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CHAPTER VII ROCHE ST. MARY MOOR
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 Terror is a tall word; it should not, perhaps, be used, in this trivial history, in connection with the feelings and motives1 of so youthfully comfortable a character as Philip—nevertheless very nearly akin2 to terror itself was Philip’s emotion on discovering the results of his disgraceful encounter with Aunt Aggie4 ... because there were no results.
As he had watched Aunt Aggie trembling, silent, emotional, retreat (after striking Philip she had risen and, without a word, left the room), he had thought that the moment for all his cards to be placed dramatically upon the Trenchard table had at last come. Perhaps they would tell him that he must go; they would openly urge Katherine to abandon him, and then, faced, with force and violence, by the two alternatives, he was assured, absolutely assured, of her loyalty5 to himself. He saw her, protesting that she would love them all, reminded that (Philip being proved an abomination) she must now choose, finally going out into the world with Philip.
He went to his room that Sunday evening triumphant6. No more Trenchard secrets and mysteries—thanks to that horrible old woman, the way was clear. He came down the next morning to breakfast expecting to be treated with chilly7 politeness, to be asked to interview George Trenchard in his study, to hear Trenchard say: “Well, my dear boy—I’m very sorry of course—but you must see with me that it’s better to break off ...” and then his reply.
“That, sir, must remain with Katherine. I am bound to her....” No, he had no fear of the result. As he came down the stairs on that Monday morning, a fine hot spring day, with the mist of the spring heat hazy8 above the shining grass, his eyes were lighter9, his spirits higher than they had been since his first coming to Garth. He entered the dining-room, and thought that he had dreamt yesterday’s incidents.
Millie cried—“Hullo, Phil! Late as usual.”
George Trenchard said: “Philip, what do you say to a drive over to Trezent? It’s a good day and I’ve some business there.”
Aunt Aggie gave him her withered10 hand to shake with exactly the proud, peevish11 air that she always used to him. There was a scratch on his face where her rings had cut him; he looked at her rings ... yes, he was surely dreaming. Then there crept to him the conviction that the plot—the family plot—seen before vaguely12, mysteriously and uncertainly—was now developing before his eyes as something far deeper, far more soundless, far more determined13 than he had ever conceived. Mrs. Trenchard, smiling there at the head of the table, knew what she was about. That outburst of Aunt Aggie’s last night had been a slip—They would make no more.
His little quarrel with Katherine had needed no words to mark its conclusion. He loved her, he felt, just twice as deeply as he had loved her before ... he was not sure, though, that he was not now a little—a very little—afraid of her....
In the middle of the week, waking, very early on the most wonderful of all spring mornings, his inspiration came to him.
He got up, and about half-past seven was knocking on Katherine’s door. She spoke14 to him from within the room.
“Katie!”
“Yes!”
He whispered to her in the half-lit house, across whose floors the light, carrying the scent15 of the garden-flowers, shook and trembled; he felt a conspirator16.
“Look here! You’ve got to dress at once and come off with me somewhere.”
“Go off!”
“Yes, for the day! I’ve thought it all out. We can take the pony-cart and just catch the nine o’clock at Rasselas. That’ll get us to Clinton by ten. We’ll be down in Roche Cove3 by eleven—spend the day there, catch the eight-thirty back and be in the house again by half-past ten to-night.”
There was a pause, filled with the delighted twittering of a company of sparrows beyond the open passage-window.
At last her voice:
“Yes. I’ll come.”
“Good.... Hurry!... I’ll tell them downstairs.”
When the family assembled for breakfast and he told them, his eyes challenged Mrs. Trenchard’s.
“Now, look here,” his eyes said, “I’m the dreadful young man who is teaching your boy Henry to drink, who’s ruining your domestic peace—surely you’re not, without protest, going to allow me a whole day with Katherine!”
And her eyes answered him.
“Oh, I’m not afraid.... You’ll come back. You’re a weak young man.”
In the train he considered, with a beating heart, his project. The day encouraged adventure, boldness, romance; he was still young enough to believe in the intangible illusion of a Deity17 Who hangs His signs and colours upon the sky to signify His approval of one bold mortal’s projects, and no ironic18 sense of contrast attacked, as yet, his belief. If the Trenchards refused to make the incident of Sunday night a crisis, he would, himself, force them to recognise it. He had been passive long enough ... he did not know that, all his life, he had never been anything else.
In the train they talked to one another very little. He watched her and was bewildered, as are all lovers, by her proximity19 and her remoteness. The very love that brought her so close to him made her the more remote because it clothed her in strange mystery.
She was further from him than Anna had ever been, because he loved her more deeply ... and at the thought of Anna—so constant now and so sinister20—he had a sudden fear of the success of his project....
Clinton St. Mary is a village, with one ugly street, on the very edge of Roche St. Mary Moor21. It has visitors from the outside world because, in a hollow in the moor, lie the remains22 of St. Arthe Church, one of the earliest Christian23 buildings in Great Britain, ‘buried until lately in the sand, but recently excavated24 through the kind generosity25 of Sir John Porthcullis, Bart., of Borhaze, and shown to visitors, 6d. a head—Wednesday and Saturday afternoons free.’ Tourists therefore continually patronise ‘The Hearty27 Cow’ in Clinton, where there is every day a cold luncheon—ham, chicken, beef, tart28, junket, cheese—for half-a-crown a-head. Katherine also had relations here, the Vicar, the Rev29. James Trenchard, being a cousin ‘and a dear old man’. However, to-day the world should be for themselves alone. In the village they bought ginger-beer, ham-sandwiches, saffron buns, chocolate. They set off across the Moor.
When they had walked a very little way they were suddenly engulfed30. Behind them the road, the trees, the village were wrapped in blue haze26: to the right, very faintly the yellow sand-hills hovered31. In the sandy ground at their feet little pools that caught blue fragments of sky shone like squares of marble: out of the tufts of coarse grass larks32 rose, circling, like sudden sprays of some flashing into the air as a fountain flashes: no mortal being was visible in this world.
