I. THAT OF MR. JUSTICE DEAR.

 "'Tis really very, very queer!"

Ejaculated Justice Dear,

"That, day by day, I'm sitting here

Without a single 'case.'

This is the twenty-second pair

Of white kid gloves, I do declare,

I've had this month. I can not wear

White kids at such a pace."

 

His Lordship thought the matter o'er.

"Crimes ne'er have been so few before;

Not long ago, I heard a score

Of charges every day;

And now—dear me! how can it be?—

And, pondering thus, went home to tea.

(He lives Bayswater way.)

A frugal¹ mind has Justice Dear

(Indeed, I've heard folks call him "near"),

And, caring naught² for jibe³ or jeer⁴,

He rides home on a bus.

It singularly came to pass,

This day, he chanced to ride, alas⁵!

Beside two of the burglar class;

And one addressed him thus:

"We knows yer, Mr. Justice Dear,

You've often giv' us 'time'—d'ye hear?—

And now your pitch we're going to queer,

We criminals has struck!

We're on the 'honest livin' tack⁶,

An' not another crib we'll crack,

So Justices will get the sack!

How's that, my legal buck⁷?"

This gave his Lordship quite a fright,

He had not viewed it in that light.

"Dear me!" he thought, "these men are right,

I'd better smooth them down.

"Let's not fall out, my friends," said he,

"Continue with your burglarie;

Your point of view I clearly see.

Ahem! Here's half-a-crown."

 

The morning sun shone bright and clear

On angry Mr. Justice Dear;

His language was not good to hear;

With rage he'd like to burst.

His watch and chain, and several rings,

His silver-plate, and other things,

Had disappeared on magic wings—

They'd burgled his house first!

1 frugal   

adj.节俭的，节约的，少量的，微量的

参考例句：

• He was a VIP,but he had a frugal life.他是位要人，但生活俭朴。
• The old woman is frugal to the extreme.那老妇人节约到了极点。

2 naught   

n.无，零 [=nought]

参考例句：

• He sets at naught every convention of society.他轻视所有的社会习俗。
• I hope that all your efforts won't go for naught.我希望你的努力不会毫无结果。

3 jibe   

v.嘲笑，与...一致，使转向；n.嘲笑，嘲弄

参考例句：

• Perhaps I should withdraw my jibe about hot air.或许我应当收回对热火朝天的嘲笑。
• What he says does not jibe with what others say.他所说的与其他人说的不一致。

4 jeer   

vi.嘲弄，揶揄；vt.奚落；n.嘲笑，讥评

参考例句：

• Do not jeer at the mistakes or misfortunes of others.不要嘲笑别人的错误或不幸。
• The children liked to jeer at the awkward students.孩子们喜欢嘲笑笨拙的学生。

5 alas   

int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等)

参考例句：

• Alas!The window is broken!哎呀！窗子破了！
• Alas,the truth is less romantic.然而，真理很少带有浪漫色彩。

6 tack   

n.大头钉；假缝，粗缝

参考例句：

• He is hammering a tack into the wall to hang a picture.他正往墙上钉一枚平头钉用来挂画。
• We are going to tack the map on the wall.我们打算把这张地图钉在墙上。

7 buck   

n.雄鹿，雄兔；v.马离地跳跃

参考例句：

• The boy bent curiously to the skeleton of the buck.这个男孩好奇地弯下身去看鹿的骸骨。
• The female deer attracts the buck with high-pitched sounds.雌鹿以尖声吸引雄鹿。