An unpleasant communication to be made to Margaret! What could it be? The vain question whose solution was so near, and yet appeared to him so distant, in his impatience5 repeated itself perpetually in every waking hour, and he would frequently start from his sleep, roused by a terrible sense of undefined trouble impending6 over the woman who never ceased to occupy the chief place in his thoughts. The problem took every imaginable shape in his mind. The little knowledge he had of the circumstances of Margaret's life in Australia left him scope for all kinds of conjectures7, and did not impose superior probability on any. Was there a secret reason beyond, more pressing than her natural, easily explicable shrinking from the revival8 of pain and humiliation9, which kept Margaret so absolutely and resolutely10 silent concerning the years of her suffering and exile? Was there something which she knew and dreaded11, which might come to light at any time, which was soon to come to light now, in the background of her memory? Was there some transaction of Hungerford's, involving disgraceful consequences, which had been dragged into publicity13, in which she, too, must be involved, as well as the dead man's worthless memory? This might be the case; it might be debts, swindling, anything; and the brilliant and happy marriage she had made, might be destined14 to be clouded over by the shadow of her former life.
James Dugdale suffered very keenly during the few days in which he pondered upon these things. He tortured himself with apprehension15, and knew that, to a certain extent, it must be groundless. The only real, serious injury which could come out of the dark storehouse of the past, into the present life of Fitzwilliam Baldwin's wife, must be one of a nature to interfere16 with her relations towards her husband. She could afford to defy every other kind of harm. She was raised far above the influence of all material evil, and removed from the sphere in which the doings of people like Hungerford and his associates were ever heard of. Her marriage bucklered her no less against present than past evil; on all sides but one. When James weighed calmly the matter of which he never ceased to think, he called in "the succours of thought" to the discomfiture17 of "fear," which in its vague has greater torment18 than in its most defined shape, and drew upon their resources largely. Margaret had indeed been reticent19 with him, with her father, with Haldane, even, he felt persuaded, with her sister-in-law Lady Davyntry; but had she been equally reticent with Baldwin? He thought she had not; he hoped, he believed she had not; that the confidence existing between her and her husband was as perfect as their mutual20 love, and that, however strictly21 she might have maintained a silence, which Baldwin would have been the last man in the world to induce or wish her to break, up to the period of her marriage, he did not doubt that Margaret's husband was now in possession of all the facts of her past life, so that no painful intelligence could find him more or less unprepared than his wife to meet it.
It needed the frequent repetition of this belief to himself, the frequent repetition of the grounds on which it was founded, to enable James Dugdale to subdue22 the apprehensions23 inspired by Hayes Meredith's letter. His delicate health, his nervous susceptibility, the almost feminine sensitiveness of his temperament24, made suspense25, anxiety, and apprehension peculiarly trying to him; and the servants at Chayleigh, keener observers than their master, quickly found out that something was wrong with Mr. Dugdale, and that the arrival of the two gentlemen from foreign parts, for whose reception preparations were being duly made, would not be a cause of unalloyed pleasure to him.
The urgency of Meredith's request, that there might be no delay in a meeting between himself and Margaret, gave James much uneasiness, because, in addition to the general vagueness of the matter, he did not in this particular instance know what to do. Hayes Meredith did not wish her to be alarmed (which looked as if he believed her to be ignorant of the unpleasant intelligence to which he alluded26, as if he contemplated27 the necessity of its being broken to her with caution), but he laid stress on the necessity of an immediate28 meeting. How was this to be accomplished29? Meredith had not thought of such a contingency30 as that which actually existed. He had supposed it probable Mr. and Mrs. Baldwin would be in Scotland when his letter should reach James Dugdale, which must create a delay of a few days indeed, but he had not contemplated their absence at such a distance as must imply the postponement31 of a meeting for weeks.
James did not know what to do. To summon Margaret and Mr. Baldwin to return at once, without any clue to the meaning of the communication awaiting them, would be to alarm them to an extent, which, under any circumstances within the reach of his imagination, must be unnecessary; and from the possible responsibility involved in not procuring32 their return he naturally shrank. He could not communicate with Meredith, whose letter bore no address but "Liverpool;" there was nothing for it but the painful process of patience.
