To keep her feelings in this supreme4 hour of her fate as much to herself as possible was her great desire, and especially as regarded her father. His pride and delight in the good fortune which had befallen her were so great, his absolute oblivion of the past was so complete and so satisfactory, that she would not, if even it could have made things better rather than worse for her, have had the one feeling disturbed, or the other altered. He had never mentioned her first husband's name to her, and she would not, to spare herself any suffering, have had an occasion arise in which it must needs be mentioned. So, as they travelled towards her old home, there was nothing in the prospect5 of her meeting with her father to disturb her, and the events of the week she had just gone through, began to seem already distant.
After the day of the marriage, Baldwin had not spoken of the grief that had befallen them. If it had been possible for him to love her better, more tenderly, more entirely9, more deferentially10 than before, he would have done so; but it was not possible. In all conceivable respects their union was perfect; not even sorrow could draw them more closely together. Neither could sorrow part them, as sometimes it does part, almost imperceptibly, but yet surely, those whose mutual11 affection is not solidified12 by perfect similarity of temperament13.
The gravity of Margaret's character, which had been increased by the experiences of her life, by the deadly influences which had tarnished14 her youth, had been much tempered of late by the cordial cheerfulness, the unfailing sweetness of disposition15 which characterised Baldwin, and which, being entirely free from the least tinge16 of levity17, harmonised perfectly18 with her sensitiveness. So, in this grief, they felt alike, and while he comprehended, in its innermost depths and intricacy of feeling, the distress19 she suffered, he comprehended also that she needed no assurance of his appreciation20 and sympathy.
The details of business and the arrangements for the future which the terrible discovery had made necessary were imparted to her by Hayes Meredith, and never discussed between her and Baldwin. She understood that in the wildly improbable--indeed, as far as human ken8 could penetrate21, impossible--contingency that the truth should ever become known, the little Gertrude's future was to be made secure, by special precautions taken with that intent by her father. Thus no material anxiety oppressed her for the sake of the child, over whom, nevertheless, she grieved with a persistent22 intensity23 which would have seemed ominous24 and alarming to any one aware of it. But that no one knew; the infant was the sole and unconscious witness of the mother's suffering.
What intense shame and misery25, what incoherent passionate26 tenderness, what vague but haunting dread27, what foreshadowing of possible evil had possession of her soul, as, her head bent28 down over the little girl sleeping in her arms, Margaret approached her father's house!
Mr. Carteret was standing29 at the entrance, and behind him, in the shade of the portico30, was a figure whom Margaret did not recognise, and whom she was about to pass, having received her father's affectionate greeting, when Mr. Baldwin said, "This is Mr. Meredith's son, Margaret," and Robert held out his hand. Then she spoke7 to the boy, but hastily, being anxious to get her child and her father out of the cold air.
When the whole party had entered the house, and Mr. Baldwin and Mr. Carteret were talking by the fire in the study, Robert Meredith stood still in the hall watching the light snow flakes31 which had begun to fall sparingly, and which had the charm of novelty to him, and thinking not overpleasantly of Margaret.
"A proud, stuck-up fine lady," the boy muttered, and the expression of scorn which made his face so evil at times came over it. "I suppose she thinks I don't remember her in her shabby old clothes, and with her hands all rough. I suppose she fancies I was too much of a child to know all about her when she used to do our needlework, and my mother used to puzzle her head to make out jobs for her, because she was too proud to take the money as a present. I saw it all, though they didn't tell me; and I wonder how she would like me to tell her fine husband or her old fool of a father all about it! I remember how they talked about her at home when the black fellows killed Mr. Hungerford, and my father said they might venture to take her into the house now, until she could be sent to England. And my lady's too fine to look at one now, is she, with her precious self and her precious brat32 wrapped up in velvet33 and fur." And the boy pulled off a chair in the hall a mantle34 of Margaret's which had been thrown there, and kicked it into a corner.
It would be difficult to do justice to the vile35 expression of his handsome face, as, having given vent6 to this ebullition of senseless rage, he again stood, looking through the side windows of the hall door for the approach of the carriage which was to bring his father and James Dugdale to Chayleigh. The boy's chief characteristic was an extreme and besetting36 egotism, which Margaret had unconsciously offended. She would not have thought much or perhaps at all of the fact had she known it, but from the moment when, with a polite but careless greeting to Robert Meredith, she had passed on into the house, she had an enemy in the son of her old friend.
