The old affection, tacitly interrupted for a time, when Madeleine had felt the unexpressed opposition12 of her brother to Chudleigh Wilmot, had been as tacitly restored between them since Madeleine's marriage. She had felt during that sad interval13, all whose sadness was hidden and unspoken, never taking an external shape, but formless, like a sorrow in a dream, that circumstances and her surroundings were stronger than she was; she had felt somewhat like a prisoner, against and for whom conspiracies15 were formed, but who had no power to meddle16 in them, and no distinct knowledge of their methods or objects. Mrs. M'Diarmid, she vaguely17 felt, was for her, in the secret desire of her heart; her brother against her. Ronald would have been successful in any case, she had been quite sure, even if he had not been at once justified18 and relieved of all apprehensions19 by Wilmot's departure. Hedid not care for her--he had gone away; they might each and all have spared the pains they had taken--their bugbear had been only a myth. Then Madeleine, in whose mind justice had a high place, turned again to her brother as tacitly, as completely, without explanation, as she had turned from him, and loved him, admired him, thought about him, and clung to him as she had been wont20 to do. Which surprised Ronald Kilsyth, who had taken it for granted that Madeleine, who had married Ramsay Caird a good deal to the Captain's surprise--who had his theories concerning affinities21 and analogies, into which this alliance by no means fitted--but not at all to his displeasure, would discard everybody in favour of her husband, and devote herself to him after the gushing22 fashion of very young brides in ordinary. He had smiled grimly to himself occasionally, as he wondered whether Lady Muriel would be altogether satisfied with a match which was so largely of her own bringing about, and by which, whatever advantages she had secured to her own family, for whom she entertained a truly clannish23 attachment24, she had undeniably provided herself with a young, beautiful, and ever-present rival in her own queendom of fashion and social sway. "Let them fight it out," Captain Kilsyth had thought; "it would have been pleasanter if Maddy had gone farther afield; but it cannot be helped. I am sure she is glad to get away from Lady Muriel; and I am sure Lady Muriel is glad to get rid of her. I don't understand her taking to Caird in this way; for I am as strongly convinced as ever it was no false alarm about Wilmot; she was in love with him; only," and his face reddened, "thank God, she did not know it. However, it is time wasted to wonder about women, even the best and the truest of them, and no very humiliating acknowledgment to say I cannot understand them."
But Captain Kilsyth was destined25 to find himself unable to discard reflection on his sister and her marriage after this fashion. Madeleine put all his previously26 conceived ideas to rout27, and disconcerted all his expectations. She was by no means engrossed28 by her husband; she did not assume any of the happy fussiness29 or fussy30 happiness which he had observed exhibit themselves in jeunes ménages constructed on the old-fashioned principle of love, as opposed to the modern expedient31 of convenance. She was just as friendly, just as kindly32 with Ramsay Caird as she had been in the days before their brief engagement, in the days when Ronald had found it difficult to believe that Lady Muriel's wishes and plans would ever be realised. She did not talk about her house, or give herself any of the pretty "married-woman" airs which are additional charms in brides in their teens. She led, as far as Ronald knew, much the same sort of life she had led under her stepmother's chaperonage; and Kilsyth visited her every day: Ronald too, when he was in town; and he soon felt that he was all to her he had formerly33 been. The innocent, girlish, loving heart had room and power for grief indeed, but none for a half-understood anger, none for the prolongation of an involuntary estrangement34. So the first months of Madeleine's married life were pleasant to her brother in his relations with her; and the first thing which occurred to trouble his mind in reference to her was his suspicion and dislike of certain points in Ramsay Caird's conduct Here, again, Madeleine puzzled him. Naturally, he had no sooner conceived this suspicious displeasure against the man to whom such an immense trust as that of his sister's happiness had been committed than he sought to discover by Madeleine's looks and manner whether and how far her happiness was compromised by what he observed. But he failed to discover any of the indications which he sought. Madeleine's spirits were unequal, but her disposition35 had never been precisely36 gay; and there was no trace of pique37, sullenness38, or the consciousness of offence in her manner towards her husband.
It was when Ronald's indignation against Ramsay Caird was rising fast, and he began to think Madeleine either unaccountably indifferent to certain things which women of quite as gentle a nature as hers would inevitably39 and reasonably resent, or that she was concealing40 her sentiments, in the interests of her dignity, with a degree of skill and cleverness for which he was far from having given her credit, that his sister's delicate health for the first time attracted Ronald's attention. And Mrs. M'Diarmid was the medium of the first communication on the subject which alarmed him.
