The first time I left Droneville, was for the purpose of joining the Junior Class in Yale College. Having received letters of introduction to Dr. ——, I was ushered1 by his misjudged kindness, with all my awkwardness upon me, into the very center of fashionable life. Fashionable life! what a variety of blunders, of ludicrous mistakes, of embarrassing scenes, rise up at the very phrase, mingled2 with the uproarious laughter of young men, and the suppressed titter of young ladies, the mere3 memory of which is sufficient to drive distracted a sensitive man. To my miserable4, rustic5 education, I am indebted for a great share of my calamities6. Before relating my experience in the world of fashion, I will attempt to convey to my readers an idea of some of the peculiarities7 of Droneville people.
In one of the western counties of Massachusetts, is situated8 the village of Droneville—the Rip Van Winkle of the state—the very focus of stupidity. Droneville people are a century behind the rest of the world. One would imagine that old Time had pitched them26 out of his car in 1700, while he has been driving on the rest of the world like Jehu. Without the least scruple10, they use those rank provincialisms, which would make the most legitimate11 Yankee tongue of other parts, feel “considerably streaked12.” Droneville people are opposed to all your modern refinements13 in education. “We are satisfied with the language of our fathers, without bringing it to the test of any of your grammar rules.” As a necessary consequence, the king’s English is murdered by them without the least mercy. Double comparatives and superlatives dance through their conversation in an intricate maze14 of the sublimest15 obscurity. To Droneville people I was indebted for my pure, classical dialect, which was so extremely pleasing that I never addressed a polite speech to a young lady, without making her giggle16 in spite of her most vigorous efforts. “Hisen” and “hern,” “yourn” and “theirn,” and such phrases, might be expected as a matter of course; but Droneville people are no common Yankees; they have words and expressions which are perfectly17 unique. “Chirk” is a favorite of theirs. If you enquire18 respecting some invalid19 who is convalescing20, the answer is, “he is more chirk.” A young Miss of Droneville, (for whom, by the way, I always had a sneaking21 partiality,) once replied to a question as to her mother’s health—an old bedridden dame22 of eighty, “Why, she is not very chirk, but more chirker than she has been; all our folks appear more chirker than they really feel, in order to chirk her up.” “Comper” is another of their expressions. Any fracas23 or tumult24, like the Calethump of Christmas eve memory, would be styled by them a “comper.” Their language is certainly original:
“Mrs. Doublechin, what is the matter with your good man?”
“I don’t hardly know, ‘Squire, he seems to be kinder fevery and kinder aguery.”
Droneville people are profound philosophers. You will not find them chattering25 incessantly26 upon every topic under the sun; their ideas are connected by none of your “obvious relations;” they are slow, but sure thinkers, and when they do speak, you may expect to hear something. Catch Droneville people doing any thing in a rash, hasty manner? catch a weasel asleep. They are equally considerate in their mental and physical operations. If a man begins to build a house, without reflecting upon it for some twenty years, Droneville people shake their heads in a very significant manner, muttering something about not “counting the cost.” A house is commenced by one generation, allowed to “season” through another, and completed by the third. Droneville people are not composed of any of your inflammable materials; you will not find them acting27 under the influence of “excitement” or “passion.” They like to “take things coolly”—to think deliberately28.
Deacon Snuffle was informed that widow Switchtail had been recently converted, and hastened to converse29 with her. “How long is it, Mrs. Switchtail,” said he, “since you first began to see the error of your ways?”
27 “Why, Deacon, it is as long ago as what we old folks call the hard winter.” Deacon Snuffle made his exit with all imaginable speed, exclaiming, “your religion, widow, is something like an old clock, in considerable need of being wound up.”