They walked for two hours and exchanged scarcely a word. Philip felt as though he had never had Katherine alone with him before since the day of their engagement—always there had been people between them, and, if not people, then his own silly fancies and imaginations. As he looked his love was now neither reasoning nor hesitating. “I am stronger than you all,” he could shout to the ironical33 heavens, for the first time in all his days. Then she spoke to him, and her voice reminded him of his desperate plans.... His confidence left him. It was his great misfortune that he never believed in himself.
Very little, this morning, was Katherine troubled about dreams or fancies. She was happy, as she had always been happy, with absolute simplicity34, her trust in the ultimate perfection of the world being so strong in her that a fine day, her closeness to Philip, her own bodily health and fitness were enough to sweep all morbidities far away. She had not been happy lately—some new force had been stirring in her that was strange to her and unreal, like a bad dream.
But now her unhappiness of the last weeks was as faint as the hazy mist, as shadowy as the thin curtain of sea that now spread before them, hung like gauze between two humped and staring sand-hills. They rushed down the deep cup of the sand-valley and up, through the thin wiry grass, to the top, then down again, then up once more to be perched on the very edge of the path that twisted down to their Cove. The sea-breeze, warm and soft, invited them.... Down they went.
The Cove was hidden by black rocks, piled together, seeming, through the mist, to be animals herded35 together to guard its sanctity. Under the rocks the Cove lay, curved like a small golden saucer, the sea forming here a thin glassy lake, protected by a further range of rocks that extended, as though placed there by human agency, across the mouth of the tiny circle. The water within the rocks was utterly36 clear, the seaweed, red-gold and green, covering the inside of the cup: when the waves broke beyond the barrier they were echoed here by a faint ripple37 that trembled, in green shadows, like a happy sigh across the surface, and, with this ripple, came the echo of the dull boom that the surging tide was making in the distant caves: this echo was a giant’s chuckle38, sinister, malevolent39, but filtered. When the tide was coming in, the ripples40, running in faint lines from side to side, covered the shining surface of the rocks and stones, with layers of water, thin and fine like silk, now purple, now golden, now white and grey.
The silk stretched over the rocks, drew itself taut41, then spilt itself suddenly, with a delighted ecstasy42, in cascades43 of shining water, into the breast of the retreating tide. As the tide went out, very reluctantly the colour withdrew from the rocks, leaving them, at last, hard and dry beneath the sun ... but at the heart of the smooth, glassy cup, on these warm spring days, there was a great peace and content: birds, sea-gulls, sparrows, thrushes, came to the edge of the golden sand, and with trembling, twittering happiness listened to the hollow booming in the distant caves.
Lying there, on the little beach, upon such a spring day as this, man might be assured that the world had been made only for his especial comfort and safety. The intense blue of the sky, the green wall of hill behind him, these things could not change: for an hour of his journey, life, gay rather than solemn, humorous rather than ironic, satisfying and complete, would seem to be revealed to him. He would wonder that he had ever doubted it....
Katherine and Philip lay, for a long time, saying very little, listening to the gentle hiss44 of the water, watching the line, beyond the rocks, where the sea was suddenly deep blue, feeling the sun upon their faces, and the little breeze that, once and again, with a sudden gesture of merriment ruffled45 the faces of the golden pools with a flurry of grey splashes and shadows. They ate their sandwiches and saffron buns and drank their ginger-beer, which resembled hot-soap-and-water: Katherine waited. She knew that Philip had something to say to her, that he had brought her here with some purpose, and she seemed to know also that that gentle sunny hour of the late morning was to be the last moment in some stage in her life. Her first meeting with him, his proposal to her, her talk afterwards with her mother, her coming to Garth with him, his confession46 at Rafiel, their first quarrel yesterday—all these had been stages in her growth. She waited now with a struggle, a maturity47 that had been far from her experience a year ago.
He began at last, holding her hand covered by both of his, searching her eyes with his, very grave; she saw with a little loving smile to herself that he intended to be of an immense seriousness, that his sense of humour was very far away. He began as though he were carrying through the most tremendous business of his life—and a sparrow, perched on the water’s edge, seemed to watch his gravity with a twitter of superior amusement.
“Do you mind my talking now a little? There’s something I’ve got to say.”
“It’s a beautiful place for talking. There’s no Aunt Aggie ... only one sparrow to overhear us.”
“But it’s really important—terribly important. It’s simply this—that last night was a crisis. I’m never going back to Garth again.”
Katherine laughed, but her eyes were suddenly frightened.
“My dear Phil ... What do you mean?”
“No, I’m not—I mean—at least not until certain things have happened. You’re not going back either—”
“I’m not going back?”
“No, not as Miss Katherine Trenchard—one day as Mrs. Philip Mark, perhaps.”
Katherine drew her hand from his, sat up, looked out to the deep blue line of sea, said, at last, quietly:
“Now please, Philip, explain the joke. The afternoon’s too lovely to be wasted.”
“There is no joke. I’m perfectly48 serious. I can’t stand it any longer. I cannot stand it—and when I say ‘it’ I mean the family, their treatment of me, their dislike of me, their determination to swallow me up in their feather-bed and make an end of me—the whole long engagement; you’re suffering. I’m suffering. You were wretched yesterday—so was I. When you’re wretched I could burn the whole family, Garth and Glebeshire and all included and waste no pity whatever.”
But Katherine only laughed:
“Do you know, Phil, you’re exaggerating the whole thing in the most ridiculous manner. It’s quite natural—it’s because you don’t know our habits and manners. Aunt Aggie lost her temper last night—we were all rather worked up—Sunday can be awful. She won’t lose her temper again. We had a quarrel. Well, I suppose all lovers have quarrels. You think they’ll all be terribly shocked because you let Henry drink too much that night in London. That shows that you simply don’t know the family at all, because if you did you’d know that it’s never shocked at anything that it hasn’t seen with its own eyes. Aunt Aggie saw Henry, so she was shocked—but for the others.... If they were to know—well, what you told me at Rafiel—then—perhaps—”
“Then?” Philip cried eagerly.