"I thought Margaret would be in a hurry home," said the unconscious Mr. Carteret, in a sagacious tone to his son-in-law, "when Meredith came. She received much kindness from him, and I knew she would like to acknowledge it as soon as possible."
"And I, too, sir," said Baldwin. "What a good fellow he is, and a fine hearty37 fellow! What do you think of the boy?"
"A very fair kind of boy indeed," said Mr. Carteret, with unusual alacrity38; "never requires to be told anything twice, and is never in the way. If he is noisy at all, he keeps it all for out of doors, I assure you. And not ignorant, by any means: gave me a very intelligible39 account of the habits of the wombat40 and the opossum. Really a very tolerable boy, Baldwin; I fancy you won't mind him much."
This was warm praise, and quite an enthusiastic supposition, for Mr. Carteret. Baldwin was much reassured41 by it; he and Margaret had been rather alarmed at the contemplation of his possible sufferings at finding himself alone with a real live boy. Baldwin was glad too of the excuse for talking about something apart from himself and Margaret. The most natural thing for him to say under the circumstances would have been, "Well, sir, and how do you think Margaret is looking?" but he hesitated about saying it, and was relieved when Mr. Carteret volunteered the opinion that she was looking very well, and began to question him about their doings in foreign parts.
Thus the time was whiled away until Meredith and Dugdale arrived, and Margaret, announcing that the child was asleep, came to sit with her father. A look from her husband showed her that all was well, and a look in return from her released him.
The evening passed away quietly. No incident of any moment occurred. Mr. Carteret displayed no curiosity about Meredith's business in London, though he was very congratulatory concerning the fortunate coincidence of the return of Mr. and Mrs. Baldwin, and very solicitous42 about the danger of James Dugdale's being made ill by the journey and the excitement of London, which presented itself to Mr. Carteret in most alarming colours. He had not been in "town" since Mrs. Carteret's death, and if, contrary to his usual placid43 habit, he speculated about his own future at all, it certainly was to the effect that he hoped he never should be there again.
The old gentleman was in a state of supreme mental content just now. He was very happy in all respects, and the return of Margaret and Mr. Baldwin completed his felicity. His daughter's account of her health was very satisfactory, and perhaps she need not go abroad again. They spoke of going on to the Deane if the weather should not prove very severe, and for his part he hoped they would do so. He had no great liking44 for foreign countries, and no strong faith in the remedial properties of their climate; and though he was very glad that Margaret had tried Italy and profited by it, he should be still more glad that she should decide on staying at home. With a splendid home, every conceivable comfort, and improved health, she need not gad45 about any more, especially under present circumstances.
On the whole, Mr. Carteret's state of mind was one of enviable contentment on the evening of his daughter's return, and as she and her husband commented on it when they were alone, they felt that his entire unconsciousness was most fortunate. They had nothing to fear from suspicion or inquisitiveness46 on his part--he was incapable47 of the one, except in the case of a traveller reporting on newly-discovered natural objects, or of the latter, except in the case of birds, beasts, and creeping things.
There was one dissatisfied person among the little party at Chayleigh on the night of the return. It was Robert Meredith. He had not succeeded in discovering the object of his father's visit to London. "I am going to London with Mr. Dugdale, for a few days, on particular business," his father had said to him before they went away. But he had not explained the nature of the business, and the boy was vexed48 by this reticence49. He had quick, subtle perceptions, and he had detected some trouble in his father's mind before they left home, and during the voyage. He had a secret conviction that this visit to London, whose object Meredith, an open-mannered, unreserved man with every one, and always frank and hearty in his dealings with his children, had not explained, had reference to this undiscovered source of trouble.
