WHAT MEN LIVE BY

 What a delicate and rare and gracious art is the art of conversation! With what a dexterity¹ and skill the bubble of speech must be maneuvered² if mind is to meet and mingle³ with mind.

 

There is no sadder disappointment than to realize that a conversation has been a complete failure. By which we mean that it has failed in blending or isolating⁴ for contrast the ideas, opinions and surmises⁵ of two eager minds. So often a conversation is shipwrecked by the very eagerness of one member to contribute. There must be give and take, parry and thrust, patience to hear and judgment⁶ to utter. How uneasy is the qualm as one looks back on an hour's talk and sees that the opportunity was wasted; the precious instant of intercourse⁷ gone forever: the secrets of the heart still incommunicate! Perhaps we were too anxious to hurry the moment, to enforce our own theory, to adduce instance from our own experience. Perhaps we were not patient enough to wait until our friend could express himself with ease and happiness. Perhaps we squandered⁸ the dialogue in tangent topics, in a multitude of irrelevances.

 

 

Two Men Talking

 

 

How few, how few are those gifted for real talk! There are fine merry fellows, full of mirth and shrewdly minted observation, who will not abide⁹ by one topic, who must always be lashing¹⁰ out upon some new byroad, snatching at every bush they pass. They are too excitable, too ungoverned for the joys of patient intercourse. Talk is so solemn a rite¹¹ it should be approached with prayer and must be conducted with nicety and forbearance. What steadiness and sympathy are needed if the thread of thought is to be unwound without tangles¹² or snapping! What forbearance, while each of the pair, after tentative gropings here and yonder, feels his way toward truth as he sees it. So often two in talk are like men standing¹³ back to back, each trying to describe to the other what he sees and disputing because their visions do not tally¹⁴. It takes a little time for minds to turn face to face.

 

Very often conversations are better among three than between two, for the reason that then one of the trio is always, unconsciously, acting¹⁵ as umpire, interposing fair play, recalling wandering wits to the nub of the argument, seeing that the aggressiveness of one does no foul¹⁶ to the reticence¹⁷ of another. Talk in twos may, alas¹⁸! fall into speaker and listener: talk in threes rarely does so.

 

It is little realized how slowly, how painfully, we approach the expression of truth. We are so variable, so anxious to be polite, and alternately swayed by caution or anger. Our mind oscillates like a pendulum¹⁹: it takes some time for it to come to rest. And then, the proper allowance and correction has to be made for our individual vibrations²⁰ that prevent accuracy. Even the compass needle doesn't point the true north, but only the magnetic north. Similarly our minds at best can but indicate magnetic truth, and are distorted by many things that act as iron filings do on the compass. The necessity of holding one's job: what an iron filing that is on the compass card of a man's brain!

 

We are all afraid of truth: we keep a battalion²¹ of our pet prejudices and precautions ready to throw into the argument as shock troops, rather than let our fortress²² of Truth be stormed. We have smoke bombs and decoy ships and all manner of cunning colorizations by which we conceal²³ our innards from our friends, and even from ourselves. How we fume²⁴ and fidget, how we bustle²⁵ and dodge²⁶ rather than commit ourselves.

 

In days of hurry and complication, in the incessant²⁷ pressure of human problems that thrust our days behind us, does one never dream of a way of life in which talk would be honored and exalted²⁸ to its proper place in the sun? What a zest²⁹ there is in that intimate unreserved exchange of thought, in the pursuit of the magical blue bird of joy and human satisfaction that may be seen flitting distantly through the branches of life. It was a sad thing for the world when it grew so busy that men had no time to talk. There are such treasures of knowledge and compassion³⁰ in the minds of our friends, could we only have time to talk them out of their shy quarries³¹. If we had our way, we would set aside one day a week for talking. In fact, we would reorganize the week altogether. We would have one day for Worship (let each man devote it to worship of whatever he holds dearest); one day for Work; one day for Play (probably fishing); one day for Talking; one day for Reading, and one day for Smoking and Thinking. That would leave one day for Resting, and (incidentally) interviewing employers.