“They might be—I don’t know what they’d do.” She turned her eyes to his face again. “But you’re so impatient, Phil. You want everything to happen in a minute—You’re discontented because they all have their own lives, which you can’t share. But you’re so strange. I’m the person whose life you ought to share, and yet you don’t. You’ve hardly looked at all this. You’ve taken no interest at all in the fishermen or the villagers. Garth is nothing to you—”
“I hate Garth!” he broke out furiously. “I—” Then he dropped his voice. “That’ll all come later.... I’ll just say this about myself. It’s only what I’ve always told you, that I’m simply not worthy49 for you to care about me. You may have had some illusions about me at first. You can’t have any now. I’m weak and backboneless, always wanting things better than I can have them, ready to be influenced by simply anyone if they’re nice to me, hating it when people aren’t nice. I’m no good at all, except for one thing—my love for you.”
He bent50 forward and drew her towards him.
“I have never known anything like it before. I shall never know anything like it again—and just because I do know myself so well I’m going to hold on to it and let nothing take it from me. They, all of them—are doing their best to take it from me. Your mother knows me much better than you do.... She despises me completely and she knows the way to influence me.”
Katherine would have spoken, but he stopped her.
“Oh, yes, she does. Have you noticed that she and I are never alone together, that we never have talks nor walks nor anything? She is always perfectly kind, but she knows, and I know that she knows, that if I were once to get really intimate with her I might overcome my fright of her, that it’s by my imagination of her that she’s influencing me. And she is ... she is ... she is.” His hand trembled against Katherine. “You don’t know. You don’t see! You love her and think that she’s simply your mother. But you don’t know.... Already she can get me to do anything she likes. If she wants me to waste every day doing nothing, thinking nothing, becoming a stupid bore, with no ambitions, no lips of his own, no energy—and that’s what she does want—she’s making me exactly that. I feel her when she’s not there—all over the house, in the garden, in the roads. I can’t escape her. In half a year’s time, when the wedding day comes, all I shall want is to be allowed to cut the flowers for the dinner-table and to hold your mother’s wool when she’s winding51 it.”
He paused, stood suddenly upon his feet: “It’s like my own mother over again—only Mrs. Trenchard’s cleverer ... but I tell you, Katie, you shan’t marry a man like that. If you marry me down there, and we’re to spend all our lives there, a year after marriage you’ll despise me, hate me for the thing I’ve become.... I’ve thought it all out. That scene last night decided52 me. You shan’t go back—not until we’re married.”
He stood proudly facing her, his whole body stirred to his decision. But even then, as she looked at him she saw that his upper lip trembled a little—his upper lip had always been weak. He looked down at her, then sat very close to her, leaning towards her as though he were pleading with her.
“I know that ever since our engagement you’ve been thinking that I’ve imagined things. Perhaps I have. Perhaps that’s my way, and always has been. And Russia increased my tendency. But if that’s true then it ought to be taken into account just as much as though I’d got a game leg or was blind of one eye. You can’t just dismiss it and say: ‘He’s a silly ass—he oughtn’t to imagine things’. I know that if I were sensible I should just hang on for six months more, marry you and then take you right off. But I know myself—by that time I shall simply do exactly what your mother tells me—and she’ll tell me to dig potatoes in the garden.”
“You’re unjust to yourself, Phil,” looking up at him. “You’re not so weak ... and soon you’ll love Garth. You’ll understand the family, even perhaps mother. It must come—it must. I want it so.”
“It will never come,” he answered her firmly. “You can make up your mind to that now for ever. The only way we can live altogether like a happy family in the future is for me to become a chair or table or one of your aunt’s green cushions. That’s what I shall become if I don’t do something now.”
She waited because she saw that he had more to say.
“And do you suppose that even then any of us would be happy? See already how everyone is changed! Millie, Henry, Aunt Aggie, you, even your father. Isn’t he always wondering now what’s come over everyone? There’s a surprised look in his eyes. And it’s I!... I!... I! It’s like a pebble53 in your shoe that you can’t find. I’m the pebble, and they’ll never be comfortable so long as I’m here. They’re not only threatened with losing you, they’re threatened with losing their confidence, their trust, their superstitions54.”
“I’m one of them,” Katherine said. “You forget that. We may be slow and stupid and unimaginative, as you say, but we are fond of one another. You’re impatient, Phil. I tell you to wait ... wait!”
“Wait!” He looked out to sea, where the bar of blue was now sown with white dancing feathers. “I can’t wait ... there’s something else. There’s Anna.”
Katherine nodded her head as though she had known that this would come.
“Ever since that day at Rafiel she’s been between us; you’ve known it as well as I. It hasn’t been quite as I’d expected. I thought perhaps that you’d be shocked. You weren’t shocked. I thought that I’d be confused myself. I haven’t been confused. You’ve wanted to know about her—anything I could tell you. You’ve simply been curious, as you might, about anyone I’d known before I met you—but the business has been this, that the more you’ve asked the more I’ve thought about her. The more she’s come back to me. It hasn’t been that I’ve wanted her, even that I’ve thought tenderly about her, only that your curiosity has revived all that life as though I were back in it all again. I’ve remembered so much that I’d forgotten.”
Katherine took his hand and came close to him. “Yes. I knew that it was like that,” she said. “I knew that it was foolish of me to ask questions, to make you talk about her, and I couldn’t help myself—I knew that it was foolish, and I couldn’t help myself. And the strange thing is that I don’t suppose I’ve ever wondered about anyone whom I didn’t know in my life before. I’ve never been able to imagine people unless I had pictures or something to help me. But now—I seem to see her as though I’d known her all my days. And I’m not jealous—no, truly, truly, I’m not jealous. And yet I don’t like her—I grudge—I grudge—”
She suddenly hid her face in the sleeve of his coat and her hand went up to his cheek.
