Day and night the whole island was employed in preparing for the great fleet and in huzzaing Popanilla. When at borne, every ten minutes he was obliged to appear in the balcony, and then, with hand on heart and hat in hand, ah! that bow! that perpetual motion of popularity! If a man love ease, let him be most unpopular. The Managers did the impossible to assist and advance the intercourse6 between the two nations. They behaved in a liberal and enlightened manner, and a deputation of liberal and enlightened merchants consequently waited upon them with a vote of thanks. They issued so many pink shells that the price of the public funds was doubled, and affairs arranged so skilfully7 that money was universally declared to be worth nothing, so that every one in the island, from the Premier9 down to the Mendicant10 whom the lecture-loving Skindeep threatened with the bastinado, was enabled to participate, in some degree, in the approaching venture, if we should use so dubious11 a term in speaking of profits so certain.
Compared with the Fantaisian connection, the whole commerce of the world appeared to the Vraibleusians a retail12 business. All other customers were neglected or discarded, and each individual seemed to concentrate his resources to supply the wants of a country where they dance by moonlight, live on fruit, and sleep on flowers. At length the first fleet of five hundred sail, laden13 with wonderful specimens14 of Vraibleusian mechanism15, and innumerable bales of Vraibleusian manufactures; articles raw and refined, goods dry and damp, wholesale16 and retail; silks and woollen cloths; cottons, cutlery, and camlets; flannels17 and ladies’ albums; under waistcoats, kid gloves, engravings, coats, cloaks, and ottomans; lamps and looking-glasses; sofas, round tables, equipages, and scent-bottles; fans and tissue-flowers; porcelain18, poetry, novels, newspapers, and cookery books; bear’s-grease, blue pills, and bijouterie; arms, beards, poodles, pages, mustachios, court-guides, and bon-bons; music, pictures, ladies’ maids, scrapbooks, buckles19, boxing-gloves, guitars, and snuff-boxes; together with a company of opera-singers, a band of comedians20, a popular preacher, some quacks21, lecturers, artists, and literary gentlemen, principally sketch-book men, quitted, one day, with a favourable22 wind, and amid the exultation23 of the inhabitants, the port of Hubbabub!
When his Excellency Prince Popanilla heard of the contents of this stupendous cargo24, notwithstanding his implicit25 confidence in the superior genius and useful knowledge of the Vraibleusians, he could not refrain from expressing a doubt whether, in the present undeveloped state of his native land, any returns could be made proportionate to so curious and elaborate an importation; but whenever he ventured to intimate his opinion to any of the most commercial nation in the world he was only listened to with an incredulous smile which seemed to pity his inexperience, or told, with an air of profound self-complacency, that in Fantaisie ‘there must be great resources.’
In the meantime, public companies were formed for working the mines, colonizing26 the waste lands, and cutting the coral rocks of the Indian Isle, of all which associations Popanilla was chosen Director by acclamation. These, however, it must be confessed, were speculations27 of a somewhat doubtful nature; but the Branch Bank Society of the Isle of Fantaisie really held out flattering prospects28.
When the fleet had sailed they gave Popanilla a public dinner. It was attended by all the principal men in the island, and he made a speech, which was received in a rather different manner than was his sunset oration29 by the monarch30 whom he now represented. Faintaisie and its accomplished31 Envoy32 were at the same time the highest and the universal fashion. The ladies sang la Syrene, dressed their hair la Mermede, and themselves la Fantastique; which, by-the-bye, was not new; and the gentlemen wore boa-constrictor cravats33 and waltzed la mer Indienne—a title probably suggested by a remembrance of the dangers of the sea.
