Out on the porch he found his wife, rocking there all by herself and looking a little vacantly off at the shrubs9 and trees.
"Ah, Anna," he said; then perched himself in a nonchalant, really an almost rakish manner, on the[Pg 200] railing, throwing one leg over the other, and folding his arms. He yawned a little audibly, concluding that function with a kind of masterful, contented10 smacking11 of the lips—even whistled a few bars of a gay secular12 tune13.
"Did you sleep well, Alf?" Anna Needham spoke14 calmly, rocked calmly. She still eyed the shrubs and trees in a spirit of almost hypnotized calm.
"I had a magnificent nap," he assured her.
Anna rocked more slowly. "Alf," she hesitated.
"Yes, Anna?"
"Alf, I wonder if I can be getting old ...?"
"Old, Anna?" He was really quite shocked at the suggestion.
"Yes—I don't know. Sometimes...."
"Nonsense!"
"I don't know ..." she continued dreamily.
"But why should you ever think such a thing?"
"Well, lately there've been times when I've felt so kind of still. I don't know, but I thought—I thought it might be...."
"Why, Anna ...!" he cried in vaguely15 frightened tones.
"I don't know, Alf." Her manner retained its essential dreaminess. "Sometimes when I sit alone rocking, I feel so kind of still...."
The minister laughed, then, with even an attempt at something like boisterousness16; but it was plain something of his earlier flamboyancy17 had vanished.[Pg 201] Abruptly18, right in the heyday19 of his most glorious mood, the shortness of life struck him with uncanny force. Life's shortness, and, though he indignantly repudiated20 the insinuation, its relative futility21, after all. Where had one come from in the beginning; just what was it one was up to now; and where was it one would go when the breath of life ceased flowing? Oh, what a piece of work is man! These were the secret inner workings. With a thrill of genuine horror the minister found himself asking what he knew, as a fact, after all these years of preaching it, about the immortality22 of the soul. It was terrible, terrible! Oh, that he should be afflicted23 with such doubts! And not ten minutes ago the Rev. Needham had squared his shoulders and flashed so grand a defiance24 at his own reflection....
Curiously25 enough, this sudden unpleasant sense of renewed insecurity was augmented26, at the moment when it was most acute, by the rippling27 laughter of his approaching sister-in-law. Miss Whitcom and her friend were returning from their tête-à-tête in the bower28. The laugh, whatever it might mean to the minister, signified that the lady was not, so easily, to be carried off her feet, and that, however thrillingly she might talk about not being a pioneer any longer, no mere29 travelling man was to capture her without at least a concluding scramble30.
Barrett O'Donnell knew quite well what the laugh signified. But it didn't, for all that, very greatly disturb him. Lord, he'd waited twenty years: he[Pg 202] could wait twenty more, if necessary. There is not that hot impetuosity in the affection of souls matured which characterizes youth; not that fever, that restless, exquisite31 rush of heady devotion. Still, there is perhaps something in being quite sure your love isn't misplaced. Yes, in a way, to be sure may be even better than to possess.
The return of Miss Whitcom and Mr. O'Donnell from one direction fell simultaneously32 with the return of Louise and Lynndal Barry from another. The porch became a very lively place, all at once, where a few moments before it had been so quiet, with only the minister's wife there, rocking.... Louise was greatly relieved that it should be so. To have returned to a silent and deserted33 house after what had passed between herself and Lynndal on the beach must have proved next to unbearable34. As it was, the frantic35 difficulty of the situation would be lightened, if only temporarily.
Marjory pounced36 at once upon the westerner, turning from her ancient suitor with a careless alacrity37 which seemed saying: "After all, I am free, quite superbly free!" And O'Donnell muttered an "Ah!" scarce audibly; and what he meant by it was this: "I know you'll come back to me. You always have and you always will. We are not quite free, either of us, in one sense of the word." One glorious, indomitable sense of the word.
Marjory wanted to know more about the dam in Arizona, and especially she wanted to get at the[Pg 203] other side of this tragic38 love affair—this bit of high tragedy in humble39 setting. In art, she thought, tragedy has a way of being generally treated nobly and loftily; but in life, somehow, it often seems almost absurd. Yes, first it was the dam. But she did not really care two straws about the dam. She had got beyond all such things as dams in her pilgrimage.