 

The best week of our life was one in which we did nothing but talk. We spent it with a delightful³² gentleman who has a little bungalow³³ on the shore of a lake in Pike County. He had a great many books and cigars, both of which are conversational³⁴ stimulants³⁵. We used to lie out on the edge of the lake, in our oldest trousers, and talk. We discussed ever so many subjects; in all of them he knew immensely more than we did. We built up a complete philosophy of indolence and good will, according to Food and Sleep and Swimming their proper share of homage³⁶. We rose at 10 in the morning and began talking; we talked all day and until 3 o'clock at night. Then we went to bed and regained³⁷ strength and combativeness³⁸ for the coming day. Never was a week better spent. We committed no crimes, planned no secret treaties, devised no annexations³⁹ or indemnities⁴⁰. We envied no one. We examined the entire world and found it worth while. Meanwhile our wives, who were watching (perhaps with a little quiet indignation) from the veranda⁴¹, kept on asking us, "What on earth do you talk about?"

 

Bless their hearts, men don't have to have anything to talk about. They just talk.

 

And there is only one rule for being a good talker: learn how to listen.

 

1 dexterity   

n.(手的)灵巧，灵活

参考例句：

• You need manual dexterity to be good at video games.玩好电子游戏手要灵巧。
• I'm your inferior in manual dexterity.论手巧，我不如你。

2 maneuvered   

v.移动，用策略( maneuver的过去式和过去分词 )；操纵

参考例句：

• I maneuvered my way among the tables to the back corner of the place. 我在那些桌子间穿行，来到那地方后面的角落。 来自辞典例句
• The admiral maneuvered his ships in the battle plan. 舰队司令按作战计划进行舰队演习。 来自辞典例句

3 mingle   

vt.使混合，使相混；vi.混合起来；相交往

参考例句：

• If we mingle with the crowd,we should not be noticed.如果我们混在人群中，就不会被注意到。
• Oil will not mingle with water.油和水不相融。

4 isolating   

adj.孤立的，绝缘的v.使隔离( isolate的现在分词 )；将…剔出（以便看清和单独处理）；使（某物质、细胞等）分离；使离析

参考例句：

• Colour filters are not very effective in isolating narrow spectral bands. 一些滤色片不能很有效地分离狭窄的光谱带。 来自辞典例句
• This became known as the streak method for isolating bacteria. 这个方法以后就称为分离细菌的划线法。 来自辞典例句

5 surmises   

v.臆测，推断( surmise的第三人称单数 )；揣测；猜想

参考例句：

• The detective is completely correct in his surmises. 这个侦探所推测的完全正确。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• As the reader probably surmises, a variety of interest tables exists. 正如读者可能推测的那样，存在着各种各样的利息表。 来自辞典例句

6 judgment   

n.审判；判断力，识别力，看法，意见

参考例句：

• The chairman flatters himself on his judgment of people.主席自认为他审视人比别人高明。
• He's a man of excellent judgment.他眼力过人。

7 intercourse   

n.性交；交流，交往，交际

参考例句：

• The magazine becomes a cultural medium of intercourse between the two peoples.该杂志成为两民族间文化交流的媒介。
• There was close intercourse between them.他们过往很密。

8 squandered   

v.（指钱，财产等）浪费，乱花( squander的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• He squandered all his money on gambling. 他把自己所有的钱都糟蹋在赌博上了。
• She felt as indignant as if her own money had been squandered. 她心里十分生气，好像是她自己的钱给浪费掉了似的。 来自飘（部分）

9 abide   

vi.遵守；坚持；vt.忍受

参考例句：

• You must abide by the results of your mistakes.你必须承担你的错误所造成的后果。
• If you join the club,you have to abide by its rules.如果你参加俱乐部，你就得遵守它的规章。

10 lashing   

n.鞭打；痛斥；大量；许多v.鞭打( lash的现在分词 )；煽动；紧系；怒斥

参考例句：

• The speaker was lashing the crowd. 演讲人正在煽动人群。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• The rain was lashing the windows. 雨急打着窗子。 来自《简明英汉词典》

11 rite   

n.典礼，惯例，习俗

参考例句：

• This festival descends from a religious rite.这个节日起源于宗教仪式。
• Most traditional societies have transition rites at puberty.大多数传统社会都为青春期的孩子举行成人礼。

12 tangles   

（使）缠结， （使）乱作一团( tangle的第三人称单数 )

