They were burying that flesh which had been Julia Cavendish among the cypresses1 of the South London cemetery2 whither she brought back the flesh which had been Ronnie's father when Ronnie was still a lad.
To all save three of the mourners it appeared as though death had conquered scandal, as though their every personal enmity were being laid to rest. But to James Wilberforce, standing3 at the brink4 of the grave, it appeared that he stood on the brink of a scandal so tremendous that nothing except the combined brains of Wilberforce, Wilberforce & Cartwright could prevent a social catastrophe5, a regular holocaust6 of public reputations; his own, possibly, and Mollie's of a certainty, included.
Covertly7, James Wilberforce looked at the semicircle of facts gathered round the white-surpliced clergyman. All Julia's family--Benthams, Edwardses, Robinsons; all her literary friends--Paul Flower, Dot Fancourt, Jack8 Coole, Robert Backwell, the Binneys; most of her many acquaintances among the various circles with which she had been intimate, were there to do her the last honor.
A little aloof9 stood the reporters; and at them James Wilberforce looked, too. "God knows what the newspapers won't say if this thing isn't hushed up," thought Jimmy.
The letter of the dead, those four handwritten sheets in their bulky envelope which Mrs. Sanderson had handed to him immediately on his arrival at Daffadillies, burned the solicitor11's pocket. He thought how cleverly, yet how unwisely "the old lady's" plans had been laid; how, by adding a certain codicil12 to her will, she had made it virtually impossible for her executors to save the situation.
The clergyman was reading. "Man that is born of woman," read the clergyman, "hath but a short time to live, and is full of misery13." "O holy and most merciful Savior, deliver us not into the bitter pains of eternal death."
Jimmy's thoughts wandered. "I wonder if I ought to tell Mollie," he thought. "I wonder if we ought to get married at once. I wonder how the devil we're going to break things to Mollie's sister. I wonder Mollie's sister didn't come to the funeral. Better not, I suppose."
The coffin14 on its canvas slings15 sank from sight into the moss-lined grave. It touched the bottom of the grave; and the slings relaxed.
"Forasmuch as it hath pleased Almighty16 God of His great mercy," read the clergyman, as Ronnie sprinkled a handful of earth on the coffin-lid. "From henceforth blessed are the dead which die in the Lord; even so saith the Spirit; for they rest from their labors17."
James Wilberforce's mind came back to the ceremony. He looked at his friend. "Poor Ronnie," he mused18, "his labors are only just begun." And so musing19, Jimmy's gaze fell on a bearded man with an old-fashioned top-hat in his hand, who held himself very erect20 and a little apart from the remainder of the mourners.
"Rather sporting of Rear-Admiral Billy B. to turn up," thought James Wilberforce.
2
The funeral service was over. The clergyman, his surplice crinkling in the October wind, had returned to the chapel21. By twos and threes the mourners were deserting the graveside. Ahead of them, unrecognized except by Wilberforce, went Rear-Admiral Billy, his head high, his heart troubled. Soon--felt the admiral--a parson and mourners would gather for him, for an old man who would have to face his God with a promise unfulfilled, with a duty unaccomplished.
The last of the mourners disappeared through the cemetery fates to their conveyances23, leaving only Ronnie, Sir Peter, James Wilberforce and the sexton by the grave.
"We'd better take him back to Bruton Street with us," whispered Sir Peter to his son. "The less we delay things, at the present juncture----"
"Ronald, old chap"--Jimmy put a hand on his friend's shoulder,--"pater says he'll drive you home in our car. We've got to get this matter settled, and the sooner we come to some decision----"
"Very well." Ronnie, his face a purposeful mask, turned away from the scarred earth. "The mater's dead," he thought. "Dead. It's my duty to do as she would have done had she lived."
And while the three of them made their way slowly to Sir Peter's Daimler, he fell to resenting that Aliette had effaced24 herself from Julia's funeral. His mother had wished that he and Aliette should face the world together. His mother's wishes must be carried out, carried out faithfully.
3
Arrived at Bruton Street, Ronnie led his self-invited guests into the little box of a work-room; and, facing the pair of them from across his mother's Empire desk, said provocatively25: "Sir Peter, it's no use. I've made up my mind. As I told Jimmy when he showed me the will, my mother's wishes must be carried out."
