Antonia meanwhile worked at her dragons with a will. If Susy were out of her element, Antonia was absolutely steeped in hers. The faded furniture, the subdued light, the rich colour of the magnificent china filled her really artistic5 nature with a sense of rejoicing. Behind all her affectations, Antonia had a soul. It had never been awakened6 yet. All her life hitherto [Pg 208]poor Antonia had spent her time with the most empty-headed and frivolous7 people. Only art seemed great and glorious and satisfying. She loved it sincerely, and for itself alone; she had no ambitions with regard to it, ambition was not a part of her queer nature; she would all her life be a humble8 votary9 at a lofty shrine10. She did not imagine that there could be anything greater than art in the whole world. As yet her soul had not been really aroused, but the time of awakening11 was near.
Having made a rough, and, in truth, a very distorted sketch12 of the dragons, she gathered up her colours and portfolio13, and prepared to search farther afield for objects on which to expend14 her genius. She followed Susy into the octagon hall, but, seeing the wide front doors open, went out, and, crossing a by no means well-kept field, entered the paddock, where the colts, Joe and Robin15, had disported16 themselves before their sale. The paddock was skirted by a copse of small fir-trees, and Antonia sniffed17 the air as she walked towards it. Antonia was in a rusty18 black dress, with very little material in the skirt, and an extremely long train, which she never held up. She had just got to the edge of the copse of young trees, and was preparing to make a sketch of their straight trunks with the delicate sunlight shining across them, when a strange noise attracted her attention. She dropped her colour box, uttered one of her affected19 little shrieks20, and then dropped on her knees beside a child who was lying face downwards21 on the grass. The child's dark hair completely covered her face, but the sobs22 which shook her slender little frame were too violent to be inaudible. Whatever ailed24 the child, she was prostrated25 by such a tempest of grief that Antonia forgot high art in an honest wish to comfort human misery26.
i_3
ANTONIA AND NELL IN THE PADDOCK (p. 209).
[Pg 209]
"Who are you?" she asked. "Can I do anything for you? What can be the matter with you? Have you lost your colour box?"
Nell turned a little when she was spoken to; dabbed29 her pocket-handkerchief into each eye, and then looked up at Antonia.
"I wish you'd go away," she said. "I don't want you. I have come away here to hide. I wish, I wish you'd go away!"
"I don't wish to trouble you in any way," replied Antonia, "but I can't go away, for I've come here to sketch. Your sobs don't disturb me now that I know there's nothing very serious the matter, so perhaps my presence won't disturb you. I'll sit here and not take the least notice of you. I must imprison30 that sunshine before it goes. You can sob23 away, I won't listen."
But to be told that you can sob as long as you like has generally the effect of stopping tears, and Nell, astonished at Antonia's appearance and words, presently sat up on the grass, and, flinging back her heavy mane of hair, watched the priestess of art with great interest. How could Antonia imprison a sunbeam? It sounded interesting! Nell blinked her eyes and looked at her solemnly.
"Well, child," said Antonia, pausing in her work, and giving her one of her slow glances, "I'm glad you're better; I never heard such distressing31 sobs. It's a great pity for you to cry so much, for you disfigure yourself; but I wish now that you are here [Pg 210]you'd sit still, for I'd like to sketch you with that woebegone look. I never saw such a perfect ideal of true artistic beauty before."
"Beauty?" said Nell, with a little laugh. "But I'm called 'the ugly duckling'!"
"Charming!" exclaimed Antonia. "I'll immortalise this 'ugly duckling.' She shall be the foreground for these pine trees, and the imprisoned32 sunbeams can light her up from behind."
Notwithstanding her sorrow, Nell found it intensely interesting to be made the foreground of a picture. She wondered how the imprisoned sunbeams would like their office of always shining round her head. Nell was by no means vain. She honestly believed herself to be a hideous33 little girl, but it was refreshing34 once, as a change, to be spoken of as a true artistic beauty. She thought that she would learn the phrase, and repeat it over when she looked at herself in the glass, or when Kitty and Harry35 became more than usually aggravating36 about her personal appearance.
Meanwhile, the artist dashed in her colours with fiery37 speed. Nell sat perfectly38 still, and gazed straight at Antonia. Suddenly a flood of colour spread itself all over her face. Was Antonia the new owner of the Towers? If so, she was the cause of poor Nell's heart-broken sobs.
The younger members of the Lorrimer household had solemnly vowed40 an undying feud41 against the new owner of the Towers. They had established this feud with the solemnity of a sacred rite42. They had made a bonfire and stood round it in a circle and joined hands, and declared the following awful formula:—
"Neither I, nor my children, nor my grandchildren, [Pg 211]nor any of my descendants, will ever speak a friendly word to the new owner of my ancestral home. I wish the ghost of my ancestor, Hugh Lorrimer, who died in the Wars of the Roses, to haunt the new owner and his family; and I solemnly declare that I never will have part or lot with him or his."
This jargon43 had been made up by Harry, but each member of the feud, as they termed themselves, had solemnly repeated it, even down to little two-year-old Philip.
