:: “Ich hab’ mein Sach auf Nichts gestellt,
Juchhe! Drum ist’s so wohl mir in der Welt; Juchhe!”—G?the.
“He got so subtle that to be Nothing was all his glory.” Shelley, “Peter Bell the Third”
It is now some time since the Daily News, which, perhaps with more honor than profit, and not seldom at great risk of its life, had been for many years a really leading Liberal journal, fighting gallantly1 always in the van, often in forlorn hopes, took to heart a certain very-obvious truth. It awoke fully2 to the fact that while a captain in the forlorn hope or vanguard is constantly in great peril3, and has but few supporters, one with the main body is much less exposed and has many more to help him. Weary and discouraged, it resolved to fall back from the front and join the mass of the army, the myriads4 of the commonplace and the timorous5, the legions of the rich and respectable, the countless6 hosts of the snobbery7 of Bumbledom. But in making this “strategic movement,” it is well aware that honor equal to the danger is attached to the forlorn hope and the vanguard, and it clung to the honor while renouncing8 the danger, and continued to call itself a leading Liberal journal when it had quite given up the lead—nay, continues thus to vaunt itself still. This is how some malicious9 people explain the altered position of the Daily News and its growing number of supporters, or, in the language of periodicals, its increasing circulation. Now, say these impatient and intemperate10 persons, a paper is free to serve Bumble (as nearly all papers do), or to serve Progress, the enemy of Bumble; but it has no right, while serving the one, to claim the merit of serving the other. This Daily News, they go on, which still dares to call itself Liberal, is now just as liberal as the jester’s Garrick, who used to set out with generous intentions, and was scared back at the corner of the street by the ghost of a ha’penny. In its case it is the ghost of a penny, the ghost of the representative penny of all the pennies ready to buy vapid11 twaddle, but not earnest thought.
For my own part, however, I find the Daily News still really liberal, and, in fact, extremely liberal. It is liberal in long special telegrams and interminable Jenkins letters about the most insignificant12 movements and actions of royal personages. It is equally liberal in reticence13, slightly tempered by sneers14, as to all advanced movements, all unpopular principles and their champions. It is liberal in the space it gives to all fashionable frivolities, sports and pastimes, to all the bagatelles of life. If it has not a paragraph to spare for a Radical15 meeting, it has always columns at the command of boat races, yacht races, horse races, cricket and polo matches, and the like important events, as well as other columns for the gossip of clubs and the babble16 of society. It is liberal in hopefulness that wrong may be right, falsehood truth, evil good. It is very liberal in soft phrases, and in “passages that lead to nothing.” Nothing, indeed, is the great end of its endeavor; for what alteration18 can be needed by a world in which the circulation of the Daily News is continually increasing? Unless, perchance, as the circulation is already “world-wide,” the world will have to be extended in order to accommodate it. But this concerns Father God or Mother Nature, not mere19 mortals. All these liberalities I could amply illustrate20 did space permit; as it is, I can give but an instance each to the first two. The Prince of Wales being in France, amusing himself like any other man who has money and leisure, “The Prince of Wales in France—Special,” heads its placards in the largest letters. On the other hand, I heard one of our three or four greatest writers, Garth Wilkinson, declare at a public meeting that he had written several letters to it on a subject then agitating21 the public mind, but that he could as easily get a letter into the moon as into the Daily News. Yet the subject was medical; and Garth Wilkinson is not only one of our greatest writers and thinkers, but also an M.D. and F.R.S., who has practised for I know not how much more than a quarter of a century. To refuse his letters on that matter was like refusing to hear Carlyle on Cromwell or Darwin on Natural Selection. Why, then, did the Daily News reject them? For the simply sufficient reason that they advocated the unpopular side of the question.
Yes, it is still liberal and beyond measure liberal in these and many other respects. It has still great care of the people—to keep aloof22 from them; it loves them more than ever—at a distance. It still belongs to the Left—in the rear. It is still of the Mountain, only it has descended23 to provision itself; as the sage17 rhyme runs,
“The mountain sheep were sweeter,
But the valley sheep were fatter;
We therefore deemed it meeter
To carry off the latter.”
