Unfortunately for Popanilla, he did not enjoy one advantage which all founders10 of sects11 have duly appreciated, and by which they have been materially assisted. It is a great and an unanswerable argument in favour of a Providence12 that we constantly perceive that the most beneficial results are brought about by the least worthy13 and most insignificant14 agents. The purest religions would never have been established had they not been supported by sinners who felt the burthen of the old faith; and the most free and enlightened governments are often generated by the discontented, the disappointed, and the dissolute. Now, in the Isle16 of Fantaisie, unfortunately for our revolutionizer, there was not a single grumbler17.
Unable, therefore, to make the bad passions of his fellow creatures the unconscious instruments of his good purposes, Popanilla must have been contented15 to have monopolised all the wisdom of the moderns, had he not, with the unbaffled wit of an inventor, hit upon a new expedient18. Like Socrates, our philosopher began to cultivate with sedulousness19 the society of youth.
In a short time the ladies of Fantaisie were forced to observe that the fair sex most unfashionably predominated in their evening assemblages; for the young gentlemen of the island had suddenly ceased to pay their graceful20 homage21 at the altar of Terpsichore. In an Indian isle not to dance was as bad as heresy22. The ladies rallied the recreants23, but their playful sarcasms24 failed of their wonted effect. In the natural course of things they had recourse to remonstrances25, but their appeals were equally fruitless. The delicate creatures tried reproaches, but the boyish cynics received them with a scowl26 and answered them with a sneer27.
The women fled in indignation to their friendly monarch28; but the voluptuary of nature only shrugged29 his shoulders and smiled. He kissed away their tears, and their frowns vanished as he crowned their long hair with roses.
‘If the lads really show such bad taste,’ said his Majesty30, ‘why I and my lords must do double duty, and dance with a couple of you at once.’ Consoled and complimented, and crowned by a King, who could look sad? The women forgot their anger in their increasing loyalty31.
But the pupils of Popanilla had no sooner mastered the first principles of science than they began to throw off their retired32 habits and uncommunicative manners. Being not utterly33 ignorant of some of the rudiments34 of knowledge, and consequently having completed their education, it was now their duty, as members of society, to instruct and not to study. They therefore courted, instead of shunned35, their fellow-creatures; and on all occasions seized all opportunities of assisting the spread of knowledge. The voices of lecturing boys resounded36 in every part of the island. Their tones were so shrill37, their manners so presuming, their knowledge so crude, and their general demeanour so completely unamiable, that it was impossible to hear them without delight, advantage, and admiration38.
The women were not now the only sufferers and the only complainants. Dinned39 to death, the men looked gloomy; and even the King, for the first time in his life, looked grave. Could this Babel, he thought, be that empire of bliss40, that delightful41 Fantaisie, where to be ruler only proved that you were the most skilful42 in making others happy! His brow ached under his light flowery crown, as if it were bound by the barbarous circle of a tyrant43, heavy with gems44 and gold. In his despair he had some thoughts of leaving his kingdom and betaking himself to the mermaids45.
The determination of the most precious portion of his subjects saved his empire. As the disciples46 of the new school were daily demanding, ‘What is the use of dancing? what is the use of drinking wine? what is the use of smelling flowers?’ the women, like prescient politicians, began to entertain a nervous suspicion that in time these sages47 might even presume to question the utility of that homage which, in spite of the Grecian Philosophers and the British Essayists, we have been in the habit of conceding to them ever since Eden; and they rushed again to the King like frightened deer. Something now was to be done; and the monarch, with an expression of countenance48 which almost amounted to energy, whispered consolation49.
The King sent for Popanilla; the message produced a great sensation; the enlightened introducer of the new principles had not been at Court since he was cut. No doubt his Majesty was at last impregnated with the liberal spirit of the age; and Popanilla was assuredly to be Premier50. In fact, it must be so; he was ‘sent for;’ there was no precedent51 in Fantaisie, though there might be in other islands, for a person being ‘sent for’ and not being Premier. His disciples were in high spirits; the world was now to be regulated upon right principles, and they were to be installed into their right places.
‘Illustrious Popanilla!’ said the King, ‘you once did me the honour of making me a speech which, unfortunately for myself, I candidly52 confess, I was then incapable53 of understanding; no wonder, as it was the first I ever beard. I shall not, however, easily forget the effect which it produced upon me. I have since considered it my duty, as a monarch, to pay particular attention to your suggestions. I now understand them with sufficient clearness to be fully54 convinced of their excellence55, and in future I intend to act upon them, without any exception or deviation56. To prove my sincerity57, I have determined to commence the new system at once; and as I think that, without some extension of our international relations, the commercial interest of this island will be incapable of furnishing the taxes which I intend to levy58, I have determined, therefore, to fit out an expedition for the purpose of discovering new islands and forming relations with new islanders. It is but due to your merit that you should be appointed to the command of it; and further to testify my infinite esteem59 for your character, and my complete confidence in your abilities, I make you post-captain on the spot. As the axiom of your school seems to be that everything can be made perfect at once, without time, without experience, without practice, and without preparation, I have no doubt, with the aid of a treatise60 or two, You will make a consummate61 naval62 commander, although you have never been at sea in the whole course of your life. Farewell, Captain Popanilla!’
No sooner was this adieu uttered than four brawny63 lords of the bed-chamber seized the Turgot of Fantaisie by the shoulders, and carried him with inconceivable rapidity to the shore. His pupils, who would have fled to his rescue, were stifled64 with the embraces of their former partners, and their utilitarianism dissolved in the arms of those they once so rudely rejected. As for their tutor, he was thrust into one of the canoes, with some fresh water, bread-fruit, dried fish, and a basket of alligator-pears. A band of mermaids carried the canoe with exquisite65 management through the shallows and over the breakers, and poor Popanilla in a few minutes found himself out at sea. Tremendously frightened, he offered to recant all his opinions, and denounce as traitors66 any individuals whom the Court might select. But his former companions did not exactly detect the utility of his return. His offers, his supplications, were equally fruitless; and the only answer which floated to him on the wind was, ‘Farewell, Captain Popanilla!’
