CHAPTER VII TEACHING BY MAIL

 The educational side of the Doctor's post office was a very important one and it grew all the time. As he had said to the Skimmer at the beginning, as soon as the birds and animals realized the helpfulness of having a post office of their own they used it more and more.

And, of course, as Speedy had foretold¹, they wrote most of their letters to the Doctor. Soon the poor man was swamped with mail, asking for medical advice. The Esquimaux sleigh dogs wrote all the way from the Arctic Continent to know what they should do about their hair falling out. Hair—which was all the poor creatures had to keep them warm against the Polar winds—was, of course, very important to them. And John Dolittle spent a whole Saturday and Sunday experimenting with hair tonics² on Jip to find a way to cure their trouble. Jip was very patient about it, knowing that the Doctor was doing it for the good of his fellow dogs. And he did not grumble—although he did mention to Dab-Dab that he felt like a chemist's shop from all the different hair oils the Doctor had used on him. He said they ruined his keen nose entirely³ for two weeks, so he couldn't smell straight.

 

"The Doctor experimented on Jip"

And besides the letters asking for medical advice, the Doctor got all sorts of requests from animals all over the world for information about food for their babies, nesting materials and a thousand other things. In their new thirst for education the animals asked all manner of questions, some of which neither the Doctor nor anybody else could answer: What were the stars made of? Why did the tide rise and fall—and could it be stopped?

Then, in order to deal with this wide demand for information which had been brought about by his post office, John Dolittle started, for the first time in history, courses by correspondence for animals.

And he had printed forms made, called "Things a Young Rabbit Should Know," "The Care of Feet in Frosty Weather," etc., etc. These he sent out by mail in thousands.

And then because so many letters were written him about good manners and proper behavior, he wrote a "Book of Etiquette⁴ for Animals." It is still a very famous work, though copies of it are rare now. But when he wrote it the Doctor printed a first edition of fifty thousand copies and sent them all out by mail in one week. It was at this time, too, that he wrote and circulated another very well-known book of his called "One-Act Plays for Penguins⁵."

But, alas⁶! instead of making the number of letters he had to answer less, the Doctor found that by sending out books of information he increased a hundredfold the already enormous mail he had to attend to.

This is a letter he received from a pig in Patagonia:

"Dear Doctor—I have read your 'Book of Etiquette for Animals' and liked it very much. I am shortly to be married. Would it be proper for me to ask the guests to bring turnips⁷ to my wedding, instead of flowers?

"In introducing one well-bred pig to another should you say 'Miss Virginia Ham, "meet" Mr. Frank Footer,' or 'Get acquainted?'

"Yours truly,     

"Bertha Bacon.

 

"P. S.—I have always worn my engagement ring in my nose. Is this the right place?"

And the Doctor wrote back:

"Dear Bertha—In introducing one pig to another I would avoid using the word 'meet.' 'Get acquainted' is quite all right. Remember that the object of all etiquette and manners should be to make people comfortable—not uncomfortable.

"I think turnips at a wedding quite proper. You might ask the guests to leave the tops on. They will then look more like a bouquet⁸.

"Sincerely yours,     

"John Dolittle."

1 foretold   

v.预言，预示( foretell的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• She foretold that the man would die soon. 她预言那人快要死了。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Must lose one joy, by his life's star foretold. 这样注定：他，为了信守一个盟誓／就非得拿牺牲一个喜悦作代价。 来自英汉 - 翻译样例 - 文学

2 tonics   

n.滋补品( tonic的名词复数 )；主音；奎宁水；浊音

参考例句：

• I think you have a prejudice against tonics. 我认你对补药有偏见。 来自互联网
• Two gin and tonics, please. 请来两杯杜松子酒加奎宁水。 来自互联网

3 entirely   

ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地

参考例句：

• The fire was entirely caused by their neglect of duty. 那场火灾完全是由于他们失职而引起的。
• His life was entirely given up to the educational work. 他的一生统统献给了教育工作。

4 etiquette   

n.礼仪，礼节；规矩

参考例句：

• The rules of etiquette are not so strict nowadays.如今的礼仪规则已不那么严格了。
• According to etiquette,you should stand up to meet a guest.按照礼节你应该站起来接待客人。

5 penguins   

n.企鹅( penguin的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• Why can penguins live in cold environment? 为什么企鹅能生活在寒冷的环境中？ 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Whales, seals, penguins, and turtles have flippers. 鲸、海豹，企鹅和海龟均有鳍形肢。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》

6 alas   

int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等)

参考例句：

• Alas!The window is broken!哎呀！窗子破了！
• Alas,the truth is less romantic.然而，真理很少带有浪漫色彩。

7 turnips   

芜青( turnip的名词复数 )； 芜菁块根； 芜菁甘蓝块根； 怀表

参考例句：

• Well, I like turnips, tomatoes, eggplants, cauliflowers, onions and carrots. 噢，我喜欢大萝卜、西红柿、茄子、菜花、洋葱和胡萝卜。 来自魔法英语-口语突破（高中）
• This is turnip soup, made from real turnips. 这是大头菜汤，用真正的大头菜做的。

8 bouquet   

n.花束，酒香

参考例句：

• This wine has a rich bouquet.这种葡萄酒有浓郁的香气。
• Her wedding bouquet consisted of roses and ivy.她的婚礼花篮包括玫瑰和长春藤。