"Okay, girls. Carry your suitcases and I'll give each of you an oxygen mask as you go out. The air's been breathable for fifteen years, but it's still thin to newcomers. If you feel dizzy, take a whiff of oxygen."
The forty women just stood there and looked at each other. Nobody wanted to be first.
Annie moved forward, her bulky suitcase practically floating in her hand. She was a big woman with that wholesome1 expression which some women have to substitute for sex appeal. She'd made a great senior leader at summer camps.
"I'll go first," she said, grinning confidence into the others. "I'm not likely to bring out the beast in them." She waved herself out, letting the grin set and jell.
It was odd to feel light. She'd felt too heavy as far back as she could remember. Not fat heavy. Bone heavy.
The sweat on her face dried suddenly. She could feel it, like something being peeled off her skin. Arid2 climate.
It was cold. But she had the warmth to meet it.
There they were! Forty men. There were supposed to be forty. What if one of them had died! Who would go back?
"Not me," Annie prayed to herself. "Dear God, not me." She tried to count them. But they moved around so!
It was Sally, with the blonde hair on her shoulders. That's all they'd be able to see from there. The blonde hair.
But a man was coming forward. He had a tam-like hat pulled low to good-humored eyes, and an easy stride.
"Wait, Ben," one of the other men said. "See the others."
"I pulled first, didn't I?"
"Yeah. But you ain't seen but two yet."
"I want that blonde one. Let Gary see the others."
And he led Sally away.
He didn't feel her muscles or look at her teeth or measure her pelvic span.
After Sally came Nora. Nora giggled4 and waved, making a shape under the shapeless clothes. Wasn't that just like Nora? Okay. So she was cute.
Second man took Nora. He didn't wait for the others.
Third man took Regina. Regina looked scared, but you could see those big cow eyes a mile off. Regina obviously needed somebody to protect her.
The other girls came out. Annie counted and her heart hit bottom. Someone was going to be left over.
Four women, three men. They all felt embarrassed. It was the kind of thing the colonists5 would talk about for years. Who was last. Who was second to last. Spiteful people would remember, and in a tight little community, spite took root and throve on the least misinterpreted expression or—But then, this wouldn't be a tight little community, Annie remembered. The lichen6 farms were spread out over the whole temperate7 belt of the world. Because the lichens8 were grown only on hills, where the sand would not cover them. And because they did a more efficient job of oxygenating the atmosphere when they were spread over a wide area.
One man, hat in hand, even in the cold. A little shriveled man with a spike9 of dust-colored hair, but kind-looking.
"Aw...." he drawled in embarrassment10. He clicked his tongue. "You're both probably too good for somebody like me. I don't know. Both fine women."
The two women stood in silence.
"What's your name?"
"Annie."
"Mary."
"Mary? My sister's named Mary. Fine woman." He took Mary's hand. "No disrespect to you, Annie."
They were all gone.
"I could take you on my Venus run," the pilot said. He, too, was embarrassed. "But I'm afraid I'll have a full ship after that. Unless you can buy the weight and space. I'd be glad to take you free. But the company...."
Annie's eyes were full but she wasn't going to let them spill.
Sally brought Ben by, already looking self-consciously married.
"I'm sorry, honey," she said. "Look, Annie, if you want to come stay with us until another shipment of pioneers come to break ground, you're welcome. Maybe you'd—er—find one of them you liked."
It was a gesture of kindness, of course, but it made Annie's eyes spill. She turned her head away, toward the red hills. Red and the cultivated ones green. Christmas colors.
"Thanks, kids," she said. "But I don't believe I'll try it. And don't worry. This isn't the first time I've been stood up."
"Are you coming?" the pilot shouted across the field. "Hate to rush you, but I've got a schedule to meet."
Was she coming? What else could she do?
"What happened to him, Ben?" Annie asked. "My—the other man that should have been here."
Ben worried a hole in the sand with one foot and cleared his throat. "He stayed home."
"You mean he's alive! Here?"
"Well ... yes. But he didn't—"
"Never mind. I don't need anybody to strum a guitar under my window. If he couldn't get away from the farm today I can certainly go to him. I've got a pair of legs that'll walk around the world."
"You coming?" the pilot shouted.
"No!" Annie cried. "I live here."
Ben was shuffling14 his feet, hands in his pockets. "We'd be proud to have you stay with us, Annie."
