It had grown suddenly cold: he had to fetch Captain Scottie's pea-jacket to wear at the wheel. On the long spilling crests7, that crumbled8 and spread running layers of froth in their hurry shoreward, the Pomerania rode home. She knew her landfall and seemed to quicken. Steadily9 swinging on the jade-green surges, she buried her nose almost to the hawse-pipes, then lifted until her streaming forefoot gleamed out of a frilled ruffle11 of foam12.
Gissing, too, was eager. A tingling13 buoyancy and impatience14 took hold of him: he fidgeted with sheer eagerness for life. Land, the beloved stability of our dear and only earth, drew and charmed him. Behind was the senseless, heartbreaking sea. Now he could discern hills rising in a gilded15 opaline light. In the volatile16 thin air was a quick sense of strangeness. A new world was close about him: a world that he could see, and feel, and inhale17, and yet knew nothing of.
Suddenly a great humility18 possessed19 him. He had been froward and silly and vain. He had shouted arrogantly20 at Beauty, like a noisy tourist in a canyon21; and the only answer, after long waiting, had been the paltry22 diminished echo of his own voice. He thought shamefully23 of his follies24. What matter how you name God or in what words you praise Him? In this new foreign land he would quietly accept things as he found them. The laughter of God was too strange to understand.
No, there was no answer. He was doubly damned, for he had made truth a mere25 sport of intellectual riddling26. The mind, like a spinning flywheel of fatigued27 steel, was gradually racked to bursting by the conflict of stresses. And yet: every equilibrium28 was an opposure of forces. Rotation29, if swift enough, creates amazing stability: he had seen how the gyroscope can balance at apparently30 impossible angles. Perhaps it was so of the mind. If it twirls at high speed it can lean right out over the abyss without collapse31. But the stationary32 mind—he thought of Bishop33 Borzoi—must keep away from the edge. Try to force it to the edge, it raves34 in panic. Every mind, very likely, knows its own frailties35, and does well to safeguard them. At any rate, that was the most generous interpretation36. Most minds, undoubtedly37, were uneasy in high places. They doubted their ability to refrain from jumping off. How many bones of fine intellects lay whitening at the foot of the theological cliff—It seemed to be a lonely coast, and wintry. Patches of snow lay upon the hills, the woods were bare and brown. A bottle-necked harbour opened out before him. He reduced the engines to Dead Slow and glided38 gaily through the strait. He had been anxious lest his navigation might not be equal to the occasion: he did not want to disgrace himself at this final test. But all seemed to arrange itself with enchanted39 ease. A steep ledge40 of ground offered a natural pier41, with tree-stumps for bollards. He let her come gently beyond the spot; reversed the propellers43 just at the right time, and backed neatly44 alongside. He moved the telegraph handle to FINISHED WITH ENGINES; ran out the gangplank smartly, and stepped ashore46. He moored47 the vessel48 fore10 and aft, and hung out fenders to prevent chafing49.
The first thing to do, he said to himself, is to get the lie of the land, and find out whether it is inhabited.
A hillside rising above the water promised a clear view. The stubble grass was dry and frosty, after the warm days at sea the chill was nipping; but what an elixir50 of air! If this is a desert island, he thought, it will be a glorious discovery. His heart was jocund51 with anticipation52. A curious foreign look in the landscape, he thought; quite unlike anything—Suddenly, where the hill arched against pearly sky, he saw narrow thread of smoke rising. He halted in alarm. Who might this be, friend or foe53? But eager agitation54 pushed him on. Burning to know, he hurried up to the brow of the hill.
The smoke mounted from a small bonfire of sticks in a sheltered thicket55, where a miraculous56 being—who was, as a matter of fact, a rather ragged57 and dingy58 vagabond—was cooking a tin of stew59 over the blaze.
Gissing stood, quivering with emotion. Joy such as he had never known darted60 through all the cords of his body. He ran, shouting, in mirth and terror. In fear, in a passion of love and knowledge and understanding, he abased61 himself and yearned62 before this marvel63. Impossible to have conceived, yet, once seen, utterly64 satisfying and the fulfilment of all needs. He laughed and leaped and worshipped. When the first transport was over, he laid his head against this being's knee, he nestled there and was content. This was the inscrutable perfect answer.