Robert listened to all the conversation which took place during the evening, and closely watched the countenances50 of every one present, but nothing transpired51 which shed the least light on the matter which excited his curiosity. He had not failed to remark that, though his father had told him all about his correspondence with Dugdale, and how he looked to him for advice and assistance in forwarding Robert's wishes, as to his education in England and his future career, the subject had not yet been discussed, and he had been left to amuse himself, and become familiar with the house and the surroundings, as best he might. A less shrewd and more amiable52 person than Robert Meredith would have imputed53 this to the pleasure of old friends in meeting after a separation of many years, and to the number and interest of the subjects they had to discuss. But Robert Meredith was not likely to entertain an hypothesis in which sentiment claimed a part, and was likely to resent anything which looked like a postponement54 of his claims to those of any subject or interest whatsoever55.
To baffle this youth's curiosity was to excite his anger and animosity--to make him determined56 that he would get to the bottom of the mystery sought to be concealed from him--to fill him with the belief that it must be evil in its nature, and its discovery profitable. It was to call out into active display all that was as yet worst in a nature whose capacity for evil Margaret had early detected, and concerning which his father had conceived many unspoken misgivings57.
"It is almost as if he had come to England about these people's affairs, and not about mine," said Robert Meredith to himself. "I wonder how many more days are to be lost before I hear what is to be done about me."
Margaret happened to glance towards him as this thought passed through his mind, and the expression of his face struck her painfully. "He was a bad child as I remember him.--a bad, sly, deceitful, heartless child--and he is a bad boy. He will be a bad man, I fear." She allowed these sentiments to influence her manner to Robert Meredith more than she was conscious of--it was polite indeed, but cold and distant.
It would have been depressing to a shy or sensitive person, but Robert Meredith was neither. He felt her manner indeed, and thought with a sneer58, that considering the friendship she professed59 for his father, she might at least have feigned60 some interest in him. But he did not care. This rich woman, of high station and social importance, which his colonial notions rather magnified, must befriend him in material concerns, and, therefore, how she felt towards him was a thing of no consequence whatever. She could not dislike him more than he disliked her, for he hated her and her fine husband. He remembered her poor, and almost at the mercy of his parents for daily bread, and now she was rich and independent of every one, and he hated her. How had she gained all the world had to give, all he had longed for, since in his childhood he had read and heard of the great world, and all its prizes and luxuries? Only by her beauty, only by a man's foolish love for her.
The boy's precocious61 mind dwelt upon this thought with peculiar62 bitterness and a kind of rage. He hated Baldwin, too, though with less of personal dislike than Margaret. He was the first man whom Robert Meredith had ever seen with whose wealth no idea of effort, of labour, of speculation63, of uncertainty64 was associated, and the boy's ambition and his avarice65 alike revolted against the contemplation of a position which he coveted66 with all the strength of his heart, and which he knew could never be his. This man, who passed him over as a mere1 boy--this man, who had given wealth and station to a woman whom Robert disliked and despised--was born to all these good things; he had not to long for them vainly, or to strive for them through long and weary toilsome years, with only the chance of winning them at last, which was to be his own lot in life. He might live as he listed, and the money he should have to spend would still be there.
Then there was a strife68 in the boy's mind between the burning desire for wealth, and the pleasures which wealth procures69, and distaste to, revolt against, the toil67 by which it must be earned. In the evil soil of his nature such plants were ripe of growth, and he rebelled blindly against the inevitable70 lot which awaited him. Only in the presence of Baldwin and Margaret, only in the innumerable trifling71 occurrences and allusions--all strange and striking; to the colonial-bred boy--which mark the presence and the daily habits of persons to whom wealth is familiar, had Robert Meredith been brought to understand the distinction between his own position in life and that of persons of assured fortune. As he learned the lesson, he also learned to hate the unconscious teachers.
He learned, by the discussion of plans which he heard in the course of the evening, that his father intended to visit Mr. Baldwin at the Deane, and that he was to be of the party. The prospect gave him no pleasure. He should see this fine lady, then, in her grand home. If he dared, how he should like to say a few things, in seeming innocent unconsciousness, which should remind her of the time when he had seen her in his father's house, and known far more about her than she or any one would have believed possible! The impulse to say something which should offend Mrs. Baldwin grew upon him; but he dared not yield to it, and his animosity increased towards the unconscious individual on whose account he was forced to impose restraint upon his spiteful and vicious nature.