As in all similar cases, attention once excited, anxiety once awakened41, the progress of both is rapid. Ronald questioned his father, questioned Lady Muriel, questioned Ramsay Caird. In each instance the result was the same. Madeleine was undoubtedly42 very delicate, and the danger of alarming her, which, as her organisation43 was highly nervous and sensitive, was considerable, presented a serious obstacle to the taking of the active measures which had become undeniably desirable.
One day Ronald went to see his sister earlier in the day than usual, having been told by Mrs. M'Diarmid that her looks in the evening were not by any paeans44 a reliable indication of the state of her health. He found her lying on a sofa in her dressing-room, wholly unoccupied, and with an expression of listless weariness in her face and figure which even his unskilled judgment45 could not avoid observing and appreciating with alarm.
One hand was under her head, the other hung listlessly down; and as Ronald drew near, and took it in his tenderly, he saw how thin the fingers were, how blue the veins46, how they marked their course too strongly under the white skin, and how the rose-tint was gone. As he took the gentle hand, he felt that it was cold; but it burned in his clasp before he had held it a minute. Like all men of his stamp, Ronald Kilsyth, when he was touched, was deeply touched; when his mood was tender, it was very tender. Madeleine looked at him; and the love and sadness in her smile pierced at once his well-defended heart.
"What's this I hear, Maddy, about your not being well?" he said, as he seated himself beside her sofa, and kissed her forehead--it was slightly damp, he felt, and she touched it with her handkerchief frequently while he stayed. "You were not complaining last week, when I saw you last; and now I've just come up to town, and been to Brook-street, I find my father and my lady quite full of your not being well. What is it all, Maddy? what are you suffering from, and why have you said nothing about it?"
"I am not very ill, Ronald," said Madeleine, raising herself, and propping47 herself up on her cushions by leaning on her elbow, one hand under her head, its fingers in her golden hair; more profuse48 and beautiful than ever Ronald thought the hair was. "I am really not a bit worse than I have been; only I suddenly felt a few days ago that I could not go on making efforts, and going out, and seeing people, and all that kind of thing, any longer; and then papa got uneasy about me. I assure you that is the only difference; and you know it does grow horribly tiresome49, dear, don't you? At least you don't know, because you never would do it; and you were right; but I--I hadn't much else to do, and it does not do to seem peculiar50; and I went on as long as I could. But this last week was really too much for me, and I had to tell Lady Muriel I must be quiet; and so I have been quiet, lying here."
She gave her brother this simple explanation, her blue eyes looking at him with a smile, and a tone in her voice as though she prayed him not to blame her.
"My poor child, my darling Maddy!" said Ronald, "to think of your trying to go on in that way, and feeling so unequal to it, and fancying alll the time you must! What a wonderful life of humbug51 and delusion52 you women lead, to be sure, either with your will or against it! Now tell me, does Ramsay know how ill you are, and how you have been doing all sorts of things which are most unfit for yon, until you are quite worn out?"
"Ramsay is very kind," said Madeleine; and then she hesitated, and the colour deepened painfully in her face; "but you know, Ronald, men are not very patient with women when they are only ailing53; if I were seriously ill; it would be quite a different thing. Re really is not in the least to blame," she went on hurriedly; "he gets bored at home, you know; and since I have not been feeling strong, it has been quite a relief to me to be alone."
"You really must not blame him," she repeated. "You know you yourself did not perceive that I was ill before you went away; and it is only within the last week, I assure you. I suppose the cough has weakened me; for some time, in the morning, I have felt giddy going downstairs, so I thought it better not to try it until I get stronger."
"I have not heard you cough much, Madeleine, that is, not more than usual, you know. You have always had a cough, more or less."
"Yes," said Madeleine simply, "ever since I was born, I believe; but it is never really bad, except in the morning, and sometimes at night. Up to this time I have got on very well in the day and the afternoon; and I like the evening best of all, if I am not too tired. I feel quite bright in the evening, especially when I take my drops."
"What drops, Maddy?"
"The drops Sir Saville Rowe ordered for me last winter," said Madeleine. "I got on very well with them, and I don't want anything else. Papa wants me to see some of the great doctors, but there's really no occasion; and I hate strangers. Dr. Whittaker comes occasionally--as Sir Saville wished--and he does well enough. The mere55 idea of seeing a stranger now--in that way--would make me nervous and miserable56." Indeed she flushed up again, looked excited and feverish57, and a violent fit of coughing came on, and interrupted any remonstrance58 on Ronald's part, which perhaps she dreaded59.