"But what were your mother's wishes?" The white-haired, white-mustached old gentleman who had steered27 so many social ships clear of the rocks, smiled benignly28. "What were your mother's real wishes? Naturally, both my son and I recognize her object. But, much as we appreciate the filial devotion which prompts you to carry out her exact wishes, we have to consider the spirit of those wishes. Now suppose, mind you I'm only supposing, that we publish this book. The publication, as you yourself must be the first to admit, may defeat the very object your mother had in mind when she wrote it. Moreover, quite apart from the expense to the estate----"
"But the expense is provided for, pater," interrupted Jimmy. "And in view of the testator's letter to me----"
"That letter leaves the ultimate decision with us." Sir Peter, who loathed29 interruptions, shot an irritated glance at his son. "If we decide that this book should not see the light of day----"
"I'll never consent to that." Ronnie's voice was the voice of a fanatic30. "And besides, even if the book were not published, there's always the codicil."
"Admitted." Sir Peter frowned. "The codicil is the difficulty. I wonder if you'd mind reading it to me again, Jimmy."
Jimmy got up, fumbled31 in the pocket of his overcoat, drew out a bulky document, unfolded it, and began to read, very slowly, the paragraph appended in Julia Cavendish's own handwriting to the last page:
I empower and charge my executors, Ronald Cavendish and Sir Peter Wilberforce, to devote any sum they may think fit, up to ten thousand pounds, for the purpose of having published my book entitled, "Man's Law," and more particularly for indemnifying the publishers of the same against any libel action which may be brought against them by Hector Brunton, K.C. And I further instruct my executors to invest the sum of twenty thousand pounds for the benefit of Aliette, née Fullerford, at present the wife of Hector Brunton, K.C. The said sum to become the absolute property of Aliette Brunton so soon as her legal husband, either by his death or by the process of divorce, sets her free to marry my son, Ronald Cavendish.
"Rather vague," commented Sir Peter. "Is it properly witnessed?"
"Yes." James Wilberforce laid the will on the desk, and stared ruminatively32 at his father. His father stared back at Jimmy. Both knew how impossible it would be to contest that codicil without the publicity33 of the courts. Both knew how fatal any publicity would be to their client.
But their client only laughed. "You see, Sir Peter, there's no way out. Even if I consented not to publish the book, this will has to be proved."
"Exactly." Ronald's mouth shut like the teeth of a pike. His eyes, in their resolution, were his mother's own. "Exactly."
Sir Peter, hitherto blandness34 itself, grew irritable35. "You don't appear to realize, Cavendish, that the proving of this will means a terrific scandal."
"I realize that perfectly36, Sir Peter. But scandal--as I see it--is the only way to effect my mother's object."
"All the same, I should not be doing my duty, either as your mother's friend or as your co-trustee, if I did not ask you before we come to any decision, to consider, first, the effect such a scandal would have on your career, and secondly37, the effect it would have"--purposely the baronet paused--"on the reputation of the lady in the case."
"As far as the lady in the case is concerned," Ronnie's fingers rapped the desk-top, "her freedom is the paramount38 consideration."
"Is that the lady's view, or your own?" Sir Peter, seeing an ivory paper-knife near at hand, drew it quietly toward him.
"My own."
At that, Jimmy, who had been watching his friend carefully, rose and began to stride slowly up and down the little room. Quite apart from the personal issue (if the worst came to the worst, he and Mollie would have to be married by special license39 before the crash came!), it seemed to Jimmy that his friend must be saved, somehow or other, from the consequences of his own obstinacy40. But how--how in the name of the law--could that saving be accomplished22?
"And if the lady disapproves41?" said Sir Peter.
"She will not disapprove," countered Ronnie.
In the pause which followed, Jimmy drew out Julia Cavendish's letter, and read it for the tenth time.
If I have brought any happiness into your life by bringing you and the woman you are going to marry together, help me to bring happiness into my son's life and into the life of the woman whom he is not able to marry. I feel that I have taken the best, the only way to put things right for Ronnie; but if there is any other method by which my main object, the object of forcing Hector Brunton to set his wife free, is possible of achievement, by all means explore it.
"Don't you think"--James Wilberforce put the letter back in his pocket and turned to Ronnie, who was eying his father in positive hostility42--"that it might be advisable to discuss this matter with--Hector Brunton?"
