TO MRS. HAWTHORNE

 TO MRS. HAWTHORNE

 

 

Liverpool, February 7th, 1856

 

Thy letter, my own most beloved, (dated Jany. 31st) arrived yesterday, and revived me at once out of a state of half-torpor, half misery—just as much of each as could co-exist with the other. Do not think that I am always in that state; but one thing, dearest, I have been most thoroughly¹ taught by this separation—that is, the absolute necessity of expression. I must tell thee I love thee. I must be told that thou lovest me. It must be said in words and symbolized² with caresses³; or else, at last, imprisoned⁴ Love will go frantic⁵, and tear all to pieces the heart that holds it. And the only other alternative is to be torpid⁶. I just manage to hold out from one letter of thine to another; and then comes life and joy again. Thou canst not conceive what an effect yesterday's letter had on me. It renewed my youth, and made my step lighter⁷; it absolutely gave me an appetite; and I went to 239 bed joyfully⁸ to think of it. Oh, my wife, why did God give thee to poor unworthy me! Art thou sure that He made thee for me? Ah, thy intuition must have been well-founded on this point; because, otherwise, all through eternity¹⁰, thou wouldst carry my stain upon thee; and how could thine own angel ever need thee then! Thou art mine!—Thou shalt be mine! Thou hast given thyself to me irredeemably. Thou hast grown to me. Thou canst never get away.

 

Oh, my love, it is a desperate thing that I cannot see thee this very instant. Dost thou ever feel, at one and the same moment, the impossibility of doing without me, and also the impossibility of having me? I know not how it is that my strong wishes do not bring thee here bodily, while I am writing these words. One of the two impossibilities must needs be overcome; and it seems the strongest impossibility that thou shouldst be anywhere else, when I need thee so insufferably.

 

Well, my own wife, I have a little wreaked¹¹ myself now, and will go on more quietly with what I have further to say. As regards O'Sullivan—(how funny that thou shouldst put quotation¹² marks to this name, as if astonished at my calling him so! Did we not entirely¹³ agree in 240 thinking "John" an undue¹⁴ and undesirable¹⁵ familiarity? But thou mayst call him "John," or "Jack¹⁶" either, as best suits thee.)—as regards O'Sullivan, then, my present opinion of him is precisely¹⁷ what thou thyself didst leave upon my mind, in our discussions of his character. I have often had a similar experience before, resulting from thy criticism upon any views of mine. Thou insensibly convertest me to thy own opinion, and art afterwards surprised to find it so; in fact, I seldom am aware of the change in my own mind, until the subject chances to come up for further discussion, and I find myself on what was thy side.

 

But I will try to give my true idea of his character. I know that he has most vivid affections—a quick, womanly sensibility—a light and tender grace, which, in happy circumstances, would make all his deeds and demonstrations¹⁹ beautiful. In respect to companionship, beyond all doubt, he has never been in such fortunate circumstances as during his present intercourse²⁰ with thee; and I am willing to allow that thou bringest out his angelic part, and therefore canst not be expected to see anything but an angel in him. It has sometimes seemed to me that the lustre²¹ of his angel-plumage has been a little dimmed—his 241 heavenly garments a little soiled and bedraggled—by the foul²² ways through which it has been his fate to tread, and the foul companions with whom necessity and politics have brought him acquainted. But I had rather thou shouldst take him for a friend than any other man I ever knew (unless, perhaps, George Bradford, who can hardly be reckoned a man at all,) because I think the Devil has a smaller share in O'Sullivan than in other bipeds who wear breeches. To do him justice, he is miraculously²³ pure and true, considering what his outward life has been. Now, dearest, I have a genuine affection for him, and a confidence in his honor; and as respects his defects in everything that concerns pecuniary²⁴ matters, I believe him to have kept his integrity intact to a degree that is really wonderful, in spite of the embarrassments²⁵ of a lifetime. If we had his whole life mapped out before us, I should probably forgive him some things which thy severer sense of right would condemn²⁶. Thou talkest of his high principle; but that does not appear to me to be his kind of moral endowment. Perhaps he may have the material that principles are manufactured from.