But she need not have dreaded such remonstrance. There was a consciousness in Ronald's heart which kept him silent; and besides, with every word his sister had spoken, with every instant during which his examination of her, close though furtive60, had lasted, increasing alarm had taken firmer hold of him. How had he been so blind? How had he been content to accept appearances in Madeleine's case? how had he failed to search and examine rightly into the story of this marriage, and satisfy himself that his sister's heart was in it, that she had really forgotten Wilmot? For a conviction seized upon Ronald Kilsyth, as he looked at his sister and listened to her, that had she been really happy, this state of things would not have existed. In the angry and suspicious state of his feelings towards Wilmot, he had accorded little attention, and less credence61, to his father's confidences respecting Wilmot's opinion and warnings about Madeleine's health. He was too honourable62, too true a gentleman, even in his anger to set down Wilmot as insincere, as acting63 like a charlatan64 or an alarmist; but he had dismissed the matter from his thoughts with disregard and impatience65. How awfully66, how fatally wrong he had been! And a flame of anger sprung wildly up in his heart; anger which involved equally himself and Lady Muriel.
Yes, Lady Muriel! All he had thought and done, he had thought and done at her instigation; and though, when Ronald thought the matter over calmly afterwards, as was his wont, he was unable to believe that any other course than that which had ended in the complete separation of Wilmot and Madeleine would have been possible, still he was tormented67 with this blind burning anger.
When Lady Muriel had aroused his suspicions, had awakened his fears, Wilmot was a married man; but when he had acted upon these fears and suspicions, Wilmot's wife was dead. "It might have been," then he thought. True; but would he not, being without the knowledge, the fear which now possessed him, have at any time, and under any circumstances, prevented it? It cost him a struggle now, when the knowledge and the fear had come, and his mind was full of them, to acknowledge that he would; but Ronald was essentially68 an honest man--he made the struggle and the acknowledgment. In so far he had no right to blame Lady Muriel.
In so far--but what about Ramsay Caird? How, had that marriage been brought about? How had his sister been induced to marry a man whom he now felt assured she did not lave?--something had revealed it to him, nothing she had said, nothing she had looked. How had this marriage, by which his sister had not gained in rank, wealth, or position, been brought about? (He thought at this stage of his meditations69, with a sigh, that Wilmot could even have given her wealth now--how bizarre the arrangements of fate are!) How had that been done? By Lady Muriel of course, and no other. Maddy might have remained contentedly70 enough at home, might have been suffered gradually to forget Wilmot, and enticed71 into the amusements and distractions72 natural to her age and position; there was no need for this extreme measure of inducing her to fix her fate precipitately73 by a marriage with Ramsay Caird. Yes, Lady Muriel had done it; done it to secure Madeleine's fortune to a relative of her own, and to disembarrass herself of a grown-up stepdaughter. How blind he had been, how completely he had played into her hands! Thus thought Ronald, as he strode about his bare room at Brook-street, his face haggard with care, and his heart sick with the terrible fear which had smitten74 it with his first look at Madeleine.
Ronald's interview with his sister had been long and painful to him, though nothing, or very little more, had been said on the subject of her health. He had perceived her anxiety to abridge75 discussion on that point, and had fallen in with her humour. Once or twice, as he talked with her, he had asked her if she was quite sure he was not wearying her, if she did not feel tired or inclined to sleep, if he should go, and send her maid to her. But to all his questions she replied no; she was quite comfortable, and had not felt so happy for a long time; and she had begged him to stay with her as long as he could. The brother and sister talked of numerous subjects--much of Kilsyth, and their childhood; a little of their several modes of life in the present; and sometimes the current of their talk would be broken by Madeleine's low musical laugh, but oftener by the miserable cough, from which Ronald shrunk appalled76, wondering that he ever could have heard it without alarm, with indifference77. But the truth was, he had never heard it at all. The cough had changed its character; and the significance which it had assumed, and which crept coldly with its hollow sound to Ronald's heart, was new.
Ronald had a dinner engagement for that day, and remained with his sister until it was time to go home and dress. He looked into Kilsyth's room on his way to the hall-door, when he had completed that operation; but his father was not there. "I will speak to him in the morning," thought Ronald. "I was impatient with him for croaking78, as I thought, about Maddy. God help him, I'm much mistaken, or it's worse than he thinks for."