Margaret retired72 early, and as she extended her hand to him with a kind "goodnight!" the diamonds which sparkled upon it caught his attention. Once more she marked the sinister73 look--half smile, half sneer--which came into his face. He was thinking, "I wonder whether you would like Mr. Baldwin to know about the trumpery74 ring my mother sold for you, and how you cried when you had to come to her afterwards, and tell her you had nothing left to sell."
On the following day the weather was bright, dry, and cheerful; Meredith, Baldwin, and Robert went out early, bent on a long walk. During the forenoon Margaret did not come downstairs, but in the afternoon she went to her father's study in search of James. She found him there, a large folio was on a reading-desk before him, but it was long since he had turned a page.
"Put this with the letters for post," she said, handing him a packet directed to Lady Davyntry, "and come out with me for a while."
James looked at her anxiously. She had a wearied, exhausted75 expression in her face, and her cheeks were deeply flushed.
"You are very tired, Margaret?"
"Yes, I am. I am easily tired now, and I have been writing for hours."
They went out together, and walked along the terrace into the flower-garden, which looked dreary76 in its desolate77 wintry condition. At first they talked vaguely78 of trifles, but after a while they fell into deep and earnest conversation, and Margaret leaned closely on James's arm as they walked, now quickly, now slowly, and sometimes she held him standing still, as she impressed upon him something that she was saying with emphasis.
The walk and the conference lasted long, and when at length the warning chill of sunset came, and James reminded Margaret of the danger of cold and fatigue79, and she yielded to his counsel, and turned towards the house, traces of deep emotion were visible upon the faces of both.
"I will not speak thus to you again," said Margaret, as they reached the portico; "but I have implicit80 faith in your remembrance of what I have said, and in your promise."
"You may trust both," James answered her in an earnest but broken voice; "I will remember, and I will send for Rose Moore."
"I am delighted you have made up your mind not to return to Italy," said Mr. Carteret a day or two later. "So much travelling would be very unfit for you, and your son and heir ought certainly to be born at the Deane."
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1
mere
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| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
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concealed
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| a.隐藏的，隐蔽的 | |
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inflict
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| vt.(on)把…强加给，使遭受，使承担 | |
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supreme
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| adj.极度的，最重要的；至高的，最高的 | |
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prospect
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| n.前景，前途；景色，视野 | |
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vent
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| n.通风口，排放口；开衩；vt.表达，发泄 | |
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spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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ken
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| n.视野，知识领域 | |
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entirely
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| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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deferentially
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| adv.表示敬意地，谦恭地 | |
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mutual
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| adj.相互的，彼此的；共同的，共有的 | |
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solidified
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| （使）成为固体，（使）变硬，（使）变得坚固( solidify的过去式和过去分词 )； 使团结一致； 充实，巩固； 具体化 | |
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temperament
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| n.气质，性格，性情 | |
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tarnished
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| （通常指金属）（使）失去光泽，（使）变灰暗( tarnish的过去式和过去分词 )； 玷污，败坏 | |
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disposition
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| n.性情，性格；意向，倾向；排列，部署 | |
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tinge
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| vt.(较淡)着色于，染色；使带有…气息；n.淡淡色彩，些微的气息 | |
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levity
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| n.轻率，轻浮，不稳定，多变 | |
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perfectly
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| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
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distress
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| n.苦恼，痛苦，不舒适；不幸；vt.使悲痛 | |
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appreciation
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| n.评价；欣赏；感谢；领会，理解；价格上涨 | |
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penetrate
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| v.透(渗)入；刺入，刺穿；洞察，了解 | |
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persistent
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| adj.坚持不懈的，执意的；持续的 | |
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intensity
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| n.强烈，剧烈；强度；烈度 | |
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ominous
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| adj.不祥的，不吉的，预兆的，预示的 | |
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misery
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| n.痛苦，苦恼，苦难；悲惨的境遇，贫苦 | |
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passionate
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| adj.热情的，热烈的，激昂的，易动情的，易怒的，性情暴躁的 | |
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dread
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| vt.担忧，忧虑；惧怕，不敢；n.担忧，畏惧 | |
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bent
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| n.爱好，癖好；adj.弯的；决心的，一心的 | |
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standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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portico
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| n.柱廊，门廊 | |
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flakes
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| 小薄片( flake的名词复数 )； （尤指）碎片； 雪花； 古怪的人 | |
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brat
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| n.孩子；顽童 | |