参考例句：

• Long hair tangles easily. 长头发容易打结。
• Tangles like this still interrupted their intercourse. 像这类纠缠不清的误会仍然妨碍着他们的交情。

13 standing   

n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的

参考例句：

• After the earthquake only a few houses were left standing.地震过后只有几幢房屋还立着。
• They're standing out against any change in the law.他们坚决反对对法律做任何修改。

14 tally   

n.计数器，记分，一致，测量；vt.计算，记录，使一致；vi.计算，记分，一致

参考例句：

• Don't forget to keep a careful tally of what you spend.别忘了仔细记下你的开支账目。
• The facts mentioned in the report tally to every detail.报告中所提到的事实都丝毫不差。

15 acting   

n.演戏，行为，假装；adj.代理的，临时的，演出用的

参考例句：

• Ignore her,she's just acting.别理她，她只是假装的。
• During the seventies,her acting career was in eclipse.在七十年代，她的表演生涯黯然失色。

16 foul   

adj.污秽的；邪恶的；v.弄脏；妨害；犯规；n.犯规

参考例句：

• Take off those foul clothes and let me wash them.脱下那些脏衣服让我洗一洗。
• What a foul day it is!多么恶劣的天气！

17 reticence   

n.沉默，含蓄

参考例句：

• He breaks out of his normal reticence and tells me the whole story.他打破了平时一贯沈默寡言的习惯，把事情原原本本都告诉了我。
• He always displays a certain reticence in discussing personal matters.他在谈论个人问题时总显得有些保留。

18 alas   

int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等)

参考例句：

• Alas!The window is broken!哎呀！窗子破了！
• Alas,the truth is less romantic.然而，真理很少带有浪漫色彩。

19 pendulum   

n.摆，钟摆

参考例句：

• The pendulum swung slowly to and fro.钟摆在慢慢地来回摆动。
• He accidentally found that the desk clock did not swing its pendulum.他无意中发现座钟不摇摆了。

20 vibrations   

n.摆动( vibration的名词复数 )；震动；感受；（偏离平衡位置的）一次性往复振动

参考例句：

• We could feel the vibrations from the trucks passing outside. 我们可以感到外面卡车经过时的颤动。
• I am drawn to that girl; I get good vibrations from her. 我被那女孩吸引住了，她使我产生良好的感觉。 来自《简明英汉词典》

21 battalion   

n.营；部队；大队(的人)

参考例句：

• The town was garrisoned by a battalion.该镇由一营士兵驻守。
• At the end of the drill parade,the battalion fell out.操练之后，队伍解散了。

22 fortress   

n.堡垒，防御工事

参考例句：

• They made an attempt on a fortress.他们试图夺取这一要塞。
• The soldier scaled the wall of the fortress by turret.士兵通过塔车攀登上了要塞的城墙。

23 conceal   

v.隐藏，隐瞒，隐蔽

参考例句：

• He had to conceal his identity to escape the police.为了躲避警方，他只好隐瞒身份。
• He could hardly conceal his joy at his departure.他几乎掩饰不住临行时的喜悦。

24 fume   

n.(usu pl.)(浓烈或难闻的)烟，气，汽

参考例句：

• The pressure of fume in chimney increases slowly from top to bottom.烟道内压力自上而下逐渐增加，底层住户的排烟最为不利。
• Your harsh words put her in a fume.你那些难听的话使她生气了。

25 bustle   

v.喧扰地忙乱，匆忙，奔忙；n.忙碌；喧闹

参考例句：

• The bustle and din gradually faded to silence as night advanced.随着夜越来越深，喧闹声逐渐沉寂。
• There is a lot of hustle and bustle in the railway station.火车站里非常拥挤。

26 dodge   

v.闪开，躲开，避开；n.妙计，诡计

参考例句：

• A dodge behind a tree kept her from being run over.她向树后一闪，才没被车从身上辗过。
• The dodge was coopered by the police.诡计被警察粉碎了。

27 incessant   

adj.不停的，连续的

参考例句：

• We have had incessant snowfall since yesterday afternoon.从昨天下午开始就持续不断地下雪。
• She is tired of his incessant demands for affection.她厌倦了他对感情的不断索取。