点击收听单词发音
1 discomfited | |
v.使为难( discomfit的过去式和过去分词);使狼狈;使挫折;挫败 | |
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2 banished | |
v.放逐,驱逐( banish的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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3 imprisoned | |
下狱,监禁( imprison的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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4 conclusive | |
adj.最后的,结论的;确凿的,消除怀疑的 | |
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5 consolatory | |
adj.慰问的,可藉慰的 | |
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6 prudent | |
adj.谨慎的,有远见的,精打细算的 | |
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7 determined | |
adj.坚定的;有决心的 | |
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8 doctrines | |
n.教条( doctrine的名词复数 );教义;学说;(政府政策的)正式声明 | |
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9 proselytizing | |
v.(使)改变宗教信仰[政治信仰、意见等],使变节( proselytize的现在分词 ) | |
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10 founders | |
n.创始人( founder的名词复数 ) | |
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11 sects | |
n.宗派,教派( sect的名词复数 ) | |
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12 providence | |
n.深谋远虑,天道,天意;远见;节约;上帝 | |
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13 worthy | |
adj.(of)值得的,配得上的;有价值的 | |
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14 insignificant | |
adj.无关紧要的,可忽略的,无意义的 | |
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15 contented | |
adj.满意的,安心的,知足的 | |
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16 isle | |
n.小岛,岛 | |
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17 grumbler | |
爱抱怨的人,发牢骚的人 | |
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18 expedient | |
adj.有用的,有利的;n.紧急的办法,权宜之计 | |
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19 sedulousness | |
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20 graceful | |
adj.优美的,优雅的;得体的 | |
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21 homage | |
n.尊敬,敬意,崇敬 | |
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22 heresy | |
n.异端邪说;异教 | |
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23 recreants | |
n.懦夫( recreant的名词复数 ) | |
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24 sarcasms | |
n.讥讽,讽刺,挖苦( sarcasm的名词复数 ) | |
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25 remonstrances | |
n.抱怨,抗议( remonstrance的名词复数 ) | |
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26 scowl | |
vi.(at)生气地皱眉,沉下脸,怒视;n.怒容 | |
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27 sneer | |
v.轻蔑;嘲笑;n.嘲笑,讥讽的言语 | |
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28 monarch | |
n.帝王,君主,最高统治者 | |
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29 shrugged | |
vt.耸肩(shrug的过去式与过去分词形式) | |
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30 majesty | |
n.雄伟,壮丽,庄严,威严;最高权威,王权 | |
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31 loyalty | |
n.忠诚,忠心 | |
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32 retired | |
adj.隐退的,退休的,退役的 | |
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33 utterly | |
adv.完全地,绝对地 | |
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34 rudiments | |
n.基础知识,入门 | |
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35 shunned | |
v.避开,回避,避免( shun的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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36 resounded | |
v.(指声音等)回荡于某处( resound的过去式和过去分词 );产生回响;(指某处)回荡着声音 | |
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37 shrill | |
adj.尖声的;刺耳的;v尖叫 | |
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38 admiration | |
n.钦佩,赞美,羡慕 | |
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39 dinned | |
vt.喧闹(din的过去式与过去分词形式) | |
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40 bliss | |
n.狂喜,福佑,天赐的福 | |
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41 delightful | |
adj.令人高兴的,使人快乐的 | |
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42 skilful | |
(=skillful)adj.灵巧的,熟练的 | |
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43 tyrant | |
n.暴君,专制的君主,残暴的人 | |
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44 gems | |
growth; economy; management; and customer satisfaction 增长 | |
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45 mermaids | |
n.(传说中的)美人鱼( mermaid的名词复数 ) | |
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46 disciples | |
n.信徒( disciple的名词复数 );门徒;耶稣的信徒;(尤指)耶稣十二门徒之一 | |
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47 sages | |
n.圣人( sage的名词复数 );智者;哲人;鼠尾草(可用作调料) | |
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48 countenance | |
n.脸色,面容;面部表情;vt.支持,赞同 | |
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49 consolation | |
n.安慰,慰问 | |
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50 premier | |
adj.首要的;n.总理,首相 | |
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51 precedent | |
n.先例,前例;惯例;adj.在前的,在先的 | |
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52 candidly | |
adv.坦率地,直率而诚恳地 | |
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53 incapable | |
adj.无能力的,不能做某事的 | |
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54 fully | |
adv.完全地,全部地,彻底地;充分地 | |
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55 excellence | |
n.优秀,杰出,(pl.)优点,美德 | |
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56 deviation | |
n.背离,偏离;偏差,偏向;离题 | |
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57 sincerity | |
n.真诚,诚意;真实 | |
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58 levy | |
n.征收税或其他款项,征收额 | |
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59 esteem | |
n.尊敬,尊重;vt.尊重,敬重;把…看作 | |
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60 treatise | |
n.专著;(专题)论文 | |
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61 consummate | |
adj.完美的;v.成婚;使完美 [反]baffle | |
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62 naval | |
adj.海军的,军舰的,船的 | |
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63 brawny | |
adj.强壮的 | |
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64 stifled | |
(使)窒息, (使)窒闷( stifle的过去式和过去分词 ); 镇压,遏制; 堵 | |
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65 exquisite | |
adj.精美的;敏锐的;剧烈的,感觉强烈的 | |
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66 traitors | |
卖国贼( traitor的名词复数 ); 叛徒; 背叛者; 背信弃义的人 | |
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