It was soon discovered that, without taking into consideration the average annual advantages which would necessarily spring from their new connection, the profits which must accrue34 upon the present expedition alone had already doubled the capital of the island. Everybody in Vraibleusia had either made a fortune, or laid the foundation of one. The penniless had become prosperous, and the principal merchants and manufacturers, having realised large capitals, retired35 from business. But the colossal36 fortunes were made by the gentlemen who had assisted the administration in raising the price of the public funds and in managing the issues of the pink shells. The effect of this immense increase of the national wealth and of this creation of new and powerful classes of society was speedily felt. Great moves to the westward37 were perpetual, and a variety of sumptuous38 squares and streets were immediately run up in that chosen land. Butlers were at a premium39; coach-makers never slept; card-engravers, having exhausted40 copper41, had recourse to steel; and the demand for arms at the Heralds’ College was so great that even the mystical genius of Garter was exhausted, and hostile meetings were commenced between the junior members of some ancient families, to whom the same crest42 had been unwittingly apportioned43; but, the seconds interfering44, they discovered themselves to be relations. All the eldest45 sons were immediately to get into Parliament, and all the younger ones as quickly into the Guards; and the simple Fantaisian Envoy, who had the peculiar46 felicity of taking everything au pied du lettre, made a calculation that, if these arrangements were duly effected, in a short time the Vraibleusian representatives would exceed the Vraibleusian represented; and that there would be at least three officers in the Vraibleusian guards to every private. Judging from the beards and mustachios which now abounded47, this great result was near at hand. With the snub nose which is the characteristic of the millionaires, these appendages48 produce a pleasing effect.
When the excitement had a little subsided49; when their mighty50 mansions51 were magnificently furnished; when their bright equipages were fairly launched, and the due complement52 of their liveried retainers perfected; when, in short, they had imitated the aristocracy in every point in which wealth could rival blood: then the new people discovered with dismay that one thing was yet wanting, which treasure could not purchase, and which the wit of others could not supply—Manner. In homely53 phrase, the millionaires did not know how to behave themselves. Accustomed to the counting-house, the factory, or the exchange, they looked queer in saloons, and said ‘Sir!’ when they addressed you; and seemed stiff, and hard, and hot. Then the solecisms they committed in more formal society, oh! they were outrageous54; and a leading article in an eminent55 journal was actually written upon the subject. I dare not write the deeds they did; but it was whispered that when they drank wine they filled their glasses to the very brim. All this delighted the old class, who were as envious56 of their riches as the new people were emulous of their style.
In any other country except Vraibleusia persons so situated57 would have consoled themselves for their disagreeable position by a consciousness that their posterity58 would not be annoyed by the same deficiencies; but the wonderful Vraibleusian people resembled no other, even in their failings. They determined59 to acquire in a day that which had hitherto been deemed the gradual consequence of tedious education.
A ‘Society for the Diffusion60 of Fashionable Knowledge’ was announced; the Millionaires looked triumphantly61 mysterious, the aristocrats62 quizzed. The object of the society is intimated by its title; and the method by which its institutors proposed to attain63 this object was the periodical publication of pamphlets, under the superintendence of a competent committee. The first treatise64 appeared: its subject was NONCHALANCE65. It instructed its students ever to appear inattentive in the society of men, and heartless when they conversed66 with women. It taught them not to understand a man if he were witty67; to misunderstand him if he were eloquent68; to yawn or stare if he chanced to elevate his voice, or presumed to ruffle69 the placidity70 of the social calm by addressing his fellow-creatures with teeth unparted. Excellence71 was never to be recognised, but only disparaged72 with a look: an opinion or a sentiment, and the nonchalant was lost for ever. For these, he was to substitute a smile like a damp sunbeam, a moderate curl of the upper lip, and the all-speaking and perpetual shrug73 of the shoulders. By a skilful8 management of these qualities it was shown to be easy to ruin another’s reputation and ensure your own without ever opening your mouth. To woman, this exquisite74 treatise said much in few words: ‘Listlessness, listlessness, listlessness,’ was the edict by which the most beautiful works of nature were to be regulated, who are only truly charming when they make us feel and feel themselves. ‘Listlessness, listlessness, listlessness;’ for when you choose not to be listless, the contrast is so striking that the triumph must be complete.
The treatise said much more, which I shall omit. It forgot, however, to remark that this vaunted nonchalance may be the offspring of the most contemptible75 and the most odious76 of passions: and that while it may be exceedingly refined to appear uninterested when others are interested, to witness excellence without emotion, and to listen to genius without animation77, the heart of the Insensible may as often be inflamed78 by Envy as inspired by Fashion.