28 exalted   

adj.(地位等)高的，崇高的；尊贵的，高尚的

参考例句：

• Their loveliness and holiness in accordance with their exalted station.他们的美丽和圣洁也与他们的崇高地位相称。
• He received respect because he was a person of exalted rank.他因为是个地位崇高的人而受到尊敬。

29 zest   

n.乐趣；滋味，风味；兴趣

参考例句：

• He dived into his new job with great zest.他充满热情地投入了新的工作。
• He wrote his novel about his trip to Asia with zest.他兴趣浓厚的写了一本关于他亚洲之行的小说。

30 compassion   

n.同情，怜悯

参考例句：

• He could not help having compassion for the poor creature.他情不自禁地怜悯起那个可怜的人来。
• Her heart was filled with compassion for the motherless children.她对于没有母亲的孩子们充满了怜悯心。

31 quarries   

n.（采）石场( quarry的名词复数 )；猎物（指鸟，兽等）；方形石；（格窗等的）方形玻璃v.从采石场采得( quarry的第三人称单数 )；从（书本等中）努力发掘（资料等）；在采石场采石

参考例句：

• This window was filled with old painted glass in quarries. 这窗户是由旧日的彩色菱形玻璃装配的。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• They hewed out the stones for the building from nearby quarries. 他们从邻近的采石场开凿出石头供建造那栋房子用。 来自辞典例句

32 delightful   

adj.令人高兴的，使人快乐的

参考例句：

• We had a delightful time by the seashore last Sunday.上星期天我们在海滨玩得真痛快。
• Peter played a delightful melody on his flute.彼得用笛子吹奏了一支欢快的曲子。

33 bungalow   

n.平房，周围有阳台的木造小平房

参考例句：

• A bungalow does not have an upstairs.平房没有上层。
• The old couple sold that large house and moved into a small bungalow.老两口卖掉了那幢大房子，搬进了小平房。

34 conversational   

adj.对话的，会话的

参考例句：

• The article is written in a conversational style.该文是以对话的形式写成的。
• She values herself on her conversational powers.她常夸耀自己的能言善辩。

35 stimulants   

n.兴奋剂( stimulant的名词复数 )；含兴奋剂的饮料；刺激物；激励物

参考例句：

• Coffee and tea are mild stimulants. 咖啡和茶是轻度兴奋剂。
• At lower concentrations they may even be stimulants of cell division. 在浓度较低时，它们甚至能促进细胞分裂。 来自辞典例句

36 homage   

n.尊敬，敬意，崇敬

参考例句：

• We pay homage to the genius of Shakespeare.我们对莎士比亚的天才表示敬仰。
• The soldiers swore to pay their homage to the Queen.士兵们宣誓效忠于女王陛下。

37 regained   

复得( regain的过去式和过去分词 )； 赢回； 重回； 复至某地

参考例句：

• The majority of the people in the world have regained their liberty. 世界上大多数人已重获自由。
• She hesitated briefly but quickly regained her poise. 她犹豫片刻，但很快恢复了镇静。

38 combativeness   

n.好战

参考例句：

• While they were with Jesus, any slight shown to Him aroused their indignation and combativeness. 他们与耶稣同在时，只要有人对耶稣表示轻视，就会激起他们的愤恨和抨击。 来自互联网

39 annexations   

n.并吞，附加，附加物( annexation的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• The colonialists stubbornly defended their annexations with fire and sword. 殖民主义者大肆烧杀，顽固防守他们吞并的领土。 来自互联网
• Thank God that Russia looks to the energy weapon rather than military power and territorial annexations. 谢天谢地，俄罗斯选择了能源作为武器，而不是军事力量和吞并领土等手段。 来自互联网

40 indemnities   

n.保障( indemnity的名词复数 )；赔偿；赔款；补偿金

参考例句：

• Experience shows that large indemnities do not work. 经验证明大量的赔款是行不通的。 来自辞典例句
• The imperialist powers repeatedly forced the Qing government to cede territory and pay indemnities. 帝国主义列强多次强迫清朝政府割地赔款。 来自辞典例句

41 veranda   

n.走廊；阳台

参考例句：

• She sat in the shade on the veranda.她坐在阳台上的遮荫处。
• They were strolling up and down the veranda.他们在走廊上来回徜徉。