If this was silly, it at least was in better taste than characterized the proceeding17 of the Princess of the Asturias, at381 Madrid, when Saint-Simon took ceremonious leave of her before he returned to France, in 1722. In full court, and to all his formal compliments and speeches, her Royal Highness only replied by a loud rattling18 noise in the trachea, which she repeated as he concluded each of his addresses to her. The poor Duke was stupefied, but the court was in fits of laughter, and hilariously19 admired the jest.
The great Condé furnishes us with another example of this class of fools. A village schoolmaster once came to him with an address. As the speaker bowed low, on commencing his speech, Condé, quick as thought, vaulted20 over his back. With equal rapidity, the orator21 turned and continued his speech, but Condé’s folly22 was uppermost, and laying a light hand upon the pedagogue’s shoulder, over he bounded again, lightly as an equestrian23 in a “daring act” of the harmless arena24. The baffled speaker then gave up the attempt, and left the princely fool to the enjoyment25 of the recollection of his folly.
The father of the last Duke of Mantua, Charles III., was another of those illustrious personages who preferred being his own fool, and after a singular fashion too. He loved to go abroad in the dirtiest of disguises, and accompanied by an escort of equally ill clad bullies26 for his defence. It was his sport to assail27 all he met in the coarsest terms, and when some persons thus assaulted, more impatient than others, fell upon him in return, with tongue or cudgel, he would laugh till he was sore, and then his escort came to the rescue. On other occasions, he would enter the shops of vendors28 of very breakable materials, and taking up mirrors or drinking glass, or any other fragile matter that came to hand, he would let it fall to the ground, and find double provocation29 to laughter in the ruin he had committed and in the expressions of unrestrained abuse which were showered on him in consequence.
Something of madness must have lurked30 under this;382 but in the next buffoon31 we shall only see a development of natural disposition.
The dexterity32 of a quack33 doctor at a fair made of Peter the Great his own fool, when the humour took him to play the character. The Czar had seen the fellow, on a platform, skilfully34 pushing out teeth with the end of a ladle, or picking them out with the point of a dagger35. Peter paid for instruction in the art, and forthwith began to practise it on his courtiers, whose teeth were never safe within their lips. It happened on one occasion that a Russian officer had exposed himself to the Czar’s wrath36, by being absent from a post at which Peter had especially placed him. It was necessary that the offender37 should meet his enraged38 sovereign, and his friends gave him up for lost, when he entered the audience chamber. But the officer, as he crossed the threshold, pulled out his handkerchief, pressed it to his cheek, and advanced towards the Czar with a growl41 of agony. Peter, delighted at the prospect42 of a patient, pushed him into a chair; the officer opened wide his jaws43, and the Czar tugged44 at his gums with a fury that made the sufferer roar as if he had been under the knout, but which was attended by the extraction of two useful and stupendous grinders. Peter looked at the teeth, and then at his patient, whose lips were still open with pain and discoloured by blood. The Imperial surgeon laughed and danced with delight; but looking in the face of the officer, his own darkened with rage, on recognizing the offender. The latter, shuddering45 at the look, sank back in his chair and opened his jaws wider, indicative of another offering from the same source. What could the amateur dentist do? He laughed louder, danced more wildly with ecstasy46, pulled out another tooth, and dismissed the crafty47 but clever patient, with full pardon.
The Czarina Elizabeth, in a milder form it is true, suffered also under this malady48 of folly. This lady’s delight was, never to sign any document brought to her by her383 ministers, till she had worn them out by her refusals. When the Grand Chancellor49 Besterfchef laid before her a paper which required her name at the bottom of it in order to give it validity, she would toss the pen across the room, begin dancing round the minister, who turned upon his knees to meet her face and to implore50 her, with tears in his eyes, to cease from such folly. The Czarina only danced on, laughing the more immoderately as she observed the embarrassment51 and the tears of the Chancellor. The latter however seldom left her till he had made her ashamed of playing the fool, and of interrupting public business by refusing to scrawl52 her name to a state paper.