"I won't have that. I'll be damned if I'll have that."
Ronnie's answer was openly provocative26; but Sir Peter apparently43 had recovered his temper. "We mustn't be hasty," purred Sir Peter. "We mustn't be overhasty. As Julia Cavendish's executors, we have to regard the spirit rather than the letter of her instructions. Believe me, the immediate publication of that codicil would be fatal to the plans which your dear mother obviously had in mind. Fatal!"
And the baronet, lighting44 himself a cigarette, relapsed into thought. Privately45 he considered that his old friend must have been mentally deranged46 some time before her death. Yet he dared not say so to her son; and, moreover, to prove mental derangement47 would entail48 more publicity than to prove the will itself.
Various plans for the avoidance of publicity began to pass through Sir Peter's mind. Brunton, faced with the alternative of the book's being published, might consent to file his petition for divorce. Then, Julia's main object accomplished, the book might be--accidentally destroyed. Other methods, too--gentler methods--might be adopted with the book. But what in Hades was one to do about the will? Unfortunately, tampering49 with wills constituted a felony. Therefore, unless some one ("And whom could I get to do it!" mused Sir Peter) risked going to jail, that will, that deadly, damning, white-faced, blue-written testament50 on the desk would have to be filed in toto at Somerset House. Filed, every pressman in England would seize upon it for a column.
A knock, followed by a voice asking, "May I come in, Ronnie?" brought the three men to their feet; and, before any of them could answer, the door opened, revealing "the lady in the case."
"I'm so sorry if I'm interrupting," she said. "I thought you'd gone, Sir Peter. I'll go away if you're talking business."
"We are talking business, dear lady," purred the baronet, playing with his acquired paper-knife. "Business which affects you more than anybody." And he looked at Ronnie as though to say, "Surely you'll consent to my consulting the person most concerned."
Ronnie signaled acquiescence54; Jimmy closed the door; Aliette sat down; and Sir Peter began to speak.
At first Aliette could not grasp what the baronet was talking about. For three days now, her mind, still numb55 from the shock of Julia's sudden passing, had been obsessed56 by its own problems. Ronnie, she knew, was keeping some secret from her--as she from him. His secret, she guessed vaguely57, must be in connection with his mother's book. Hers----
Gradually Sir Peter's words became comprehensible. He was reading Julia Cavendish's will. In so far as Aliette could understand the peculiar58 legal phraseology, Julia Cavendish had left everything to Ronnie. It struck her as curious that Sir Peter should go to all that trouble. Curious, too, that both Ronnie and his friend should look so worried! Ronnie would be even more worried if he knew that----
"That is the will," Sir Peter's voice interrupted the disturbing thought, "as my firm drafted it some years ago. But that will has been altered. Perhaps, before I read the alteration59, I'd better explain to you about the book."
Now Aliette grew conscious of a question in her lover's eyes. The eyes never left her face. James Wilberforce, too, was eying her in a way that she could not understand. And suddenly Ronnie laid a hand upon her shoulder.
Sir Peter went on; "As you probably know, Mrs. Cavendish finished a novel just before she died. I have not yet read the manuscript of that novel, but it appears, from what my son and your--er--husband, who have read it, tell me, that the book is a roman à clef. A roman à clef, as I need hardly explain to you, dealing60, as it does, with living people, sometimes results in a libel action. It is, among other things, to provide against the possibility of such a libel action that Mrs. Cavendish, without my firm's knowledge, altered her will."
"A libel action, Sir Peter?" Aliette's question was automatic.
"Yes. A libel action." The baronet picked his every word with care. "A libel action which might be brought against Mrs. Cavendish's estate and against the publishers of her book by your--er--former husband."
"Brought by Hector!" The exclamation61, low and immediately suppressed, barely escaped Aliette's lips. But her shoulder trembled under Ronnie's hand; for now, in one inspired moment, she had grasped the secret of the book. Memory, casting back, recalled and understood every personal question put to her by the dead.
Sir Peter had stopped speaking. His eyes under the gold-rimmed glasses were perturbed62, yet kindly63. Obviously he found the situation difficult. She waited for Ronnie or James to intervene; but they, too, remained dumb.