Philip, holding her with his arm as though he were protecting her, went on: “And you’ve felt that I didn’t want you to ask me questions about her—and you’ve been silent. I knew that you were silent because you were afraid of my restlessness, and that has made restraint between us. You wouldn’t speak and I wouldn’t speak, and we’ve both been thinking of Anna until we’ve created her between us. It’s so like her—so like her. Why,” he went on, “you’ll think this absurd perhaps—but I don’t know—it’s not so absurd when you’ve lived with her. I wrote and told her about us—about our engagement. I’ve never had an answer from her, but I can fancy her saying to herself: ‘It would be amusing to bring him back to me—not that I want him. I should be bored to death if I had to live with him again—but just for the humour of it. He was always so weak. He’ll come if I ask him.’
“I can imagine her saying that, and then I can imagine her just projecting herself over here into the middle of us—simply for the fun of it. I can see her laughing to herself in the way she used to when she saw people behaving in what she thought was a childish fashion. So now she’ll think us all childish, and she’ll simply come here, her laughing, mocking spirit—and do her best to break us all up.”
“You’re afraid of her!” Katherine cried, as though she were challenging him.
“Yes. I’m afraid of her,” he acknowledged.
“Well, I’m not,” she answered. “She can do her utmost. She can laugh as much as she pleases.”
“She shall be given no chance,” he answered eagerly. “See, Katherine! Listen!... All that matters is that we should be married. She can’t touch us then—Garth can’t touch us, the family can’t touch us. I suddenly saw it as an inspiration—that you’ve got to come up with me now—to London. We’ll get a special licence. We’ll be married to-morrow. If we catch the five-thirty from Truxe we’ll be up there soon after midnight. We can get a trap in Clinton to drive us over. It’s got to be. It’s just got to be. There can be no alternative.”
She shook her head smiling. “What a baby you are, Phil! Just because Aunt Aggie lost her temper last night we’ve got to be married in half an hour. And what about our promise to father of a year’s engagement?”
“That’s all right,” he answered eagerly. “If your father had wanted to break off the engagement before the year’s up he’d have done so, you can be sure.”
She laughed. “But I don’t want to be married all in a minute. You don’t know how women care about trousseaux and presents and bells and—”
“Ah! Please, Katie!... It’s most awfully55 serious! Please—”
She was grave then. They stood up together on the little beach, her arm round his neck.
“Phil. I do understand better than you think. But do you know what it would mean if we were to run away now like this? My mother would never forgive me. It would mean that I was throwing off everything—the place, mother, all my life.... Of course I would throw it away for you if that were the only course to take. But it isn’t the only course. You see life exaggerated, Phil. Everything that happened yesterday has irritated you. To-morrow—”
“To-morrow may be too late,” he answered her. “At least give my idea half an hour, I’ll go off now for a walk by myself. In half an hour’s time I’ll be back. Do your best for me.”
She looked at him, bent forward and kissed him.
“Yes, go—Come back in half an hour.”
She watched him climb the rocks, wind up the path, turn at the bend and look back to her, then disappear. She sat down on the beach, rested her elbows on her knees and looked out to sea. She was utterly alone: the pool, now spun56 gold, beneath a sun that was slowly sinking to bars of saffron, quivered only with the reaction of the retreating tide; the rocks were black and sharp against the evening sky.
Katherine, as she sat there, had, at first, a desperate wish for the help of some older person’s advice. It was not that she could, for an instant, seriously contemplate57 this mad proposal of Philip’s—and yet he had imparted to her some of his own fear and distrust of the possible machinations of heaven. What he had said was true—that ever since he had told her about Anna it had been as though they had taken some third person into their lives—taken her unwillingly58, almost unconsciously, but nevertheless destructively. Then also, although Katherine had denied it, she knew now that what he had said about the family was true. She not only could not hope now that they and Philip would ever live happily together—it was also the fact that they had changed. Her mother had changed—her Aunts, her father, Millie, Henry—they had all changed—changed to her and changed to themselves.
Katherine, moreover, now for the first time in her life criticised her family—even her mother. She felt as though she and Philip had needed help, and that the family, instead of giving it, had made difficulties and trouble. Her mother had, deliberately59, made trouble—had been hard and unkind to Philip, had brought him to Garth that he might seem to Katherine unsuited there, had put him into impossible positions and then laughed at him. Her mother had come to her and asked her to give Philip up; in retrospect60 that scene of yesterday afternoon seemed a deliberate challenge—but a challenge offered behind Philip’s back.
Now her whole impulse was that Philip must at all costs be protected and defended, and, for the first time, this afternoon, sitting there alone with the world all hers, she realised how her feeling for him had changed. When she had first known him she had fallen in love with him because she had thought him the strongest, most adventurous61, most fearless of mortal souls. Now—she knew that he was weak, afraid of himself, unbalanced, a prey62 to moods, impulses, terrors—and with that knowledge of him her love had grown, had flung its wide arm about him, had caught him to her heart with a fierce protection that the attraction for his strength had never given her.
With her new knowledge of him came also her direct antagonism63 with that other woman. She knew that what Philip had said was true, that her curiosity had increased for them both the live actuality of that figure. Katherine had always been afraid of cynical64 people, who must, always, she felt, despise her for the simplicity of her beliefs, the confidence of her trust. She remembered a woman who had, at one time, been a close friend of Aunt Aggie’s, a sharp, masculine woman with pincenez, who, when Katherine had said anything, had looked at her sharply through her glasses, laughed as though she were ringing a coin to see whether it were good metal, and said: ‘Do you think so?’
Katherine had hated her and been always helpless before her, clumsy, awkward and tongue-tied. Now it was a woman of that kind whom she was called out to challenge. Her thought in church yesterday was with her now more strongly than ever. “How she would despise me if she knew me!...” and then, “what a power she must have if she can come back like this into Philip’s life.”
And yet not such a power! Always before him was that world where he was not: his fancy, running before him, cried to him: “Yes. There! There! was happiness,” or “In such a fashion happiness will come to you”—as though the only end of life was happiness, the security of the ideal moment. Yes, Katherine knew why Anna had laughed at Philip.
Her thoughts turned back again then to his mad idea of their escape to London, and, suddenly, as though some woman were with her whom she had never seen before, some voice within her cried: “Ah! I wish he’d make me go! simply take me prisoner, force me by brutal65 strength, leave me no will nor power.” Her imagination, excited, almost breathless, began to play round this. She saw his return, heard him ask her whether she would go with him, heard her answer that she would not, heard him say: “But you are in my power now. I have arranged everything. Whether you like it or not we go....”
