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首页 » 英文短篇小说 » Confessions of an English Opium-Eater » PART II From the London Magazine for October 1821.
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PART II From the London Magazine for October 1821.
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 So then, Oxford1 Street, stony-hearted step-mother! thou that listenest to the sighs of orphans2 and drinkest the tears of children, at length I was dismissed from thee; the time was come at last that I no more should pace in anguish3 thy never-ending terraces, no more should dream and wake in captivity4 to the pangs5 of hunger.  Successors too many, to myself and Ann, have doubtless since then trodden in our footsteps, inheritors of our calamities6; other orphans than Ann have sighed; tears have been shed by other children; and thou, Oxford Street, hast since doubtless echoed to the groans7 of innumerable hearts.  For myself, however, the storm which I had outlived seemed to have been the pledge of a long fair-weather—the premature8 sufferings which I had paid down to have been accepted as a ransom9 for many years to come, as a price of long immunity10 from sorrow; and if again I walked in London a solitary11 and contemplative man (as oftentimes I did), I walked for the most part in serenity12 and peace of mind.  And although it is true that the calamities of my noviciate in London had struck root so deeply in my bodily constitution, that afterwards they shot up and flourished afresh, and grew into a noxious13 umbrage14 that has overshadowed and darkened my latter years, yet these second assaults of suffering were met with a fortitude15 more confirmed, with the resources of a maturer intellect, and with alleviations from sympathising affection—how deep and tender!
 
Thus, however, with whatsoever16 alleviations, years that were far asunder17 were bound together by subtle links of suffering derived18 from a common root.  And herein I notice an instance of the short-sightedness of human desires, that oftentimes on moonlight nights, during my first mournful abode19 in London, my consolation20 was (if such it could be thought) to gaze from Oxford Street up every avenue in succession which pierces through the heart of Marylebone to the fields and the woods; for that, said I, travelling with my eyes up the long vistas21 which lay part in light and part in shade, “that is the road to the North, and therefore to, and if I had the wings of a dove, that way I would fly for comfort.”  Thus I said, and thus I wished, in my blindness.  Yet even in that very northern region it was, even in that very valley, nay22, in that very house to which my erroneous wishes pointed23, that this second birth of my sufferings began, and that they again threatened to besiege24 the citadel25 of life and hope.  There it was that for years I was persecuted26 by visions as ugly, and as ghastly phantoms27 as ever haunted the couch of an Orestes; and in this unhappier than he, that sleep, which comes to all as a respite28 and a restoration, and to him especially as a blessed {7} balm for his wounded heart and his haunted brain, visited me as my bitterest scourge29.  Thus blind was I in my desires; yet if a veil interposes between the dim-sightedness of man and his future calamities, the same veil hides from him their alleviations, and a grief which had not been feared is met by consolations30 which had not been hoped.  I therefore, who participated, as it were, in the troubles of Orestes (excepting only in his agitated31 conscience), participated no less in all his supports.  My Eumenides, like his, were at my bed-feet, and stared in upon me through the curtains; but watching by my pillow, or defrauding32 herself of sleep to bear me company through the heavy watches of the night, sate33 my Electra; for thou, beloved M., dear companion of my later years, thou wast my Electra! and neither in nobility of mind nor in long-suffering affection wouldst permit that a Grecian sister should excel an English wife.  For thou thoughtest not much to stoop to humble34 offices of kindness and to servile {8} ministrations of tenderest affection—to wipe away for years the unwholesome dews upon the forehead, or to refresh the lips when parched35 and baked with fever; nor even when thy own peaceful slumbers36 had by long sympathy become infected with the spectacle of my dread37 contest with phantoms and shadowy enemies that oftentimes bade me “sleep no more!”—not even then didst thou utter a complaint or any murmur38, nor withdraw thy angelic smiles, nor shrink from thy service of love, more than Electra did of old.  For she too, though she was a Grecian woman, and the daughter of the king {9} of men, yet wept sometimes, and hid her face {10} in her robe.
 
But these troubles are past; and thou wilt39 read records of a period so dolorous40 to us both as the legend of some hideous41 dream that can return no more.  Meantime, I am again in London, and again I pace the terraces of Oxford Street by night; and oftentimes, when I am oppressed by anxieties that demand all my philosophy and the comfort of thy presence to support, and yet remember that I am separated from thee by three hundred miles and the length of three dreary42 months, I look up the streets that run northwards from Oxford Street, upon moonlight nights, and recollect43 my youthful ejaculation of anguish; and remembering that thou art sitting alone in that same valley, and mistress of that very house to which my heart turned in its blindness nineteen years ago, I think that, though blind indeed, and scattered44 to the winds of late, the promptings of my heart may yet have had reference to a remoter time, and may be justified45 if read in another meaning; and if I could allow myself to descend46 again to the impotent wishes of childhood, I should again say to myself, as I look to the North, “Oh, that I had the wings of a dove—” and with how just a confidence in thy good and gracious nature might I add the other half of my early ejaculation—“And that way I would fly for comfort!”