It is still Radical, having a rooted love of ease and hatred24 of disturbance25. It is still revolutionary, but has resolved that henceforth revolutions shall be made with rose-water, and omelettes without breaking of....
While thus freely acknowledging that in many things the Daily News is now more liberal than ever it was, I must also record my admiration26 for its strenuous27 endeavors to assume an air of aristocratic refinement28 and repose29. From its serene30 indifference31 to the troubles of vulgar humanity, from the languid lisp and drawl of its voice, from its perpetual allusions32 to the luxuries and enjoyments33 of the wealthy and noble, one readily divines that its staff, like the staff of my Lord Chamberlain or other court lackey34, can move only in the highest circles; but whether its members are admitted into these as gentlemen or as gentlemen’s gentlemen, I must leave for those familiar with such circles to declare. This is certain, that they flit about amidst a lordly festival in the gay and careless fashion of men who have no thought save of enjoying themselves; not like poor devils who have duties which, though better paid, are as onerous35 and strictly36 subservient37 to the gathering38 as those of the waiters or the footmen. It must surely be by a mere afterthought, and purely39 for their own amusement, that they throw off a description of the scene and an account of what occurred there. By the bye, it is rumored40 that the staff has been thoroughly41 changed of late years. The old members were able enough, but they were too coarse, too loud, too violent, too opiniative, too much given to discussing important questions as if they really cared for the same. Their manners especially could not be endured One entered the Editor’s sanctum (which had then just been refurnished under the supervision42 of the Count of Monte Cristo) in his wet boots, although embroidered43 slippers44 were provided at the foot of the stairs. Another exploded with a “Damned old idiot!” on reading the charge of one of our Right Reverend Fathers in God. Another was caught smoking a clay pipe over a pint45 of beer, although narghilés and hookahs and the choicest cigarettes, with unlimited46 supplies of the most costly47 wines and liqueurs, are always set out for the staff and such visitors as are admitted to the inner offices. The Daily News wrote to my Lord Chief Justice demanding that this fellow should be sent without trial to keep company with Arthur Orton, and for all I know the Chief Justice humbly48 obeyed. Another was seen walking arm-in-arm with the Editor of the Times, and was of course instantly dismissed, the Daily News writing to warn the man of the other journal.
This, I am assured, is historical fact, to which the Editor of the Times will bear witness, if he be not ashamed to avow49 what may seem to hurt his dignity. For these and the like offences the old members have been all dismissed.
It is said to be a peculiarity50 of the Daily News that all the leading articles are manufactured on the premises51, if I may venture on a shop phrase in such a connection. I have spoken of the luxury of the Editor’s sanctum, which is a large and noble apartment. The leader-writers are borne to the office in closed carriages, with double or triple windows and india-rubber tires, lest some rude oath, or nasty smell, or even the loud noise of the streets should shock them into hysterics, or at least so unstring their nerves as to render writing impossible for the day. In the sumptuous52 boudoir-sanctum, lounging, smoking, and sipping53, they receive on silver salvers telegrams from all parts of the rolling globe, with innumerable communications and documents, written and printed; and such of these as they are pleased to look at tin Epicurean gods:
“For they lie beside their nectar,
Far below them in the valleys.”
They lie a good deal beside their nectar; but their bolts are anything but thunderbolts. Thunderbolts! The mere word would make these gasp55 and shudder56. They are not thunderbolts, they are not rockets, they are not even squibs; they are bonbons57 and genuine confetti, not your confetti of the Carnival58.
“*There* they smile in secret, looking over wasted lands,
Clanging fights and flaming towns, and sinking ships and praying hands.
But they smile, they find a music centered in a doleful song
Steaming up, a lamentation61 and an ancient tale of wrong,
Like a tale of little meaning, tho the words are strong;
Storing yearly little dues of wheat, and wine and oil.”