And, "Do I understand," asked Aliette, summoning up all her courage, "that this novel is a personal story--the story of my"--her whole body quivered--"matrimonial difficulties?"
Ronnie removed his hand from her shoulder. James nodded assent64. Admiration65 and gratitude66 mingled67 in Sir Peter's: "You've defined the matter exactly. One of the questions on which I should like your views is," the careful words paused, "whether or no this book should be published."
Fleetingly68, Aliette thought, "Shall I tell them ... about myself? Does it make any difference?" Her intuition, suddenly active, remembered two hints dropped--purposefully perhaps--by Ronnie's mother. "Public judgment69 is usually inaccurate70 because the public is not told the whole truth"; "My dear, if only the whole world realized, as I realize, your story, they would not misjudge you."
"My views----" she parried aloud, playing for time.
"Publicity," she thought. "The flaunting71 policy once more. Dear God, that too." And, revisualizing the ordeal72 at Patrick O'Riordan's first night, her nerve frayed73. Why couldn't these three men leave her in peace--in peace? Looking at Ronnie, she saw his eyes very resolute52. He said:
"My decision is that the book must be published."
"Please let me finish, Cavendish," broke in Sir Peter; and to Aliette: "There are other points besides the publication of this book to be decided74." Then he read to her, always in the same soft purr, the codicil; and explained, in tense, reasoned sentences, the consequences of its publication in the press, ending: "It means, to use a rather old-fashioned phrase, social ruin."
For a long while Aliette sat silent, her eyes wide, her pale hands clutching the black folds of her dress. Womanlike, she tried to put herself into the mind of the dead. Why had Julia Cavendish done this thing? Why? Could Julia have guessed that---- Womanlike, Aliette looked into the future, and her cheeks grew hot.
Ronnie said: "He can't bring an action for libel without bringing one for divorce"; Sir Peter, "Let's stick to our point; the publication of this codicil means disaster--for all three of you." "It means Aliette's freedom," retorted Ronnie.
The words of the codicil stood out in fire on the screen of Aliette's mind. She saw those words published, saw the book published, saw scandal follow scandal. Sir Peter was right. This thing meant ruin, social ruin for herself, for Ronnie, for Hector. And yet, and yet--it meant freedom. But would freedom come in time?
She glanced at the three men: at Ronnie and James, on their feet, motionless; at Sir Peter, seated at the desk, his hand fidgeting the ivory paper-knife. Swiftly, as a shuttle through the warp75, her mind threaded the skeins of the future. The future would hold more than Ronnie.
"Before you take any decision," Jimmy spoke76, "read this." He laid a letter before her. She read the letter through twice, her mind fighting for self-control, before asking:
"And is there no other method by which Mrs. Cavendish's 'main object' can be achieved, Sir Peter?"
Sir Peter's hand ceased fidgeting at the knife. "There may be a way," he said doubtfully. "But whether we can take it or not depends on your--er--former husband."
Blazing, Ronnie intervened. "Once and for all, I'll have no favors from that--that blackguard. He's made his own bed. Let him lie in it. Who the devil cares about scandal nowadays? I don't. And if Brunton does, so much the worse for him."
But the baronet's next remark shattered heroics. "I think," said the baronet sarcastically77, "that as my co-executor is getting so very excited, we had better adjourn78 our conference. Perhaps you'll let me know what you both decide."
4
Late that same evening, Aliette and her lover sat alone in the familiar drawing-room among the familiar things--the jade79 idols80, the Toby mugs, the Spanish velvets, and the Venetian brocades which Julia Cavendish had collected for her delight. Ever since their hasty dinner--most of the staff were still at Daffadillies--Ronnie had been urging her decision. Ever since dinner, haggard, she had been playing for time.
"It was my mother's wish," he said. "Let's prove the will; publish the book; take the consequences. Anything's worth while--if only he'll divorce you."
"Is it?" Dully, the woman's mind was looking for a loophole. "Is it worth while to ruin three lives?"
"Three?"
"Yes, dear. Yours--and mine ... and--and Hector's,"
"Hector!" The rage in Ronnie's voice terrified her, as it had been terrifying her all the evening. "We needn't consider him. He hasn't considered us. There would have been no need for all this if he'd been reasonable; if he'd brought his action for divorce when I asked him to."
