VIII NATIONAL ANTHEM

 Out here the telephone exists largely as a vehicle for the jeux d'esprit of the Brass¹ Lids. It is a one-way affair, working only from the inside out, for if you have a trifle of repartee² to impart to the Brazen³ Ones, the apparatus⁴ is either indefinitely engaged, or Na poo (as the French say). If you are one of these bulldog lads and are determined⁵ to make the thing talk from the outside in, you had better migrate chez Signals, taking your bed, blankets, beer, tobacco and the unexpired portion of next week's ration⁶, and camp at the telephone orderly's elbow. After a day or two it will percolate⁷ through to the varlet's intelligence that you are a desperate dog in urgent need of something, and he will bestir himself, and mayhap in a further two or three days' time he will wind a crank, pull some strings⁸, and announce that you are "on," and you will find yourself in animated⁹ conversation with an inspector¹⁰ of cemeteries¹¹, a jam expert at the Base, or the Dalai Lama. If you want to give back-chat to the Staff you had best take it there by hand.

 

A friend of mine by name of Patrick once got the job of Temporary Assistant Deputy Lance Staff Captain (unpaid), and before he tumbled to the one-way idea, his telephone worked both ways and gave him a lot of trouble. People were always calling him up and asking him questions, which of course wasn't playing the game at all. Sometimes he never got to bed before 10 p.m., answering questions; often he was up again at 9 a.m., answering more questions—and such questions!

 

A sample. On one occasion he rang up his old battalion¹². One Jimmy was then Acting¹³ Assistant Vice-Adjutant. "Hello, wazzermatter?" said Jimmy. "Staff Captain speaking," said Patrick sternly. "Please furnish a return of all cooks, smoke-helmets, bombs, mules¹⁴, Yukon packs, tin bowlers¹⁵, grease-traps and Plymouth Brothers you have in the field!"

 

"Easy—beg pardon, yes, Sir," said Jimmy and hung up.

 

Presently the 'phone buzzed and there was Jimmy again.

 

"Excuse me, Sir, but you wanted a return of various commodities we have in the field. What field?"

 

"Oh, the field of Mars, fat-head!" Patrick snapped and rang off. A quarter of an hour later he was called to the 'phone once more and the familiar bleat¹⁶ of Jimmy tickled¹⁷ his ear. "Excuse me, Sir—whose mother?"

 

On the other hand the great Brass Hat is human and makes a slip, a clerical error, now and again, sufficient to expose his flank. And then the humble¹⁸ fighting man can draw his drop of blood if he is quick about it. To this same long-suffering Jimmy was vouchsafed¹⁹ the heaven-sent opportunity, and he leapt at it. He got a chit from H.Q., dated 6/7/17, which ran thus:—

 

"In reference to 17326 Pte. Hogan we note that his date of birth is 10/7/17. Please place him in his proper category."

 

To which Jimmy replied:—

 

"As according to your showing 17326 Pte. Hogan will not be born for another four days we are placed in a position of some difficulty.

 

Signed ————

 

"P.S.—What if, when the interesting event occurs 17326 Pte. Hogan should be a girl?

 

"P.S.S.—Or twins?"

 

 

 

Our Albert Edward is just back from one of those Army finishing schools where the young subaltern's knowledge of Shakespeare and the use of the globes is given a final shampoo before he is pushed over the top. Albert Edward's academy was situated²⁰ in a small town where schools are maintained by all our brave Allies; it is an educational centre. The French school does the honours of the place and keeps a tame band, which gives tongue every Sunday evening in the Grand Place. Thither²¹ repair all the young ladies of the town to hear the music. Thither also repair all the young subalterns, also for the purpose of hearing the music.

 

At the end of every performance the national anthems²² of all our brave Allies are played, each brave Ally standing²⁴ rigidly²⁵ to attention the while, in compliment to the others. As we have a lot of brave Allies these days, all with long national war-whoops, this becomes somewhat of a strain.

 

One morning the French bandmaster called on the Commandant of the English school.

 

"Some Americans have arrived," said he. "They are naturally as welcome as the sunshine, but" (he sighed) "it means yet another national anthem²³."

 

The Commandant sighed and said he supposed so.

 

"By the way," said the chef d'orchestre, "what is the American national anthem?"

 

"'Yankee Doodle,'" replied the Commandant.

 

The Chief Instructor²⁶ said he'd always understood it was "Hail, Columbia."

 

The Adjutant was of the opinion that "The Star-Spangled Banner" filled the bill, while the Quartermaster cast his vote for "My Country, 'tis of thee."