 

My beloved, he is not the man in whom I see my ideal of a friend; not for his lack of principle, 242 not for any ill-deeds or practical shortcomings which I know of or suspect; not but what he is amiable²⁷, loveable, fully⁹ capable of self-sacrifice, utterly²⁸ incapable²⁹ of selfishness. The only reason, that I can put into words, is, that he never stirs me to any depth beneath my surface; I like him, and enjoy his society, and he calls up, I think, whatever small part of me is elegant and agreeable; but neither of my best nor of my worst has he ever, or could he ever, have a glimpse. I should wish my friend of friends to be a sterner and grimmer man than he; and it is my opinion, sweetest wife, that the truest manly¹⁸ delicacy³⁰ is to be found in those stern, grim natures—a little alpine³¹ flower, of tenderest texture³², and loveliest hue³³, and delicious fragrance³⁴, springing out of a rocky soil in a high, breezy, mountain atmosphere. O'Sullivan's quick, genial³⁵ soil produces an abundant growth of flowers, but not just this precious little flower. He is too much like a woman, without being a woman; and between the two characters, he misses the quintessential delicacy of both. There are some tests of thorough refinement³⁶ which, perhaps, he could not stand. And yet I shall not dispute that for refinement and delicacy he is one out of a thousand; and we might spend a lifetime together 243 without putting him to a test too severe. As for his sympathies, he would be always ready to pour them out (not exactly like Niagara, but like a copious³⁷ garden-fountain) for those he loved.

 

If thou thinkest I have done him great injustice³⁸ in the foregoing sketch³⁹, it is very probable that thou wilt⁴⁰ bring me over to thy way of thinking; and perhaps balance matters by passing over to mine.

 

Dearest, I do hope I shall next hear of thee from Madeira; for this suspense⁴¹ is hard to bear. Thou must not mind what I say to thee, in my impatient agonies, about coming back. Whatever can be borne, I shall find myself able to bear, for the sake of restoring thee to health. I have now groped so far through the thick darkness that [a] little glimmer⁴² of light begins to appear at the other end of the passage; it will grow clearer and brighter continually, and at last it will show me my dearest wife. I do hope thou wilt find thy husband wiser and better than he has been hitherto; wiser, in knowing the more adequately what a treasure he has in thee; and better, because I feel it such a shame to be loved by thee without deserving it. Dost thou love me?

 

Give my love to Una, to whom I cannot write 244 now, without doubling the postage. Do not let little Rosebud⁴³ forget me. Remember me to Fanny, and present my regards to Madame O'Sullivan, and Mrs. Susan, and Miss Rodgers. So all is said very properly.

 

Thou toldest me not to write to Madeira before hearing from thee there; but I shall send this to the care of the American Consul⁴⁴, to whom I wrote by the last Lisbon steamer, sending the letter to O'Sullivan's care. Thine own-ownest.

 

Julian is perfectly⁴⁵ well.

1 thoroughly   

adv.完全地，彻底地，十足地

参考例句：

• The soil must be thoroughly turned over before planting.一定要先把土地深翻一遍再下种。
• The soldiers have been thoroughly instructed in the care of their weapons.士兵们都系统地接受过保护武器的训练。

2 symbolized   

v.象征，作为…的象征( symbolize的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• For Tigress, Joy symbolized the best a woman could expect from life. 在她看，小福子就足代表女人所应有的享受。 来自汉英文学 - 骆驼祥子
• A car symbolized distinction and achievement, and he was proud. 汽车象征着荣誉和成功，所以他很自豪。 来自辞典例句

3 caresses   

爱抚，抚摸( caress的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• A breeze caresses the cheeks. 微风拂面。
• Hetty was not sufficiently familiar with caresses or outward demonstrations of fondness. 海蒂不习惯于拥抱之类过于外露地表现自己的感情。

4 imprisoned   

下狱，监禁( imprison的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• He was imprisoned for two concurrent terms of 30 months and 18 months. 他被判处30个月和18个月的监禁，合并执行。
• They were imprisoned for possession of drugs. 他们因拥有毒品而被监禁。

5 frantic   

adj.狂乱的，错乱的，激昂的

参考例句：

• I've had a frantic rush to get my work done.我急急忙忙地赶完工作。
• He made frantic dash for the departing train.他发疯似地冲向正开出的火车。

6 torpid   

adj.麻痹的，麻木的，迟钝的

参考例句：

• He just walked and his mind drifted slowly like a torpid stream.他只是埋头走，脑袋里思想都凝滞了，有如一汪流不动的溪水。
• Even when he was awake he was completely torpid.他醒着的时候也完全麻木不动。

7 lighter   

n.打火机，点火器；驳船；v.用驳船运送；light的比较级

参考例句：

• The portrait was touched up so as to make it lighter.这张画经过润色，色调明朗了一些。
• The lighter works off the car battery.引燃器利用汽车蓄电池打火。

8 joyfully   

adv. 喜悦地, 高兴地

参考例句：

• She tripped along joyfully as if treading on air. 她高兴地走着，脚底下轻飘飘的。
• During these first weeks she slaved joyfully. 在最初的几周里，她干得很高兴。

9 fully   

adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地

参考例句：

• The doctor asked me to breathe in,then to breathe out fully.医生让我先吸气，然后全部呼出。
• They soon became fully integrated into the local community.他们很快就完全融入了当地人的圈子。