Suppose this wonderful, queer lady, who was making a sketch of Nell, was the new owner. In that case, it was Nell's duty to leave her at once.
"I want to ask you a question," said Nell.
"Yes—don't stir, please—ask me anything you like."
"Are you the new owner of my home?"
"I the new owner?" exclaimed Antonia. "Heavens! no! I own nothing except this"—she clasped her colour-box and looked up with a face of ecstacy. "I only want this," she said, "and this," she continued, waving her hand with an impressive sweep which was meant to include both earth and sky.
She claimed a good deal, Nell thought; but, after all, that did not matter, as she had nothing to do with the feud.
"I'm glad you are not the owner," said Nell, "for, if you were, I should have been obliged to leave you."
"Why so?"
"I and the others have sworn it solemnly round a bonfire."
The words were so unusual that Antonia was greatly amused.
[Pg 212]
"You don't like to leave the Towers, then?" she said.
"Like it?" replied Nell. "Would you, if you had lived here ever since the tenth century?"
"Mercy, child! how venerable I'd be!" exclaimed Antonia. She smiled in quite a tragic44 way—it was quite a new thing to see a smile on Antonia's face.
Nell looked at her very gravely. Her own sweet grey eyes grew full of tears.
She swayed herself backwards46 and forwards as she spoke28, in an ecstasy47 of pain. Strange to say, she seemed to understand Antonia, and, still stranger, Antonia understood her.
The priestess of art dropped her palette.
"Tell me about your father," she said, quickly; "tell me about yourself. You and your people have lived here for years—centuries—and it breaks your hearts to go? It's wonderfully artistic—it savours of mediæval romance. And you go for a creature like Susan Drummond—shallow as a plate—no soul anywhere about her? She gets your rooms replete48 with memories, and your dear briary avenues and your fir trees, and this uncultured waste?"
"It's a paddock," interrupted Nell, who could not quite follow Antonia's imagery.
"It's a waste," said Miss Bernard Temple, with fire. "The Towers is untrammelled by man's vulgar restraint. Child, I do not even know your name, but I think I understand your grief."
"You cannot," said Nell, with gentle dignity—"you are not a Lorrimer. But I'm glad I didn't vow39 [Pg 213]to hate you round the bonfire. Now I'm afraid I must go."
"One minute first," said Antonia. "Did you say that leaving this place would kill your father?"
"I'm afraid it will," said Nell. "He won't come home—mother can't get him to come back. He came the night he had sold the Towers, and Boris and I saw him; but I don't think he'll ever come back again. I think his heart is broken. But I cannot speak of it any longer, please—it hurts me so dreadfully here."
Nell had risen from the grass—she stood tall and thin and pale by Antonia's side. When she uttered the last words, she pressed her hand against her heart.
"Good-bye," she said solemnly. "Jane Macalister said I was to be in at twelve o'clock to help her with some darning. Good-bye."
Antonia held out one of her very long, very bony hands. She slipped it round Nell's waist, and drawing her close, kissed her gently between her eyebrows49, then she let her go.
Nell left the paddock; but Antonia did not attempt to finish her interrupted sketch. She sat on, lost in a world of musing50. At last she uttered some emphatic51 words aloud.
"I'm not much use," she said to herself; "nobody cares about me, and I care for no one. I love art with a divine passion; but art does not need such a poor, feeble disciple52. Art can still exist and be glorious without Antonia. I am ugly I know, and I have no genius; but I have got one power—I can get my own way. All my life long, through a queer kind of persistence53 which is in me, I have got my way. I do not get it because people love me, for I [Pg 214]don't honestly think a soul in the wide world loves me, but I get it because—because of something which I don't myself understand. It's a power I've got; it's my one gift. Did mother want me to study art in Paris? No; still I went. Did mother wish me to become grotesque54, and to wear a dress like this? No; still I wear it. Did mother intend me to come with her on Saturday to the Grange? No, a thousand times no; still I came. I can twist mother round this finger. She appeals to me; I counsel her; she asks my advice; she is obliged to take it whether she likes or not. Mother is completely under my thumb. So it was with the professor who taught me; so it was with the students who worked with me; so it will be in the future with Hester, if I still wish it; and with Sir John Thornton, if I ordain55 it. They think very little of Antonia now; but wait until they feel my power; wait until I choose to direct them, and—hey, presto—they walk in my paths, not their own. Now I have made up my mind on one point. I have not the faintest idea how it is to be managed; but managed it shall be. Susan Drummond and her father are not to desecrate56 the Towers with their commonplaceness, their shallowness, and vulgarity. The Lorrimers are still to live here; and Nell's heart is not to be broken. For the sake of the ugly duckling I do this. How, I know not; but I turn all the power that is in me in that one direction from this hour forward.
"Poor, ugly duckling with the pathetic eyes. I do believe Antonia loves you."