Dissertations79 ‘On leaving cards,’ ‘On cutting intimate friends,’ ‘On cravats,’ ‘On dinner courses,’ ‘On poor relations.’ ‘On bores,’ ‘On lions,’ were announced as speedily to appear. In the meantime, the Essay on Nonchalance produced the best effects. A ci-devant stockbroker80 cut a Duke dead at his club the day after its publication; and his daughter yawned while his Grace’s eldest son, the Marquess, made her an offer as she was singing ‘Di tanti palpiti.’ The aristocrats got a little frightened, and when an eminent hop-merchant and his lady had asked a dozen Countesses to dinner, and forgot to be at home to receive them, the old class left off quizzing.
The pamphlets, however, continued issuing forth81, and the new people advanced at a rate which was awful. They actually began to originate some ideas of their own, and there was a whisper among the leaders of voting the aristocrats old-fashioned. The Diffusion Society now caused these exalted82 personages great anxiety and uneasiness. They argued that Fashion was a relative quality; that it was quite impossible, and not to be expected, that all people were to aspire83 to be fashionable; that it was not in the nature of things, and that, if it were, society could not exist; that the more their imitators advanced the more they should baffle their imitations; that a first and fashion able class was a necessary consequence of the organisation84 of man; and that a line of demarcation would for ever be drawn85 between them and the other islanders. The warmth and eagerness with which they maintained and promulgated86 their opinions might have tempted87, however, an impartial88 person to suspect that they secretly entertained some doubts of their truth and soundness.
On the other hand, the other party maintained that Fashion was a positive quality; that the moment a person obtained a certain degree of refinement89 he or she became, in fact and essentially90, fashionable; that the views of the old class were unphilosophical and illiberal91, and unworthy of an enlightened age; that men were equal, and that everything is open to everybody; and that when we take into consideration the nature of man, the origin of society, and a few other things, and duly consider the constant inclination92 and progression towards perfection which mankind evince, there was no reason why, in the course of time, the whole nation should not go to Almack’s on the same night.
At this moment of doubt and dispute the Government of Vraibleusia, with that spirit of conciliation93 and liberality and that perfect wisdom for which it had been long celebrated94, caring very little for the old class, whose interest, it well knew, was to support it, and being exceedingly desirous of engaging the affections of the new race, declared in their favour; and acting95 upon that sublime96 scale of measures for which this great nation has always been so famous, the Statue issued an edict that a new literature should be invented, in order at once to complete the education of the Millionaires and the triumph of the Romantic over the Classic School of Manners.
The most eminent writers were, as usual, in the pay of the Government, and BURLINGTON, A TALE OF FASHIONABLE LIFE in three volumes post octavo, was sent forth. Two or three similar works, bearing titles equally euphonious97 and aristocratic, were published daily; and so exquisite was the style of these productions, so naturally artificial the construction of their plots, and so admirably inventive the conception of their characters, that many who had been repulsed98 by the somewhat abstract matter and arid99 style of the treatises100, seduced101 by the interest of a story, and by the dazzling delicacies102 of a charming style, really now picked up a considerable quantity of very useful knowledge; so that when the delighted students had eaten some fifty or sixty imaginary dinners in my lord’s dining-room, and whirled some fifty or sixty imaginary waltzes in my lady’s dancing-room, there was scarcely a brute103 left among the whole Millionaires. But what produced the most beneficial effects on the new people, and excited the greatest indignation and despair among the old class, were some volumes which the Government, with shocking Machiavelism, bribed104 some needy105 scions106 of nobility to scribble107, and which revealed certain secrets vainly believed to be quite sacred and inviolable.