10 eternity   

n.不朽，来世；永恒，无穷

参考例句：

• The dull play seemed to last an eternity.这场乏味的剧似乎演个没完没了。
• Finally,Ying Tai and Shan Bo could be together for all of eternity.英台和山伯终能双宿双飞，永世相随。

11 wreaked   

诉诸（武力），施行（暴力），发（脾气）( wreak的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• The earthquake wreaked havoc on the city. 地震对这个城市造成了大破坏。
• They have wreaked dreadful havoc among the wildlife by shooting and trapping. 他们射杀和诱捕野生动物，造成了严重的破坏。

12 quotation   

n.引文，引语，语录；报价，牌价，行情

参考例句：

• He finished his speech with a quotation from Shakespeare.他讲话结束时引用了莎士比亚的语录。
• The quotation is omitted here.此处引文从略。

13 entirely   

ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地

参考例句：

• The fire was entirely caused by their neglect of duty. 那场火灾完全是由于他们失职而引起的。
• His life was entirely given up to the educational work. 他的一生统统献给了教育工作。

14 undue   

adj.过分的；不适当的；未到期的

参考例句：

• Don't treat the matter with undue haste.不要过急地处理此事。
• It would be wise not to give undue importance to his criticisms.最好不要过分看重他的批评。

15 undesirable   

adj.不受欢迎的，不良的，不合意的，讨厌的；n.不受欢迎的人，不良分子

参考例句：

• They are the undesirable elements among the employees.他们是雇员中的不良分子。
• Certain chemicals can induce undesirable changes in the nervous system.有些化学物质能在神经系统中引起不良变化。

16 jack   

n.插座，千斤顶，男人；v.抬起，提醒，扛举；n.（Jake）杰克

参考例句：

• I am looking for the headphone jack.我正在找寻头戴式耳机插孔。
• He lifted the car with a jack to change the flat tyre.他用千斤顶把车顶起来换下瘪轮胎。

17 precisely   

adv.恰好，正好，精确地，细致地

参考例句：

• It's precisely that sort of slick sales-talk that I mistrust.我不相信的正是那种油腔滑调的推销宣传。
• The man adjusted very precisely.那个人调得很准。

18 manly   

adj.有男子气概的；adv.男子般地，果断地

参考例句：

• The boy walked with a confident manly stride.这男孩以自信的男人步伐行走。
• He set himself manly tasks and expected others to follow his example.他给自己定下了男子汉的任务，并希望别人效之。

19 demonstrations   

证明( demonstration的名词复数 )； 表明； 表达； 游行示威

参考例句：

• Lectures will be interspersed with practical demonstrations. 讲课中将不时插入实际示范。
• The new military government has banned strikes and demonstrations. 新的军人政府禁止罢工和示威活动。

20 intercourse   

n.性交；交流，交往，交际

参考例句：

• The magazine becomes a cultural medium of intercourse between the two peoples.该杂志成为两民族间文化交流的媒介。
• There was close intercourse between them.他们过往很密。

21 lustre   

n.光亮，光泽；荣誉

参考例句：

• The sun was shining with uncommon lustre.太阳放射出异常的光彩。
• A good name keeps its lustre in the dark.一个好的名誉在黑暗中也保持它的光辉。

22 foul   

adj.污秽的；邪恶的；v.弄脏；妨害；犯规；n.犯规

参考例句：

• Take off those foul clothes and let me wash them.脱下那些脏衣服让我洗一洗。
• What a foul day it is!多么恶劣的天气！

23 miraculously   

ad.奇迹般地

参考例句：

• He had been miraculously saved from almost certain death. 他奇迹般地从死亡线上获救。
• A schoolboy miraculously survived a 25 000-volt electric shock. 一名男学生在遭受2.5 万伏的电击后奇迹般地活了下来。

24 pecuniary   

adj.金钱的；金钱上的

参考例句：

• She denies obtaining a pecuniary advantage by deception.她否认通过欺骗手段获得经济利益。
• She is so independent that she refused all pecuniary aid.她很独立，所以拒绝一切金钱上的资助。

25 embarrassments   

n.尴尬( embarrassment的名词复数 )；难堪；局促不安；令人难堪或耻辱的事

参考例句：

• But there have been many embarrassments along the way. 但是一路走来已经是窘境不断。 来自互联网
• The embarrassments don't stop there. 让人难受的事情还没完。 来自互联网

26 condemn   

vt.谴责，指责；宣判(罪犯)，判刑

参考例句：

• Some praise him,whereas others condemn him.有些人赞扬他，而有些人谴责他。
• We mustn't condemn him on mere suppositions.我们不可全凭臆测来指责他。