A minister was “settled” among Droneville people, several years since, who is about as ardent30 as they are phlegmatic31, suggesting the image of a spirited young steed, yoked32 to a contemplative ox. He exhorts33, preaches, frets34, drives his flesh off in attempting to “rouse them up;” but they take it “just as easy” as conceivable. What can be more tantalizing35! He appoints meetings upon week days, but Droneville people are not so fond of meetings upon week days; it savors36 too much of driving people into religion. The parson consoles himself with the thought that they will come to church upon the Sabbath, and prepares for them a warm reception. And they do come upon the Sabbath, and sleep, yea, snore as loud as if they were in their beds. Miss Catnip, a snappish old maid, once complained that “Deacon Snuffle’s wife snored so loud that she couldn’t get the least bit of rest.” My Aunt Tabitha is never absent from church. She has so constantly seated herself upon the same bench, that she has fairly impressed her own proportions there. She has one invariable reply to the parson’s oft repeated exhortations37, “young people may die, old people must die.”
The parson wishes to do great things for all the benevolent38 operations of the day, but what do Droneville people know about benevolent operations? Instruct them? “Droneville people ar’nt to be instructed; they know a thing or two.” Besides, Droneville people are half inclined to think that “charity begins at home.” Turn them? You may turn a mule39, when he has once “placed his foot down,” with a mule’s determination, but there is no turning them. They are as obstinate40 and headstrong as doctors of theology; coaxing41 and cuffs42 are equally unavailing.
There is nothing which Droneville people resist so much as innovation. An attempt to change old customs, or to drive them from the well trodden path of their ancestors, will raise such a cackling among long-winded gossippers and slippery tongued spinsters, as would drive Beelzebub himself from the roost. Mr. Long Metre—a member of that fraternity who wander about teaching one half of the people how they can best squeal43 off the ears of the other half—attempted to reform Droneville choir44. This Radical45 broached46 the theory, that it was impossible for the young ladies to sing melodiously47 while they wore their bonnets48, since the sweet nightingales were prevented from hearing their neighbors’ voices. The singing master, having been joined by a few of the young bucks50—bold fellows these—venturing sometimes to give the ‘gals’ a sneaking glance or a sly wink9, made a movement to carry the reform into operation. What pen can describe the “comper” which this excited! It was too much for the equanimity51 of the gentlemen of the old school. It was like touching52 a torch to their beards. Oh Droneville! who28 would have thought, that the flames of party animosity could ever have been kindled53 in thy peaceful streets? yet such was the fact. Every man, woman, and child, was ranged under the banner of the bonnets, or the anti-bonnets. The bonnets claimed, “that the measure of their opponents was an unheard-of innovation, exposing the health of the ‘little dears,’ encouraging extravagance in dress, endangering the morals of the young men, in short, that it was wholly unrighteous, unscriptural and indelicate, for St. Paul expressly declares that ‘every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered, dishonoreth her head.’” I noticed that this doctrine54 was warmly espoused55 by all the red haired young ladies, and desperate spinsters. The anti-bonnets, headed by the singing master, supported by the aforementioned bucks, and all the most buxom56 of the village girls, unable to withstand the cogent57 arguments of their adversaries58, dispatched a delegation59 to secure upon their side, the influence of the parson. The good man stood aghast! What could he do? To commit himself upon either side, would be his ruin: to stand neutral, was impossible. Mr. Soporific Heth—the village tailor—a most vigorous performer upon a cracked clarionet, was chosen ambassador. Mr. Heth was a lean, long sided piece of anatomy60, with an elongated61 phiz, nose like a fish hook, and lips blown to a point by his constant musical exertions62. In order to add dignity to the delegation, Mr. Wonderful Gruff—whose magic powers wooed harmony from an antiquated63 base viol—accompanied Mr. Heth. Mr. Gruff was the wisest man in Droneville. To be sure, he never spoke64 a word to reveal his wisdom, but