"Oh, cut it out, Ben. I'm no hot-house rose. Just tell me which way and I'll find my own farm." She paused, trying to guess his thoughts.
"You think he might be disappointed when he sees me? Is that it, Ben? I know I'm no pinup girl. But I'm a worker and a breeder. He'll see it. In the end, that's what's going to count."
Ben was still making holes in the sand with his feet, trying to say something.
"Please don't worry," Annie went on, "your friend won't be sorry. If he doesn't want to marry me right away—okay. I can understand it. But I can give him a chance to watch me work."
"That isn't it," Ben said finally. "I think you look fine, Annie. It's—it's any woman. He told them not to send a wife for him. Any woman."
"But that's ridiculous. He knows the laws. Five years and then a wife. Why did he stake out in the first place?"
"That was before," Ben answered.
"Before what?"
"Aw, it's not for me to say. Why don't you just forget Bradman. He's a good enough guy. But not for you. You come—"
"Which way and how far?"
Ben looked at her hard. "Okay. On Mars your life is your own." He pointed15. "Second farmbubble you come to. And you'd better hurry. It ought to take eight hours and night falls like a ton of bricks here."
Annie made it in seven. Easy.
She went up to the transparent16 hemisphere. He was inside working. She shouted, but if he heard her he didn't look up.
She went to the flap that must be the door. There wasn't anything to knock on, so she opened the flap and walked in.
There was nothing in the room but a cot, kitchen equipment and lichen, growing on a number of tables. The air was richer than outside and Annie breathed it thirstily.
"I'm Annie Strug," she said, smiling and wishing it wasn't such an ugly name.
He glanced up, angry blue eyes under a growth of black hair. He didn't say a word.
Annie set her suitcase down and looked out at the green growth on the hills.
"Look, Mr. Bradman," she cried suddenly, pointing a spatulate finger to the western horizon. "What in the name of heaven is that?" There was a catch of fright in her voice.
"We don't say 'mister' on Mars," he said reluctantly. "Brady. But you don't have to call me anything because you're leaving soon." He was a big, arid man with a sandy voice. But his hands, as he stripped the lumpy brown fruits from a giant lichen, were surprisingly delicate.
"What is it?" Annie asked again, turning instinctively20 to the big man for a reassurance21 and protection she had no reason to expect.
Bradman straightened and moved away from her, looking at the black giant growing up from the earth in the distance and moving straight toward them.
"It's a sandstorm," he said. "It'll be here in ten minutes."
Annie let out the breath she had been holding. "Oh. That doesn't sound so bad. I don't know what I thought it was. I was just frightened." She smiled shyly and apologetically at Bradman.
Bradman grimaced22 at her, his agate24 eyes frozen in a pallid25 face that should have gone with red hair. The sand-blown lines in his face were cruel. "Sister, you've got a smile like a slab26 of concrete. Don't try it again."
"You didn't have to say that," Annie said quietly, closing her eyes against the winds of her anger.
"You didn't have to come here," he replied. "Goodbye."
"I'm not leaving," she said, still holding tight the doors of her anger.
"I am." He paced heavily over the sand floor and pulled back the flap of the door.
"Where are you going?" Annie glanced back at the towering giant, now glowing red in the sunlight, like some huge, grotesque27 devil.
"Into the storm cellar. Nobody lives through a Martian sandstorm."
Annie ran after him. "For God's sake take me with you! You can't leave me...."
"Mine's built for one," he said, and pulled the top in over him as he disappeared into the hole.
Annie broke her fingernails pulling at the cover. The wind was blowing sand in her eyes. She saw blood staining the rim23 of her index finger. She pounded with her fists.
"Let me in!" she screamed. "In the name of God!" But all she heard was the keening sand in the wind.
It made her angry.
"I'll fight it," she screamed. "By God, I'll fight!"
Five minutes, she guessed. Maybe five minutes left. She ran into the house, ripped open her suitcase. Bundles of nylon marriage clothes. She began to sob29. Some were with lace.
"Fight!" she shouted to herself. There was her oxygen mask. How much oxygen? Anybody's guess. It was made for maybe a few whiffs a day over a period of several months.
Wrap in nylon nightgowns? Ridiculous.
Spacesuit?
Annie went through the one-room house as fast as she could. No spacesuit. Why should he have one?