"There are others we ought to consider, too." Aliette's hand, as she fondled her lover's rigid81 arm, was tremulous. "Mollie, James, my parents. They'll all suffer if you--if we carry this thing through."
"They must look after themselves. They've done nothing to help us. Don't let's discuss the matter further. Believe me, it's the only way to get what we want."
"But Sir Peter said----"
"Sir Peter's only a solicitor. Even if that blackguard did file his petition, the will and the book would have to be published."
"I'm not bitter. Only just. He had no mercy on Lucy Towers. I'll have none on him."
Aliette's hands ceased their fondling. For a little while she sat silent, unmoving among the deep cushions. Her mind, busied so long, could function no longer. She felt her womanliness naked--flesh quivering under the lash83. She wanted to say to him: 'Ronnie, there's something--something you don't know.' But suddenly her courage--the courage which had carried her, carried them both, through the hard-run months--broke. She began to sob84. Like a broken soul she sobbed--sobbed to herself, faintly, feebly; careless--as Lucy Towers had been careless--of the man who strove to comfort her. Words came, feebly, through the sobs85:
"Man, I meant to make you so happy. I meant to make everybody happy. But I've failed--failed. I'm not blaming you. I'm not blaming your mother. You and your mother have done everything. Everything. It's only I who have been useless--useless. And I meant, heaven only knows how much I meant, to be of use. Before I ran away with you I reasoned it all out. I thought that I was doing right. There didn't seem to be any one else to consider except you and me." She broke off. Then, almost fiercely, she asked him: "Tell me I've been a little bit of use? Tell me I've made you happy--just sometimes----"
"Of course you've made me happy." He tried to take her hands; but her hands shrank from him.
"I don't believe it You're only saying that to comfort me."
"I'm not."
"You are." Hysteria took her by the throat. "You hate me. If you don't hate me--you ought to. I killed your mother." She broke off again, sobbing86.
"Alie"--the tone told her that he thought her crazy--"what's the matter with you? Nothing could have saved Julia. Sir Heron told me."
"Sir Heron wouldn't tell you. Nobody would tell you anything. You're only a man. All men are the same. You're only thinking about yourself. You're not thinking about me. You only want your revenge on--on Hector. Why shouldn't you have your revenge?"
Suddenly, her sobbing ceased; and she faced him--this Aliette he could not understand--dry-eyed and venomous.
"Have your revenge on him if you want to. But don't pretend you're being just. Don't pretend you're being heroic. Don't pretend you're any better than he is. You're not. He's a man, just the same as you are. You talk about my freedom. You say scandal doesn't matter. Perhaps it doesn't--to a man. Perhaps it oughtn't to matter to me, I've belonged to two----"
At that, for the first and last time in their lives, Aliette was physically87 afraid of her lover. His arms, which had been seeking to comfort, abandoned her. He sprang to his feet. Jealousy88, a red and angry aura of jealousy, exuded89 from him.
"Christ!" he burst out, "Christ! You needn't remind me of that."
Speech died at his lips. Furiously he strode from her--strode up and down the familiar room, the room in which, months since, she had given her unspoken promise to Julia Cavendish. The scene came back to her now. She thought, "What have I been saying? Dear God, what have I been saying?" Hysteria went out of her, as fever goes out, leaving her weak, nerveless.
"Damn it!" he was muttering, "damn it! Do you think I ever forget that once--once----"
She wanted to cry out to him, "I didn't mean to hurt you. You're hurting me now, hurting me beyond all bearing." But she knew that, hurt, she dared not cry out; knew that this was the hardest of the path, the full price, the full torment90 exacted.
Sitting there, rigid, uncomplaining, teeth bit to the under lip lest the mouth should cry out its torture, she remembered the long years with Hector, the mornings and the evenings when, facing him over the breakfast-table or the dinner-table, listening after dinner to his voice in the library, tolerating--for the sake of the dream which this other man had made true--the ungentle fury of his caresses91, she had learned to wear the mask which so many married women wear, the mask of compliance92.
Must she, for Ronnie's sake, still wear the mask? Daren't she tell him--the truth? Wouldn't he--knowing the truth--flinch from his purpose? Wasn't it worth while, more than worth while, to keep silence till the die was cast? Couldn't she still play for time? Time! There might be some way--some other way to freedom. If only she weren't so afraid--so strangely and newly afraid! If only Ronnie were not so angry!