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1 Oxford Wmmz0a     
n.牛津(英国城市)
参考例句:
  • At present he has become a Professor of Chemistry at Oxford.他现在已是牛津大学的化学教授了。
  • This is where the road to Oxford joins the road to London.这是去牛津的路与去伦敦的路的汇合处。
2 orphans edf841312acedba480123c467e505b2a     
孤儿( orphan的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • The poor orphans were kept on short commons. 贫苦的孤儿们吃不饱饭。
  • Their uncle was declared guardian to the orphans. 这些孤儿的叔父成为他们的监护人。
3 anguish awZz0     
n.(尤指心灵上的)极度痛苦,烦恼
参考例句:
  • She cried out for anguish at parting.分手时,她由于痛苦而失声大哭。
  • The unspeakable anguish wrung his heart.难言的痛苦折磨着他的心。
4 captivity qrJzv     
n.囚禁;被俘;束缚
参考例句:
  • A zoo is a place where live animals are kept in captivity for the public to see.动物园是圈养动物以供公众观看的场所。
  • He was held in captivity for three years.他被囚禁叁年。
5 pangs 90e966ce71191d0a90f6fec2265e2758     
突然的剧痛( pang的名词复数 ); 悲痛
参考例句:
  • She felt sudden pangs of regret. 她突然感到痛悔不已。
  • With touching pathos he described the pangs of hunger. 他以极具感伤力的笔触描述了饥饿的痛苦。
6 calamities 16254f2ca47292404778d1804949fef6     
n.灾祸,灾难( calamity的名词复数 );不幸之事
参考例句:
  • They will only triumph by persevering in their struggle against natural calamities. 他们只有坚持与自然灾害搏斗,才能取得胜利。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
  • One moment's false security can bring a century of calamities. 图一时之苟安,贻百年之大患。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
7 groans 41bd40c1aa6a00b4445e6420ff52b6ad     
n.呻吟,叹息( groan的名词复数 );呻吟般的声音v.呻吟( groan的第三人称单数 );发牢骚;抱怨;受苦
参考例句:
  • There were loud groans when he started to sing. 他刚开始歌唱时有人发出了很大的嘘声。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • It was a weird old house, full of creaks and groans. 这是所神秘而可怕的旧宅,到处嘎吱嘎吱作响。 来自《简明英汉词典》
8 premature FPfxV     
adj.比预期时间早的;不成熟的,仓促的
参考例句:
  • It is yet premature to predict the possible outcome of the dialogue.预言这次对话可能有什么结果为时尚早。
  • The premature baby is doing well.那个早产的婴儿很健康。
9 ransom tTYx9     
n.赎金,赎身;v.赎回,解救
参考例句:
  • We'd better arrange the ransom right away.我们最好马上把索取赎金的事安排好。
  • The kidnappers exacted a ransom of 10000 from the family.绑架者向这家人家勒索10000英镑的赎金。
10 immunity dygyQ     
n.优惠;免除;豁免,豁免权
参考例句:
  • The law gives public schools immunity from taxation.法律免除公立学校的纳税义务。
  • He claims diplomatic immunity to avoid being arrested.他要求外交豁免以便避免被捕。
11 solitary 7FUyx     
adj.孤独的,独立的,荒凉的;n.隐士
参考例句:
  • I am rather fond of a solitary stroll in the country.我颇喜欢在乡间独自徜徉。
  • The castle rises in solitary splendour on the fringe of the desert.这座城堡巍然耸立在沙漠的边际,显得十分壮美。
12 serenity fEzzz     
n.宁静,沉着,晴朗
参考例句:
  • Her face,though sad,still evoked a feeling of serenity.她的脸色虽然悲伤,但仍使人感觉安详。
  • She escaped to the comparative serenity of the kitchen.她逃到相对安静的厨房里。
13 noxious zHOxB     
adj.有害的,有毒的;使道德败坏的,讨厌的
参考例句:
  • Heavy industry pollutes our rivers with noxious chemicals.重工业产生的有毒化学品会污染我们的河流。
  • Many household products give off noxious fumes.很多家用产品散发有害气体。
14 umbrage rg7yD     
n.不快;树荫
参考例句:
  • Everything gives umbrage to a tyrantny.所有事情都使专制君主生气。
  • She took umbrage at my remarks about her hair.我对她头发的评论使她很不高兴。
15 fortitude offzz     
n.坚忍不拔;刚毅
参考例句:
  • His dauntless fortitude makes him absolutely fearless.他不屈不挠的坚韧让他绝无恐惧。
  • He bore the pain with great fortitude.他以极大的毅力忍受了痛苦。
16 whatsoever Beqz8i     
adv.(用于否定句中以加强语气)任何;pron.无论什么
参考例句:
  • There's no reason whatsoever to turn down this suggestion.没有任何理由拒绝这个建议。
  • All things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you,do ye even so to them.你想别人对你怎样,你就怎样对人。
17 asunder GVkzU     
adj.分离的,化为碎片
参考例句:
  • The curtains had been drawn asunder.窗帘被拉向两边。
  • Your conscience,conviction,integrity,and loyalties were torn asunder.你的良心、信念、正直和忠诚都被扯得粉碎了。
18 derived 6cddb7353e699051a384686b6b3ff1e2     
vi.起源;由来;衍生;导出v.得到( derive的过去式和过去分词 );(从…中)得到获得;源于;(从…中)提取
参考例句:
  • Many English words are derived from Latin and Greek. 英语很多词源出于拉丁文和希腊文。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • He derived his enthusiasm for literature from his father. 他对文学的爱好是受他父亲的影响。 来自《简明英汉词典》
19 abode hIby0     
n.住处,住所
参考例句:
  • It was ten months before my father discovered his abode.父亲花了十个月的功夫,才好不容易打听到他的住处。
  • Welcome to our humble abode!欢迎光临寒舍!