Three minutes left.
It was possible she would simply be buried.
The refrigerator!
That wasn't a refrigerator. Only a cabinet, loosely joined.
Annie went outside, on the side where the field of lichens grew up a smooth, stone hill. The red devil was whistling at her now; a low, insinuating32 whistle.
Something rattled33 faintly against one steel rib34 of the hemisphere. It was a shrub35, about five feet tall.
Annie began to laugh hysterically36. Brady had protected the shrub with loving care. It was tied to the steel rib through grommetted holes in the hemisphere, and covered with its own plastic bag to shield off the wind.
One minute.
The red devil was shouting now, laughing with triumph. He ran his sandy fingers through her hair and blew his gritty breath in her eyes.
She pulled the zipper38 at the bottom of the polyethylene bag that covered the shrub and yanked the bag off. It was heavy, almost oily plastic, slippery and pliant39.
There was no time to decide whether it would be better inside or outside the house. She pulled the bag over her head inside out, so the zipper would close completely. Then she folded the zipper part under once and wedged herself as far as she could go into the space between shrub and hemisphere, holding the oxygen mask in her teeth.
With infinite care, though she was not likely to split the heavy bag, she pulled off her shoes and her heavy, woollen walking socks. She put the shoes back on. Her slacks covered her legs. Only her ankles were bare.
She unraveled one sock and stuffed the yarn40 in her ears. There was a sudden, remarkable41 quiet. Then, even through the yarn came the roar of the storm. For it was upon her.
She looked through the milky42 plastic into a wild, red inferno43, spitting at her in furious frustration44. Then she bound the other sock over her eyes.
She was in a blind, muffled45 world now, buffeted46 against the shrub and the wires and the steel rib, but not painfully, because of her heavy clothing. It was as though suddenly all her senses had been switched to the last pitch before silence.
"I might live," Annie thought. "I might."
There was sand in the bag now. Annie could feel it sifting47 under her collar and blowing up her ankles. Not much. It was coming from the bottom of the bag. Probably the end of the zipper had worked open just a little.
Was that the dull roar of the storm through her stoppered ears or the rushing of her own blood? If sand were seeping48 in, the storm must still be on.
How did Bradman breathe in his storm cellar? Would the storm last long enough for the air to go bad? It would go bad fast, in an enclosed place on Mars.
Bradman. What sort of monster would walk off and let another human being die? Without a glance backwards49? Did the cold desert wear the humanity out of a man? How did a human being get like that?
"'You've got a smile like a concrete slab.'" Is that what you say to a person when you know you're about to leave them to die?
UNMARRIED WOMEN BETWEEN THE AGES OF 21 AND 30. GOOD HEALTH. WELL ADJUSTED. MARRIAGE ON ARRIVAL. MARS TRANSPORT LEAVES OCT. 1.
Good health ... well adjusted ... she could see the printed words, red stereo words reaching out from the page. Unmarried women between ... they came and went in her mind and there was a roar in her ears. The words were gone now. Only a redness that came and went. No. A blackness.
Annie snatched the exhausted50 oxygen mask off her face and gulped51 a pallid, sandy breath of air. It wouldn't do. She took the sock off her eyes and bound it around her nose and mouth. It would filter some of the sand out. She opened her eyes briefly52 and closed them. The grit37 stayed in. She didn't dare open them again.
But the storm looked weaker. Or was it her imagination?
Hell with the zipper! She pulled her little mending kit17 out of her pocket and slashed54 the bag with the scissors.
The storm sounded louder now, with the bag gone. The sand blew under her eyelids56. Ripped her face. Tore a burning circle around each ankle.
Annie put her face in her hands, breathing through her nose and the sock.
She held herself stiffly. She didn't want to cough.
The whole world was a blind, gritty pain. There was no end to think of. Only pain.
A grayness.
A blackness.
Finally, a voice. Bradman.
Annie opened her eyes. They felt red and ruined. They were watering so much her cheeks were wet. She could hardly see.
She was having a coughing fit. She dragged herself upright. All she could see was sand. The plastic bubble had blown off the girders and if the furnishings and her suitcase were there, her eyes were still too dim to see them.
"Do you know what that shrub's worth on Mars?"
Annie found the yarn had fallen out of one ear and she pulled it out of the other.
"Do you know what that bag's worth?"