At a semi-barbarous court like that of Russia, the above traits are not very surprising. At that of Spain, which boasted so loudly of its solemn grandeur53, dignity, and refinement54, we find a more surprising instance, but quite different from that I have mentioned of the Princess of the Asturias.
The Spanish royal family of the last century affords us an instance of the Heir to the Throne not only being his own fool, but of his raising his friends to the dignity of folly, by conferring on them its insignia. Lord Ligonier, the husband of one of Alfieri’s worthless idols55, was English Ambassador at the court of Madrid during a portion of the reign40 of Charles III., which lasted from 1759 to 1788. After Lord Ligonier’s introduction to the King, he was conducted to the apartments of the Heir to the Crown, the Prince of the Asturias. The latter was, subsequently, that Charles IV. who was his own Queen’s especial fool throughout the term of their married lives. As Lord Ligonier approached the Prince’s chamber, he saw issuing therefrom a number of grandees56, each wearing, with proud gravity, a fantastic fool’s cap. On inquiring the meaning of such a pageant57, he was informed that his Royal Highness possessed58 the fancy of distinguishing his most cherished friends as his “fools.”384 The Prince, too, was often pleased to confer this mark of his favour on celebrated59 foreigners. Lord Ligonier was alarmed.
“I represent,” he said, “a great sovereign; and am myself a foreigner not altogether unknown. I must add, that my gracious master would be seriously offended, if the Prince of the Asturias were to think proper to cover the representative of the King of England with this decoration. You had better go in, Sir,” said he to his introducer, “and say as much to his Royal Highness.”
The reluctant official undertook the mission; but he presently returned, with the intimation that the Prince could not give up an old-established custom. Upon which, Lord Ligonier turned on his heel, declaring that he would not visit a Prince who thus exposed an Ambassador to insult. The court officials were thrown into a state of amusing terror by this declaration; they maintained, that if the Ambassador retired60, it would be a flagrant insult on the Prince. Ultimately, and after many messages and countermessages had passed between the Prince in his room, and the English Envoy62 in the antechamber, announcement was made that the Prince of the Asturias would not attempt to clap the fool’s-cap on the head of Lord Ligonier. His lordship consequently entered the apartment, but not without being more than usually vigilant63 against surprise. He found the sage61 Prince with his back to the hearth64, and with his hands behind him. The Prince remained in that position, and invited the Ambassador to approach. The English lord obeyed; but as he advanced, he perceived that the Prince held a paper object, and the Ambassador stopped short to converse65 with his Royal Highness at a very respectful distance. At the conclusion of the interview, he had to bow low; but, as a sailor might say, his weather eye was open, and he watched the Prince narrowly. The latter was resolved upon effecting his object, and as narrowly watched the Ambassador. The385 bow was almost at its lowest, when the Prince, seizing the most favourable66 opportunity, suddenly brought the fool’s cap from behind him, and endeavoured to fix it on the head of Lord Ligonier; but the old soldier who, by one glorious action at Laffeldt, had disconcerted all the projects of Marshal Saxe, was not to be foiled by a foolish prince. As soon as his eye caught sight of the cap, his hand was upon it, and almost as soon it lay crumpled67 up beneath his feet. His sudden action nearly threw the Prince out of his equilibrium68; and leaving that illustrious fool’s-cap maker69 to recover himself as he best might, the old warrior70 quitted the apartment with a smile of scorn upon his lip.