And suddenly she knew that Ronnie's anger had left him. His feet stopped in mid-stride. Slowly he came across the room toward her; and she could see a little of the old understanding tenderness in his blue eyes. "Alie," he said, "forgive me."
"What is there to forgive?" Her voice sounded listless, broken. "It was my fault. I oughtn't to have spoken as I did. I called up the past. I had no right to call up the past. The past's dead. There's only the future----"
"Our future." He was on his knees to her now; and dumbly she put out her hands to him; dumbly she fondled his temples. Once more she wanted to cry; but no tears came. Her tongue felt parched93, as though by some bitter fruit. "It wasn't your fault, Alie. You're tired. And perhaps I'm not being just. Perhaps I do want my revenge. But it's only for your sake"--his hands sought her shoulders--"only for your sake that I hate him. I think, I know, that if he'd made you happy, if he'd been kind to you, I could bear the thought of him. But he made you miserable94. He hurt you. He's hurting you now. When I think of that, I go mad; mad with hatred95."
She leaned forward; and words came to her. "You mustn't hate him. We mustn't either of us hate him. We're as much to blame as he is. At least, I am. I'm a rotten woman. Rotten."
"You're not. You 're the best woman in the world." Still on his knees to her by the sofa, he pressed her to him--gently, with that gentleness which had first won her heart. And desperately96 her heart wanted to tell him everything. But tears, tears of sheer weakness, choked her once more.
"Don't cry, darling. Please don't cry." Conscience-wrung, Ronnie could find no other words. The sense of his responsibility, of that awful responsibility for another's happiness, which only illegal lovers know, coiled--tighter than her arms; tighter than any hempen97 rope--round his neck. Her tears on his cheeks were as warm rain conjuring98 up the seedlings99 of remembrance. He recollected100 all the miracle of their early love for one another, all their resistances and their yieldings, all the weeks and all the months through which they had faced the herd's hostility in mutual101 loyalty102, setting love above the law, trusting in one another--he in her as she in him--for faith. Always they had kept faith with one another. Yet always she, the woman, had borne the heavier burden. And in his ignorance he thought: "That's why I must insist--insist on this thing going through."
Then a voice, as it were his mother's, whispered to the mind of Ronald Cavendish: "Comfort her, Ronnie, comfort her. Before you ask this last sacrifice, tell her that the past has not been in vain"; and then, leaning on her lover, her eyes tear-blinded, her hands slack, her limbs relaxed in misery, Aliette heard him whisper:
"Darling woman. Darling girl. You're not to think that I don't understand. I do understand--everything." Like waves, the deeps of his fondness poured from him, poured over her, healing her wounds; and for a moment she thought that he had guessed the truth.
But his next words dispelled103 illusion. "I know all that you've given up for my sake; all that I've made you give. The blame, if blame there be, is mine. You've sacrificed yourself for me."
"It's no sacrifice." Hardly, she stirred in his arms. "I've never regretted----"
"Nor I, dear. Nor I. I've never regretted for one single instant. I never shall regret. Ever since that first day I saw you, you've been all the world to me. All the world. That's why I want you to be strong, not to be afraid of scandal, to let me do as my mother wished."
"Ronnie"--her eyes, wet with tears, sought his,--"have you counted the cost?"
"Yes." He released her; and she saw, as he rose up, that he was still resolute. "I've counted the cost. And it'll be heavy--heavier than anything we've had to bear yet. But it'll be worth while, Alie. Anything's worth while--if only I can win you your freedom."
"But your career----"
"My career doesn't matter any more. I've had success. I know how little it's worth. Nothing matters to me now except your happiness."
"My happiness?" Wistfully she looked down at her pale hands.
"Yes, your happiness. Oh, my dear, don't think I haven't realized, all these months, that you'll never be happy--really and truly happy--while you belong, legally, to that man."
"Ronnie"--she was trying, trying to tell him--"I have been happy. Always. It isn't that----"
"Yes, it is." He was afraid lest, pleading again, she should weaken his decision. "It's only that. Once you're my wife, you'll forget all the unhappy times."
"Shall I?" she thought. "Will that little ceremony make me forget that once, once I was Hector's?"