The Rev. Needham opened up a conversation about the Point with O'Donnell. But he kept eyeing his daughter, who leaned against the railing of the porch, her hands clasped before her. Alfred, despite his calling, was a wretched reader of souls. The look in one's eyes or the line of one's lips meant next to nothing, definitely—if only because these things might mean so bafflingly much.... If you actually shed tears, then he would be reasonably sure you must be unhappy. Hearty40 laughter signified, of course, a state of hilarity41. However, the Rev. Needham's spirit, with Milton's, took, really, no middle course. There lay an almost blank chasm42 between tears and laughter—although, alas43, the fact of its being a chasm did not make it any less conducive44 to prickles in one's suspended heels.
"There's only one thing," O'Donnell was observing, "—only one thing I've got against this place."
"What's that?" asked the minister.
"There are so many signs!"
It took the Rev. Needham just a moment to comprehend what was meant. "You mean the Assembly notices?"
[Pg 204]
"I suppose that's what they are. If you'll pardon my saying so, it seems sometimes as though there's a sign on every tree. One says you mustn't peel the birch bark, and the next one announces a lecture on such and such a day."
"I'm afraid they have multiplied the last few seasons," admitted the minister. "We don't seem to notice—so used to them, I suppose. There are picnickers, you know—come from other parts—and we have to look out for the natural beauty or it will be all spoiled. As for the lecture announcements," he concluded, "the—the church, you know, has to keep pace, nowadays. Yes, it—it has to advertise a little!" He spoke almost glibly45, and sighed; but quite brightly, indeed almost chirpily.
Miss Whitcom caught the confession46. And she hopped47 down at once off Mr. Barry's fine Arizona dam—which diverted water into a huge reservoir, thus keeping off the Needham wolf—and administered what might vulgarly be termed a knock-out.
"I should say it does have to advertise! Oh, yes, the church must indeed hustle48 to keep pace! Even so, I hear the attendance is dropping off."
"Marjory?" began her brother-in-law with unhappy and interrogative vehemence49. The low bow, alas, would do no good at all here. This woman was unspeakable. She struck him as almost a monster! Not that this was manifest, of course; it was merely the way she struck his invisible soul.
"Oh, gracious, Alfred, I don't mean your [Pg 205]attendance. I'm not referring to your particular church. I speak as a sociologist—a biologist!" She laughed. "Yes, I always try to consider these things in the broadest sense. And I don't see why you should look so shocked, for after all I'm only agreeing with you. Don't you see I am? The church does have to advertise. Has to stir up public controversies50 for the sake of getting itself discussed—always biologically speaking, Alfred. It has to get itself recognized as a social force. That's the word: a social force! It must be a little sensational51 even, sometimes, to match the growing sensationalism of life. What more natural? An atmosphere of spry colloquialism52. Yes, the modern church must compete. Why not introduce the movies into Sunday School—?"
"We haven't yet done any of these things, Marjory," declared the Rev. Needham earnestly, a trifle coolly. He seemed really to insist upon receiving all her shafts53 personally.
"Some churches do though," volunteered O'Donnell—and laughed a little nervously54.
Mrs. Needham had been following the conversation, glancing first at one speaker then at another; now she spoke: "Marjory, how do you ever manage to keep track of everything that's going on here in America?" It was not the first time since her arrival amongst them that Anna's sister had amazed her with a grasp of home affairs—often with flashes of vision which had been closed to her before.
"Oh," replied Marjory with pleasant lightness, "but[Pg 206] you see such demonstrations55 as these exude56 an influence—it's a little like the wireless57. One feels their thrill all around the earth."
"Besides," interposed O'Donnell quite seriously, "you know Tahulamaji's awfully58 advanced."
"Is it?" asked Mrs. Needham guilelessly, turning towards him.
"Oh, tremendously," he assured her. "As I make it out Queen Tess was one of the most advanced women of her time. I tell you, things move in Tahulamaji!"
Mrs. Needham had not hitherto felt, as she indefinitely put it to herself, very well acquainted with this travelling man friend of her sister's. Suddenly she found herself holding the centre of the stage with him. It amounted to a little thrill.
"I suppose, after all, things aren't so different there—conditions, should I say?"
"Well," hedged O'Donnell, beginning to perceive that he had entered somewhat dangerous waters. He glanced at Miss Whitcom, who merely shrugged59 her shoulders, which seemed equivalent to an assurance that, having involved himself unnecessarily in her behalf, he might just flounder along, so far as she was concerned, until kingdom come.
"Maybe," suggested the minister's wife with a dart60 of genuine brilliance61, "the churches do all those things in Tahulamaji!" Would it not seem to explain Marjory's being so uncannily well informed?