Mr. Carteret talked of Margaret more than usual in the interval between the arrival of Meredith's letter and the day on which he was expected at Chayleigh; the association of ideas made him garrulous33, and he expatiated34 largely to James upon the pleasure which Mr. Meredith would feel on seeing his protégée of the bad old times so differently circumstanced, and the splendid hospitality with which he would certainly be entertained at the Deane. Baldwin would return sooner than he had intended, no doubt, in consequence of Mr. Meredith's visit to England.
When Mr. Carteret expressed his opinion, apparently35 oblivious36 of the fact that the state of Margaret's health rendered her remaining abroad peculiarly desirable, James heard him with a sense of partial relief. It would be much gained, let the unpleasant business before them be what it might, if Mr. Carteret could be kept from alarm or pain in connection with it. If he could be brought to regard the sudden return of Margaret as a natural event, considering his placid37 nature and secluded38 habits, it might be readily practicable to secure him from all knowledge of what had occurred.
There was strong anticipative consolation39 for James Dugdale in this reflection. Reason with himself as he would, strive against it as he might, there was a presentiment40 of evil upon James's heart, a thrill of dread12 of the interruption of that happiness in which he found such pure and disinterested41 delight, and he dared not think of such a dread extending itself to the old man, who had built such an edifice42 of pride and contentment on his daughter's fortunes, and would have so little strength to bear, not alone its crumbling43, but any shock to its stability.
"Let it be what it may, I think it can be hidden from him," said James Dugdale, as he bade Mr. Carteret good-night for the last time before all his suspense should be resolved into certainty.
That particular aspect of nature, to which the complacent44 epithets45 "good old English" have been most frequently applied46 by poets and novelists, presented itself at Chayleigh, in perfection, on the day of Hayes Meredith's arrival. "Our English summer" has become rather mythical47 in this generation, and the most bearable kind of cold weather, keen, bright, frosty, kindly48 (to those who can afford ubiquitous fires and double windows), occurs in miserably49 small proportion to the dull, damp, despairing; winter of fogs and rain. It was not so between twenty and thirty years ago, however, and the eyes of the long-expatriated Englishman were refreshed, and those of his colonial-born son astonished, by the beauty and novelty of the scenery through which they passed on their journey southwards.
Chayleigh was one of those places which look particularly beautiful in winter. It boasted splendid evergreens50, and grassy51 slopes carefully kept, and the holly52 trees, freshly glistening53 after a fall of snow, which had just disappeared, were grouped about the low picturesque54 house like ideal trees in a fancy sketch55 of the proper home of Christmas. It was difficult to realise that the only dwellers56 in the pleasant house, from whose long low windows innumerable lights twinkled brightly, were two men, the one old in years, and older still in his quiet ways, in his deadness of sympathy with the outer world, the other declining also in years, and carrying, in a frail57 and suffering body, a heart quite purged58 of self, but heavy-laden with trouble for one far dearer than self had ever been to him.
Fair women and bright children should have tenanted such a home as that to which Mr. Carteret, a little later than the hour at which they were expected, bade Hayes Meredith and his son a hearty59 if somewhat old-fashioned welcome.
When the post-chaise which brought the travellers stopped, James Dugdale met his old friend as he stepped out, and the two looked at each other with the contending feelings of pain and pleasure which such a meeting was calculated to produce. Time had so altered each that the other would not have recognised him, had their meeting been a chance one; but when, a little later, they regarded each other more closely, many familiar looks and expressions, turns of feature and of phrase, made themselves observed in both, which restored the old feeling of familiarity.
Then James Dugdale saw the strong, frank, hopeful young man, with his vivacious60 black eyes, and his strong limbs, his cheery laugh, and his jovial61 self-reliant temper once more, and found all those qualities again in the world-taught, and the world-sobered, but not world-worn man whose gray hair was the only physical mark of time set upon him.
Then Hayes Meredith saw the pale, stooped student, with form awry62 and spiritual sensitive face, bearing upon it the inexplicable63 painful expression which malformation gives,--the keen intelligence, the sadly strong faculty64 of suffering--the equally keen affections and firm will. Time had set many a mark upon James. He had had rich brown curls, the only gift of youth dealt lavishly65 to him by nature, but they were gone now, and his hair was thin and gray, and the lines in his face were more numerous and deeper than might have been fitting at twenty additional years. But Hayes Meredith saw that same face under the lines, and in a wonderfully short time he found himself saying to himself--"I should feel as if we were boys together again, only that Dugdale, poor fellow, never was a boy."