Naturally these lofty beings smile; for what have they to do with the cares and woes64, the hopes and fears of ordinary mortals? Besides, battles and shipwrecks65, disasters and convulsions, make the best of copy; and the music centred in the doleful song is a hymn66 of triumph, with the glorious refrain, “Our circulation is still increasing! Our world-wide circulation continues to increase!” And surely the ill-used race of men that till the soil should be appeased67 and amply satisfied by the showers of bonbons and sweetmeats the Daily News is always flinging down. It has more important duties to attend to than fighting the battles and righting the wrongs of an ignorant, passionate68, unreasonable69, wretched rabble70, considerably71 addicted72 to dirt, drunkenness, and vice73. For thirty hours at least in every twenty-four it is in attendance on some Royalty74 or another, or at the sports and entertainments of “Society, with a capital S.” It is said that the “copy” of these superlative writers, who always wear kid gloves while writing, is written with golden pens and tinted75 and perfumed ink, on perfumed and tinted paper. It is moreover said that the journal itself is soon to be printed on vellum, in the illuminated76 style, with arabesque77 borders. It is also rumored that the Court Journal and the Morning Post, finding themselves quite outdone by the Daily News, and their occupation gone, will shortly cease to appear.
I must not omit to mention that I have been told on authority, which I incline to consider good, that in the said gorgeous sanctum is conspicuous78 a table of commandments, wrought79 in letters of fine gold, which commandments are these:
III. Thou shalt never write an unqualified sentence, or risk an unmodified statement.
IV. Thy style shall be always in the tone of a sweet murmur82 or soft whisper; a lullaby of peace for drowsy-headed Bumbledom.
V. Thou shalt write with an air of assured superiority to everybody, and everything.
VI. Thou shalt ever bear in mind that there is no joy but calm, and that the supreme83 moral excellence84 is good taste, which may be quite compatible with meanness, servility, and cowardice85, but cannot be compatible with the foolish fervor86 of zeal87.
VII. Thou shalt always mention and allude88 to as many persons, places, and luxuries of high life as possible.
VIII. Thou shalt drag into every article three or four literary citations89 or allusions, whether relevant or irrelevant90, in order to show to the world thy culture.
IX. Thou shalt carefully avoid mention of all ardent91 reformers and unpopular thinkers, and their doings, save to lightly banter92 or coldly rebuke93 them.
X. Thou shalt treat with profound respect and tenderness all the powers that be, and all popular opinions, social, political and religious, however thou mayest contemn94 them in thy heart; for great Bumble is the sole lord of large circulations, and only through his continued grace can our circulation continue to increase.
It is by assiduously conforming themselves to this most wise and holy decalogue, that the members of the staff of the Daily News have become such rare flowers of sweetness and light; worthy95 of that serene Professor of Haughty-culture, Matthew Arnold himself, ere he had perpetrated “Literature and Dogma.”
But while, in common with all the other worshippers of the Daily News, I exult96 in its world-wide and ever-increasing circulation, I am haunted by a horrible fear, which I cannot conceal97, but will hint and whisper as gently as possible. When a stone falls into a pond—but no, pond is vulgar—when a stone falls into a still lake, the first small rings are clearly defined, but the circlings as they enlarge grow fainter and fainter, until at length they can no more be perceived. Now, as all the world knows, our beloved and revered98 Daily News, in its ever-increasing circulation, has hitherto followed precisely99 the same law; and my dread100 is that it will continue to do so unto the utmost extremity101, becoming ever more and more faint and undefined as the circulation increases, until it shall altogether vanish away. It is getting so refined that I fear it will soon be fined away to nothing; so delicate and dainty, that it is already unfit for this rough world, whose slightest shock may kill it; so ethereal that its complete evaporation102 seems imminent103; so supernal104 that it must surely soon disappear, absorbed into the Empyrean. May that good God, who we have been told “will think twice before damning a person of quality,” think many, many times before condemning105 our fashionable world to such an irreparable loss!