"That's why I want you to make up your mind," went on Ronnie. "Now. To-night. That's why I didn't want you to listen to Sir Peter. Alie, it isn't for my revenge I'm asking you to let me do this. It's for your own sake. If you were a different sort of woman, a rotten woman, perhaps it wouldn't matter so much--our not being married. But you--you can't go on forever like this. Just think, darling, just think what it would mean if we were to have children."
"Children," she repeated dully, "children." And then, his very vehemence104 terrifying her again, "Oh, Ronnie, Ronnie--don't ask me to decide to-night."
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cypresses
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| n.柏属植物，柏树( cypress的名词复数 ) | |
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cemetery
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standing
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brink
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catastrophe
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holocaust
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covertly
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jack
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| n.插座，千斤顶，男人；v.抬起，提醒，扛举；n.（Jake）杰克 | |
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aloof
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immediate
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solicitor
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codicil
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| n.遗嘱的附录 | |
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misery
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| n.痛苦，苦恼，苦难；悲惨的境遇，贫苦 | |
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coffin
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| n.棺材，灵柩 | |
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slings
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| 抛( sling的第三人称单数 )； 吊挂； 遣送； 押往 | |
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almighty
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| adj.全能的，万能的；很大的，很强的 | |
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labors
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| v.努力争取(for)( labor的第三人称单数 )；苦干；详细分析；（指引擎）缓慢而困难地运转 | |
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18
mused
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| v.沉思，冥想( muse的过去式和过去分词 )；沉思自语说（某事） | |
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musing
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| n. 沉思，冥想 adj. 沉思的, 冥想的 动词muse的现在分词形式 | |
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erect
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| n./v.树立，建立，使竖立；adj.直立的，垂直的 | |
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21
chapel
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| n.小教堂，殡仪馆 | |
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22
accomplished
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| adj.有才艺的；有造诣的；达到了的 | |
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23
conveyances
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| n.传送( conveyance的名词复数 )；运送；表达；运输工具 | |
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24
effaced
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| v.擦掉( efface的过去式和过去分词 )；抹去；超越；使黯然失色 | |
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25
provocatively
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provocative
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| adj.挑衅的，煽动的，刺激的，挑逗的 | |
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steered
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| v.驾驶( steer的过去式和过去分词 )；操纵；控制；引导 | |
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28
benignly
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| adv.仁慈地，亲切地 | |
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loathed
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| v.憎恨，厌恶( loathe的过去式和过去分词 )；极不喜欢 | |
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30
fanatic
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| n.狂热者，入迷者；adj.狂热入迷的 | |
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31
fumbled
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| （笨拙地）摸索或处理（某事物）( fumble的过去式和过去分词 )； 乱摸，笨拙地弄； 使落下 | |
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ruminatively
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| adv.沉思默想地，反复思考地 | |
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33
publicity
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| n.众所周知，闻名；宣传，广告 | |
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34
blandness
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| n.温柔，爽快 | |
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35
irritable
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| adj.急躁的；过敏的；易怒的 | |
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36
perfectly
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| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
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37
secondly
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| adv.第二，其次 | |
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38
paramount
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| a.最重要的，最高权力的 | |
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39
license
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| n.执照，许可证，特许；v.许可，特许 | |
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obstinacy
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| n.顽固；（病痛等）难治 | |
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41
disapproves
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| v.不赞成( disapprove的第三人称单数 ) | |
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42
hostility
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| n.敌对，敌意；抵制［pl.］交战，战争 | |
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43
apparently
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| adv.显然地；表面上，似乎 | |
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44
lighting
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| n.照明，光线的明暗，舞台灯光 | |
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45
privately
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| adv.以私人的身份，悄悄地，私下地 | |
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46
deranged
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| adj.疯狂的 | |
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derangement
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| n.精神错乱 | |
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48
entail
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| vt.使承担，使成为必要，需要 | |
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tampering
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| v.窜改( tamper的现在分词 )；篡改；（用不正当手段）影响；瞎摆弄 | |
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testament
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| n.遗嘱；证明 | |
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51
irresolute
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| adj.无决断的，优柔寡断的，踌躇不定的 | |
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52
resolute
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| adj.坚决的，果敢的 | |
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53
doorway
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| n.门口，(喻)入门；门路，途径 | |
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54
acquiescence