 

The chef d'orchestre thrashed his bosom²⁷ and rent his coiffure. "Dieu!" he wailed²⁸, "I can't play all of them—figurez-vous!"

 

Without stopping to do any figuring they heartily²⁹ agreed that he couldn't. "Tell you what," said the Commandant at length, "write to your music merchant in Paris and leave it to him."

 

The chef d'orchestre said he would, and did so.

 

Next Sunday evening, as the concert drew to a close, the band flung into the Marseillaise, and the subalterns of all nations leapt to attention. They stood to attention through "God Save the King," through the national anthems of Russia, Italy, Portugal, Rumania, Serbia, Belgium, Montenegro and Monte Carlo, all our brave Allies. Then the chef d'orchestre suddenly sprang upon a stool and waved above his head the stripes and stars of our newest brave Ally, while the band crashed into the opening strains of "When the midnight choo-choo starts for Alabam." It speaks volumes for the discipline of the Allied³⁰ armies that their young subalterns stood to attention even through that.

1 brass   

n.黄铜；黄铜器，铜管乐器

参考例句：

• Many of the workers play in the factory's brass band.许多工人都在工厂铜管乐队中演奏。
• Brass is formed by the fusion of copper and zinc.黄铜是通过铜和锌的熔合而成的。

2 repartee   

n.机敏的应答

参考例句：

• This diplomat possessed an excellent gift for repartee.这位外交官具有卓越的应对才能。
• He was a brilliant debater and his gift of repartee was celebrated.他擅长辩论，以敏于应答著称。

3 brazen   

adj.厚脸皮的，无耻的，坚硬的

参考例句：

• The brazen woman laughed loudly at the judge who sentenced her.那无耻的女子冲着给她判刑的法官高声大笑。
• Some people prefer to brazen a thing out rather than admit defeat.有的人不愿承认失败，而是宁肯厚着脸皮干下去。

4 apparatus   

n.装置，器械；器具，设备

参考例句：

• The school's audio apparatus includes films and records.学校的视听设备包括放映机和录音机。
• They had a very refined apparatus.他们有一套非常精良的设备。

5 determined   

adj.坚定的；有决心的

参考例句：

• I have determined on going to Tibet after graduation.我已决定毕业后去西藏。
• He determined to view the rooms behind the office.他决定查看一下办公室后面的房间。

6 ration   

n.定量(pl.)给养，口粮；vt.定量供应

参考例句：

• The country cut the bread ration last year.那个国家去年削减面包配给量。
• We have to ration the water.我们必须限量用水。

7 percolate   

v.过滤，渗透

参考例句：

• The rain will percolate through the soil.雨水渗入土中。
• New fashions took a long time to percolate down.新时尚要很长时间才能在大众中流行起来。

8 strings   

n.弦

参考例句：

• He sat on the bed,idly plucking the strings of his guitar.他坐在床上，随意地拨着吉他的弦。
• She swept her fingers over the strings of the harp.她用手指划过竖琴的琴弦。

9 animated   

adj.生气勃勃的，活跃的，愉快的

参考例句：

• His observations gave rise to an animated and lively discussion.他的言论引起了一场气氛热烈而活跃的讨论。
• We had an animated discussion over current events last evening.昨天晚上我们热烈地讨论时事。

10 inspector   

n.检查员，监察员，视察员

参考例句：

• The inspector was interested in everything pertaining to the school.视察员对有关学校的一切都感兴趣。
• The inspector was shining a flashlight onto the tickets.查票员打着手电筒查看车票。

11 cemeteries   

n.（非教堂的）墓地，公墓( cemetery的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• It's morbid to dwell on cemeteries and such like. 不厌其烦地谈论墓地以及诸如此类的事是一种病态。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• In other districts the proximity of cemeteries seemed to aggravate the disease. 在其它地区里，邻近墓地的地方，时疫大概都要严重些。 来自辞典例句

12 battalion   

n.营；部队；大队(的人)

参考例句：

• The town was garrisoned by a battalion.该镇由一营士兵驻守。
• At the end of the drill parade,the battalion fell out.操练之后，队伍解散了。

13 acting   

n.演戏，行为，假装；adj.代理的，临时的，演出用的

参考例句：

• Ignore her,she's just acting.别理她，她只是假装的。
• During the seventies,her acting career was in eclipse.在七十年代，她的表演生涯黯然失色。