点击收听单词发音
1 diffuse | |
v.扩散;传播;adj.冗长的;四散的,弥漫的 | |
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2 blessings | |
n.(上帝的)祝福( blessing的名词复数 );好事;福分;因祸得福 | |
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3 civilisation | |
n.文明,文化,开化,教化 | |
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4 isle | |
n.小岛,岛 | |
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5 thoroughly | |
adv.完全地,彻底地,十足地 | |
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6 intercourse | |
n.性交;交流,交往,交际 | |
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7 skilfully | |
adv. (美skillfully)熟练地 | |
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8 skilful | |
(=skillful)adj.灵巧的,熟练的 | |
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9 premier | |
adj.首要的;n.总理,首相 | |
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10 mendicant | |
n.乞丐;adj.行乞的 | |
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11 dubious | |
adj.怀疑的,无把握的;有问题的,靠不住的 | |
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12 retail | |
v./n.零售;adv.以零售价格 | |
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13 laden | |
adj.装满了的;充满了的;负了重担的;苦恼的 | |
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14 specimens | |
n.样品( specimen的名词复数 );范例;(化验的)抽样;某种类型的人 | |
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15 mechanism | |
n.机械装置;机构,结构 | |
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16 wholesale | |
n.批发;adv.以批发方式;vt.批发,成批出售 | |
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17 flannels | |
法兰绒男裤; 法兰绒( flannel的名词复数 ) | |
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18 porcelain | |
n.瓷;adj.瓷的,瓷制的 | |
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19 buckles | |
搭扣,扣环( buckle的名词复数 ) | |
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20 comedians | |
n.喜剧演员,丑角( comedian的名词复数 ) | |
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21 quacks | |
abbr.quacksalvers 庸医,骗子(16世纪习惯用水银或汞治疗梅毒的人)n.江湖医生( quack的名词复数 );江湖郎中;(鸭子的)呱呱声v.(鸭子)发出嘎嘎声( quack的第三人称单数 ) | |
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22 favourable | |
adj.赞成的,称赞的,有利的,良好的,顺利的 | |
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23 exultation | |
n.狂喜,得意 | |
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24 cargo | |
n.(一只船或一架飞机运载的)货物 | |
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25 implicit | |
a.暗示的,含蓄的,不明晰的,绝对的 | |
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26 colonizing | |
v.开拓殖民地,移民于殖民地( colonize的现在分词 ) | |
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27 speculations | |
n.投机买卖( speculation的名词复数 );思考;投机活动;推断 | |
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28 prospects | |
n.希望,前途(恒为复数) | |
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29 oration | |
n.演说,致辞,叙述法 | |
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30 monarch | |
n.帝王,君主,最高统治者 | |
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31 accomplished | |
adj.有才艺的;有造诣的;达到了的 | |
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32 envoy | |
n.使节,使者,代表,公使 | |
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33 cravats | |
n.(系在衬衫衣领里面的)男式围巾( cravat的名词复数 ) | |
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34 accrue | |
v.(利息等)增大,增多 | |
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35 retired | |
adj.隐退的,退休的,退役的 | |
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36 colossal | |
adj.异常的,庞大的 | |
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37 westward | |
n.西方,西部;adj.西方的,向西的;adv.向西 | |
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38 sumptuous | |
adj.豪华的,奢侈的,华丽的 | |
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39 premium | |
n.加付款;赠品;adj.高级的;售价高的 | |
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40 exhausted | |
adj.极其疲惫的,精疲力尽的 | |
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41 copper | |
n.铜;铜币;铜器;adj.铜(制)的;(紫)铜色的 | |
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42 crest | |
n.顶点;饰章;羽冠;vt.达到顶点;vi.形成浪尖 | |
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43 apportioned | |
vt.分摊,分配(apportion的过去式与过去分词形式) | |
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44 interfering | |
adj. 妨碍的 动词interfere的现在分词 | |
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45 eldest | |
adj.最年长的,最年老的 | |
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46 peculiar | |
adj.古怪的,异常的;特殊的,特有的 | |
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47 abounded | |
v.大量存在,充满,富于( abound的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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48 appendages | |
n.附属物( appendage的名词复数 );依附的人;附属器官;附属肢体(如臂、腿、尾等) | |
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49 subsided | |
v.(土地)下陷(因在地下采矿)( subside的过去式和过去分词 );减弱;下降至较低或正常水平;一下子坐在椅子等上 | |
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50 mighty | |
adj.强有力的;巨大的 | |
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51 mansions | |
n.宅第,公馆,大厦( mansion的名词复数 ) | |
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52 complement | |
n.补足物,船上的定员;补语;vt.补充,补足 | |
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53 homely | |
adj.家常的,简朴的;不漂亮的 | |
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54 outrageous | |
