TO MRS. HAWTHORNE

 TO MRS. HAWTHORNE

 

Salem, March 15th, 1843

 

Dearest wife, Thy letters have all been received; and I know not that I could have kept myself alive without them; for never was my heart so hungry and tired as it is now. I need thee continually wherever I am, and nothing else makes any approach towards satisfying me. Thou hast the easier part—being drawn¹ out of thyself by society; but with me there is an ever-present yearning², which nothing outward seems to have any influence upon. Four whole days must still intervene before we meet—it is too long—too long—we have not so much time to spare out of eternity³.

 

As for this Mr. Billings, I wish he would not be so troublesome. I put a note for him into the Boston Post-Office, directed according to his own request. His scheme is well enough, and might possibly become popular; but it has no peculiar⁴ advantages with reference to myself; nor do the subjects of his proposed books particularly suit my fancy, as themes to write upon. Somebody else 110 will answer his purpose just as well; and I would rather write books of my own imagining than be hired to develope the ideas of an engraver⁵; especially as the pecuniary⁶ prospect⁷ is not better, nor so good, as it might be elsewhere. I intend to adhere to my former plan, of writing one or two mythological⁸ story books, to be published under O'Sullivan's auspices⁹ in New York—which is the only place where books can be published, with a chance of profit. As a matter of courtesy, I may perhaps call on Mr. Billings, if I have time; but I do not intend to be connected with this affair.

 

It is queer news that thou tellest me about the Pioneer. I expected it to fail in due season, but not quite so soon. Shouldst there be an opportunity within a day or two, I wish thou wouldst send for any letters that may be in the Post-Office there; but not unless some person is going thither¹⁰, with intent to return before Wednesday next. If thou receive any, keep them till we meet in Boston.

 

I dreamed the other night that our house was broken open, and all our silver stolen. No matter though it be:—we have steel forks and German silver spoons in plenty, and I only wish that we were to eat our dinner with them to-day. But we shall have gained nothing on the score of snow, and slosh, and mud, by our absence; for the bad 111 walking will be at its very ne plus ultra, next week. Wouldst thou not like to stay just one little fortnight longer in Boston, where the sidewalks afford dry passage to thy little feet? It will be mid-May, at least, ere thou wilt¹¹ find even tolerable walking in Concord¹². So if thou wishest to walk while thou canst, we will put off our return a week longer. Naughty husband that I am! I know by my own heart that thou pinest for our home, and for the bosom¹³ where thou belongest. A week longer! It is a horrible thought.

 

We cannot very well afford to buy a surplus stock of paper, just now. By and by, I should like some, and I suppose there will always be opportunities to get it cheap at auction¹⁴. I do wonder—and always shall wonder, until the matter be reformed—why Providence¹⁵ keeps us so short of cash. Our earnings¹⁶ are miserably¹⁷ scanty¹⁸ at best; yet, if we could but get even that pittance¹⁹, I should continue to be thankful, though certainly for small favors. The world deserves to come to a speedy end, if it were for nothing else save to break down the abominable²⁰ system of credit—of keeping possession of other people's property—which renders it impossible for a man to be just and honest, even if so inclined. It is almost a pity that the comet is retrograding from the earth; it might do away with all our perversities at one 112 smash. And thou, my little dove, and thy husband for thy sake, might be pretty certain of a removal to some sphere where we should have all our present happiness, and none of these earthly inconveniences.

 

Ah, but, for the present, I like this earth better than Paradise itself. I love thee, thou dearest. It is only when away from thee, that the chill winds of the world make me shiver. Thou always keepest me warm, and always wilt; and without thee, I should shiver in Heaven. Dearest, I think I prefer to write thy name "Mrs. Sophia A. Hawthorne," rather than "Mrs. Nathaniel Hawthorne";—the latter gives me an image of myself in petticoats, knitting a stocking. I feel so sensibly that thou art my chastest, holiest wife—a woman and an angel. But thou dost not love to blush in the midst of people.

 

Ownest, expect me next Tuesday in the forenoon; and do not look for another letter. I pray heaven that I may find thee well, and not tired quite to death. Even shouldst thou be so, however, I will restore thee on Wednesday.

 

Mrs. Nathaniel Hawthorne,

Care of Dr. N. Peabody,

Boston, Mass.