14 mules   

骡( mule的名词复数 )； 拖鞋； 顽固的人； 越境运毒者

参考例句：

• The cart was pulled by two mules. 两匹骡子拉这辆大车。
• She wore tight trousers and high-heeled mules. 她穿紧身裤和拖鞋式高跟鞋。

15 bowlers   

n.（板球）投球手( bowler的名词复数 )；圆顶高帽

参考例句：

• Many London businessmen wear bowlers. 伦敦的许多商人戴常礼帽。 来自辞典例句
• In America in the 1800s, bowlers began betting money on games. 19世纪在美国，保龄球员们开始在游戏上赌钱。 来自互联网

16 bleat   

v.咩咩叫，(讲)废话，哭诉；n.咩咩叫，废话，哭诉

参考例句：

• He heard the bleat of a lamb.他听到小羊的叫声。
• They bleat about how miserable they are.他们诉说他们的生活是多么悲惨。

17 tickled   

（使）发痒( tickle的过去式和过去分词 )； （使）愉快，逗乐

参考例句：

• We were tickled pink to see our friends on television. 在电视中看到我们的一些朋友，我们高兴极了。
• I tickled the baby's feet and made her laugh. 我胳肢孩子的脚，使她发笑。

18 humble   

adj.谦卑的，恭顺的；地位低下的；v.降低，贬低

参考例句：

• In my humble opinion,he will win the election.依我拙见，他将在选举中获胜。
• Defeat and failure make people humble.挫折与失败会使人谦卑。

19 vouchsafed   

v.给予，赐予( vouchsafe的过去式和过去分词 )；允诺

参考例句：

• He vouchsafed to me certain family secrets. 他让我知道了某些家庭秘密。
• The significance of the event does, indeed, seem vouchsafed. 这个事件看起来确实具有重大意义。 来自辞典例句

20 situated   

adj.坐落在...的，处于某种境地的

参考例句：

• The village is situated at the margin of a forest.村子位于森林的边缘。
• She is awkwardly situated.她的处境困难。

21 thither   

adv.向那里；adj.在那边的，对岸的

参考例句：

• He wandered hither and thither looking for a playmate.他逛来逛去找玩伴。
• He tramped hither and thither.他到处流浪。

22 anthems   

n.赞美诗( anthem的名词复数 )；圣歌；赞歌；颂歌

参考例句：

• They usually play the national anthems of the teams at the beginning of a big match. 在大型赛事开始前，他们通常演奏参赛国国歌。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Rise please, rise for the anthems of & . 请全体起立，奏和两国国歌。 来自互联网

23 anthem   

n.圣歌，赞美诗，颂歌

参考例句：

• All those present were standing solemnly when the national anthem was played.奏国歌时全场肃立。
• As he stood on the winner's rostrum,he sang the words of the national anthem.他站在冠军领奖台上，唱起了国歌。

24 standing   

n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的

参考例句：

• After the earthquake only a few houses were left standing.地震过后只有几幢房屋还立着。
• They're standing out against any change in the law.他们坚决反对对法律做任何修改。

25 rigidly   

adv.刻板地，僵化地

参考例句：

• Life today is rigidly compartmentalized into work and leisure. 当今的生活被严格划分为工作和休闲两部分。
• The curriculum is rigidly prescribed from an early age. 自儿童时起即已开始有严格的课程设置。

26 instructor   

n.指导者，教员，教练

参考例句：

• The college jumped him from instructor to full professor.大学突然把他从讲师提升为正教授。
• The skiing instructor was a tall,sunburnt man.滑雪教练是一个高高个子晒得黑黑的男子。

27 bosom   

n.胸，胸部；胸怀；内心；adj.亲密的

参考例句：

• She drew a little book from her bosom.她从怀里取出一本小册子。
• A dark jealousy stirred in his bosom.他内心生出一阵恶毒的嫉妒。

28 wailed   

v.哭叫，哀号( wail的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• She wailed over her father's remains. 她对着父亲的遗体嚎啕大哭。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
• The women of the town wailed over the war victims. 城里的妇女为战争的死难者们痛哭。 来自辞典例句

29 heartily   

adv.衷心地，诚恳地，十分，很

参考例句：

• He ate heartily and went out to look for his horse.他痛快地吃了一顿，就出去找他的马。
• The host seized my hand and shook it heartily.主人抓住我的手，热情地和我握手。

30 allied   

adj.协约国的；同盟国的

参考例句：

• Britain was allied with the United States many times in history.历史上英国曾多次与美国结盟。
• Allied forces sustained heavy losses in the first few weeks of the campaign.同盟国在最初几周内遭受了巨大的损失。