20 consolation WpbzC     
n.安慰,慰问
参考例句:
  • The children were a great consolation to me at that time.那时孩子们成了我的莫大安慰。
  • This news was of little consolation to us.这个消息对我们来说没有什么安慰。
21 vistas cec5d496e70afb756a935bba3530d3e8     
长条形景色( vista的名词复数 ); 回顾; 展望; (未来可能发生的)一系列情景
参考例句:
  • This new job could open up whole new vistas for her. 这项新工作可能给她开辟全新的前景。
  • The picture is small but It'shows broad vistas. 画幅虽然不大,所表现的天地却十分广阔。
22 nay unjzAQ     
adv.不;n.反对票,投反对票者
参考例句:
  • He was grateful for and proud of his son's remarkable,nay,unique performance.他为儿子出色的,不,应该是独一无二的表演心怀感激和骄傲。
  • Long essays,nay,whole books have been written on this.许多长篇大论的文章,不,应该说是整部整部的书都是关于这件事的。
23 pointed Il8zB4     
adj.尖的,直截了当的
参考例句:
  • He gave me a very sharp pointed pencil.他给我一支削得非常尖的铅笔。
  • She wished to show Mrs.John Dashwood by this pointed invitation to her brother.她想通过对达茨伍德夫人提出直截了当的邀请向她的哥哥表示出来。
24 besiege tomyS     
vt.包围,围攻,拥在...周围
参考例句:
  • The Afghan air force was using helicopters to supply the besieged town.阿富汗空军正用直升机向被围城镇提供补给。
  • She was besieged by the press and the public.她被媒体和公众纠缠不休。
25 citadel EVYy0     
n.城堡;堡垒;避难所
参考例句:
  • The citadel was solid.城堡是坚固的。
  • This citadel is built on high ground for protecting the city.这座城堡建于高处是为保护城市。
26 persecuted 2daa49e8c0ac1d04bf9c3650a3d486f3     
(尤指宗教或政治信仰的)迫害(~sb. for sth.)( persecute的过去式和过去分词 ); 烦扰,困扰或骚扰某人
参考例句:
  • Throughout history, people have been persecuted for their religious beliefs. 人们因宗教信仰而受迫害的情况贯穿了整个历史。
  • Members of these sects are ruthlessly persecuted and suppressed. 这些教派的成员遭到了残酷的迫害和镇压。
27 phantoms da058e0e11fdfb5165cb13d5ac01a2e8     
n.鬼怪,幽灵( phantom的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • They vanished down the stairs like two phantoms. 他们像两个幽灵似的消失在了楼下。 来自辞典例句
  • The horrible night that he had passed had left phantoms behind it. 他刚才度过的恐布之夜留下了种种错觉。 来自辞典例句
28 respite BWaxa     
n.休息,中止,暂缓
参考例句:
  • She was interrogated without respite for twenty-four hours.她被不间断地审问了二十四小时。
  • Devaluation would only give the economy a brief respite.贬值只能让经济得到暂时的缓解。
29 scourge FD2zj     
n.灾难,祸害;v.蹂躏
参考例句:
  • Smallpox was once the scourge of the world.天花曾是世界的大患。
  • The new boss was the scourge of the inefficient.新老板来了以后,不称职的人就遭殃了。
30 consolations 73df0eda2cb43ef5d4137bf180257e9b     
n.安慰,慰问( consolation的名词复数 );起安慰作用的人(或事物)
参考例句:
  • Recent history had washed away the easy consolations and the old formulas. 现代的历史已经把轻松的安慰和陈旧的公式一扫而光。 来自辞典例句
  • When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your consolations delight my soul. 诗94:19我心里多忧多疑、安慰我、使我欢乐。 来自互联网
31 agitated dzgzc2     
adj.被鼓动的,不安的
参考例句:
  • His answers were all mixed up,so agitated was he.他是那样心神不定,回答全乱了。
  • She was agitated because her train was an hour late.她乘坐的火车晚点一个小时,她十分焦虑。
32 defrauding f903d3f73034a10d2561b5f23b7b6bde     
v.诈取,骗取( defraud的现在分词 )
参考例句:
