“What does it mean? The child’s dismissed his school.”
She gave me a look that I remarked at the moment; then, visibly, with a quick blankness, seemed to try to take it back. “But aren’t they all—?”
“Sent home—yes. But only for the holidays. Miles may never go back at all.”
Consciously, under my attention, she reddened. “They won’t take him?”
“They absolutely decline.”
At this she raised her eyes, which she had turned from me; I saw them fill with good tears. “What has he done?”
I hesitated; then I judged best simply to hand her my letter—which, however, had the effect of making her, without taking it, simply put her hands behind her. She shook her head sadly. “Such things are not for me, miss.”
My counselor7 couldn’t read! I winced8 at my mistake, which I attenuated9 as I could, and opened my letter again to repeat it to her; then, faltering10 in the act and folding it up once more, I put it back in my pocket. “Is he really bad?”
The tears were still in her eyes. “Do the gentlemen say so?”
“They go into no particulars. They simply express their regret that it should be impossible to keep him. That can have only one meaning.” Mrs. Grose listened with dumb emotion; she forbore to ask me what this meaning might be; so that, presently, to put the thing with some coherence11 and with the mere12 aid of her presence to my own mind, I went on: “That he’s an injury to the others.”
At this, with one of the quick turns of simple folk, she suddenly flamed up. “Master Miles! him an injury?”
There was such a flood of good faith in it that, though I had not yet seen the child, my very fears made me jump to the absurdity13 of the idea. I found myself, to meet my friend the better, offering it, on the spot, sarcastically14. “To his poor little innocent mates!”
“It’s too dreadful,” cried Mrs. Grose, “to say such cruel things! Why, he’s scarce ten years old.”
“Yes, yes; it would be incredible.”
She was evidently grateful for such a profession. “See him, miss, first. Then believe it!” I felt forthwith a new impatience15 to see him; it was the beginning of a curiosity that, for all the next hours, was to deepen almost to pain. Mrs. Grose was aware, I could judge, of what she had produced in me, and she followed it up with assurance. “You might as well believe it of the little lady. Bless her,” she added the next moment—“look at her!”
I turned and saw that Flora, whom, ten minutes before, I had established in the schoolroom with a sheet of white paper, a pencil, and a copy of nice “round O’s,” now presented herself to view at the open door. She expressed in her little way an extraordinary detachment from disagreeable duties, looking to me, however, with a great childish light that seemed to offer it as a mere result of the affection she had conceived for my person, which had rendered necessary that she should follow me. I needed nothing more than this to feel the full force of Mrs. Grose’s comparison, and, catching16 my pupil in my arms, covered her with kisses in which there was a sob17 of atonement.
Nonetheless, the rest of the day I watched for further occasion to approach my colleague, especially as, toward evening, I began to fancy she rather sought to avoid me. I overtook her, I remember, on the staircase; we went down together, and at the bottom I detained her, holding her there with a hand on her arm. “I take what you said to me at noon as a declaration that you’ve never known him to be bad.”
She threw back her head; she had clearly, by this time, and very honestly, adopted an attitude. “Oh, never known him—I don’t pretend that!”
I was upset again. “Then you have known him—?”
“Yes indeed, miss, thank God!”
On reflection I accepted this. “You mean that a boy who never is—?”
“Is no boy for me!”
I held her tighter. “You like them with the spirit to be naughty?” Then, keeping pace with her answer, “So do I!” I eagerly brought out. “But not to the degree to contaminate—”
She stared, taking my meaning in; but it produced in her an odd laugh. “Are you afraid he’ll corrupt you?” She put the question with such a fine bold humor that, with a laugh, a little silly doubtless, to match her own, I gave way for the time to the apprehension of ridicule19.
But the next day, as the hour for my drive approached, I cropped up in another place. “What was the lady who was here before?”
“The last governess? She was also young and pretty—almost as young and almost as pretty, miss, even as you.”
“Ah, then, I hope her youth and her beauty helped her!” I recollect20 throwing off. “He seems to like us young and pretty!”
“Oh, he did,” Mrs. Grose assented21: “it was the way he liked everyone!” She had no sooner spoken indeed than she caught herself up. “I mean that’s his way—the master’s.”
I was struck. “But of whom did you speak first?”
She looked blank, but she colored. “Why, of him.”
“Of the master?”
“Of who else?”
There was so obviously no one else that the next moment I had lost my impression of her having accidentally said more than she meant; and I merely asked what I wanted to know. “Did she see anything in the boy—?”
“That wasn’t right? She never told me.”
Mrs. Grose appeared to try to be conscientious23. “About some things—yes.”
“But not about all?”
Again she considered. “Well, miss—she’s gone. I won’t tell tales.”
“I quite understand your feeling,” I hastened to reply; but I thought it, after an instant, not opposed to this concession24 to pursue: “Did she die here?”
“No—she went off.”
I don’t know what there was in this brevity of Mrs. Grose’s that struck me as ambiguous. “Went off to die?” Mrs. Grose looked straight out of the window, but I felt that, hypothetically, I had a right to know what young persons engaged for Bly were expected to do. “She was taken ill, you mean, and went home?”
“She was not taken ill, so far as appeared, in this house. She left it, at the end of the year, to go home, as she said, for a short holiday, to which the time she had put in had certainly given her a right. We had then a young woman—a nursemaid who had stayed on and who was a good girl and clever; and she took the children altogether for the interval25. But our young lady never came back, and at the very moment I was expecting her I heard from the master that she was dead.”
I turned this over. “But of what?”
“He never told me! But please, miss,” said Mrs. Grose, “I must get to my work.”
点击收听单词发音
1 flora | |
n.(某一地区的)植物群 | |
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2 reassuring | |
a.使人消除恐惧和疑虑的,使人放心的 | |
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3 apprehension | |
n.理解,领悟;逮捕,拘捕;忧虑 | |
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4 sleepless | |
adj.不睡眠的,睡不著的,不休息的 | |
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5 distress | |
n.苦恼,痛苦,不舒适;不幸;vt.使悲痛 | |
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6 determined | |
adj.坚定的;有决心的 | |
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7 counselor | |
n.顾问,法律顾问 | |
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8 winced | |
赶紧避开,畏缩( wince的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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9 attenuated | |
v.(使)变细( attenuate的过去式和过去分词 );(使)变薄;(使)变小;减弱 | |
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10 faltering | |
犹豫的,支吾的,蹒跚的 | |
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11 coherence | |
n.紧凑;连贯;一致性 | |
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12 mere | |
adj.纯粹的;仅仅,只不过 | |
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13 absurdity | |
n.荒谬,愚蠢;谬论 | |
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14 sarcastically | |
adv.挖苦地,讽刺地 | |
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15 impatience | |
n.不耐烦,急躁 | |
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16 catching | |
adj.易传染的,有魅力的,迷人的,接住 | |
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17 sob | |
n.空间轨道的轰炸机;呜咽,哭泣 | |
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18 corrupt | |
v.贿赂,收买;adj.腐败的,贪污的 | |
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19 ridicule | |
v.讥讽,挖苦;n.嘲弄 | |
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20 recollect | |
v.回忆,想起,记起,忆起,记得 | |
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21 assented | |
同意,赞成( assent的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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22 scruple | |
n./v.顾忌,迟疑 | |
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23 conscientious | |
adj.审慎正直的,认真的,本着良心的 | |
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24 concession | |
n.让步,妥协;特许(权) | |
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25 interval | |
n.间隔,间距;幕间休息,中场休息 | |
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