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| n.默许；顺从 | |
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55
numb
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| adj.麻木的，失去感觉的；v.使麻木 | |
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obsessed
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| adj.心神不宁的,鬼迷心窍的,沉迷的 | |
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vaguely
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| adv.含糊地，暖昧地 | |
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58
peculiar
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| adj.古怪的，异常的；特殊的，特有的 | |
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59
alteration
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| n.变更，改变；蚀变 | |
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60
dealing
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| n.经商方法，待人态度 | |
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61
exclamation
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| n.感叹号，惊呼，惊叹词 | |
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62
perturbed
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| adj.烦燥不安的v.使（某人）烦恼，不安( perturb的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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kindly
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| adj.和蔼的，温和的，爽快的；adv.温和地，亲切地 | |
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64
assent
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| v.批准，认可；n.批准，认可 | |
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65
admiration
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| n.钦佩，赞美，羡慕 | |
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66
gratitude
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| adj.感激，感谢 | |
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67
mingled
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| 混合，混入( mingle的过去式和过去分词 )； 混进，与…交往[联系] | |
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68
fleetingly
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| adv.飞快地，疾驰地 | |
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69
judgment
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| n.审判；判断力，识别力，看法，意见 | |
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70
inaccurate
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| adj.错误的，不正确的，不准确的 | |
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71
flaunting
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| adj.招摇的，扬扬得意的，夸耀的v.炫耀，夸耀( flaunt的现在分词 )；有什么能耐就施展出来 | |
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72
ordeal
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| n.苦难经历，（尤指对品格、耐力的）严峻考验 | |
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73
frayed
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| adj.磨损的v.（使布、绳等）磨损，磨破( fray的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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74
decided
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| adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的 | |
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75
warp
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| vt.弄歪，使翘曲，使不正常，歪曲，使有偏见 | |
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76
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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77
sarcastically
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| adv.挖苦地，讽刺地 | |
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78
adjourn
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| v.（使）休会，（使）休庭 | |
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79
jade
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| n.玉石；碧玉；翡翠 | |
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80
idols
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| 偶像( idol的名词复数 )； 受崇拜的人或物； 受到热爱和崇拜的人或物； 神像 | |
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81
rigid
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| adj.严格的，死板的；刚硬的，僵硬的 | |
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82
suffused
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| v.（指颜色、水气等）弥漫于，布满( suffuse的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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83
lash
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| v.系牢；鞭打；猛烈抨击；n.鞭打；眼睫毛 | |
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84
sob
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| n.空间轨道的轰炸机；呜咽，哭泣 | |
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85
sobs
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| 啜泣（声），呜咽（声）( sob的名词复数 ) | |
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86
sobbing
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| <主方>Ⅰ adj.湿透的 | |
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87
physically
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| adj.物质上，体格上，身体上，按自然规律 | |
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88
jealousy
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| n.妒忌，嫉妒，猜忌 | |
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89
exuded
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| v.缓慢流出，渗出，分泌出( exude的过去式和过去分词 )；流露出对（某物）的神态或感情 | |
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90
torment
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| n.折磨；令人痛苦的东西(人)；vt.折磨；纠缠 | |
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caresses
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| 爱抚，抚摸( caress的名词复数 ) | |
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92
compliance
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| n.顺从；服从；附和；屈从 | |
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93
parched
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| adj.焦干的；极渴的；v.（使）焦干 | |
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94
miserable
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| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
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95
hatred
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| n.憎恶，憎恨，仇恨 | |
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96
desperately
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| adv.极度渴望地，绝望地，孤注一掷地 | |
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97
hempen
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| adj. 大麻制的, 大麻的 | |
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98
conjuring
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| n.魔术 | |
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99
seedlings
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| n.刚出芽的幼苗( seedling的名词复数 ) | |
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100
recollected
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| adj.冷静的；镇定的；被回忆起的；沉思默想的v.记起，想起( recollect的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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101
mutual
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| adj.相互的，彼此的；共同的，共有的 | |
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102
loyalty
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| n.忠诚，忠心 | |
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103
dispelled
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| v.驱散，赶跑( dispel的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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104
vehemence
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| n.热切；激烈；愤怒 | |
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