"Is Mrs. Baldwin here?" was Meredith's first question to his friend, after the undemonstrative English greeting, which said so little and meant so much.
"No, she is abroad."
"How unfortunate!"
"What is the matter? Is anything very wrong?"
"No, no, we'll put it right--but we cannot talk of it now. When can I have some time with you quite alone?"
"To-night, if you are not too tired," returned James, who was intensely impatient to hear what had to be told, but to whose sensitive nerves the strong, steady, almost unconcerned manner of his friend conveyed some little assurance.
"To-night, then."
There was no farther private conversation between the two. Hayes Meredith devoted67 himself to Mr. Carteret, whose placid character afforded him considerable amusement, in its contrast with those of the bustling68 and energetic companions of his ordinary life. To Mr. Carteret, Hayes Meredith was an altogether new and delightful69 trouvaille. That he came from a new world, of infinite interest and importance to England; that he could tell of his own personal experience, particulars of the great events, political, commercial, and social, to which colonial enterprise had given rise; that, as a member of a strange community, with all the interest of a foreign land, and all the sympathy of fellowship of race attaching to them, Mr. Carteret knew, if he had cared to think about it, and he might perhaps, merely as an intellectual exercise, have comprehended, that there was something remarkable70 about his guest in that aspect. But he did not care about it in the least. The political, social, and commercial life of either this half of the world or the other half was a matter of entire indifference71 to him. He was eminently72 desirous to ascertain73, as soon as politeness warranted the inquiry74, whether Mr. Meredith had brought to England the "specimens76" which James Dugdale had bespoken77, and that point satisfactorily disposed of, and an early hour on the following day appointed for their disinterment from the general mass of luggage, he turned the conversation without delay on the cranial peculiarities79 of "black fellows," the number of species into which the marsupial80 genus may be divided, and the properties of the turpentine tree. On all these matters Hayes Meredith sustained a very creditable examination, and during its course rapidly arrived at a very kindly feeling towards his gentle and eccentric but eminently kind-hearted entertainer. There was a curious occult sympathy between the minds of James Dugdale and Hayes Meredith, as the latter thought:
"If it could be hidden from the poor old gentleman, and I really see no reason why he should ever know it, what a good thing it will be!"
Mr. Carteret had taken an early opportunity of expressing, not ungracefully, his sense of the kindness which his daughter had received at the hands of Mr. Meredith and his family, and his regret that she was not then at Chayleigh to welcome him. The embarrassment81 with which his guest received his courteous82 observations, and the little allusion83 which he afterwards made to Margaret, though it would have been natural that she should have been the prevailing84 subject of their conversation, did not strike Mr. Carteret in the least, though James Dugdale perceived it plainly and painfully, and it rendered the task which he had set himself--that of entertaining Robert Meredith--anything but easy. The mere2 notion of such a possibility as taking any notice of a boy, after having once shaken hands with him, and told him he was very happy to see him, and hoped he would make himself quite at home at Chayleigh, would never have occurred to Mr. Carteret. About boys, as boys, he knew very little indeed; but if the word aversion could ever be used with propriety85 in describing a sentiment entertained by Mr. Carteret, he might be said to regard them with aversion. They made noises, they opened doors unnecessarily often, and they never shut them; they trod on people's feet, and tore people's dresses; they did not wash their hands with decent frequency; and once a terrible specimen75 of the genus, having been admitted to a view of his precious case of Cape86 butterflies, thrust his plebeian87 and intrusive88 elbow through the glass. This was final.
"I don't like boys," said Mr. Carteret; "I don't understand them. Keep them away from me, please."
He had listened with a mild shudder89 to Haldane's praises of that "wonderfully clever child," the eldest90 Miss Crofton's "little brother;" and had turned a desperately91 deaf ear to all hints that an invitation for the urchin92 to inspect the wonders of the "collection" might be regarded by the Crofton family as an attention.
Haldane did not mention the talented creature again, and no boy had ever troubled Mr. Carteret from that hour until now. He had the satisfaction of knowing, when his prompt invitation was extended to James Dugdale's friends, that Robert Meredith was a big boy--not an objectionable child, with precocious94 ideas, prying95 eyes, and fingers addicted96 to mischief--had it been otherwise, his patience and hospitality would have been sorely tried.