And so Captain Kilsyth went out to dinner, and was colder in his manner and much less lucid79 and decisive in his conversation than usual. He left the party early, did not "join the ladies;" and all the other guests, notably80 "the ladies" themselves, were of opinion that they had no loss.
"If Wilmot had not gone away when he did," said Kilsyth to his son, at an advanced stage of the long and sad conversation which took place between them on the following morning, "Maddy would have been quite well now. Nobody understood her as he did; you must have seen it to have believed it, Ronald. You always had some unaccountable prejudice against Wilmot--I could not get to the bottom of it--but you must have acknowledged that, if you had seen it."
"It is too late to talk about that now, sir," said Ronald; "and you are quite mistaken in supposing that I undervalue Dr. Wilmot's ability. But something decisive must be done at once; and as Wilmot's advice is not to be had, we must procure81 the best within our reach. There is no use now in looking back; but I do wonder Caird has permitted her to be without good advice all this time, and has suffered us to be so misled. He must have known of the cough being so bad in the morning, and of her exhaustion82 at times when neither you nor Lady Muriel saw her."
Kilsyth sighed. "I spoke14 to him yesterday," he said, "and I found him very easy about the matter. He says Maddy wouldn't have a strange doctor."
"Maddy wouldn't have a strange doctor! My dear father, what perfect nonsense! As if Maddy were the proper person to judge on such a subject--as if she ever ought to have been asked or consulted! As if anyone in what I fear is her state ever had any consciousness of danger! I recognise Caird completely in that, his invincible83 easiness, his selfishness, his--"
He stopped. Kilsyth was looking at him, new concern and anxiety in his face; and Ronald had no desire to cause either, beyond the absolute necessity of the case, to his father.
"However," he said, "let us at least be energetic now. Come with me to see her now, and then we will consult someone with a first-rate reputation. Maddy will not offer any resistance when she sees your anxiety, and knows your wishes."
Kilsyth and his son walked out together; and in the street he took Ronald's arm. He was changed, enfeebled, by the fear which had captured him a few days since, and held him inexorably in its grasp.
Madeleine received her father and brother cheerfully. As usual now, she was in her dressing-room, and also, as usual, she was lying down. Ramsay Caird had told her the previous evening that her father was anxious she should have immediate84 advice, and she was prepared to accede85 to the wish. Not that she shared it; not that, as Ronald supposed, she was unconscious of her danger, as consumptive persons usually are. Quite the contrary, in fact. Madeleine Caird firmly believed that she was dying; only she did not in the least wish to live; and neither did she wish that her father should learn the fact before it became inevitable86, which she felt it must, so soon as an experienced medical opinion should be taken upon her case.
But a certain dulness of all her faculties87 had made itself felt within the last few days, and she was particularly under its influence just then. She had neither the power nor the inclination88 to combat any opinion, to dissent89 from any wish. So she said, "Certainly, papa, if it will make your mind any easier about me;" and twined her thin arm round her father's neck and kissed him, when he said, "I may bring a doctor to see you then, my darling, and you will tell him all about yourself."
Her arm was still about his neck, and his brow was resting against her cheek, when he said:
"Ah, if Wilmot were only here! No one ever understood you like Wilmot, my darling."
Neither Ronald nor Madeleine said a word in reply; and when Ronald took leave of his sister, he avoided meeting her glance.