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velvet
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| n.丝绒，天鹅绒；adj.丝绒制的，柔软的 | |
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mantle
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| n.斗篷，覆罩之物，罩子；v.罩住，覆盖，脸红 | |
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vile
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| adj.卑鄙的，可耻的，邪恶的；坏透的 | |
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besetting
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| adj.不断攻击的v.困扰( beset的现在分词 )；不断围攻；镶；嵌 | |
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hearty
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| adj.热情友好的；衷心的；尽情的，纵情的 | |
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alacrity
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| n.敏捷，轻快，乐意 | |
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intelligible
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| adj.可理解的，明白易懂的，清楚的 | |
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wombat
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| n.袋熊 | |
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reassured
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| adj.使消除疑虑的；使放心的v.再保证，恢复信心( reassure的过去式和过去分词) | |
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solicitous
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| adj.热切的，挂念的 | |
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placid
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| adj.安静的，平和的 | |
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liking
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| n.爱好；嗜好；喜欢 | |
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gad
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| n.闲逛；v.闲逛 | |
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inquisitiveness
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| 好奇，求知欲 | |
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incapable
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| adj.无能力的，不能做某事的 | |
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vexed
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| adj.争论不休的；（指问题等）棘手的；争论不休的问题；烦恼的v.使烦恼( vex的过去式和过去分词 )；使苦恼；使生气；详细讨论 | |
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reticence
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| n.沉默，含蓄 | |
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countenances
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| n.面容( countenance的名词复数 )；表情；镇静；道义支持 | |
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transpired
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| （事实，秘密等）被人知道( transpire的过去式和过去分词 )； 泄露； 显露； 发生 | |
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amiable
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| adj.和蔼可亲的，友善的，亲切的 | |
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53
imputed
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| v.把（错误等）归咎于( impute的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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postponement
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| n.推迟 | |
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whatsoever
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| adv.（用于否定句中以加强语气）任何；pron.无论什么 | |
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determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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misgivings
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| n.疑虑，担忧，害怕；疑虑，担心，恐惧( misgiving的名词复数 )；疑惧 | |
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sneer
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| v.轻蔑；嘲笑；n.嘲笑，讥讽的言语 | |
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professed
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| 公开声称的，伪称的，已立誓信教的 | |
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feigned
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| a.假装的，不真诚的 | |
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precocious
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| adj.早熟的；较早显出的 | |
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peculiar
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| adj.古怪的，异常的；特殊的，特有的 | |
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63
speculation
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| n.思索，沉思；猜测；投机 | |
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64
uncertainty
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| n.易变，靠不住，不确知，不确定的事物 | |
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65
avarice
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| n.贪婪；贪心 | |
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66
coveted
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| adj.令人垂涎的；垂涎的，梦寐以求的v.贪求，觊觎(covet的过去分词)；垂涎；贪图 | |
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67
toil
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| vi.辛劳工作，艰难地行动；n.苦工，难事 | |
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68
strife
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| n.争吵，冲突，倾轧，竞争 | |
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69
procures
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| v.（努力）取得， （设法）获得( procure的第三人称单数 )；拉皮条 | |
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70
inevitable
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| adj.不可避免的，必然发生的 | |
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71
trifling
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| adj.微不足道的；没什么价值的 | |
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72
retired
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| adj.隐退的，退休的，退役的 | |
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sinister
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| adj.不吉利的，凶恶的，左边的 | |
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74
trumpery
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| n.无价值的杂物；adj.（物品）中看不中用的 | |
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75
exhausted
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| adj.极其疲惫的，精疲力尽的 | |
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76
dreary
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| adj.令人沮丧的，沉闷的，单调乏味的 | |
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desolate
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| adj.荒凉的，荒芜的；孤独的，凄凉的；v.使荒芜，使孤寂 | |
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78
vaguely
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| adv.含糊地，暖昧地 | |
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79
fatigue
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| n.疲劳，劳累 | |
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implicit
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| a.暗示的，含蓄的，不明晰的，绝对的 | |
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