She would protest, but in her surrender, triumphant at heart, she would see her utter defeat of that other woman, whose baffled ghost might whistle across the dark moor back to its own country to find other humours for its decision.
“Poor Ghost,” she might cry after it, “you did not know that he would prove so strong!” Nor would he.... Her dream faded like the trembling colours in the evening sea.
And otherwise, unless that were so, she could not go. She had no illusions as to what her escape with him would mean. There would be no return for her to Garth—even Glebeshire itself would cast her out. As she thought of all her days, of her babyhood, when the world had been the green lawn and the old oak, of her girlhood, when Rafiel and Polchester had been the farthest bounds, of all the fair days and the wild days, of the scents66 and the sounds and the cries and the laughter, it seemed that the little cove itself came close to her, pressing up to her, touching67 her cheek, whispering to her: “You will not go!... You will not go!... You will not go!” No, of her own will she could not go. The golden pool was very full, swelling68 with a lift and fall that caught the light of the sun as though the evening itself were rocking it. Against the far band of rocks the tide was breaking with a white flash of colour, and the distant caves boomed like drums. But the peace was undisturbed; birds slowly, with a dreamy beat of wings, vanished into a sky that was almost radiant white ... and behind her, the dark rocks, more than ever watching, guarding beasts that loved her, waited for her decision.
Then all things faded before her vision of her mother. That so familiar figure seemed to come towards her with a freshness, a piquancy69, as though mother and daughter had been parted for years. “We’ve misunderstood one another,” the figure seemed to say: “there shall never be misunderstanding again.” There seemed, at that moment, to be no one else in Katherine’s world: looking back she could see, in all her past life, only her mother’s face, could hear only her mother’s voice.
She remembered the day when she had told her about the engagement, the day when she had forgotten about the Stores, yesterday in her bedroom....
She buried her face in her hands, feeling a wild, desperate despair—as though life were too strong for her and her will too weak.
She felt a touch on her shoulder, and saw that Philip had returned, his face in the dusk was pale like the white sky.
“Well?” he said.
She shook her head, smiling a dismal70 little smile. “I can’t go.... You know that I can’t.”
(That other woman in her whispered: ‘Now he must compel you.’)
Philip looked out to sea.
“I can’t,” she repeated. “I can’t leave it all.”
(‘Ah! make me go!’ that other whispered.)
He turned away from her and looked back at the rocks.
“You care for all this more than for me.”
“You know that that is not true. I care for you more than anyone or anything in the world. But these have all been fancies of yours, Phil. In six months time—” she broke off.
(‘Force me, compel me to go with you,’ the other woman whispered to him. But he did not hear.)
“Yes. We’ll go back,” he said.
They were silent. Suddenly he gripped her shoulder, and they both turned and looked behind them.
“I thought I heard someone laugh,” he whispered.
She rose, then before they moved away, put her arm round him with a close, maternal71 gesture that she had never used to him before.

点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 motives 6c25d038886898b20441190abe240957     
n.动机,目的( motive的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • to impeach sb's motives 怀疑某人的动机
  • His motives are unclear. 他的用意不明。
2 akin uxbz2     
adj.同族的,类似的
参考例句:
  • She painted flowers and birds pictures akin to those of earlier feminine painters.她画一些同早期女画家类似的花鸟画。
  • Listening to his life story is akin to reading a good adventure novel.听他的人生故事犹如阅读一本精彩的冒险小说。
3 cove 9Y8zA     
n.小海湾,小峡谷
参考例句:
  • The shore line is wooded,olive-green,a pristine cove.岸边一带林木蓊郁,嫩绿一片,好一个山外的小海湾。
  • I saw two children were playing in a cove.我看到两个小孩正在一个小海湾里玩耍。
4 aggie MzCzdW     
n.农校,农科大学生
参考例句:
  • Maybe I will buy a Aggie ring next year when I have money.也许明年等我有了钱,我也会订一枚毕业生戒指吧。
  • The Aggie replied,"sir,I believe that would be giddy-up."这个大学生慢条斯理的说,“先生,我相信是昏死过去。”
5 loyalty gA9xu     