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1
habitually
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| ad.习惯地，通常地 | |
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deceptive
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| adj.骗人的，造成假象的，靠不住的 | |
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vivacity
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| n.快活，活泼，精神充沛 | |
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misgivings
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| n.疑虑，担忧，害怕；疑虑，担心，恐惧( misgiving的名词复数 )；疑惧 | |
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apprehension
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| n.理解，领悟；逮捕，拘捕；忧虑 | |
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outgrow
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| vt.长大得使…不再适用；成长得不再要 | |
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delicacy
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| n.精致，细微，微妙，精良；美味，佳肴 | |
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poetical
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possessed
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| adj.疯狂的；拥有的，占有的 | |
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foretold
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| v.预言，预示( foretell的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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remorseful
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| adj.悔恨的 | |
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opposition
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| n.反对，敌对 | |
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interval
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| n.间隔，间距；幕间休息，中场休息 | |
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spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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conspiracies
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| n.阴谋，密谋( conspiracy的名词复数 ) | |
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meddle
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vaguely
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justified
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| a.正当的，有理的 | |
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apprehensions
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wont
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| adj.习惯于；v.习惯；n.习惯 | |
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affinities
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| n.密切关系( affinity的名词复数 )；亲近；（生性）喜爱；类同 | |
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gushing
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| adj.迸出的；涌出的；喷出的；过分热情的v.喷，涌( gush的现在分词 )；滔滔不绝地说话 | |
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clannish
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attachment
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destined
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previously
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rout
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engrossed
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fussiness
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| [医]易激怒 | |
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fussy
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expedient
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kindly
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formerly
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estrangement
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disposition
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| n.性情，性格；意向，倾向；排列，部署 | |
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precisely
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| adv.恰好，正好，精确地，细致地 | |
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pique
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| v.伤害…的自尊心，使生气 n.不满，生气 | |
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sullenness
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| n. 愠怒, 沉闷, 情绪消沉 | |
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inevitably
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concealing
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| v.隐藏，隐瞒，遮住( conceal的现在分词 ) | |
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awakened
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| v.（使）醒( awaken的过去式和过去分词 )；（使）觉醒；弄醒；（使）意识到 | |
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undoubtedly
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| adv.确实地，无疑地 | |
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organisation
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| n.组织，安排，团体，有机休 | |
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paeans
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| n.赞歌，凯歌( paean的名词复数 ) | |
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judgment
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| n.审判；判断力，识别力，看法，意见 | |
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veins
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| n.纹理；矿脉( vein的名词复数 )；静脉；叶脉；纹理 | |
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propping
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| 支撑 | |
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profuse
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| adj.很多的，大量的，极其丰富的 | |
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tiresome
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| adj.令人疲劳的，令人厌倦的 | |
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peculiar
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| adj.古怪的，异常的；特殊的，特有的 | |
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humbug
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| n.花招，谎话，欺骗 | |
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delusion
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| n.谬见，欺骗，幻觉，迷惑 | |
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ailing
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| v.生病 | |
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reassure
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| v.使放心，使消除疑虑 | |
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mere
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| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
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miserable
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| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
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feverish
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| adj.发烧的，狂热的，兴奋的 | |
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remonstrance
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| n抗议，抱怨 | |
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dreaded
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| adj.令人畏惧的；害怕的v.害怕，恐惧，担心( dread的过去式和过去分词) | |
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furtive
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| adj.鬼鬼崇崇的，偷偷摸摸的 | |
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credence
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| n.信用，祭器台，供桌，凭证 | |
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honourable
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| adj.可敬的；荣誉的，光荣的 | |
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acting
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| n.演戏，行为，假装；adj.代理的，临时的，演出用的 | |
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charlatan
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| n.骗子；江湖医生；假内行 | |
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impatience
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| n.不耐烦，急躁 | |
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awfully
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| adv.可怕地，非常地，极端地 | |
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tormented
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| 饱受折磨的 | |
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essentially
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| adv.本质上，实质上，基本上 | |
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meditations
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| 默想( meditation的名词复数 )； 默念； 沉思； 冥想 | |
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contentedly
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| adv.心满意足地 | |
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enticed
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| 诱惑，怂恿( entice的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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distractions
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| n.使人分心的事[人]( distraction的名词复数 )；娱乐，消遣；心烦意乱；精神错乱 | |
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precipitately
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| adv.猛进地 | |
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smitten
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| 猛打，重击，打击( smite的过去分词 ) | |
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abridge
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| v.删减，删节，节略，缩短 | |
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appalled
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| v.使惊骇，使充满恐惧( appall的过去式和过去分词)adj.惊骇的；丧胆的 | |
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indifference
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| n.不感兴趣，不关心，冷淡，不在乎 | |
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croaking
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| v.呱呱地叫( croak的现在分词 )；用粗的声音说 | |
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lucid
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| adj.明白易懂的，清晰的，头脑清楚的 | |
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notably
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| adv.值得注意地，显著地，尤其地，特别地 | |
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procure
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| vt.获得，取得，促成；vi.拉皮条 | |
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exhaustion
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| n.耗尽枯竭，疲惫，筋疲力尽，竭尽，详尽无遗的论述 | |
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invincible
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| adj.不可征服的，难以制服的 | |
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immediate
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| adj.立即的；直接的，最接近的；紧靠的 | |
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accede
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| v.应允，同意 | |
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inevitable
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| adj.不可避免的，必然发生的 | |
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faculties
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| n.能力( faculty的名词复数 )；全体教职员；技巧；院 | |
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inclination
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| n.倾斜；点头；弯腰；斜坡；倾度；倾向；爱好 | |
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dissent
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| n./v.不同意，持异议 | |
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