then he looked tremendous wise, and a nod or a grunt65 from Mr. Gruff, had more influence in the village councils, than a speech of an hour’s length from most men. Mr. Gruff was a perfect personification of conceited66 obstinacy67. His short stubborn neck and mulish character, evinced a perfect harmony of parts, and unity68 of design. Such were the animals which presented themselves in the parson’s study. Mr. Heth, of course, was the orator69—and such a one! He was none of your concise70 speakers, who tell all they have to say in the fewest words possible, but an eloquent71, long-winded orator, able to talk a vast while without saying any thing. Mr. Heth was very fond of onions—the parson, however, had rather an aversion to these delicacies72. Mr. Heth was, moreover, afflicted73 with deafness, and for the double purpose of increasing the effect of his own masterly powers, and hearing his auditor’s replies, he drew a chair near his victim, and for about half an hour, blew an irresistible74 torrent75 of eloquence76 into the parson’s nose. Unable to resist such honied words, accompanied by a voice which rivaled the most cracked notes of Mr. Heth’s own clarionet, and seconded by the momentous77 nods and grunts78 of Mr. Gruff, the parson declared himself a convert to the principles of the anti-bonnets. This was the signal of triumph to their party—their opponents were crushed, and the bonnets were banished79 from the choir. After several weeks spent29 in preparation, the eventful Sabbath finally arrived, when the élite of Droneville maidens80, were to appear in ‘unbonneted’ beauty. Never had there been such an excitement in Droneville. The choir, and their appearance, were discussed in all places. It was regularly “served up,” at every tea table in the village. “What are Droneville people coming to,” exclaimed the old ladies; “things are changed since we were lads,” responded the veterans. “If I hadn’t any more hair than Polly Snipe, you wouldn’t catch me singing with my bonnet49 off,” said Miss Catnip. The day arrived; it was a cool bracing81 morning in January; but never, “within the memory of the oldest inhabitants,” had Droneville church been so crowded. While the parson was imploring82 God’s blessing83, the bucks were ogling84 and whispering, the singers were turning over the leaves of their books, an occasional note escaped from the nose of Mr. Long Metre, Mr. Gruff was tuning85 his base viol, Mr. Heth was caulking86 his clarionet. The hymn87 is at length “given out,”—all eyes are turned to the gallery,—every mouth is opened in wondering expectation,—the blind wipe their spectacles, the deaf seize their trumpets88, the eyes of the young bucks flashed with pleasure, those of the spinsters looked “unutterable things.” The choir arise, and while they stand like impatient coursers, with parted lips, awaiting the signal from Mr. Long Metre, let me attempt to describe the vision of paradise which burst upon my enraptured89 sight. It was a scene worthy90 the graphic91 pencil of Hogarth. There stood the assembled beauty of Droneville, with cheeks and noses kindled into a glow by the fresh air of a January morning. The gallery rose, seat over seat, presenting to the beholder92 an inclined plane of all that is beautiful in a red and blue phiz, studded with love-darting eyes, and party-colored heads, which might rival the coat of the patriarch. There they stand—long hinnies and short hinnies, sylph-like hinnies and porpoise-like hinnies, in regular confusion, with pates93 arrayed in every variety of fantastical gear ever invented by womankind. Some were adorned94 with flowers, others with feathers; some, having strained their hair so tight from their foreheads that they could not wink, had twisted it into a pig’s-tail upon the top of their craniums; a few, of more classic taste, had parted their locks from their brows, a la Madonna; others suffered them to float in unbraided beauty, a la witch of Endor; and one roguish little urchin95 was evidently arrayed in her grandmother’s cap. Thus they stand—the “pitch” is given, and away burst Droneville choir with impetuous fury—the power of every voice and every instrument is strained to its utmost capacity—Mr. Long Metre managed to scream the loudest—Mr. Soporific Heth blew his clarionet into several pieces—Mr. Gruff sawed his base viol ‘in two.’
Such was the performance of Droneville choir.—The combined power of all that is thrilling in beauty and melody, inflicted96 a wound upon my sentimental97 heart from which it has not yet recovered.