adj.无理的,令人不能容忍的 | |
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55 eminent | |
adj.显赫的,杰出的,有名的,优良的 | |
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56 envious | |
adj.嫉妒的,羡慕的 | |
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57 situated | |
adj.坐落在...的,处于某种境地的 | |
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58 posterity | |
n.后裔,子孙,后代 | |
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59 determined | |
adj.坚定的;有决心的 | |
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60 diffusion | |
n.流布;普及;散漫 | |
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61 triumphantly | |
ad.得意洋洋地;得胜地;成功地 | |
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62 aristocrats | |
n.贵族( aristocrat的名词复数 ) | |
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63 attain | |
vt.达到,获得,完成 | |
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64 treatise | |
n.专著;(专题)论文 | |
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65 nonchalance | |
n.冷淡,漠不关心 | |
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66 conversed | |
v.交谈,谈话( converse的过去式 ) | |
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67 witty | |
adj.机智的,风趣的 | |
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68 eloquent | |
adj.雄辩的,口才流利的;明白显示出的 | |
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69 ruffle | |
v.弄皱,弄乱;激怒,扰乱;n.褶裥饰边 | |
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70 placidity | |
n.平静,安静,温和 | |
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71 excellence | |
n.优秀,杰出,(pl.)优点,美德 | |
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72 disparaged | |
v.轻视( disparage的过去式和过去分词 );贬低;批评;非难 | |
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73 shrug | |
v.耸肩(表示怀疑、冷漠、不知等) | |
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74 exquisite | |
adj.精美的;敏锐的;剧烈的,感觉强烈的 | |
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75 contemptible | |
adj.可鄙的,可轻视的,卑劣的 | |
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76 odious | |
adj.可憎的,讨厌的 | |
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77 animation | |
n.活泼,兴奋,卡通片/动画片的制作 | |
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78 inflamed | |
adj.发炎的,红肿的v.(使)变红,发怒,过热( inflame的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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79 dissertations | |
专题论文,学位论文( dissertation的名词复数 ) | |
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80 stockbroker | |
n.股票(或证券),经纪人(或机构) | |
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81 forth | |
adv.向前;向外,往外 | |
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82 exalted | |
adj.(地位等)高的,崇高的;尊贵的,高尚的 | |
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83 aspire | |
vi.(to,after)渴望,追求,有志于 | |
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84 organisation | |
n.组织,安排,团体,有机休 | |
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85 drawn | |
v.拖,拉,拔出;adj.憔悴的,紧张的 | |
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86 promulgated | |
v.宣扬(某事物)( promulgate的过去式和过去分词 );传播;公布;颁布(法令、新法律等) | |
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87 tempted | |
v.怂恿(某人)干不正当的事;冒…的险(tempt的过去分词) | |
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88 impartial | |
adj.(in,to)公正的,无偏见的 | |
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89 refinement | |
n.文雅;高尚;精美;精制;精炼 | |
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90 essentially | |
adv.本质上,实质上,基本上 | |
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91 illiberal | |
adj.气量狭小的,吝啬的 | |
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92 inclination | |
n.倾斜;点头;弯腰;斜坡;倾度;倾向;爱好 | |
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93 conciliation | |
n.调解,调停 | |
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94 celebrated | |
adj.有名的,声誉卓著的 | |
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95 acting | |
n.演戏,行为,假装;adj.代理的,临时的,演出用的 | |
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96 sublime | |
adj.崇高的,伟大的;极度的,不顾后果的 | |
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97 euphonious | |
adj.好听的,悦耳的,和谐的 | |
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98 repulsed | |
v.击退( repulse的过去式和过去分词 );驳斥;拒绝 | |
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99 arid | |
adj.干旱的;(土地)贫瘠的 | |
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100 treatises | |
n.专题著作,专题论文,专著( treatise的名词复数 ) | |
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101 seduced | |
诱奸( seduce的过去式和过去分词 ); 勾引; 诱使堕落; 使入迷 | |
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102 delicacies | |
n.棘手( delicacy的名词复数 );精致;精美的食物;周到 | |
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103 brute | |
n.野兽,兽性 | |
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104 bribed | |
v.贿赂( bribe的过去式和过去分词 );向(某人)行贿,贿赂 | |
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105 needy | |
adj.贫穷的,贫困的,生活艰苦的 | |
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106 scions | |
n.接穗,幼枝( scion的名词复数 );(尤指富家)子孙 | |
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107 scribble | |
v.潦草地书写,乱写,滥写;n.潦草的写法,潦草写成的东西,杂文 | |
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