n.忠诚,忠心
参考例句:
  • She told him the truth from a sense of loyalty.她告诉他真相是出于忠诚。
  • His loyalty to his friends was never in doubt.他对朋友的一片忠心从来没受到怀疑。
6 triumphant JpQys     
adj.胜利的,成功的;狂欢的,喜悦的
参考例句:
  • The army made a triumphant entry into the enemy's capital.部队胜利地进入了敌方首都。
  • There was a positively triumphant note in her voice.她的声音里带有一种极为得意的语气。
7 chilly pOfzl     
adj.凉快的,寒冷的
参考例句:
  • I feel chilly without a coat.我由于没有穿大衣而感到凉飕飕的。
  • I grew chilly when the fire went out.炉火熄灭后,寒气逼人。
8 hazy h53ya     
adj.有薄雾的,朦胧的;不肯定的,模糊的
参考例句:
  • We couldn't see far because it was so hazy.雾气蒙蒙妨碍了我们的视线。
  • I have a hazy memory of those early years.对那些早先的岁月我有着朦胧的记忆。
9 lighter 5pPzPR     
n.打火机,点火器;驳船;v.用驳船运送;light的比较级
参考例句:
  • The portrait was touched up so as to make it lighter.这张画经过润色,色调明朗了一些。
  • The lighter works off the car battery.引燃器利用汽车蓄电池打火。
10 withered 342a99154d999c47f1fc69d900097df9     
adj. 枯萎的,干瘪的,(人身体的部分器官)因病萎缩的或未发育良好的 动词wither的过去式和过去分词形式
参考例句:
  • The grass had withered in the warm sun. 这些草在温暖的阳光下枯死了。
  • The leaves of this tree have become dry and withered. 这棵树下的叶子干枯了。
11 peevish h35zj     
adj.易怒的,坏脾气的
参考例句:
  • A peevish child is unhappy and makes others unhappy.一个脾气暴躁的孩子自己不高兴也使别人不高兴。
  • She glared down at me with a peevish expression on her face.她低头瞪着我,一脸怒气。
12 vaguely BfuzOy     
adv.含糊地,暖昧地
参考例句:
  • He had talked vaguely of going to work abroad.他含糊其词地说了到国外工作的事。
  • He looked vaguely before him with unseeing eyes.他迷迷糊糊的望着前面,对一切都视而不见。
13 determined duszmP     
adj.坚定的;有决心的
参考例句:
  • I have determined on going to Tibet after graduation.我已决定毕业后去西藏。
  • He determined to view the rooms behind the office.他决定查看一下办公室后面的房间。
14 spoke XryyC     
n.(车轮的)辐条;轮辐;破坏某人的计划;阻挠某人的行动 v.讲,谈(speak的过去式);说;演说;从某种观点来说
参考例句:
  • They sourced the spoke nuts from our company.他们的轮辐螺帽是从我们公司获得的。
  • The spokes of a wheel are the bars that connect the outer ring to the centre.辐条是轮子上连接外圈与中心的条棒。
15 scent WThzs     
n.气味,香味,香水,线索,嗅觉;v.嗅,发觉
参考例句:
  • The air was filled with the scent of lilac.空气中弥漫着丁香花的芬芳。
  • The flowers give off a heady scent at night.这些花晚上散发出醉人的芳香。
16 conspirator OZayz     
n.阴谋者,谋叛者
参考例句:
  • We started abusing him,one conspirator after another adding his bitter words.我们这几个预谋者一个接一个地咒骂他,恶狠狠地骂个不停。
  • A conspirator is not of the stuff to bear surprises.谋反者是经不起惊吓的。
17 deity UmRzp     
n.神,神性;被奉若神明的人(或物)
参考例句:
  • Many animals were seen as the manifestation of a deity.许多动物被看作神的化身。
  • The deity was hidden in the deepest recesses of the temple.神藏在庙宇壁龛的最深处。
18 ironic 1atzm     
adj.讽刺的,有讽刺意味的,出乎意料的
参考例句:
  • That is a summary and ironic end.那是一个具有概括性和讽刺意味的结局。
  • People used to call me Mr Popularity at high school,but they were being ironic.人们中学时常把我称作“万人迷先生”,但他们是在挖苦我。
19 proximity 5RsxM     
n.接近,邻近
参考例句:
  • Marriages in proximity of blood are forbidden by the law.法律规定禁止近亲结婚。
  • Their house is in close proximity to ours.他们的房子很接近我们的。
20 sinister 6ETz6     
adj.不吉利的,凶恶的,左边的
参考例句:
  • There is something sinister at the back of that series of crimes.在这一系列罪行背后有险恶的阴谋。
  • Their proposals are all worthless and designed out of sinister motives.他们的建议不仅一钱不值,而且包藏祸心。
21 moor T6yzd     
n.荒野,沼泽;vt.(使)停泊;vi.停泊
参考例句:
  • I decided to moor near some tourist boats.我决定在一些观光船附近停泊。
  • There were hundreds of the old huts on the moor.沼地上有成百上千的古老的石屋。
22 remains 1kMzTy     
n.剩余物,残留物;遗体,遗迹
参考例句:
  • He ate the remains of food hungrily.他狼吞虎咽地吃剩余的食物。
  • The remains of the meal were fed to the dog.残羹剩饭喂狗了。
23 Christian KVByl     
adj.基督教徒的;n.基督教徒
参考例句:
  • They always addressed each other by their Christian name.他们总是以教名互相称呼。
  • His mother is a sincere Christian.他母亲是个虔诚的基督教徒。
24 excavated 3cafdb6f7c26ffe41daf7aa353505858     
v.挖掘( excavate的过去式和过去分词 );开凿;挖出;发掘
参考例句:
  • The site has been excavated by archaeologists. 这个遗址已被考古学家发掘出来。
  • The archaeologists excavated an ancient fortress. 考古学家们发掘出一个古堡。 来自《简明英汉词典》
25 generosity Jf8zS     
n.大度,慷慨,慷慨的行为
参考例句:
  • We should match their generosity with our own.我们应该像他们一样慷慨大方。
  • We adore them for their generosity.我们钦佩他们的慷慨。
26 haze O5wyb     
n.霾,烟雾;懵懂,迷糊;vi.(over)变模糊
参考例句:
  • I couldn't see her through the haze of smoke.在烟雾弥漫中,我看不见她。
  • He often lives in a haze of whisky.他常常是在威士忌的懵懂醉意中度过的。
27 hearty Od1zn     
adj.热情友好的;衷心的;尽情的,纵情的
参考例句:
  • After work they made a hearty meal in the worker's canteen.工作完了,他们在工人食堂饱餐了一顿。
  • We accorded him a hearty welcome.我们给他热忱的欢迎。