Turning now from the Envoy from, to the King of, England, I may observe that the greatest opportunity for court fools to exhibit their wit or slyness, occurred when great political events were passing before them. They were then the merry scholiasts of living history. At no period in England, since the foundation of the monarchy72, could a professional fool have found more incentives73 to fun or satire74, than during the eventful reign of George III. And of all that reign, the time of “the Coalition75,” in 1783, was that on which a witty76 court fool, in the secret of what was passing and what was about to pass, would have had most to say, hint, or laugh at. The Shelburne Administration had gone to pieces, and that fatal “Coalition” had been forced on George III., who indignantly saw himself compelled to accept a union of men who had for years been denouncing each other as void of principle, and worthy77 of the hangman. Lord North and Charles Fox, antipodes in everything but wit and good temper, came together, with other bitter foes78, who had salved over their old sores, but wounded their reputation, for ever. When the new ministers first appeared at court before that good and obstinate79 old sovereign whom they and other ministers helped or harassed80 into madness, George III. had made up his mind386 to rid himself of them at the very earliest opportunity. Had there been a court fool present who knew the royal intention, he would have revelled81 in jokes, gibes82, and inuendoes. As it was, the King was his own fool, and could not avoid showing a sign of his resolve. How he did it, is whimsically and authentically83 told in the second volume, page 28, of Russell’s Memoirs84 of Fox. Lord Holland is speaking, and in these words:—“I cannot help relating a saying of that lively and humorous old man” (the Marquis of Townshend) “on this occasion. He said he had always foreseen the Coalition Ministry85 could not last, for he was at court when Mr. Fox kissed hands; and he observed George III. turn back his ears and eyes just like the horse at Astley’s, when the tailor he had determined86 to throw was getting on him.” This was the very action of a court fool, and not one of the fraternity could have performed it more felicitously87 than the King, who, on this occasion, was his own.
The eldest88 son of George III. had his comic aspect too, and was an excellent mimic89. If we may believe the very respectable authority of Mr. Raikes, whose journals show him to have been a visitor at the Pavilion, and the intimate friend of many who visited there more frequently than himself, George IV., in playing the fool, was not at all scrupulous90 as to sacrificing his own ministers, for the sake of effect. Indeed, they were very good objects for the ridicule91 of a monarch71 who was his own jester. The “best wigged92 Prince in Christendom” had in perfection one of the chief qualities of the professional fool,—the power of imitation. Mr. Raikes affords an illustration of this in a story told him by the Duke of Wellington. “When the King sent for me,” said the Duke, “to form a new administration, in 1828, he was then seriously ill, though he would never allow it. I found him in bed, dressed in a dirty silk jacket and a turban night-cap, one as greasy93 as the other;387 for, notwithstanding his coquetry about dress in public, he was extremely slovenly94 and dirty in private. The first words he said to me were, ‘Arthur, the Cabinet is defunct;’ and then he began to describe the manner in which the late ministers had taken leave of him, in giving in their resignations. This was accompanied by the most ludicrous mimicry95 of the voice and manner of each individual, so strikingly like, that it was quite impossible to refrain from fits of laughter.”
If George IV. was strong in the fool’s quality of mimicry, Louis Philippe was not less so in coarser mockery; but then the latter King was too grave an actor to allow of his playing the fool in presence even of a friend or minister. He, however, could indulge in a brief private performance of the character, and he was once unwittingly caught in the fact by one of his private secretaries, who had concealed96 himself behind a door, in order to escape the observation of the King. His Majesty97 was approaching in deep conversation with the old republican, Dupont de l’Eure. The monarch at the head of “the best of republics,” treated the aged39 confederate, of whom he wished to be well rid, with an excess of warmth and courtesy. Louis Philippe professed98 ideas liberal enough to gratify a republican so advanced as M. Dupont, of whom he finally took leave in the most condescending99 and friendly manner. “No sooner, however,” says Mr. Raikes, who was the confidant of the secretary, “had the other turned his back to go out, and before he quitted the room, than Louis Philippe began to hold up his finger at him, with a face of mockery, and made a movement with his foot, as if he could hardly prevent himself from kicking him.” This bit of pantomimic incivility was often the manner of the most comic of court fools, and probably Triboulet himself could not have enacted it in superior style.
