"Five years is a long time," Kirk ventured.
"Ten."
Kirk stared at him in astonishment1. "You took the optional five years! Why in heaven would anyone—" He broke off suddenly. The question might be one Jerwyn would not care to answer. He threw him a speculative2 glance, wondering why he had been sent here and whether he, too, was bitter. Maybe a poor record, or something in his past he didn't care to go back to...? That didn't fit in his own case—but then there was no knowing what did fit in his own case. Jerwyn had an alert, perceptive3 look that indicated considerable intelligence, but still he somehow looked inadequate4. Some quality an Administrator5 should have was lacking ... dignity? drive?
Jerwyn's voice interrupted his thoughts. "Beautiful, isn't it?"
The groundcar had left the plain and was entering a heavily wooded section. For the first time, Kirk took a good look at his surroundings. Some of the trees and plants were very like those he had seen in parks at home. Still, there was a definitely alien feel to it all. The trees were low and wide and had peculiar6 contours, different from those of trees on Terra, and their flowering foliage7 came in odd sizes and colors. The sky wasn't quite the blue he was used to, and the shapes of the clouds were different. He noticed for the first time a heady, pungent8 perfume carried on the breeze, that was both pleasant and stimulating9. It came, perhaps, from the wide-petaled flowers in oddly shimmering10 colors that clustered thickly everywhere.
"Yes, it's beautiful," he agreed, "but—" The feeling of despair and frustration11 welled up in him again. The warmth he sensed in Jerwyn made him suddenly long to blurt12 out the whole story. He controlled himself with difficulty, as he turned toward him. "It's pretty enough. It might make a good vacation resort if it weren't on the edge of nowhere." His pent-up emotion exploded as he spoke13. "But five years in this hole! I'd feel a hell of a lot better if I were looking at some rocky, barren landscape with some mines on it—with something of value on it—with a name somebody'd heard of, where you could hope to get somewhere. I don't want to waste five years here!" He paused for breath, staring angrily at the lush landscape. "And for that matter, life on one of those planets where you live under domes14, with a sealed-in atmosphere, is probably a lot more civilized15 and convenient than in this primitive16 jungle."
Jerwyn nodded slowly, an unspoken compassion17 in his face. "I know how you're feeling." He paused. "And it does seem pretty primitive here at first—no automatic precipitrons for cleaning your clothes, natural foods instead of synthetics18, no aircars, no automatic dispensers for food or drinks or clothes; none of a hundred things you take for granted till you don't have them. But you get used to it. There are things to make up—" He broke off as the car began to descend19 into a valley. "Look!" His voice held an odd tone of affection. "There's your new home."
Kirk gazed downward at the settlement nested in the valley below them. He fished in his pocket for a magnascope to bring the view nearer and stared curiously20, as the lens adjusted to the distance. He picked out groups of buildings, low units of some coarse, natural material, widely spaced. This was the largest city on the planet, he knew, but it seemed to be little more than a village. It was undoubtedly21 primitive—very primitive. Remembering the magnificent high buildings of Terra, he was filled with sudden homesickness for the speeding sidewalks crowded with people, the skylanes humming with aircars.
Turning the magnascope here and there, he kept his gaze trained on the town beneath him, studying it now in more detail. Slowly, some of his depression began to leave him, and he felt a strange sense of warmth begin to take its place. He stepped up the power of the glass till he could see the inhabitants walking in the streets. Like the natives who had met him at the landing ship, they walked with a beautiful, easy grace, a sumptuous22 ease that seemed somehow almost a rebuke23 of his own stiffly correct military posture24. They gave an impression of combined leisure and vitality25.
Gradually, as he watched, an odd feeling of nostalgia26 began to stir in him, an old, childish longing27. He remembered suddenly a dream he had had years ago, in which he had run laughing through green meadows with a lovely girl. He had fought against waking from it and returning to his desk piled high with books and his ascetically28 furnished room.
He blinked his eyes and put down the magnascope. "Rather attractive, in a way," he said grudgingly29 to Jerwyn. He settled back slowly into his seat.
"Just the same," he added, annoyed at himself for his sentimental30 lapse31, "how have you managed to stand it all this time? I still can't figure how I came to get it in the neck like this." Abruptly32, he plunged33 into the words he had been holding back, telling the whole story of his confusion to Jerwyn.
He rationalized to himself that perhaps Jerwyn could help him solve the mystery. At least he might tell him how he himself came to be sent to Nemar, without his having to ask directly; and this might give him a clue.
"I've been over the whole business a million times, trying to figure it out," he concluded. "Somebody with pull must have had it in for me. But who? And why? I never had any real run-ins with Ross. In fact, I'd always thought he liked me." He scowled34. "Of course, he gives practically everybody that impression. Maybe he's just a professional glad-hander, though he certainly doesn't seem like it." He shook his head. "Maybe that's the secret of his success; I never could figure out how he got where he is. He certainly doesn't seem typical of the command. Oh, he's brilliant enough, but there's a quality about him I'd almost call—weak, I guess. Unsuitable for his post, anyway. He treats the janitor35 the same as—"
Kirk stopped abruptly. He suddenly had the answer to the question that had been nagging36 at the edge of his mind: it was Ross that Jerwyn reminded him of.