 

1 drawn   

v.拖，拉，拔出；adj.憔悴的，紧张的

参考例句：

• All the characters in the story are drawn from life.故事中的所有人物都取材于生活。
• Her gaze was drawn irresistibly to the scene outside.她的目光禁不住被外面的风景所吸引。

2 yearning   

a.渴望的；向往的；怀念的

参考例句：

• a yearning for a quiet life 对宁静生活的向往
• He felt a great yearning after his old job. 他对过去的工作有一种强烈的渴想。

3 eternity   

n.不朽，来世；永恒，无穷

参考例句：

• The dull play seemed to last an eternity.这场乏味的剧似乎演个没完没了。
• Finally,Ying Tai and Shan Bo could be together for all of eternity.英台和山伯终能双宿双飞，永世相随。

4 peculiar   

adj.古怪的，异常的；特殊的，特有的

参考例句：

• He walks in a peculiar fashion.他走路的样子很奇特。
• He looked at me with a very peculiar expression.他用一种很奇怪的表情看着我。

5 engraver   

n.雕刻师，雕工

参考例句：

• He was a sketcher and a copper-plate engraver. 他也是杰出的素描家和铜版画家。 来自辞典例句
• He was once an engraver in a printing factory. 他以前是印刷厂的一名刻工。 来自互联网

6 pecuniary   

adj.金钱的；金钱上的

参考例句：

• She denies obtaining a pecuniary advantage by deception.她否认通过欺骗手段获得经济利益。
• She is so independent that she refused all pecuniary aid.她很独立，所以拒绝一切金钱上的资助。

7 prospect   

n.前景，前途；景色，视野

参考例句：

• This state of things holds out a cheerful prospect.事态呈现出可喜的前景。
• The prospect became more evident.前景变得更加明朗了。

8 mythological   

adj.神话的

参考例句：

• He is remembered for his historical and mythological works. 他以其带有历史感和神话色彩的作品而著称。
• But even so, the cumulative process had for most Americans a deep, almost mythological significance. 不过即使如此，移民渐增的过程，对于大部分美国人，还是意味深长的，几乎有不可思议的影响。

9 auspices   

n.资助，赞助

参考例句：

• The association is under the auspices of Word Bank.这个组织是在世界银行的赞助下办的。
• The examination was held under the auspices of the government.这次考试是由政府主办的。

10 thither   

adv.向那里；adj.在那边的，对岸的

参考例句：

• He wandered hither and thither looking for a playmate.他逛来逛去找玩伴。
• He tramped hither and thither.他到处流浪。

11 wilt   

v.(使)植物凋谢或枯萎；(指人)疲倦，衰弱

参考例句：

• Golden roses do not wilt and will never need to be watered.金色的玫瑰不枯萎绝也不需要浇水。
• Several sleepless nights made him wilt.数个不眠之夜使他憔悴。

12 concord   

n.和谐；协调

参考例句：

• These states had lived in concord for centuries.这些国家几个世纪以来一直和睦相处。
• His speech did nothing for racial concord.他的讲话对种族和谐没有作用。

13 bosom   

n.胸，胸部；胸怀；内心；adj.亲密的

参考例句：

• She drew a little book from her bosom.她从怀里取出一本小册子。
• A dark jealousy stirred in his bosom.他内心生出一阵恶毒的嫉妒。

14 auction   

n.拍卖；拍卖会；vt.拍卖

参考例句：

• They've put the contents of their house up for auction.他们把房子里的东西全都拿去拍卖了。
• They bought a new minibus with the proceeds from the auction.他们用拍卖得来的钱买了一辆新面包车。

15 providence   

n.深谋远虑，天道，天意；远见；节约；上帝

参考例句：

• It is tempting Providence to go in that old boat.乘那艘旧船前往是冒大险。
• To act as you have done is to fly in the face of Providence.照你的所作所为那样去行事，是违背上帝的意志的。

16 earnings   

n.工资收人；利润，利益，所得

参考例句：

• That old man lives on the earnings of his daughter.那个老人靠他女儿的收入维持生活。
• Last year there was a 20% decrease in his earnings.去年他的收入减少了20%。

17 miserably   

adv.痛苦地；悲惨地；糟糕地；极度地

参考例句：

• The little girl was wailing miserably. 那小女孩难过得号啕大哭。
• It was drizzling, and miserably cold and damp. 外面下着毛毛细雨，天气又冷又湿，令人难受。 来自《简明英汉词典》

18 scanty   

adj.缺乏的，仅有的，节省的，狭小的，不够的

参考例句：

• There is scanty evidence to support their accusations.他们的指控证据不足。
• The rainfall was rather scanty this month.这个月的雨量不足。

19 pittance   

n.微薄的薪水，少量

参考例句：

• Her secretaries work tirelessly for a pittance.她的秘书们为一点微薄的工资不知疲倦地工作。
• The widow must live on her slender pittance.那寡妇只能靠自己微薄的收入过活。

20 abominable   

adj.可厌的，令人憎恶的

参考例句：

• Their cruel treatment of prisoners was abominable.他们虐待犯人的做法令人厌恶。
• The sanitary conditions in this restaurant are abominable.这家饭馆的卫生状况糟透了。