But I must draw my instances to a close, and perhaps I388 cannot do so more appropriately than by showing the merits, as a jester, of a sovereign whose country has since been the scene where martyrs100 have died, and heroes have avenged101 them. I refer to Oude, and I will add, that perhaps few monarchs102 ever so perfectly103 played the fool for his own satisfaction and that of his court, as Nassir-u-Deen, the late King of that country. His great delight was in puppet-shows, and it was on the occasion of one being exhibited before him that the following occurrence took place, as recorded in the ‘Private Life of an Eastern King.’
“His Majesty laughed heartily104 at the performances of the little burlesques105 of men and women.... At length he gave a whispered order to his barber,” (who, it may be mentioned, began life as a hair-dresser in London, and rose to the combined offices of barber and prime-minister to a King,) “who went out, brought something in his hand, and gave it to the King. The royal chair was pushed back, and his Majesty condescended106 to advance to the front of the puppet-show, going round the table, as if to inspect it more closely. The owners exerted themselves to give still more satisfaction, regarding their fortunes as made. The King watched for a little; his hand was advanced suddenly, and as suddenly drawn107 back, and one of the innocent marionettes fell motionless upon the stage. It was very plain that his Majesty had a pair of scissors in his hand, and had cut the string. The performers must have been as well aware of this as we were, but they gazed in affected108, wonder at the catastrophe109.... The King turned round, his face beaming with fun, and looked at us knowingly, as much as to say, ‘Did I not do that well?’ The barber laughed loudly in reply, and other courtiers joined in the chorus. But this was not the whole of the royal wit. The hand was pushed forward and drawn back again and again, and again and again did one after another of the puppets fall dead and immovable upon the stage, every successive fall eliciting110 a shout389 of laughter from the table and a blank look of astonishment111 from the general manager of the show, who was visible directing and superintending. When nearly all had fallen, the royal wit was satisfied, returned to his chair, ordered a handsome present to be given to the owner of the show, and it was withdrawn112.”
With this court jest, I too will withdraw, leaving my puppets to be dealt with according as my readers may have found them more or less awkwardly handled by their showman. If the latter has amused or instructed the public audience, whose generous indulgence he has so often had to gratefully acknowledge, his aim has been accomplished113. He has not pretended to instruct, but has simply brought together materials for instructors114, and for constructors of future histories of a class which, in some shape or other, has existed from the legendary115 days of Momus down to those of contemporary Christian116 patriarchs in Asia, of whose households the buffoon is still sometimes a member. To effect this, demanded only a little industry;—small merit in a country where industry is the recognized duty of every citizen, and the only merit claimed by the author of these essays towards the History of Court and Household Fools.
THE END.
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1
touching
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| adj.动人的，使人感伤的 | |
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exalted
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| adj.(地位等)高的，崇高的；尊贵的，高尚的 | |
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disposition
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| n.性情，性格；意向，倾向；排列，部署 | |
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persevering
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| a.坚忍不拔的 | |
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enacted
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| 制定（法律），通过（法案）( enact的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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inflicting
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| 把…强加给，使承受，遭受( inflict的现在分词 ) | |
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detrimental
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| adj.损害的，造成伤害的 | |
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follies
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| 罪恶，时事讽刺剧； 愚蠢，蠢笨，愚蠢的行为、思想或做法( folly的名词复数 ) | |
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remarkable
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| adj.显著的，异常的，非凡的，值得注意的 | |
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chamber
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| n.房间，寝室；会议厅；议院；会所 | |
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fixed
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| adj.固定的，不变的，准备好的；(计算机)固定的 | |
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mighty
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| adj.强有力的；巨大的 | |
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behold
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| v.看，注视，看到 | |
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conjuror
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| n.魔术师，变戏法者 | |
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dominions
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| 统治权( dominion的名词复数 )； 领土； 疆土； 版图 | |
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dexterous
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| adj.灵敏的；灵巧的 | |
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proceeding
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| n.行动，进行，(pl.)会议录，学报 | |
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rattling
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| adj. 格格作响的, 活泼的, 很好的 adv. 极其, 很, 非常 动词rattle的现在分词 | |
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hilariously
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vaulted
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| adj.拱状的 | |
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orator
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| n.演说者，演讲者，雄辩家 | |
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folly
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| n.愚笨，愚蠢，蠢事，蠢行，傻话 | |
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equestrian
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| adj.骑马的；n.马术 | |
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arena
