It may be urged against my use of the word incomparable that in the burglary business the name of Slith stands paramount6 and alone; and of this I am not ignorant; but Slith is a classic, and lived long ago, and knew nothing at all of modern competition; besides which the surprising nature of his doom7 has possibly cast a glamour8 upon Slith that exaggerates in our eyes his undoubted merits.
It must not be thought that I am a friend of Nuth's; on the contrary such politics as I have are on the side of Property; and he needs no words from me, for his position is almost unique in trade, being among the very few that do not need to advertise.
At the time that my story begins Nuth lived in a roomy house in Belgrave Square: in his inimitable way he had made friends with the caretaker. The place suited Nuth, and, whenever anyone came to inspect it before purchase, the caretaker used to praise the house in the words that Nuth had suggested. "If it wasn't for the drains," she would say, "it's the finest house in London," and when they pounced9 on this remark and asked questions about the drains, she would answer them that the drains also were good, but not so good as the house. They did not see Nuth when they went over the rooms, but Nuth was there.
Here in a neat black dress on one spring morning came an old woman whose bonnet10 was lined with red, asking for Mr. Nuth; and with her came her large and awkward son. Mrs. Eggins, the caretaker, glanced up the street, and then she let them in, and left them to wait in the drawing-room amongst furniture all mysterious with sheets. For a long while they waited, and then there was a smell of pipe-tobacco, and there was Nuth standing11 quite close to them.
"Lord," said the old woman whose bonnet was lined with red, "you did make me start." And then she saw by his eyes that that was not the way to speak to Mr. Nuth.
And at last Nuth spoke12, and very nervously13 the old woman explained that her son was a likely lad, and had been in business already but wanted to better himself, and she wanted Mr. Nuth to teach him a livelihood14.
First of all Nuth wanted to see a business reference, and when he was shown one from a jeweller with whom he happened to be hand-in-glove the upshot of it was that he agreed to take young Tonker (for this was the surname of the likely lad) and to make him his apprentice15. And the old woman whose bonnet was lined with red went back to her little cottage in the country, and every evening said to her old man, "Tonker, we must fasten the shutters16 of a night-time, for Tommy's a burglar now."
The details of the likely lad's apprenticeship17 I do not propose to give; for those that are in the business know those details already, and those that are in other businesses care only for their own, while men of leisure who have no trade at all would fail to appreciate the gradual degrees by which Tommy Tonker came first to cross bare boards, covered with little obstacles in the dark, without making any sound, and then to go silently up creaky stairs, and then to open doors, and lastly to climb.
Let it suffice that the business prospered18 greatly, while glowing reports of Tommy Tonker's progress were sent from time to time to the old woman whose bonnet was lined with red in the labourious handwriting of Nuth. Nuth had given up lessons in writing very early, for he seemed to have some prejudice against forgery19, and therefore considered writing a waste of time. And then there came the transaction with Lord Castlenorman at his Surrey residence. Nuth selected a Saturday night, for it chanced that Saturday was observed as Sabbath in the family of Lord Castlenorman, and by eleven o'clock the whole house was quiet. Five minutes before midnight Tommy Tonker, instructed by Mr. Nuth, who waited outside, came away with one pocketful of rings and shirt-studs. It was quite a light pocketful, but the jewellers in Paris could not match it without sending specially20 to Africa, so that Lord Castlenorman had to borrow bone shirt-studs.
Not even rumour21 whispered the name of Nuth. Were I to say that this turned his head, there are those to whom the assertion would give pain, for his associates hold that his astute22 judgment23 was unaffected by circumstance. I will say, therefore, that it spurred his genius to plan what no burglar had ever planned before. It was nothing less than to burgle the house of the gnoles. And this that abstemious24 man unfolded to Tonker over a cup of tea. Had Tonker not been nearly insane with pride over their recent transaction, and had he not been blinded by a veneration25 for Nuth, he would have—but I cry over spilt milk. He expostulated respectfully; he said he would rather not go; he said it was not fair; he allowed himself to argue; and in the end, one windy October morning with a menace in the air found him and Nuth drawing near to the dreadful wood.
Nuth, by weighing little emeralds against pieces of common rock, had ascertained26 the probable weight of those house-ornaments that the gnoles are believed to possess in the narrow, lofty house wherein they have dwelt from of old. They decided27 to steal two emeralds and to carry them between them on a cloak; but if they should be too heavy one must be dropped at once. Nuth warned young Tonker against greed, and explained that the emeralds were worth less than cheese until they were safe away from the dreadful wood.
Everything had been planned, and they walked now in silence.
No track led up to the sinister28 gloom of the trees, either of men or cattle; not even a poacher had been there snaring29 elves for over a hundred years. You did not trespass30 twice in the dells of the gnoles. And, apart from the things that were done there, the trees themselves were a warning, and did not wear the wholesome31 look of those that we plant ourselves.
The nearest village was some miles away with the backs of all its houses turned to the wood, and without one window at all facing in that direction. They did not speak of it there, and elsewhere it is unheard of.
Into this wood stepped Nuth and Tommy Tonker. They had no firearms. Tonker had asked for a pistol, but Nuth replied that the sound of a shot "would bring everything down on us," and no more was said about it.