"You will see to the young gentleman, Foster," he had said to his confidential97 servant; "I daresay he will like a good deal to eat and drink, and you can see that he does not wear strong boots in the house, and--ah--hem, Foster, you can make him understand--politely, you know--that people in general don't go into my rooms. You understand, Foster?"
"O yes, sir; I understand," said Foster, in a tone which to Mr. Carteret's sensitive ears implied an almost unfeeling indifference, but Foster acted on the hint for all that, and the result was remarkable.
Mr. Carteret never once had reason to complain of Robert Meredith. The boy never vexed98 or worried him; he seemed to have an intuitive comprehension of his feelings and prejudices, of his harmless little oddities, and in a silent, distant kind of way--for though a wonderful exception, Robert was still a boy, and therefore to be avoided--Mr. Carteret actually came to like him. In which particular he formed an exception to the entire household as then assembled at Chayleigh, and even when it received the accession of Mr. Baldwin, Margaret, and their little daughter. No one else in the house liked Robert Meredith.
The preoccupation of James Dugdale's mind, the anxiety and suspense of some days, which grew stronger and less endurable now when a few hours only divided him from learning, with absolute certainty, the evil tidings which Hayes Meredith had to communicate, rendered his friend's son and his affairs objects of very secondary interest to him. When he thought of the business which had induced Meredith to undertake such a voyage to England, such an absence from home, he roused himself to remember the keen interest he had taken in the father's projects for, and on account of, the son. But he could only remember it; he could not feel it again. When he should know the worst, when he and Meredith should have had their private talk that night, then things would resume their proper proportion, then he should be able to fulfil all his friend's behests, with the aid of his hand and his heart alike. But now, only the face of Margaret, pale, wan99, stern, with the youth and bloom gone from it, as he had seen her when she first came home; only the face of Margaret, transfigured in the light of love and joy, of pride and pleasure, as he had seen her last, held his attention. Her form seemed to flit before him in the air. The sound of her voice mingled100, to his fancy, with all other sounds. The effort to control his feelings, and bide101 his time, almost surpassed his strength. Afterwards, when he recalled that day, and tried to remember his impressions of Robert Meredith, James recollected102 him as a quiet, gentlemanly, self-possessed boy, with a handsome face, a good figure, and an intelligent expression--a little shy, perhaps, but James did not see that until afterwards. A boy without the objectionable habits of boys, but also without the frankness which beseems boyhood. A boy who watched Mr. Carteret's conversation with his father, and rapidly perceived that gentleman's harmless eccentricities103, and who, when he found that a total absence of observation was one of them, marked each fresh exhibition of them with a contemptuous sneer104, which would not have been out of place on the countenance105 of a full-grown demon66. He had a good deal of the early-reached decision in opinion and in manner which is a feature in most young colonials, but he was not unpleasantly "bumptious106;" and James Dugdale, had his mind been free to permit him to find pleasure in anything, would have enjoyed making the acquaintance of his old friend's son.
At length the two men found themselves alone in James Dugdale's room.
"Our consultation107 is likely to be a long one, Dugdale," said Meredith, as he seated himself close by the fire. "Is there any danger of our being interrupted or overheard?"
"None whatever," James answered. He felt unable to speak, to ask a question, now that the time had come.
Meredith looked at him compassionately108, but shrugged109 his shoulders at the same time, imperceptibly. He understood his friend's sensitiveness; his weakness he could not understand. "I may as well tell you at once," he said, "about this bad business." He took a paper from a pocket-book as he spoke78. "Tell me the exact date of Mr. Baldwin's marriage."
James named it without adding a word. Then Meredith handed him the paper he held, and James, having read it hastily, looked up at him with a pale horrified110 face.