The Rev. Needham inwardly fidgeted. He felt he[Pg 207] ought to be in the forefront of the discussion, defending his cloth. But suddenly he seemed, within, sadly and impotently, to have nothing to say. There were times when he felt he didn't possess a single honest prejudice any more, or hold one single irrefragable opinion. What a fortunate thing for the soul is its kind bulwark62 of flesh!
Anna's suggestion at length stirred Miss Whitcom, however. "Oh, no," she said quietly, "they don't."
"Still," O'Donnell objected, "you told me the Queen was incorrigibly63 modern, and you said she adored the movies."
"Oh, we're modern," replied Marjory with an ungodly smirk64. "Yes, we're modern enough in Tahulamaji. I may say we're quite in the van of civilization. We're so modern that we haven't any churches. So how could we advertise?"
"No churches, Marjory?" queried65 her brother-in-law. "But you seem to forget—"
"Well, at least nothing you'd call a church, I'm sure, Alfred—outside of what the foreigners have imported, that is. A few little rude native altars.... That's all. You know, 'when two or three are gathered together'.... It's—well, I've sometimes felt it's the spirit that counts in Tahulamaji, when it comes to matters of religion. Everything's very, very simple. We really haven't time to do it the grand way, even if we knew how."
They hadn't time for church in Tahulamaji! The awful question which now wracked the soul of the[Pg 208] minister was: If they hadn't time for church, what had they time for? A dimly terrifying curiosity assailed66 him. The Rev. Needham had read vague things about the people of the tropics. And a flush overspread his lined, worried face.
Yes, Marjory was an odd sheep, if not a black one. Perhaps she could hardly be called a black one, though there were certainly times when the Rev. Needham saw her as through smoked glasses. Anyway, an odd sheep she certainly was. She did not seem to belong in the herd67 at all—let alone the family! The rest were all quiet, sensible, orthodox. But about everything Marjory said or did there was something unorthodox, something wickedly theatrical68. What a past she had had! Just think of it! Just think, for instance, of spending five whole years of one's life in a place like Tahulamaji! Well, the ways of God were unsearchable. So, it seemed, were the ways of His satanic opponent. The reason she seemed different from themselves must be, fundamentally, that she had had a past. But why had she had a past? Yes, the minister's speculations69 always must terminate with the knottiest70 question raised and unanswered. It seemed a part of his destiny.
And meanwhile, there stood Louise and Lynndal, not six feet apart, yet never meeting each other's look; never speaking. How unpremeditated and tragic! He had come all the way from Arizona, and now they had nothing to say to each other. Louise, leaning wretchedly against the railing, seemed, just[Pg 209] now, able to realize nothing clearly. The episode on the beach had confused her. She felt herself baffled.
As for Barry's state of mind, that, also, was considerably71 cloudy. It had happened—the inconceivable, the impossible—and it was now over. Yet was it really over? In just a swift moment like this had all his dreams been broken? It seemed incredible: he could not believe it. He tried to reassure72 himself, endeavoured to keep hope alight. Something wise and still, deep in his heart, counseled patience. It might be she was only confused: it seemed strange to her, having suddenly a reality like this in place of her dreams. Louise was a dreamer—he knew that. And what might be going on inside her wayward little head, who could guess? So far Barry had only distinguished73 himself as a wizard of the burning sands. He was a man who could make deserts bloom like the rose. Yet who could say but perhaps he knew a little, too, about the subtler bloom of a woman's heart? Patience, he argued within himself. It might be she was only puzzled, and that she still loved him in spite of the thing that had happened. He would be patient a little while. If it turned out at last that there was no hope, why, then he would go back to the desert again. That was all.