28 tart 0qIwH     
adj.酸的;尖酸的,刻薄的;n.果馅饼;淫妇
参考例句:
  • She was learning how to make a fruit tart in class.她正在课上学习如何制作水果馅饼。
  • She replied in her usual tart and offhand way.她开口回答了,用她平常那种尖酸刻薄的声调随口说道。
29 rev njvzwS     
v.发动机旋转,加快速度
参考例句:
  • It's his job to rev up the audience before the show starts.他要负责在表演开始前鼓动观众的热情。
  • Don't rev the engine so hard.别让发动机转得太快。
30 engulfed 52ce6eb2bc4825e9ce4b243448ffecb3     
v.吞没,包住( engulf的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • He was engulfed by a crowd of reporters. 他被一群记者团团围住。
  • The little boat was engulfed by the waves. 小船被波浪吞没了。 来自《简明英汉词典》
31 hovered d194b7e43467f867f4b4380809ba6b19     
鸟( hover的过去式和过去分词 ); 靠近(某事物); (人)徘徊; 犹豫
参考例句:
  • A hawk hovered over the hill. 一只鹰在小山的上空翱翔。
  • A hawk hovered in the blue sky. 一只老鹰在蓝色的天空中翱翔。
32 larks 05e5fd42fbbb0fa8ae0d9a20b6f3efe1     
n.百灵科鸟(尤指云雀)( lark的名词复数 );一大早就起床;鸡鸣即起;(因太费力而不想干时说)算了v.百灵科鸟(尤指云雀)( lark的第三人称单数 );一大早就起床;鸡鸣即起;(因太费力而不想干时说)算了
参考例句:
  • Maybe if she heard the larks sing she'd write. 玛丽听到云雀的歌声也许会写信的。 来自名作英译部分
  • But sure there are no larks in big cities. 可大城市里哪有云雀呢。” 来自名作英译部分
33 ironical F4QxJ     
adj.讽刺的,冷嘲的
参考例句:
  • That is a summary and ironical end.那是一个具有概括性和讽刺意味的结局。
  • From his general demeanour I didn't get the impression that he was being ironical.从他整体的行为来看,我不觉得他是在讲反话。
34 simplicity Vryyv     
n.简单,简易;朴素;直率,单纯
参考例句:
  • She dressed with elegant simplicity.她穿着朴素高雅。
  • The beauty of this plan is its simplicity.简明扼要是这个计划的一大特点。
35 herded a8990e20e0204b4b90e89c841c5d57bf     
群集,纠结( herd的过去式和过去分词 ); 放牧; (使)向…移动
参考例句:
  • He herded up his goats. 他把山羊赶拢在一起。
  • They herded into the corner. 他们往角落里聚集。
36 utterly ZfpzM1     
adv.完全地,绝对地
参考例句:
  • Utterly devoted to the people,he gave his life in saving his patients.他忠于人民,把毕生精力用于挽救患者的生命。
  • I was utterly ravished by the way she smiled.她的微笑使我完全陶醉了。
37 ripple isLyh     
n.涟波,涟漪,波纹,粗钢梳;vt.使...起涟漪,使起波纹; vi.呈波浪状,起伏前进
参考例句:
  • The pebble made a ripple on the surface of the lake.石子在湖面上激起一个涟漪。
  • The small ripple split upon the beach.小小的涟漪卷来,碎在沙滩上。
38 chuckle Tr1zZ     
vi./n.轻声笑,咯咯笑
参考例句:
  • He shook his head with a soft chuckle.他轻轻地笑着摇了摇头。
  • I couldn't suppress a soft chuckle at the thought of it.想到这个,我忍不住轻轻地笑起来。
39 malevolent G8IzV     
adj.有恶意的,恶毒的
参考例句:
  • Why are they so malevolent to me?他们为什么对我如此恶毒?
  • We must thwart his malevolent schemes.我们决不能让他的恶毒阴谋得逞。
40 ripples 10e54c54305aebf3deca20a1472f4b96     
逐渐扩散的感觉( ripple的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • The moon danced on the ripples. 月亮在涟漪上舞动。
  • The sea leaves ripples on the sand. 海水在沙滩上留下了波痕。
41 taut iUazb     
adj.拉紧的,绷紧的,紧张的
参考例句:
  • The bowstring is stretched taut.弓弦绷得很紧。
  • Scarlett's taut nerves almost cracked as a sudden noise sounded in the underbrush near them. 思嘉紧张的神经几乎一下绷裂了,因为她听见附近灌木丛中突然冒出的一个声音。
42 ecstasy 9kJzY     
n.狂喜,心醉神怡,入迷
参考例句:
  • He listened to the music with ecstasy.他听音乐听得入了神。
  • Speechless with ecstasy,the little boys gazed at the toys.小孩注视着那些玩具,高兴得说不出话来。
43 cascades 6a84598b241e2c2051459650eb88013f     
倾泻( cascade的名词复数 ); 小瀑布(尤指一连串瀑布中的一支); 瀑布状物; 倾泻(或涌出)的东西
参考例句:
  • The river fell in a series of cascades down towards the lake. 河形成阶梯状瀑布泻入湖中。
  • Turning into the sun, he began the long, winding drive through the Cascades. 现在他朝着太阳驶去,开始了穿越喀斯喀特山脉的漫长而曲折的路程。 来自英汉文学 - 廊桥遗梦
44 hiss 2yJy9     
v.发出嘶嘶声;发嘘声表示不满
参考例句:
  • We can hear the hiss of air escaping from a tire.我们能听到一只轮胎的嘶嘶漏气声。
  • Don't hiss at the speaker.不要嘘演讲人。
45 ruffled e4a3deb720feef0786be7d86b0004e86     
adj. 有褶饰边的, 起皱的 动词ruffle的过去式和过去分词
参考例句:
  • She ruffled his hair affectionately. 她情意绵绵地拨弄着他的头发。
  • All this talk of a strike has clearly ruffled the management's feathers. 所有这些关于罢工的闲言碎语显然让管理层很不高兴。
46 confession 8Ygye     
n.自白,供认,承认
参考例句:
  • Her confession was simply tantamount to a casual explanation.她的自白简直等于一篇即席说明。
  • The police used torture to extort a confession from him.警察对他用刑逼供。
47 maturity 47nzh     
n.成熟;完成;(支票、债券等)到期
参考例句:
  • These plants ought to reach maturity after five years.这些植物五年后就该长成了。
  • This is the period at which the body attains maturity.这是身体发育成熟的时期。
48 perfectly 8Mzxb     
adv.完美地,无可非议地,彻底地
参考例句:
  • The witnesses were each perfectly certain of what they said.证人们个个对自己所说的话十分肯定。
  • Everything that we're doing is all perfectly above board.我们做的每件事情都是光明正大的。
49 worthy vftwB     
adj.(of)值得的,配得上的;有价值的