"I told them not to send a woman out here."
She pushed off and sank her fist into his teeth. He went down.
She was too light. But he was too light, too. It evened out.
She turned his face and held it in the sand. Her strength was insane.
"Do you know what a human life is worth?" she screamed.
He struggled, but she fought his bucking60 body, kept his face buried in the sand until he was dead and a long time after.
An age passed. Annie was frozen in a world rimed over with white starlight, sequinned with frost.
Then the crosseyed moons came up.
She found an edge of the plastic bubble, rumpled61 and limp and half buried in the sand. She pushed off the heaviest hills of sand with her hands and pulled it out. She climbed up the anchored girders with it, and then slept the rest of the night in her own home.
The next day she dug out her household supplies from the sand.
The day after she cleared the sand from the lichens on her farm.
On the fourth day she called a few neighbors in and late in the evening she buried Bradman.
No one questioned her. It had been, after all, self-defense.
She kept the farm as well as any man. Better. She worked. How she worked! She kept herself numb18 with labor62, her mind drunk with the liquors of fatigue63.
After five years, he came. He just appeared inside the door flap, looking a little nervous but grinning.
"I'm Jack64 Hamstrong," he said, his voice full and wholesome, like Iowa corn. "I—you weren't at the spaceport so I figured, what the heck. I just walked."
"This is my farm," Annie said. "My hands are on every inch of it."
Hamstrong's ruddy face turned in on itself a little. "I know. I know the story. I didn't come to take anything away. I came to—good Lord, didn't you know you'd be sent a husband?"
Annie's eyes went queer, like a cat's. "A husband?" If they'd told her, she hadn't heard. "Go away," she said. She looked around at her farm, the fruits of her travail—alone. The virgin65 birth.
"No," he said firmly. "It's yours and mine. Legally. I'm not a mean man, Annie. You'll find me patient. But stubborn. I can wait."
Annie sighed. Or was it a shudder66? She looked up again at the puckering67 edges of the evening sky.
She put down the knife she had been peeling a giant lichen with. She wiped her hands on her apron68 and lifted the door flap.
"All right, then," she said. "Wait."
"For what?"
"The sandstorm," she said.
And she got into the storm cellar and pulled down the weighty lid, locking it behind her.
The End
The End
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收听单词发音
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1
wholesome
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| adj.适合；卫生的；有益健康的；显示身心健康的 | |
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arid
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| adj.干旱的；(土地)贫瘠的 | |
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ramp
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| n.暴怒，斜坡，坡道；vi.作恐吓姿势，暴怒，加速；vt.加速 | |
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giggled
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| v.咯咯地笑( giggle的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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colonists
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| n.殖民地开拓者，移民，殖民地居民( colonist的名词复数 ) | |
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lichen
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| n.地衣, 青苔 | |
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temperate
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| adj.温和的，温带的，自我克制的，不过分的 | |
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lichens
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| n.地衣( lichen的名词复数 ) | |
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spike
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| n.长钉，钉鞋；v.以大钉钉牢，使...失效 | |
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embarrassment
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| n.尴尬；使人为难的人(事物)；障碍；窘迫 | |
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swell
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| vi.膨胀，肿胀；增长，增强 | |
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lurch
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| n.突然向前或旁边倒；v.蹒跚而行 | |
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phoenix
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| n.凤凰，长生(不死)鸟；引申为重生 | |
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14
shuffling
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| adj. 慢慢移动的, 滑移的 动词shuffle的现在分词形式 | |
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pointed
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| adj.尖的，直截了当的 | |
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transparent
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| adj.明显的，无疑的；透明的 | |
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kit
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| n.用具包，成套工具；随身携带物 | |
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numb
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| adj.麻木的，失去感觉的；v.使麻木 | |
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spat
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| n.口角，掌击；v.发出呼噜呼噜声 | |
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instinctively
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| adv.本能地 | |
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reassurance
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| n.使放心，使消除疑虑 | |
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grimaced
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| v.扮鬼相，做鬼脸( grimace的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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rim
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| n.(圆物的)边，轮缘；边界 | |
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agate
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| n.玛瑙 | |
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pallid
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| adj.苍白的，呆板的 | |
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slab
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| n.平板，厚的切片；v.切成厚板，以平板盖上 | |