点击收听单词发音
1 interval | |
n.间隔,间距;幕间休息,中场休息 | |
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2 mere | |
adj.纯粹的;仅仅,只不过 | |
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3 decided | |
adj.决定了的,坚决的;明显的,明确的 | |
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4 concealment | |
n.隐藏, 掩盖,隐瞒 | |
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5 impatience | |
n.不耐烦,急躁 | |
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6 impending | |
a.imminent, about to come or happen | |
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7 conjectures | |
推测,猜想( conjecture的名词复数 ) | |
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8 revival | |
n.复兴,复苏,(精力、活力等的)重振 | |
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9 humiliation | |
n.羞辱 | |
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10 resolutely | |
adj.坚决地,果断地 | |
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11 dreaded | |
adj.令人畏惧的;害怕的v.害怕,恐惧,担心( dread的过去式和过去分词) | |
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12 dread | |
vt.担忧,忧虑;惧怕,不敢;n.担忧,畏惧 | |
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13 publicity | |
n.众所周知,闻名;宣传,广告 | |
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14 destined | |
adj.命中注定的;(for)以…为目的地的 | |
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15 apprehension | |
n.理解,领悟;逮捕,拘捕;忧虑 | |
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16 interfere | |
v.(in)干涉,干预;(with)妨碍,打扰 | |
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17 discomfiture | |
n.崩溃;大败;挫败;困惑 | |
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18 torment | |
n.折磨;令人痛苦的东西(人);vt.折磨;纠缠 | |
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19 reticent | |
adj.沉默寡言的;言不如意的 | |
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20 mutual | |
adj.相互的,彼此的;共同的,共有的 | |
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21 strictly | |
adv.严厉地,严格地;严密地 | |
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22 subdue | |
vt.制服,使顺从,征服;抑制,克制 | |
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23 apprehensions | |
疑惧 | |
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24 temperament | |
n.气质,性格,性情 | |
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25 suspense | |
n.(对可能发生的事)紧张感,担心,挂虑 | |
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26 alluded | |
提及,暗指( allude的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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27 contemplated | |
adj. 预期的 动词contemplate的过去分词形式 | |
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28 immediate | |
adj.立即的;直接的,最接近的;紧靠的 | |
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29 accomplished | |
adj.有才艺的;有造诣的;达到了的 | |
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30 contingency | |
n.意外事件,可能性 | |
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31 postponement | |
n.推迟 | |
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32 procuring | |
v.(努力)取得, (设法)获得( procure的现在分词 );拉皮条 | |
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33 garrulous | |
adj.唠叨的,多话的 | |
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34 expatiated | |
v.详述,细说( expatiate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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35 apparently | |
adv.显然地;表面上,似乎 | |
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36 oblivious | |
adj.易忘的,遗忘的,忘却的,健忘的 | |
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37 placid | |
adj.安静的,平和的 | |
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38 secluded | |
adj.与世隔绝的;隐退的;偏僻的v.使隔开,使隐退( seclude的过去式和过去分词) | |
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39 consolation | |
n.安慰,慰问 | |
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40 presentiment | |
n.预感,预觉 | |
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41 disinterested | |
adj.不关心的,不感兴趣的 | |
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42 edifice | |
n.宏伟的建筑物(如宫殿,教室) | |
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43 crumbling | |
adj.摇摇欲坠的 | |
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44 complacent | |
adj.自满的;自鸣得意的 | |
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45 epithets | |
n.(表示性质、特征等的)词语( epithet的名词复数 ) | |
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46 applied | |
adj.应用的;v.应用,适用 | |
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47 mythical | |
adj.神话的;虚构的;想像的 | |
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48 kindly | |
adj.和蔼的,温和的,爽快的;adv.温和地,亲切地 | |
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49 miserably | |
adv.痛苦地;悲惨地;糟糕地;极度地 | |
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50 evergreens | |
n.常青树,常绿植物,万年青( evergreen的名词复数 ) | |
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51 grassy | |
adj.盖满草的;长满草的 | |
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52 holly | |
n.[植]冬青属灌木 | |
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53 glistening | |
adj.闪耀的,反光的v.湿物闪耀,闪亮( glisten的现在分词 ) | |
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54 picturesque | |
adj.美丽如画的,(语言)生动的,绘声绘色的 | |
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55 sketch | |
n.草图;梗概;素描;v.素描;概述 | |
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56 dwellers | |