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rev
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| v.发动机旋转，加快速度 | |
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siesta
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| n.午睡 | |
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benign
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| adj.善良的，慈祥的；良性的，无危险的 | |
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peculiar
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| adj.古怪的，异常的；特殊的，特有的 | |
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poignant
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| adj.令人痛苦的，辛酸的，惨痛的 | |
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psychology
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| n.心理，心理学，心理状态 | |
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miraculously
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| ad.奇迹般地 | |
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resolute
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| adj.坚决的，果敢的 | |
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shrubs
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| 灌木( shrub的名词复数 ) | |
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contented
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| adj.满意的，安心的，知足的 | |
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smacking
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| 活泼的，发出响声的，精力充沛的 | |
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secular
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| n.牧师，凡人；adj.世俗的，现世的，不朽的 | |
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tune
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| n.调子；和谐，协调；v.调音，调节，调整 | |
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spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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vaguely
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| adv.含糊地，暖昧地 | |
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boisterousness
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| n.喧闹；欢跃；（风暴）狂烈 | |
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flamboyancy
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| n.火焰状，浮华 | |
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abruptly
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| adv.突然地，出其不意地 | |
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heyday
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| n.全盛时期，青春期 | |
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repudiated
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| v.（正式地）否认( repudiate的过去式和过去分词 )；拒绝接受；拒绝与…往来；拒不履行（法律义务） | |
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futility
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| n.无用 | |
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immortality
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| n.不死，不朽 | |
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afflicted
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| 使受痛苦，折磨( afflict的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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defiance
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| n.挑战，挑衅，蔑视，违抗 | |
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curiously
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| adv.有求知欲地；好问地；奇特地 | |
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Augmented
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| adj.增音的 动词augment的过去式和过去分词形式 | |
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rippling
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| 起涟漪的，潺潺流水般声音的 | |
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bower
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| n.凉亭，树荫下凉快之处；闺房；v.荫蔽 | |
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mere
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| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
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scramble
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| v.爬行，攀爬，杂乱蔓延，碎片，片段，废料 | |
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exquisite
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| adj.精美的；敏锐的；剧烈的，感觉强烈的 | |
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simultaneously
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| adv.同时发生地，同时进行地 | |
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deserted
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| adj.荒芜的，荒废的，无人的，被遗弃的 | |
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unbearable
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| adj.不能容忍的；忍受不住的 | |
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frantic
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| adj.狂乱的，错乱的，激昂的 | |
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pounced
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| v.突然袭击( pounce的过去式和过去分词 )；猛扑；一眼看出；抓住机会（进行抨击） | |
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alacrity
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| n.敏捷，轻快，乐意 | |
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tragic
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| adj.悲剧的，悲剧性的，悲惨的 | |
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humble
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| adj.谦卑的，恭顺的；地位低下的；v.降低，贬低 | |
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hearty
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| adj.热情友好的；衷心的；尽情的，纵情的 | |
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hilarity
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| n.欢乐；热闹 | |
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chasm
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| n.深坑，断层，裂口，大分岐，利害冲突 | |
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alas
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| int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等) | |
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conducive
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| adj.有益的，有助的 | |
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glibly
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| adv.流利地，流畅地；满口 | |
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confession
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| n.自白，供认，承认 | |
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hopped
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| 跳上[下]( hop的过去式和过去分词 )； 单足蹦跳； 齐足（或双足）跳行； 摘葎草花 | |
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hustle
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| v.推搡；竭力兜售或获取；催促；n.奔忙(碌) | |
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vehemence
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| n.热切；激烈；愤怒 | |
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controversies
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| 争论 | |
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sensational
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| adj.使人感动的，非常好的，轰动的，耸人听闻的 | |
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colloquialism
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| n.俗话，白话，口语 | |
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53
shafts
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| n.轴( shaft的名词复数 )；（箭、高尔夫球棒等的）杆；通风井；一阵（疼痛、害怕等） | |
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nervously
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| adv.神情激动地，不安地 | |
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demonstrations
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| 证明( demonstration的名词复数 )； 表明； 表达； 游行示威 | |
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exude
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| v.(使)流出，(使)渗出 | |
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wireless
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| adj.无线的；n.无线电 | |
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awfully
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| adv.可怕地，非常地，极端地 | |
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shrugged
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| vt.耸肩（shrug的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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dart
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| v.猛冲，投掷；n.飞镖，猛冲 | |
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brilliance
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| n.光辉，辉煌，壮丽，（卓越的）才华，才智 | |
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bulwark
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| n.堡垒，保障，防御 | |
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incorrigibly
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| adv.无法矫正地；屡教不改地；无可救药地；不能矫正地 | |
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smirk
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| n.得意地笑；v.傻笑；假笑着说 | |
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queried
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| v.质疑，对…表示疑问( query的过去式和过去分词 )；询问 | |
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assailed
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| v.攻击( assail的过去式和过去分词 )；困扰；质问；毅然应对 | |
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herd
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| n.兽群，牧群；vt.使集中，把…赶在一起 | |
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theatrical
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| adj.剧场的，演戏的；做戏似的，做作的 | |
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speculations
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| n.投机买卖( speculation的名词复数 )；思考；投机活动；推断 | |
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knottiest
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| adj.（指木材）多结节的( knotty的最高级 )；多节瘤的；困难的；棘手的 | |
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considerably
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| adv.极大地；相当大地；在很大程度上 | |
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72
reassure
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| v.使放心，使消除疑虑 | |
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distinguished
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| adj.卓越的，杰出的，著名的 | |
参考例句： |
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