Into the wood they went all day, deeper and deeper. They saw the skeleton of some early Georgian poacher nailed to a door in an oak tree; sometimes they saw a fairy scuttle32 away from them; once Tonker stepped heavily on a hard, dry stick, after which they both lay still for twenty minutes. And the sunset flared33 full of omens34 through the tree trunks, and night fell, and they came by fitful starlight, as Nuth had foreseen, to that lean, high house where the gnoles so secretly dwelt.
All was so silent by that unvalued house that the faded courage of Tonker flickered35 up, but to Nuth's experienced sense it seemed too silent; and all the while there was that look in the sky that was worse than a spoken doom, so that Nuth, as is often the case when men are in doubt, had leisure to fear the worst. Nevertheless he did not abandon the business, but sent the likely lad with the instruments of his trade by means of the ladder to the old green casement36. And the moment that Tonker touched the withered37 boards, the silence that, though ominous38, was earthly, became unearthly like the touch of a ghoul. And Tonker heard his breath offending against that silence, and his heart was like mad drums in a night attack, and a string of one of his sandals went tap on a rung of a ladder, and the leaves of the forest were mute, and the breeze of the night was still; and Tonker prayed that a mouse or a mole39 might make any noise at all, but not a creature stirred, even Nuth was still. And then and there, while yet he was undiscovered, the likely lad made up his mind, as he should have done long before, to leave those colossal40 emeralds where they were and have nothing further to do with the lean, high house of the gnoles, but to quit this sinister wood in the nick of time and retire from business at once and buy a place in the country. Then he descended41 softly and beckoned42 to Nuth. But the gnoles had watched him through knavish43 holes that they bore in trunks of the trees, and the unearthly silence gave way, as it were with a grace, to the rapid screams of Tonker as they picked him up from behind—screams that came faster and faster until they were incoherent. And where they took him it is not good to ask, and what they did with him I shall not say.
Nuth looked on for a while from the corner of the house with a mild surprise on his face as he rubbed his chin, for the trick of the holes in the trees was new to him; then he stole nimbly away through the dreadful wood.
"And did they catch Nuth?" you ask me, gentle reader.
"Oh, no, my child" (for such a question is childish). "Nobody ever catches Nuth."
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1
consummate
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| adj.完美的；v.成婚；使完美 [反]baffle | |
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2
blackmail
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| n.讹诈，敲诈，勒索，胁迫，恫吓 | |
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3
dealer
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| n.商人，贩子 | |
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4
tapestry
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| n.挂毯，丰富多采的画面 | |
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5
mouldering
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| v.腐朽( moulder的现在分词 )；腐烂，崩塌 | |
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6
paramount
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| a.最重要的，最高权力的 | |
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7
doom
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| n.厄运，劫数；v.注定，命定 | |
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8
glamour
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| n.魔力，魅力；vt.迷住 | |
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9
pounced
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| v.突然袭击( pounce的过去式和过去分词 )；猛扑；一眼看出；抓住机会（进行抨击） | |
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10
bonnet
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| n.无边女帽；童帽 | |
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11
standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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12
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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13
nervously
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| adv.神情激动地，不安地 | |
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14
livelihood
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| n.生计，谋生之道 | |
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15
apprentice
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| n.学徒，徒弟 | |
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16
shutters
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| 百叶窗( shutter的名词复数 )； （照相机的）快门 | |
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17
apprenticeship
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| n.学徒身份；学徒期 | |
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18
prospered
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| 成功，兴旺( prosper的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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19
forgery
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| n.伪造的文件等，赝品，伪造（行为） | |
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20
specially
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| adv.特定地；特殊地；明确地 | |
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21
rumour
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| n.谣言，谣传，传闻 | |
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22
astute
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| adj.机敏的，精明的 | |
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23
judgment
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| n.审判；判断力，识别力，看法，意见 | |
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24
abstemious
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| adj.有节制的，节俭的 | |
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25
veneration
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| n.尊敬，崇拜 | |
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26
ascertained
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| v.弄清，确定，查明( ascertain的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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decided
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| adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的 | |
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28
sinister
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| adj.不吉利的，凶恶的，左边的 | |
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29
snaring
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| v.用罗网捕捉，诱陷，陷害( snare的现在分词 ) | |
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30
trespass
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| n./v.侵犯，闯入私人领地 | |
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31
wholesome
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| adj.适合；卫生的；有益健康的；显示身心健康的 | |
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32
scuttle
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| v.急赶，疾走，逃避；n.天窗；舷窗 | |
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33
Flared
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| adj. 端部张开的, 爆发的, 加宽的, 漏斗式的 动词flare的过去式和过去分词 | |
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34
omens
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| n.前兆，预兆( omen的名词复数 ) | |
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35
flickered
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| （通常指灯光）闪烁，摇曳( flicker的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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36
casement
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| n.竖铰链窗；窗扉 | |
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37
withered
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| adj. 枯萎的，干瘪的，（人身体的部分器官）因病萎缩的或未发育良好的 动词wither的过去式和过去分词形式 | |
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38
ominous
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| adj.不祥的，不吉的，预兆的，预示的 | |
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39
mole
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| n.胎块；痣；克分子 | |
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40
colossal
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| adj.异常的，庞大的 | |
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41
descended
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| a.为...后裔的，出身于...的 | |
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42
beckoned
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| v.（用头或手的动作）示意，召唤( beckon的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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43
knavish
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| adj.无赖（似）的，不正的；刁诈 | |
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