n.居民,居住者( dweller的名词复数 ) | |
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57 frail | |
adj.身体虚弱的;易损坏的 | |
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58 purged | |
清除(政敌等)( purge的过去式和过去分词 ); 涤除(罪恶等); 净化(心灵、风气等); 消除(错事等)的不良影响 | |
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59 hearty | |
adj.热情友好的;衷心的;尽情的,纵情的 | |
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60 vivacious | |
adj.活泼的,快活的 | |
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61 jovial | |
adj.快乐的,好交际的 | |
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62 awry | |
adj.扭曲的,错的 | |
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63 inexplicable | |
adj.无法解释的,难理解的 | |
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64 faculty | |
n.才能;学院,系;(学院或系的)全体教学人员 | |
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65 lavishly | |
adv.慷慨地,大方地 | |
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66 demon | |
n.魔鬼,恶魔 | |
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67 devoted | |
adj.忠诚的,忠实的,热心的,献身于...的 | |
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68 bustling | |
adj.喧闹的 | |
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69 delightful | |
adj.令人高兴的,使人快乐的 | |
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70 remarkable | |
adj.显著的,异常的,非凡的,值得注意的 | |
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71 indifference | |
n.不感兴趣,不关心,冷淡,不在乎 | |
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72 eminently | |
adv.突出地;显著地;不寻常地 | |
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73 ascertain | |
vt.发现,确定,查明,弄清 | |
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74 inquiry | |
n.打听,询问,调查,查问 | |
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75 specimen | |
n.样本,标本 | |
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76 specimens | |
n.样品( specimen的名词复数 );范例;(化验的)抽样;某种类型的人 | |
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77 bespoken | |
v.预定( bespeak的过去分词 );订(货);证明;预先请求 | |
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78 spoke | |
n.(车轮的)辐条;轮辐;破坏某人的计划;阻挠某人的行动 v.讲,谈(speak的过去式);说;演说;从某种观点来说 | |
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79 peculiarities | |
n. 特质, 特性, 怪癖, 古怪 | |
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80 marsupial | |
adj.有袋的,袋状的 | |
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81 embarrassment | |
n.尴尬;使人为难的人(事物);障碍;窘迫 | |
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82 courteous | |
adj.彬彬有礼的,客气的 | |
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83 allusion | |
n.暗示,间接提示 | |
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84 prevailing | |
adj.盛行的;占优势的;主要的 | |
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85 propriety | |
n.正当行为;正当;适当 | |
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86 cape | |
n.海角,岬;披肩,短披风 | |
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87 plebeian | |
adj.粗俗的;平民的;n.平民;庶民 | |
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88 intrusive | |
adj.打搅的;侵扰的 | |
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89 shudder | |
v.战粟,震动,剧烈地摇晃;n.战粟,抖动 | |
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90 eldest | |
adj.最年长的,最年老的 | |
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91 desperately | |
adv.极度渴望地,绝望地,孤注一掷地 | |
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92 urchin | |
n.顽童;海胆 | |
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93 musingly | |
adv.沉思地,冥想地 | |
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94 precocious | |
adj.早熟的;较早显出的 | |
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95 prying | |
adj.爱打听的v.打听,刺探(他人的私事)( pry的现在分词 );撬开 | |
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96 addicted | |
adj.沉溺于....的,对...上瘾的 | |
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97 confidential | |
adj.秘(机)密的,表示信任的,担任机密工作的 | |
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98 vexed | |
adj.争论不休的;(指问题等)棘手的;争论不休的问题;烦恼的v.使烦恼( vex的过去式和过去分词 );使苦恼;使生气;详细讨论 | |
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99 wan | |
(wide area network)广域网 | |
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100 mingled | |
混合,混入( mingle的过去式和过去分词 ); 混进,与…交往[联系] | |
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101 bide | |
v.忍耐;等候;住 | |
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102 recollected | |
adj.冷静的;镇定的;被回忆起的;沉思默想的v.记起,想起( recollect的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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103 eccentricities | |
n.古怪行为( eccentricity的名词复数 );反常;怪癖 | |
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104 sneer | |
v.轻蔑;嘲笑;n.嘲笑,讥讽的言语 | |
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105 countenance | |
n.脸色,面容;面部表情;vt.支持,赞同 | |
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106 bumptious | |
adj.傲慢的 | |
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107 consultation | |
n.咨询;商量;商议;会议 | |
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108 compassionately | |
adv.表示怜悯地,有同情心地 | |
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109 shrugged | |
vt.耸肩(shrug的过去式与过去分词形式) | |
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110 horrified | |
a.(表现出)恐惧的 | |
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