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| n.竞技场，运动场所；竞争场所，舞台 | |
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enjoyment
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| n.乐趣；享有；享用 | |
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bullies
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| n.欺凌弱小者, 开球 vt.恐吓, 威胁, 欺负 | |
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assail
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| v.猛烈攻击，抨击，痛斥 | |
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vendors
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| n.摊贩( vendor的名词复数 )；小贩；（房屋等的）卖主；卖方 | |
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provocation
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| n.激怒，刺激，挑拨，挑衅的事物，激怒的原因 | |
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lurked
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| vi.潜伏，埋伏（lurk的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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buffoon
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| n.演出时的丑角 | |
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dexterity
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| n.(手的)灵巧，灵活 | |
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quack
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| n.庸医；江湖医生；冒充内行的人；骗子 | |
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skilfully
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| adv. (美skillfully)熟练地 | |
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dagger
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| n.匕首，短剑，剑号 | |
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wrath
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| n.愤怒，愤慨，暴怒 | |
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offender
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| n.冒犯者，违反者，犯罪者 | |
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enraged
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| 使暴怒( enrage的过去式和过去分词 )； 歜； 激愤 | |
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aged
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| adj.年老的，陈年的 | |
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reign
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| n.统治时期，统治，支配，盛行；v.占优势 | |
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growl
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| v.（狗等）嗥叫，（炮等）轰鸣；n.嗥叫，轰鸣 | |
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prospect
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| n.前景，前途；景色，视野 | |
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jaws
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| n.口部；嘴 | |
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tugged
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| v.用力拉，使劲拉，猛扯( tug的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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shuddering
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| v.战栗( shudder的现在分词 )；发抖；（机器、车辆等）突然震动；颤动 | |
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ecstasy
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| n.狂喜，心醉神怡，入迷 | |
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crafty
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| adj.狡猾的，诡诈的 | |
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malady
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| n.病，疾病(通常做比喻) | |
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chancellor
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| n.(英)大臣；法官；(德、奥)总理；大学校长 | |
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implore
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| vt.乞求，恳求，哀求 | |
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embarrassment
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| n.尴尬；使人为难的人(事物)；障碍；窘迫 | |
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scrawl
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| vt.潦草地书写；n.潦草的笔记，涂写 | |
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grandeur
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| n.伟大，崇高，宏伟，庄严，豪华 | |
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refinement
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| n.文雅；高尚；精美；精制；精炼 | |
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idols
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| 偶像( idol的名词复数 )； 受崇拜的人或物； 受到热爱和崇拜的人或物； 神像 | |
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grandees
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| n.贵族，大公，显贵者( grandee的名词复数 ) | |
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pageant
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| n.壮观的游行；露天历史剧 | |
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possessed
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| adj.疯狂的；拥有的，占有的 | |
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celebrated
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| adj.有名的，声誉卓著的 | |
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retired
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| adj.隐退的，退休的，退役的 | |
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sage
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| n.圣人，哲人；adj.贤明的，明智的 | |
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envoy
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| n.使节，使者，代表，公使 | |
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vigilant
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| adj.警觉的，警戒的，警惕的 | |
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hearth
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| n.壁炉炉床，壁炉地面 | |
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converse
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| vi.谈话，谈天，闲聊；adv.相反的，相反 | |
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favourable
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| adj.赞成的，称赞的，有利的，良好的，顺利的 | |
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crumpled
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| adj. 弯扭的, 变皱的 动词crumple的过去式和过去分词形式 | |
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equilibrium
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| n.平衡，均衡，相称，均势，平静 | |
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maker
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| n.制造者，制造商 | |
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warrior
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| n.勇士，武士，斗士 | |