点击
收听单词发音
收听单词发音 |
1
squatting
|
|
| v.像动物一样蹲下( squat的现在分词 )；非法擅自占用（土地或房屋）；为获得其所有权；而占用某片公共用地。 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
2
contrived
|
|
| adj.不自然的，做作的；虚构的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
3
subdued
|
|
| adj. 屈服的，柔和的，减弱的 动词subdue的过去式和过去分词 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
4
crestfallen
|
|
| adj. 挫败的，失望的，沮丧的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
5
artistic
|
|
| adj.艺术(家)的，美术(家)的；善于艺术创作的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
6
awakened
|
|
| v.（使）醒( awaken的过去式和过去分词 )；（使）觉醒；弄醒；（使）意识到 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
7
frivolous
|
|
| adj.轻薄的；轻率的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
8
humble
|
|
| adj.谦卑的，恭顺的；地位低下的；v.降低，贬低 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
9
votary
|
|
| n.崇拜者；爱好者；adj.誓约的，立誓任圣职的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
10
shrine
|
|
| n.圣地，神龛，庙；v.将...置于神龛内，把...奉为神圣 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
11
awakening
|
|
| n.觉醒，醒悟 adj.觉醒中的；唤醒的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
12
sketch
|
|
| n.草图；梗概；素描；v.素描；概述 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
13
portfolio
|
|
| n.公事包；文件夹；大臣及部长职位 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
14
expend
|
|
| vt.花费，消费，消耗 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
15
robin
|
|
| n.知更鸟，红襟鸟 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
16
disported
|
|
| v.嬉戏，玩乐，自娱( disport的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
17
sniffed
|
|
| v.以鼻吸气，嗅，闻( sniff的过去式和过去分词 )；抽鼻子（尤指哭泣、患感冒等时出声地用鼻子吸气）；抱怨，不以为然地说 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
18
rusty
|
|
| adj.生锈的；锈色的；荒废了的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
19
affected
|
|
| adj.不自然的，假装的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
20
shrieks
|
|
| n.尖叫声( shriek的名词复数 )v.尖叫( shriek的第三人称单数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
21
downwards
|
|
| adj./adv.向下的（地），下行的（地） | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
22
sobs
|
|
| 啜泣（声），呜咽（声）( sob的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
23
sob
|
|
| n.空间轨道的轰炸机；呜咽，哭泣 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
24
ailed
|
|
| v.生病( ail的过去式和过去分词 )；感到不舒服；处境困难；境况不佳 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
25
prostrated
|
|
| v.使俯伏，使拜倒( prostrate的过去式和过去分词 )；（指疾病、天气等）使某人无能为力 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
26
misery
|
|
| n.痛苦，苦恼，苦难；悲惨的境遇，贫苦 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
27
inquiry
|
|
| n.打听，询问，调查，查问 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
28
spoke
|
|
| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
29
dabbed
|
|
| （用某物）轻触( dab的过去式和过去分词 )； 轻而快地擦掉（或抹掉）； 快速擦拭； （用某物）轻而快地涂上（或点上）… | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
30
imprison
|
|
| vt.监禁，关押，限制，束缚 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
31
distressing
|
|
| a.使人痛苦的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
32
imprisoned
|
|
| 下狱，监禁( imprison的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
33
hideous
|
|
| adj.丑陋的，可憎的，可怕的，恐怖的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
34
refreshing
|
|
| adj.使精神振作的，使人清爽的，使人喜欢的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
35
harry
|
|
| vt.掠夺，蹂躏，使苦恼 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
36
aggravating
|
|
| adj.恼人的，讨厌的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
37
fiery
|
|
| adj.燃烧着的，火红的；暴躁的；激烈的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
38
perfectly
|
|
| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
39
vow
|
|
| n.誓(言)，誓约；v.起誓，立誓 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
40
vowed
|
|
| 起誓，发誓（vow的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
41
feud
|
|
| n.长期不和；世仇；v.长期争斗；世代结仇 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
42
rite
|
|
| n.典礼，惯例，习俗 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
43
jargon
|
|
| n.术语，行话 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
44
tragic
|
|
| adj.悲剧的，悲剧性的，悲惨的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
45
smothered
|
|
| （使）窒息， （使）透不过气( smother的过去式和过去分词 )； 覆盖； 忍住； 抑制 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
46
backwards
|
|
| adv.往回地，向原处，倒，相反，前后倒置地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
47
ecstasy
|
|
| n.狂喜，心醉神怡，入迷 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
48
replete
|
|
| adj.饱满的，塞满的；n.贮蜜蚁 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
49
eyebrows
|
|
| 眉毛( eyebrow的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
50
musing
|
|
| n. 沉思，冥想 adj. 沉思的, 冥想的 动词muse的现在分词形式 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
51
emphatic
|
|
| adj.强调的，着重的；无可置疑的，明显的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
52
disciple
|
|
| n.信徒，门徒，追随者 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
53
persistence
|
|
| n.坚持，持续，存留 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
54
grotesque
|
|
| adj.怪诞的，丑陋的；n.怪诞的图案，怪人（物） | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
55
ordain
|
|
| vi.颁发命令；vt.命令，授以圣职，注定，任命 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
56
desecrate
|
|
| v.供俗用，亵渎，污辱 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
| 欢迎访问英文小说网 |