点击
收听单词发音
收听单词发音 |
1
ushered
|
|
| v.引，领，陪同( usher的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
2
mingled
|
|
| 混合，混入( mingle的过去式和过去分词 )； 混进，与…交往[联系] | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
3
mere
|
|
| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
4
miserable
|
|
| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
5
rustic
|
|
| adj.乡村的，有乡村特色的；n.乡下人，乡巴佬 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
6
calamities
|
|
| n.灾祸，灾难( calamity的名词复数 )；不幸之事 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
7
peculiarities
|
|
| n. 特质, 特性, 怪癖, 古怪 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
8
situated
|
|
| adj.坐落在...的，处于某种境地的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
9
wink
|
|
| n.眨眼，使眼色，瞬间；v.眨眼，使眼色，闪烁 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
10
scruple
|
|
| n./v.顾忌，迟疑 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
11
legitimate
|
|
| adj.合法的，合理的，合乎逻辑的；v.使合法 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
12
streaked
|
|
| adj.有条斑纹的，不安的v.快速移动( streak的过去式和过去分词 )；使布满条纹 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
13
refinements
|
|
| n.（生活）风雅；精炼( refinement的名词复数 )；改良品；细微的改良；优雅或高贵的动作 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
14
maze
|
|
| n.迷宫，八阵图，混乱，迷惑 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
15
sublimest
|
|
| 伟大的( sublime的最高级 )； 令人赞叹的； 极端的； 不顾后果的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
16
giggle
|
|
| n.痴笑，咯咯地笑；v.咯咯地笑着说 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
17
perfectly
|
|
| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
18
enquire
|
|
| v.打听，询问；调查，查问 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
19
invalid
|
|
| n.病人，伤残人；adj.有病的，伤残的；无效的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
20
convalescing
|
|
| v.康复( convalesce的现在分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
21
sneaking
|
|
| a.秘密的，不公开的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
22
dame
|
|
| n.女士 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
23
fracas
|
|
| n.打架；吵闹 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
24
tumult
|
|
| n.喧哗；激动，混乱；吵闹 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
25
chattering
|
|
| n. （机器振动发出的）咔嗒声，(鸟等)鸣，啁啾 adj. 喋喋不休的，啾啾声的 动词chatter的现在分词形式 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
26
incessantly
|
|
| ad.不停地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
27
acting
|
|
| n.演戏，行为，假装；adj.代理的，临时的，演出用的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
28
deliberately
|
|
| adv.审慎地；蓄意地；故意地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
29
converse
|
|
| vi.谈话，谈天，闲聊；adv.相反的，相反 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
30
ardent
|
|
| adj.热情的，热烈的，强烈的，烈性的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
31
phlegmatic
|
|
| adj.冷静的，冷淡的，冷漠的，无活力的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
32
yoked
|
|
| 结合（yoke的过去式形式） | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
33
exhorts
|
|
| n.劝勉者，告诫者，提倡者( exhort的名词复数 )v.劝告，劝说( exhort的第三人称单数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
34
frets
|
|
| 基质间片； 品丝（吉他等指板上定音的）( fret的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
35
tantalizing
|
|
| adj.逗人的；惹弄人的；撩人的；煽情的v.逗弄，引诱，折磨( tantalize的现在分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
36
savors
|
|
| v.意味，带有…的性质( savor的第三人称单数 )；给…加调味品；使有风味；品尝 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
37
exhortations
|
|
| n.敦促( exhortation的名词复数 )；极力推荐；（正式的）演讲；（宗教仪式中的）劝诫 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
38
benevolent
|
|
| adj.仁慈的，乐善好施的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
39
mule
|
|
| n.骡子，杂种，执拗的人 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
40
obstinate
|
|
| adj.顽固的，倔强的，不易屈服的，较难治愈的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
41
coaxing
|
|
| v.哄，用好话劝说( coax的现在分词 )；巧言骗取；哄劝，劝诱；“锻炼”效应 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
42
cuffs
|
|
| n.袖口( cuff的名词复数 )v.掌打，拳打( cuff的第三人称单数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
43
squeal
|
|
| v.发出长而尖的声音；n.长而尖的声音 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
44
choir
|
|
| n.唱诗班，唱诗班的席位，合唱团，舞蹈团；v.合唱 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
45
radical
|
|
| n.激进份子，原子团，根号；adj.根本的，激进的，彻底的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
46
broached
|
|
| v.谈起( broach的过去式和过去分词 )；打开并开始用；用凿子扩大（或修光）；（在桶上）钻孔取液体 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
47
melodiously
|
|
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
|
48
bonnets
|
|
| n.童帽( bonnet的名词复数 )；（烟囱等的）覆盖物；（苏格兰男子的）无边呢帽；（女子戴的）任何一种帽子 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