Trying to cover up his confusion, he went on rapidly, hoping Jerwyn would not notice. "Anyway, whatever his reasons were, he's played me a dirty trick, and if there's ever any way I can pay him back for it, I'll do it. I'll have five years to think about it. Me! The fair-haired boy of the Institute! On my way to the top!" His face flushed with resentment37. "Sent to sweat out five years in this Godforsaken place with a bunch of savages38 hardly evolved out of the jungle!" He passed his hand over his forehead, wiping off sweat, feeling the full force of his pent-up anguish39 and rage flood through him.
Jerwyn spoke very quickly. "I felt pretty much the same way when I was sent here. But I feel differently now. I could try to explain. But I don't think it's a good idea. I don't think anyone could have explained to me. This is a place you've got to live in; you can't be told about it." He shifted in his seat as a small group of buildings came into view. "As for Ross—well, he was responsible for my being sent here, too, and I spent some time when I first came, thinking of ways to cut his body in little pieces and throw them in a garbage pulverizer—but I wouldn't waste my time if I were you. I know now he had his reasons." As he spoke the car pulled to a stop. "Well, here we are. This is where you'll be living and working."
Jerwyn stayed with Kirk while he was shown through various buildings. He found most of the office buildings full of bright murals and little watered patios40, but lacking the simplest devices for working efficiency. He was introduced to various officials, Terran and Nemarian. Some of the latter, to his surprise, were women—a rare phenomenon for a primitive planet, he remembered from his classes.
By the time the touring was over and he had said goodbye to Jerwyn, he was too tired to do more than glance briefly41 at the quarters to which he was shown. Left alone in his rooms, he took a quick, awkward bath, too weary to feel more than a brief annoyance42 at the lack of automatic buttons for temperature controls, soaping, and drying, and fell exhausted43 on the low bed.
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1
astonishment
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| n.惊奇，惊异 | |
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speculative
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| adj.思索性的，暝想性的，推理的 | |
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perceptive
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| adj.知觉的，有洞察力的，感知的 | |
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inadequate
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| adj.(for,to)不充足的，不适当的 | |
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administrator
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| n.经营管理者，行政官员 | |
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peculiar
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| adj.古怪的，异常的；特殊的，特有的 | |
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foliage
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| n.叶子，树叶，簇叶 | |
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pungent
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| adj.（气味、味道）刺激性的，辛辣的；尖锐的 | |
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stimulating
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| adj.有启发性的，能激发人思考的 | |
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shimmering
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| v.闪闪发光，发微光( shimmer的现在分词 ) | |
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frustration
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| n.挫折，失败，失效，落空 | |
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blurt
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| vt.突然说出，脱口说出 | |
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spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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14
domes
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| n.圆屋顶( dome的名词复数 )；像圆屋顶一样的东西；圆顶体育场 | |
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15
civilized
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| a.有教养的，文雅的 | |
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primitive
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| adj.原始的；简单的；n.原(始)人，原始事物 | |
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compassion
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| n.同情，怜悯 | |
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synthetics
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| n.化学合成物 | |
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descend
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| vt./vi.传下来，下来，下降 | |
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curiously
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| adv.有求知欲地；好问地；奇特地 | |
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undoubtedly
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| adv.确实地，无疑地 | |
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sumptuous
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| adj.豪华的，奢侈的，华丽的 | |
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rebuke
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| v.指责，非难，斥责 [反]praise | |
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posture
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| n.姿势，姿态，心态，态度；v.作出某种姿势 | |
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vitality
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| n.活力，生命力，效力 | |
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nostalgia
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| n.怀乡病，留恋过去，怀旧 | |
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longing
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| n.（for）渴望 | |
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ascetically
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| 苦行地 | |
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grudgingly
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sentimental
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| adj.多愁善感的，感伤的 | |
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31
lapse
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| n.过失，流逝，失效，抛弃信仰，间隔；vi.堕落，停止，失效，流逝；vt.使失效 | |
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abruptly
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| adv.突然地，出其不意地 | |
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plunged
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| v.颠簸( plunge的过去式和过去分词 )；暴跌；骤降；突降 | |
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scowled
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| 怒视，生气地皱眉( scowl的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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janitor
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| n.看门人，管门人 | |
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nagging
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| adj.唠叨的，挑剔的；使人不得安宁的v.不断地挑剔或批评（某人）( nag的现在分词 )；不断地烦扰或伤害（某人）；无休止地抱怨；不断指责 | |
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resentment
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| n.怨愤，忿恨 | |
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38
savages
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| 未开化的人，野蛮人( savage的名词复数 ) | |
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39
anguish
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| n.(尤指心灵上的)极度痛苦，烦恼 | |
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patios
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| n.露台，平台( patio的名词复数 ) | |
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41
briefly
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| adv.简单地，简短地 | |
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42
annoyance
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| n.恼怒，生气，烦恼 | |
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43
exhausted
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| adj.极其疲惫的，精疲力尽的 | |
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