“Cripes!” said the puzzled tramp, as he caressed65 the nuzzling head. “The purp's loco. Maybe he's been lost. You might think he'd never seen a man before.”
He was right.
“I have found God,” he said.
Presently he thought of the ship. It would not do to leave her so insecurely moored. Reluctantly, with many a backward glance and a heart full of glory, he left the Presence. He ran to the edge of the hill to look down upon the harbour.
The outlook was puzzlingly altered. He gazed in astonishment67. What were those poplars, rising naked into the bright air?—there was something familiar about them. And that little house beyond... he stared bewildered.
The great shining breadth of the ocean had shrunk to the roundness of a tiny pond. And the Pomerania? He leaned over, shaken with questions. There, beside the bank, was a little plank45 of wood, a child's plaything, roughly fashioned shipshape: two chips for funnels68; red and yellow frosted leaves for flags; a withered69 dogwood blossom for propeller42. He leaned closer, with whirling mind. In the clear cool surface of the pond he could see the sky mirrored, deeper than any ocean, pellucid70, infinite, blue.
He ran up the path to the house. The scuffled ragged garden lay naked and hard. At the windows, he saw with surprise, were holly71 wreaths tied with broad red ribbon. On the porch, some battered72 toys. He opened the door.
A fluttering rosy73 light filled the room. By the fireplace the puppies—how big they were!—were sitting with Mrs. Spaniel. Joyous74 uproar75 greeted him: they flung themselves upon him. Shouts of “Daddy! Daddy!” filled the house, while the young Spaniels stood by more bashfully.
Good Mrs. Spaniel was gratefully moved. Her moist eyes shone brightly in the firelight.
“I knew you'd be home for Christmas, Mr. Gissing,” she said. “I've been telling them so all afternoon. Now, children, be still a moment and let me speak. I've been telling you your Daddy would be home in time for a Christmas Eve story. I've got to go and fix that plum pudding.”
In her excitement a clear bubble dripped from the tip of her tongue. She caught it in her apron76, and hurried to the kitchen.
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1
tawny
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adj.茶色的,黄褐色的;n.黄褐色 | |
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2
gulls
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n.鸥( gull的名词复数 )v.欺骗某人( gull的第三人称单数 ) | |
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3
hovered
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鸟( hover的过去式和过去分词 ); 靠近(某事物); (人)徘徊; 犹豫 | |
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4
hoist
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n.升高,起重机,推动;v.升起,升高,举起 | |
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5
steered
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v.驾驶( steer的过去式和过去分词 );操纵;控制;引导 | |
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gaily
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adv.欢乐地,高兴地 | |
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crests
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v.到达山顶(或浪峰)( crest的第三人称单数 );到达洪峰,达到顶点 | |
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8
crumbled
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(把…)弄碎, (使)碎成细屑( crumble的过去式和过去分词 ); 衰落; 坍塌; 损坏 | |
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9
steadily
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adv.稳定地;不变地;持续地 | |
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10
fore
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adv.在前面;adj.先前的;在前部的;n.前部 | |
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11
ruffle
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v.弄皱,弄乱;激怒,扰乱;n.褶裥饰边 | |
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12
foam
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v./n.泡沫,起泡沫 | |
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13
tingling
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v.有刺痛感( tingle的现在分词 ) | |
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14
impatience
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n.不耐烦,急躁 | |
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15
gilded
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a.镀金的,富有的 | |
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16
volatile
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adj.反复无常的,挥发性的,稍纵即逝的,脾气火爆的;n.挥发性物质 | |
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17
inhale
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v.吸入(气体等),吸(烟) | |
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18
humility
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n.谦逊,谦恭 | |
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19
possessed
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adj.疯狂的;拥有的,占有的 | |
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20
arrogantly
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adv.傲慢地 | |
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21
canyon
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n.峡谷,溪谷 | |
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22
paltry
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adj.无价值的,微不足道的 | |
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23
shamefully
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可耻地; 丢脸地; 不体面地; 羞耻地 | |
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24
follies
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罪恶,时事讽刺剧; 愚蠢,蠢笨,愚蠢的行为、思想或做法( folly的名词复数 ) | |
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25
mere
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adj.纯粹的;仅仅,只不过 | |
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26
riddling
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adj.谜一样的,解谜的n.筛选 | |
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27
fatigued
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adj. 疲乏的 | |
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28
equilibrium
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n.平衡,均衡,相称,均势,平静 | |
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29
rotation
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n.旋转;循环,轮流 | |
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30
apparently
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adv.显然地;表面上,似乎 | |
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31
collapse
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vi.累倒;昏倒;倒塌;塌陷 | |