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gallantly
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adv. 漂亮地,勇敢地,献殷勤地 | |
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fully
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adv.完全地,全部地,彻底地;充分地 | |
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peril
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n.(严重的)危险;危险的事物 | |
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myriads
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n.无数,极大数量( myriad的名词复数 ) | |
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timorous
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adj.胆怯的,胆小的 | |
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countless
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adj.无数的,多得不计其数的 | |
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snobbery
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n. 充绅士气派, 俗不可耐的性格 | |
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renouncing
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v.声明放弃( renounce的现在分词 );宣布放弃;宣布与…决裂;宣布摒弃 | |
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malicious
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adj.有恶意的,心怀恶意的 | |
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intemperate
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adj.无节制的,放纵的 | |
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vapid
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adj.无味的;无生气的 | |
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insignificant
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adj.无关紧要的,可忽略的,无意义的 | |
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reticence
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n.沉默,含蓄 | |
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sneers
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讥笑的表情(言语)( sneer的名词复数 ) | |
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radical
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n.激进份子,原子团,根号;adj.根本的,激进的,彻底的 | |
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babble
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v.含糊不清地说,胡言乱语地说,儿语 | |
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sage
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n.圣人,哲人;adj.贤明的,明智的 | |
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alteration
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n.变更,改变;蚀变 | |
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mere
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adj.纯粹的;仅仅,只不过 | |
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illustrate
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v.举例说明,阐明;图解,加插图 | |
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agitating
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搅动( agitate的现在分词 ); 激怒; 使焦虑不安; (尤指为法律、社会状况的改变而)激烈争论 | |
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aloof
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adj.远离的;冷淡的,漠不关心的 | |
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descended
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a.为...后裔的,出身于...的 | |
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hatred
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n.憎恶,憎恨,仇恨 | |
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disturbance
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n.动乱,骚动;打扰,干扰;(身心)失调 | |
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admiration
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n.钦佩,赞美,羡慕 | |
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strenuous
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adj.奋发的,使劲的;紧张的;热烈的,狂热的 | |
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refinement
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n.文雅;高尚;精美;精制;精炼 | |
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repose
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v.(使)休息;n.安息 | |
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serene
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adj. 安详的,宁静的,平静的 | |
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indifference
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n.不感兴趣,不关心,冷淡,不在乎 | |
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allusions
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暗指,间接提到( allusion的名词复数 ) | |
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enjoyments
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愉快( enjoyment的名词复数 ); 令人愉快的事物; 享有; 享受 | |
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lackey
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n.侍从;跟班 | |
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onerous
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adj.繁重的 | |
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strictly
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adv.严厉地,严格地;严密地 | |
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subservient
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adj.卑屈的,阿谀的 | |
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gathering
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n.集会,聚会,聚集 | |
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purely
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adv.纯粹地,完全地 | |
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rumored
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adj.传说的,谣传的v.传闻( rumor的过去式和过去分词 );[古]名誉;咕哝;[古]喧嚷 | |
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thoroughly
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adv.完全地,彻底地,十足地 | |
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supervision
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n.监督,管理 | |
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embroidered
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adj.绣花的 | |
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slippers
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n. 拖鞋 | |
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pint
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n.品脱 | |
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unlimited
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adj.无限的,不受控制的,无条件的 | |
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costly
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adj.昂贵的,价值高的,豪华的 | |
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humbly
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adv. 恭顺地,谦卑地 | |
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avow
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v.承认,公开宣称 | |
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peculiarity
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n.独特性,特色;特殊的东西;怪癖 | |
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premises
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n.建筑物,房屋 | |
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sumptuous
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adj.豪华的,奢侈的,华丽的 | |
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sipping
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v.小口喝,呷,抿( sip的现在分词 ) | |
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hurled