49
bonnet
|
|
| n.无边女帽；童帽 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
50
bucks
|
|
| n.雄鹿( buck的名词复数 )；钱；（英国十九世纪初的）花花公子；（用于某些表达方式）责任v.（马等）猛然弓背跃起( buck的第三人称单数 )；抵制；猛然震荡；马等尥起后蹄跳跃 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
51
equanimity
|
|
| n.沉着，镇定 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
52
touching
|
|
| adj.动人的，使人感伤的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
53
kindled
|
|
| （使某物）燃烧，着火( kindle的过去式和过去分词 )； 激起（感情等）； 发亮，放光 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
54
doctrine
|
|
| n.教义；主义；学说 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
55
espoused
|
|
| v.（决定）支持，拥护（目标、主张等）( espouse的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
56
buxom
|
|
| adj.（妇女）丰满的，有健康美的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
57
cogent
|
|
| adj.强有力的，有说服力的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
58
adversaries
|
|
| n.对手，敌手( adversary的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
59
delegation
|
|
| n.代表团；派遣 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
60
anatomy
|
|
| n.解剖学，解剖；功能，结构，组织 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
61
elongated
|
|
| v.延长，加长( elongate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
62
exertions
|
|
| n.努力( exertion的名词复数 )；费力；（能力、权力等的）运用；行使 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
63
antiquated
|
|
| adj.陈旧的，过时的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
64
spoke
|
|
| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
65
grunt
|
|
| v.嘟哝；作呼噜声；n.呼噜声，嘟哝 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
66
conceited
|
|
| adj.自负的，骄傲自满的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
67
obstinacy
|
|
| n.顽固；（病痛等）难治 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
68
unity
|
|
| n.团结，联合，统一；和睦，协调 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
69
orator
|
|
| n.演说者，演讲者，雄辩家 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
70
concise
|
|
| adj.简洁的，简明的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
71
eloquent
|
|
| adj.雄辩的，口才流利的；明白显示出的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
72
delicacies
|
|
| n.棘手( delicacy的名词复数 )；精致；精美的食物；周到 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
73
afflicted
|
|
| 使受痛苦，折磨( afflict的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
74
irresistible
|
|
| adj.非常诱人的，无法拒绝的，无法抗拒的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
75
torrent
|
|
| n.激流，洪流；爆发，(话语等的)连发 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
76
eloquence
|
|
| n.雄辩；口才，修辞 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
77
momentous
|
|
| adj.重要的，重大的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
78
grunts
|
|
| （猪等）作呼噜声( grunt的第三人称单数 )； （指人）发出类似的哼声； 咕哝着说； 石鲈 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
79
banished
|
|
| v.放逐，驱逐( banish的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
80
maidens
|
|
| 处女( maiden的名词复数 )； 少女； 未婚女子； （板球运动）未得分的一轮投球 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
81
bracing
|
|
| adj.令人振奋的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
82
imploring
|
|
| 恳求的，哀求的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
83
blessing
|
|
| n.祈神赐福；祷告；祝福，祝愿 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
84
ogling
|
|
| v.（向…）抛媚眼，送秋波( ogle的现在分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
85
tuning
|
|
| n.调谐，调整，调音v.调音( tune的现在分词 )；调整；（给收音机、电视等）调谐；使协调 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
86
caulking
|
|
| n.堵缝；敛缝；捻缝；压紧v.堵（船的）缝( caulk的现在分词 )；泥…的缝；填塞；使不漏水 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
87
hymn
|
|
| n.赞美诗，圣歌，颂歌 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
88
trumpets
|
|
| 喇叭( trumpet的名词复数 )； 小号； 喇叭形物； （尤指）绽开的水仙花 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
89
enraptured
|
|
| v.使狂喜( enrapture的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
90
worthy
|
|
| adj.(of)值得的，配得上的；有价值的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
91
graphic
|
|
| adj.生动的，形象的，绘画的，文字的，图表的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
92
beholder
|
|
| n.观看者，旁观者 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
93
pates
|
|
| n.头顶，（尤指）秃顶，光顶( pate的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
94
adorned
|
|
| [计]被修饰的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
95
urchin
|
|
| n.顽童；海胆 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
96
inflicted
|
|
| 把…强加给，使承受，遭受( inflict的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
97
sentimental
|
|
| adj.多愁善感的，感伤的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
| 欢迎访问英文小说网 |