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32
stationary
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adj.固定的,静止不动的 | |
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33
bishop
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n.主教,(国际象棋)象 | |
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34
raves
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n.狂欢晚会( rave的名词复数 )v.胡言乱语( rave的第三人称单数 );愤怒地说;咆哮;痴心地说 | |
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35
frailties
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n.脆弱( frailty的名词复数 );虚弱;(性格或行为上的)弱点;缺点 | |
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36
interpretation
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n.解释,说明,描述;艺术处理 | |
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37
undoubtedly
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adv.确实地,无疑地 | |
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38
glided
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v.滑动( glide的过去式和过去分词 );掠过;(鸟或飞机 ) 滑翔 | |
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39
enchanted
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adj. 被施魔法的,陶醉的,入迷的 动词enchant的过去式和过去分词 | |
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40
ledge
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n.壁架,架状突出物;岩架,岩礁 | |
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41
pier
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n.码头;桥墩,桥柱;[建]窗间壁,支柱 | |
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42
propeller
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n.螺旋桨,推进器 | |
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43
propellers
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n.螺旋桨,推进器( propeller的名词复数 ) | |
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44
neatly
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adv.整洁地,干净地,灵巧地,熟练地 | |
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45
plank
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n.板条,木板,政策要点,政纲条目 | |
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46
ashore
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adv.在(向)岸上,上岸 | |
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47
moored
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adj. 系泊的 动词moor的过去式和过去分词形式 | |
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48
vessel
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n.船舶;容器,器皿;管,导管,血管 | |
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49
chafing
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n.皮肤发炎v.擦热(尤指皮肤)( chafe的现在分词 );擦痛;发怒;惹怒 | |
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50
elixir
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n.长生不老药,万能药 | |
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51
jocund
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adj.快乐的,高兴的 | |
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52
anticipation
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n.预期,预料,期望 | |
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53
foe
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n.敌人,仇敌 | |
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54
agitation
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n.搅动;搅拌;鼓动,煽动 | |
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55
thicket
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n.灌木丛,树林 | |
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56
miraculous
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adj.像奇迹一样的,不可思议的 | |
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57
ragged
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adj.衣衫褴褛的,粗糙的,刺耳的 | |
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58
dingy
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adj.昏暗的,肮脏的 | |
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59
stew
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n.炖汤,焖,烦恼;v.炖汤,焖,忧虑 | |
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60
darted
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v.投掷,投射( dart的过去式和过去分词 );向前冲,飞奔 | |
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61
abased
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使谦卑( abase的过去式和过去分词 ); 使感到羞耻; 使降低(地位、身份等); 降下 | |
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62
yearned
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渴望,切盼,向往( yearn的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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63
marvel
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vi.(at)惊叹vt.感到惊异;n.令人惊异的事 | |
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64
utterly
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adv.完全地,绝对地 | |
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65
caressed
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爱抚或抚摸…( caress的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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66
spicy
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adj.加香料的;辛辣的,有风味的 | |
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67
astonishment
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n.惊奇,惊异 | |
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68
funnels
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漏斗( funnel的名词复数 ); (轮船,火车等的)烟囱 | |
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69
withered
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adj. 枯萎的,干瘪的,(人身体的部分器官)因病萎缩的或未发育良好的 动词wither的过去式和过去分词形式 | |
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70
pellucid
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adj.透明的,简单的 | |
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71
holly
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n.[植]冬青属灌木 | |
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72
battered
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adj.磨损的;v.连续猛击;磨损 | |
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73
rosy
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adj.美好的,乐观的,玫瑰色的 | |
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74
joyous
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adj.充满快乐的;令人高兴的 | |
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75
uproar
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n.骚动,喧嚣,鼎沸 | |
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76
apron
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n.围裙;工作裙 | |
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