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grotesque
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| adj.怪诞的，丑陋的；n.怪诞的图案，怪人（物） | |
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malignant
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| adj.恶性的，致命的；恶意的，恶毒的 | |
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sob
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| n.空间轨道的轰炸机；呜咽，哭泣 | |
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30
flaying
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| v.痛打( flay的现在分词 )；把…打得皮开肉绽；剥（通常指动物）的皮；严厉批评 | |
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31
oozing
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| v.（浓液等）慢慢地冒出，渗出( ooze的现在分词 )；使（液体）缓缓流出；（浓液）渗出，慢慢流出 | |
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32
insinuating
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| adj.曲意巴结的，暗示的v.暗示( insinuate的现在分词 )；巧妙或迂回地潜入；（使）缓慢进入；慢慢伸入 | |
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rattled
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| 慌乱的，恼火的 | |
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rib
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| n.肋骨，肋状物 | |
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shrub
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| n.灌木，灌木丛 | |
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hysterically
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| ad. 歇斯底里地 | |
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grit
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| n.沙粒，决心，勇气；v.下定决心，咬紧牙关 | |
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zipper
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| n.拉链；v.拉上拉链 | |
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pliant
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| adj.顺从的；可弯曲的 | |
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yarn
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| n.纱，纱线，纺线；奇闻漫谈，旅行轶事 | |
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remarkable
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| adj.显著的，异常的，非凡的，值得注意的 | |
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milky
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| adj.牛奶的，多奶的；乳白色的 | |
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inferno
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| n.火海；地狱般的场所 | |
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frustration
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| n.挫折，失败，失效，落空 | |
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45
muffled
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| adj.（声音）被隔的；听不太清的；（衣服）裹严的；蒙住的v.压抑，捂住( muffle的过去式和过去分词 )；用厚厚的衣帽包着（自己） | |
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46
buffeted
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| 反复敲打( buffet的过去式和过去分词 )； 连续猛击； 打来打去； 推来搡去 | |
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47
sifting
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| n.筛，过滤v.筛( sift的现在分词 )；筛滤；细查；详审 | |
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48
seeping
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| v.（液体）渗( seep的现在分词 )；渗透；渗出；漏出 | |
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49
backwards
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| adv.往回地，向原处，倒，相反，前后倒置地 | |
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50
exhausted
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| adj.极其疲惫的，精疲力尽的 | |
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51
gulped
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| v.狼吞虎咽地吃，吞咽( gulp的过去式和过去分词 )；大口地吸（气）；哽住 | |
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52
briefly
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| adv.简单地，简短地 | |
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53
foul
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| adj.污秽的；邪恶的；v.弄脏；妨害；犯规；n.犯规 | |
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54
slashed
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| v.挥砍( slash的过去式和过去分词 )；鞭打；割破；削减 | |
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55
slash
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| vi.大幅度削减；vt.猛砍，尖锐抨击，大幅减少；n.猛砍，斜线，长切口，衣衩 | |
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56
eyelids
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| n.眼睑( eyelid的名词复数 )；眼睛也不眨一下；不露声色；面不改色 | |
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57
gall
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| v.使烦恼，使焦躁，难堪；n.磨难 | |
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58
veins
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| n.纹理；矿脉( vein的名词复数 )；静脉；叶脉；纹理 | |
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59
braced
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| adj.拉牢的v.支住( brace的过去式和过去分词 )；撑牢；使自己站稳；振作起来 | |
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60
bucking
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| v.（马等）猛然弓背跃起( buck的现在分词 )；抵制；猛然震荡；马等尥起后蹄跳跃 | |
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61
rumpled
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| v.弄皱，使凌乱( rumple的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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labor
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| n.劳动，努力，工作，劳工；分娩；vi.劳动，努力，苦干；vt.详细分析；麻烦 | |
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fatigue
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| n.疲劳，劳累 | |
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jack
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| n.插座，千斤顶，男人；v.抬起，提醒，扛举；n.（Jake）杰克 | |
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virgin
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| n.处女，未婚女子；adj.未经使用的；未经开发的 | |
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shudder
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| v.战粟，震动，剧烈地摇晃；n.战粟，抖动 | |
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puckering
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| v.（使某物）起褶子或皱纹( pucker的现在分词 )；小褶纹；小褶皱 | |
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apron
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| n.围裙；工作裙 | |
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