vi.(to)遵从，听从，服从 | |
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16
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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17
subpoenaed
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| v.（用传票）传唤（某人）( subpoena的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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18
obliquely
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| adv.斜； 倾斜； 间接； 不光明正大 | |
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gilt
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| adj.镀金的；n.金边证券 | |
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20
inscription
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| n.（尤指石块上的）刻印文字，铭文，碑文 | |
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21
inquisitive
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| adj.求知欲强的，好奇的，好寻根究底的 | |
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22
sagely
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| adv. 贤能地，贤明地 | |
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23
circumspect
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| adj.慎重的，谨慎的 | |
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24
holders
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| 支持物( holder的名词复数 )； 持有者； （支票等）持有人； 支托（或握持）…之物 | |
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25
solely
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| adv.仅仅，唯一地 | |
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26
growling
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| n.吠声, 咆哮声 v.怒吠, 咆哮, 吼 | |
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27
growl
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| v.（狗等）嗥叫，（炮等）轰鸣；n.嗥叫，轰鸣 | |
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28
monstrous
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| adj.巨大的；恐怖的；可耻的，丢脸的 | |
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29
inversion
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| n.反向，倒转，倒置 | |
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30
sham
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| n./adj.假冒(的)，虚伪(的) | |
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31
lugubrious
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| adj.悲哀的，忧郁的 | |
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32
stratagems
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| n.诡计，计谋( stratagem的名词复数 )；花招 | |
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33
persuasion
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| n.劝说；说服；持有某种信仰的宗派 | |
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34
covert
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| adj.隐藏的；暗地里的 | |
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35
corpse
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| n.尸体，死尸 | |
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36
calamity
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| n.灾害，祸患，不幸事件 | |
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37
champagne
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| n.香槟酒；微黄色 | |
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38
plantation
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| n.种植园，大农场 | |
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39
recluse
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| n.隐居者 | |
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40
lugged
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| vt.用力拖拉（lug的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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41
auction
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| n.拍卖；拍卖会；vt.拍卖 | |
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42
assented
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| 同意，赞成( assent的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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43
ravens
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| n.低质煤；渡鸦( raven的名词复数 ) | |
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44
haven
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| n.安全的地方，避难所，庇护所 | |
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45
brawling
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| n.争吵，喧嚷 | |
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46
swells
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| 增强( swell的第三人称单数 )； 肿胀； （使）凸出； 充满（激情） | |
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47
transacted
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| v.办理（业务等）( transact的过去式和过去分词 )；交易，谈判 | |
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48
forth
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| adv.向前；向外，往外 | |
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49
sedate
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| adj.沉着的，镇静的，安静的 | |
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50
dabble
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| v.涉足，浅赏 | |
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51
sophomore
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| n.大学二年级生；adj.第二年的 | |
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52
deliberately
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| adv.审慎地；蓄意地；故意地 | |
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53
touching
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| adj.动人的，使人感伤的 | |
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54
scholastic
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| adj.学校的，学院的，学术上的 | |
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55
sedateness
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| n.安详，镇静 | |
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56
speculation
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| n.思索，沉思；猜测；投机 | |
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57
speculations
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| n.投机买卖( speculation的名词复数 )；思考；投机活动；推断 | |
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58
maxim
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| n.格言，箴言 | |
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59
fugitive
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| adj.逃亡的，易逝的；n.逃犯，逃亡者 | |
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60
asterisks
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| n.星号，星状物( asterisk的名词复数 )v.加星号于( asterisk的第三人称单数 ) | |
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61
standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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62
prudent
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| adj.谨慎的，有远见的，精打细算的 | |
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63
fugitives
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| n.亡命者，逃命者( fugitive的名词复数 ) | |
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64
impatience
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| n.不耐烦，急躁 | |
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65
steward
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| n.乘务员，服务员；看管人；膳食管理员 | |
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66
consigned
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| v.把…置于（令人不快的境地）( consign的过去式和过去分词 )；把…托付给；把…托人代售；丟弃 | |
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67
softening
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| 变软，软化 | |
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68
sinister
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| adj.不吉利的，凶恶的，左边的 | |
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