  • Second is the actor regards defrauding of the wealth as object. 第二,行为人以骗取钱财为目的。 来自互联网
  • Therefore, DELL has the motive and economic purpose of intentionally defrauding the Chinese consumers. 因此,戴尔公司存在故意欺诈中国消费者的动机和经济目的。 来自互联网
33 sate 2CszL     
v.使充分满足
参考例句:
  • Nothing could sate the careerist's greed for power.什么也满足不了这个野心家的权力欲。
  • I am sate with opera after listening to it for a whole weekend.听了整整一个周末的歌剧,我觉得腻了。
34 humble ddjzU     
adj.谦卑的,恭顺的;地位低下的;v.降低,贬低
参考例句:
  • In my humble opinion,he will win the election.依我拙见,他将在选举中获胜。
  • Defeat and failure make people humble.挫折与失败会使人谦卑。
35 parched 2mbzMK     
adj.焦干的;极渴的;v.(使)焦干
参考例句:
  • Hot winds parched the crops.热风使庄稼干透了。
  • The land in this region is rather dry and parched.这片土地十分干燥。
36 slumbers bc73f889820149a9ed406911856c4ce2     
睡眠,安眠( slumber的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • His image traversed constantly her restless slumbers. 他的形象一再闯进她的脑海,弄得她不能安睡。
  • My Titan brother slumbers deep inside his mountain prison. Go. 我的泰坦兄弟就被囚禁在山脉的深处。
37 dread Ekpz8     
vt.担忧,忧虑;惧怕,不敢;n.担忧,畏惧
参考例句:
  • We all dread to think what will happen if the company closes.我们都不敢去想一旦公司关门我们该怎么办。
  • Her heart was relieved of its blankest dread.她极度恐惧的心理消除了。
38 murmur EjtyD     
n.低语,低声的怨言;v.低语,低声而言
参考例句:
  • They paid the extra taxes without a murmur.他们毫无怨言地交了附加税。
  • There was a low murmur of conversation in the hall.大厅里有窃窃私语声。
39 wilt oMNz5     
v.(使)植物凋谢或枯萎;(指人)疲倦,衰弱
参考例句:
  • Golden roses do not wilt and will never need to be watered.金色的玫瑰不枯萎绝也不需要浇水。
  • Several sleepless nights made him wilt.数个不眠之夜使他憔悴。
40 dolorous k8Oym     
adj.悲伤的;忧愁的
参考例句:
  • With a broken-hearted smile,he lifted a pair of dolorous eyes.带著伤心的微笑,他抬起了一双痛苦的眼睛。
  • Perhaps love is a dolorous fairy tale.也许爱情是一部忧伤的童话。
41 hideous 65KyC     
adj.丑陋的,可憎的,可怕的,恐怖的
参考例句:
  • The whole experience had been like some hideous nightmare.整个经历就像一场可怕的噩梦。
  • They're not like dogs,they're hideous brutes.它们不像狗,是丑陋的畜牲。
42 dreary sk1z6     
adj.令人沮丧的,沉闷的,单调乏味的
参考例句:
  • They live such dreary lives.他们的生活如此乏味。
  • She was tired of hearing the same dreary tale of drunkenness and violence.她听够了那些关于酗酒和暴力的乏味故事。
43 recollect eUOxl     
v.回忆,想起,记起,忆起,记得
参考例句:
  • He tried to recollect things and drown himself in them.他极力回想过去的事情而沉浸于回忆之中。
  • She could not recollect being there.她回想不起曾经到过那儿。
44 scattered 7jgzKF     
adj.分散的,稀疏的;散步的;疏疏落落的
参考例句:
  • Gathering up his scattered papers,he pushed them into his case.他把散乱的文件收拾起来,塞进文件夹里。
45 justified 7pSzrk     
a.正当的,有理的
参考例句:
  • She felt fully justified in asking for her money back. 她认为有充分的理由要求退款。
  • The prisoner has certainly justified his claims by his actions. 那个囚犯确实已用自己的行动表明他的要求是正当的。
46 descend descend     
vt./vi.传下来,下来,下降
参考例句:
  • I hope the grace of God would descend on me.我期望上帝的恩惠。
  • We're not going to descend to such methods.我们不会沦落到使用这种手段。


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