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v.猛投,用力掷( hurl的过去式和过去分词 );大声叫骂 | |
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gasp
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n.喘息,气喘;v.喘息;气吁吁他说 | |
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shudder
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v.战粟,震动,剧烈地摇晃;n.战粟,抖动 | |
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bonbons
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n.小糖果( bonbon的名词复数 ) | |
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carnival
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n.嘉年华会,狂欢,狂欢节,巡回表演 | |
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blight
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n.枯萎病;造成破坏的因素;vt.破坏,摧残 | |
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fiery
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adj.燃烧着的,火红的;暴躁的;激烈的 | |
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lamentation
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n.悲叹,哀悼 | |
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cleave
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v.(clave;cleaved)粘着,粘住;坚持;依恋 | |
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toil
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vi.辛劳工作,艰难地行动;n.苦工,难事 | |
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woes
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困境( woe的名词复数 ); 悲伤; 我好苦哇; 某人就要倒霉 | |
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shipwrecks
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海难,船只失事( shipwreck的名词复数 ); 沉船 | |
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hymn
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n.赞美诗,圣歌,颂歌 | |
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67
appeased
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安抚,抚慰( appease的过去式和过去分词 ); 绥靖(满足另一国的要求以避免战争) | |
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passionate
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adj.热情的,热烈的,激昂的,易动情的,易怒的,性情暴躁的 | |
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unreasonable
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adj.不讲道理的,不合情理的,过度的 | |
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rabble
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n.乌合之众,暴民;下等人 | |
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considerably
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adv.极大地;相当大地;在很大程度上 | |
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addicted
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adj.沉溺于....的,对...上瘾的 | |
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vice
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n.坏事;恶习;[pl.]台钳,老虎钳;adj.副的 | |
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royalty
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n.皇家,皇族 | |
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tinted
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adj. 带色彩的 动词tint的过去式和过去分词 | |
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illuminated
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adj.被照明的;受启迪的 | |
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arabesque
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n.阿拉伯式花饰;adj.阿拉伯式图案的 | |
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conspicuous
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adj.明眼的,惹人注目的;炫耀的,摆阔气的 | |
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wrought
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v.引起;以…原料制作;运转;adj.制造的 | |
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abhor
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v.憎恶;痛恨 | |
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decided
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adj.决定了的,坚决的;明显的,明确的 | |
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82
murmur
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n.低语,低声的怨言;v.低语,低声而言 | |
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supreme
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adj.极度的,最重要的;至高的,最高的 | |
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84
excellence
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n.优秀,杰出,(pl.)优点,美德 | |
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85
cowardice
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n.胆小,怯懦 | |
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fervor
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n.热诚;热心;炽热 | |
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zeal
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n.热心,热情,热忱 | |
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88
allude
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v.提及,暗指 | |
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89
citations
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n.引用( citation的名词复数 );引证;引文;表扬 | |
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90
irrelevant
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adj.不恰当的,无关系的,不相干的 | |
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91
ardent
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adj.热情的,热烈的,强烈的,烈性的 | |
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92
banter
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n.嘲弄,戏谑;v.取笑,逗弄,开玩笑 | |
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93
rebuke
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v.指责,非难,斥责 [反]praise | |
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94
contemn
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v.蔑视 | |
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95
worthy
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adj.(of)值得的,配得上的;有价值的 | |
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96
exult
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v.狂喜,欢腾;欢欣鼓舞 | |
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97
conceal
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v.隐藏,隐瞒,隐蔽 | |
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98
revered
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v.崇敬,尊崇,敬畏( revere的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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99
precisely
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adv.恰好,正好,精确地,细致地 | |
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100
dread
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vt.担忧,忧虑;惧怕,不敢;n.担忧,畏惧 | |
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101
extremity
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n.末端,尽头;尽力;终极;极度 | |
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102
evaporation
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n.蒸发,消失 | |
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103
imminent
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adj.即将发生的,临近的,逼近的 | |
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104
supernal
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adj.天堂的,天上的;崇高的 | |
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105
condemning
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v.(通常因道义上的原因而)谴责( condemn的现在分词 );宣判;宣布…不能使用;迫使…陷于不幸的境地 | |
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