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monarch
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| n.帝王，君主，最高统治者 | |
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monarchy
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| n.君主，最高统治者；君主政体，君主国 | |
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incentives
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| 激励某人做某事的事物( incentive的名词复数 )； 刺激； 诱因； 动机 | |
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satire
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| n.讽刺，讽刺文学，讽刺作品 | |
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coalition
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| n.结合体，同盟，结合，联合 | |
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witty
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| adj.机智的，风趣的 | |
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worthy
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| adj.(of)值得的，配得上的；有价值的 | |
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foes
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| 敌人，仇敌( foe的名词复数 ) | |
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obstinate
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| adj.顽固的，倔强的，不易屈服的，较难治愈的 | |
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harassed
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| adj. 疲倦的，厌烦的 动词harass的过去式和过去分词 | |
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revelled
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| v.作乐( revel的过去式和过去分词 )；狂欢；着迷；陶醉 | |
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gibes
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| vi.嘲笑，嘲弄（gibe的第三人称单数形式） | |
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authentically
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| ad.sincerely真诚地 | |
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memoirs
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| n.回忆录；回忆录传( mem,自oir的名词复数) | |
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ministry
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| n.(政府的)部；牧师 | |
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determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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felicitously
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| adv.恰当地，适切地 | |
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eldest
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| adj.最年长的，最年老的 | |
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mimic
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| v.模仿，戏弄；n.模仿他人言行的人 | |
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scrupulous
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| adj.审慎的，小心翼翼的，完全的，纯粹的 | |
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ridicule
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| v.讥讽，挖苦；n.嘲弄 | |
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wigged
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| adj.戴假发的 | |
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greasy
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| adj. 多脂的，油脂的 | |
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slovenly
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| adj.懒散的，不整齐的，邋遢的 | |
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mimicry
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| n.（生物）拟态，模仿 | |
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concealed
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| a.隐藏的，隐蔽的 | |
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majesty
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| n.雄伟，壮丽，庄严，威严；最高权威，王权 | |
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professed
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| 公开声称的，伪称的，已立誓信教的 | |
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condescending
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| adj.谦逊的,故意屈尊的 | |
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martyrs
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| n.martyr的复数形式；烈士( martyr的名词复数 )；殉道者；殉教者；乞怜者（向人诉苦以博取同情） | |
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avenged
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| v.为…复仇，报…之仇( avenge的过去式和过去分词 )；为…报复 | |
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monarchs
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| 君主，帝王( monarch的名词复数 ) | |
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perfectly
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| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
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heartily
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| adv.衷心地，诚恳地，十分，很 | |
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burlesques
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| n.滑稽模仿( burlesque的名词复数 )；（包括脱衣舞的）滑稽歌舞杂剧v.（嘲弄地）模仿，（通过模仿）取笑( burlesque的第三人称单数 ) | |
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condescended
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| 屈尊，俯就( condescend的过去式和过去分词 )； 故意表示和蔼可亲 | |
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drawn
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| v.拖，拉，拔出；adj.憔悴的，紧张的 | |
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affected
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| adj.不自然的，假装的 | |
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catastrophe
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| n.大灾难，大祸 | |
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eliciting
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| n. 诱发, 引出 动词elicit的现在分词形式 | |
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astonishment
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| n.惊奇，惊异 | |
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112
withdrawn
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| vt.收回；使退出；vi.撤退，退出 | |
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113
accomplished
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| adj.有才艺的；有造诣的；达到了的 | |
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114
instructors
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| 指导者，教师( instructor的名词复数 ) | |
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115
legendary
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| adj.传奇（中）的，闻名遐迩的；n.传奇（文学） | |
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Christian
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| adj.基督教徒的；n.基督教徒 | |
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