参考例句:
  • I did not esteem him to be worthy of trust.我认为他不值得信赖。
  • There occurred nothing that was worthy to be mentioned.没有值得一提的事发生。
50 bent QQ8yD     
n.爱好,癖好;adj.弯的;决心的,一心的
参考例句:
  • He was fully bent upon the project.他一心扑在这项计划上。
  • We bent over backward to help them.我们尽了最大努力帮助他们。
51 winding Ue7z09     
n.绕,缠,绕组,线圈
参考例句:
  • A winding lane led down towards the river.一条弯弯曲曲的小路通向河边。
  • The winding trail caused us to lose our orientation.迂回曲折的小道使我们迷失了方向。
52 decided lvqzZd     
adj.决定了的,坚决的;明显的,明确的
参考例句:
  • This gave them a decided advantage over their opponents.这使他们比对手具有明显的优势。
  • There is a decided difference between British and Chinese way of greeting.英国人和中国人打招呼的方式有很明显的区别。
53 pebble c3Rzo     
n.卵石,小圆石
参考例句:
  • The bird mistook the pebble for egg and tried to hatch it.这只鸟错把卵石当蛋,想去孵它。
  • The pebble made a ripple on the surface of the lake.石子在湖面上激起一个涟漪。
54 superstitions bf6d10d6085a510f371db29a9b4f8c2f     
迷信,迷信行为( superstition的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • Old superstitions seem incredible to educated people. 旧的迷信对于受过教育的人来说是不可思议的。
  • Do away with all fetishes and superstitions. 破除一切盲目崇拜和迷信。
55 awfully MPkym     
adv.可怕地,非常地,极端地
参考例句:
  • Agriculture was awfully neglected in the past.过去农业遭到严重忽视。
  • I've been feeling awfully bad about it.对这我一直感到很难受。
56 spun kvjwT     
v.纺,杜撰,急转身
参考例句:
  • His grandmother spun him a yarn at the fire.他奶奶在火炉边给他讲故事。
  • Her skilful fingers spun the wool out to a fine thread.她那灵巧的手指把羊毛纺成了细毛线。
57 contemplate PaXyl     
vt.盘算,计议;周密考虑;注视,凝视
参考例句:
  • The possibility of war is too horrifying to contemplate.战争的可能性太可怕了,真不堪细想。
  • The consequences would be too ghastly to contemplate.后果不堪设想。
58 unwillingly wjjwC     
adv.不情愿地
参考例句:
  • He submitted unwillingly to his mother. 他不情愿地屈服于他母亲。
  • Even when I call, he receives unwillingly. 即使我登门拜访,他也是很不情愿地接待我。
59 deliberately Gulzvq     
adv.审慎地;蓄意地;故意地
参考例句:
  • The girl gave the show away deliberately.女孩故意泄露秘密。
  • They deliberately shifted off the argument.他们故意回避这个论点。
60 retrospect xDeys     
n.回顾,追溯;v.回顾,回想,追溯
参考例句:
  • One's school life seems happier in retrospect than in reality.学校生活回忆起来显得比实际上要快乐。
  • In retrospect,it's easy to see why we were wrong.回顾过去就很容易明白我们的错处了。
61 adventurous LKryn     
adj.爱冒险的;惊心动魄的,惊险的,刺激的 
参考例句:
  • I was filled with envy at their adventurous lifestyle.我很羨慕他们敢于冒险的生活方式。
  • He was predestined to lead an adventurous life.他注定要过冒险的生活。
62 prey g1czH     
n.被掠食者,牺牲者,掠食;v.捕食,掠夺,折磨
参考例句:
  • Stronger animals prey on weaker ones.弱肉强食。
  • The lion was hunting for its prey.狮子在寻找猎物。
63 antagonism bwHzL     
n.对抗,敌对,对立
参考例句:
  • People did not feel a strong antagonism for established policy.人们没有对既定方针产生强烈反应。
  • There is still much antagonism between trades unions and the oil companies.工会和石油公司之间仍然存在着相当大的敌意。
64 cynical Dnbz9     
adj.(对人性或动机)怀疑的,不信世道向善的
参考例句:
  • The enormous difficulty makes him cynical about the feasibility of the idea.由于困难很大,他对这个主意是否可行持怀疑态度。
  • He was cynical that any good could come of democracy.他不相信民主会带来什么好处。
65 brutal bSFyb     
adj.残忍的,野蛮的,不讲理的
参考例句:
  • She has to face the brutal reality.她不得不去面对冷酷的现实。
  • They're brutal people behind their civilised veneer.他们表面上温文有礼,骨子里却是野蛮残忍。
66 scents 9d41e056b814c700bf06c9870b09a332     
n.香水( scent的名词复数 );气味;(动物的)臭迹;(尤指狗的)嗅觉
参考例句:
  • The air was fragrant with scents from the sea and the hills. 空气中荡漾着山和海的芬芳气息。
  • The winds came down with scents of the grass and wild flowers. 微风送来阵阵青草和野花的香气。 来自《简明英汉词典》
67 touching sg6zQ9     
adj.动人的,使人感伤的
参考例句:
  • It was a touching sight.这是一幅动人的景象。
  • His letter was touching.他的信很感人。
68 swelling OUzzd     
n.肿胀
参考例句:
  • Use ice to reduce the swelling. 用冰敷消肿。
  • There is a marked swelling of the lymph nodes. 淋巴结处有明显的肿块。
69 piquancy 17ffe2d09b3a59945bf767af8e3aa79c     
n.辛辣,辣味,痛快
参考例句:
  • The tart flavour of the cranberries adds piquancy. 越橘的酸味很可口。
  • I`ve got a GOOD start,or at least,a piquancy start. 我有了一个好的开始;如果不算好,也至少是个痛快的开始。 来自互联网
70 dismal wtwxa     
adj.阴沉的,凄凉的,令人忧郁的,差劲的
参考例句:
  • That is a rather dismal melody.那是一支相当忧郁的歌曲。
  • My prospects of returning to a suitable job are dismal.我重新找到一个合适的工作岗位的希望很渺茫。
71 maternal 57Azi     
adj.母亲的,母亲般的,母系的,母方的
参考例句:
  • He is my maternal uncle.他是我舅舅。
  • The sight of the hopeless little boy aroused her maternal instincts.那个绝望的小男孩的模样唤起了她的母性。


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