27 amiable   

adj.和蔼可亲的，友善的，亲切的

参考例句：

• She was a very kind and amiable old woman.她是个善良和气的老太太。
• We have a very amiable companionship.我们之间存在一种友好的关系。

28 utterly   

adv.完全地，绝对地

参考例句：

• Utterly devoted to the people,he gave his life in saving his patients.他忠于人民，把毕生精力用于挽救患者的生命。
• I was utterly ravished by the way she smiled.她的微笑使我完全陶醉了。

29 incapable   

adj.无能力的，不能做某事的

参考例句：

• He would be incapable of committing such a cruel deed.他不会做出这么残忍的事。
• Computers are incapable of creative thought.计算机不会创造性地思维。

30 delicacy   

n.精致，细微，微妙，精良；美味，佳肴

参考例句：

• We admired the delicacy of the craftsmanship.我们佩服工艺师精巧的手艺。
• He sensed the delicacy of the situation.他感觉到了形势的微妙。

31 alpine   

adj.高山的；n.高山植物

参考例句：

• Alpine flowers are abundant there.那里有很多高山地带的花。
• Its main attractions are alpine lakes and waterfalls .它以高山湖泊和瀑布群为主要特色。

32 texture   

n.(织物)质地；(材料)构造；结构；肌理

参考例句：

• We could feel the smooth texture of silk.我们能感觉出丝绸的光滑质地。
• Her skin has a fine texture.她的皮肤细腻。

33 hue   

n.色度；色调；样子

参考例句：

• The diamond shone with every hue under the sun.金刚石在阳光下放出五颜六色的光芒。
• The same hue will look different in different light.同一颜色在不同的光线下看起来会有所不同。

34 fragrance   

n.芬芳，香味，香气

参考例句：

• The apple blossoms filled the air with their fragrance.苹果花使空气充满香味。
• The fragrance of lavender filled the room.房间里充满了薰衣草的香味。

35 genial   

adj.亲切的，和蔼的，愉快的，脾气好的

参考例句：

• Orlando is a genial man.奥兰多是一位和蔼可亲的人。
• He was a warm-hearted friend and genial host.他是个热心的朋友，也是友善待客的主人。

36 refinement   

n.文雅；高尚；精美；精制；精炼

参考例句：

• Sally is a woman of great refinement and beauty. 莎莉是个温文尔雅又很漂亮的女士。
• Good manners and correct speech are marks of refinement.彬彬有礼和谈吐得体是文雅的标志。

37 copious   

adj.丰富的，大量的

参考例句：

• She supports her theory with copious evidences.她以大量的例证来充实自己的理论。
• Every star is a copious source of neutrinos.每颗恒星都是丰富的中微子源。

38 injustice   

n.非正义，不公正，不公平，侵犯（别人的）权利

参考例句：

• They complained of injustice in the way they had been treated.他们抱怨受到不公平的对待。
• All his life he has been struggling against injustice.他一生都在与不公正现象作斗争。

39 sketch   

n.草图；梗概；素描；v.素描；概述

参考例句：

• My sister often goes into the country to sketch. 我姐姐常到乡间去写生。
• I will send you a slight sketch of the house.我将给你寄去房屋的草图。

40 wilt   

v.(使)植物凋谢或枯萎；(指人)疲倦，衰弱

参考例句：

• Golden roses do not wilt and will never need to be watered.金色的玫瑰不枯萎绝也不需要浇水。
• Several sleepless nights made him wilt.数个不眠之夜使他憔悴。

41 suspense   

n.（对可能发生的事）紧张感，担心，挂虑

参考例句：

• The suspense was unbearable.这样提心吊胆的状况实在叫人受不了。
• The director used ingenious devices to keep the audience in suspense.导演用巧妙手法引起观众的悬念。

42 glimmer   

v.发出闪烁的微光；n.微光，微弱的闪光

参考例句：

• I looked at her and felt a glimmer of hope.我注视她，感到了一线希望。
• A glimmer of amusement showed in her eyes.她的眼中露出一丝笑意。

43 rosebud   

n.蔷薇花蕾，妙龄少女

参考例句：

• At West Ham he was thought of as the rosebud that never properly flowered.在西汉姆他被认为是一个尚未开放的花蕾。
• Unlike the Rosebud salve,this stuff is actually worth the money.跟玫瑰花蕾膏不一样，这个更值的买。

44 consul   

n.领事；执政官

参考例句：

• A consul's duty is to help his own nationals.领事的职责是帮助自己的同胞。
• He'll hold the post of consul general for the United States at Shanghai.他将就任美国驻上海总领事(的职务)。

45 perfectly   

adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地

参考例句：

• The witnesses were each perfectly certain of what they said.证人们个个对自己所说的话十分肯定。
• Everything that we're doing is all perfectly above board.我们做的每件事情都是光明正大的。