For two months, Therese and Laurent had been struggling in the anguish1 of their union. One suffered through the other. Then hatred2 slowly gained them, and they ended by casting angry glances at one another, full of secret menace.
Hatred was forced to come. They had loved like brutes3, with hot passion, entirely4 sanguineous. Then, amidst the enervation5 of their crime, their love had turned to fright, and their kisses had produced a sort of physical terror. At present, amid the suffering which marriage, which life in common imposed on them, they revolted and flew into anger.
It was a bitter hatred, with terrible outbursts. They felt they were in the way of one another, and both inwardly said that they would lead a tranquil6 existence were they not always face to face. When in presence of each other, it seemed as if an enormous weight were stifling7 them, and they would have liked to remove this weight, to destroy it. Their lips were pinched, thoughts of violence passed in their clear eyes, and a craving8 beset10 them to devour11 one another.
In reality, one single thought tormented13 them: they were irritated at their crime, and in despair at having for ever troubled their lives. Hence all their anger and hatred. They felt the evil incurable14, that they would suffer for the murder of Camille until death, and this idea of perpetual suffering exasperated15 them. Not knowing whom to strike, they turned in hatred on one another.
They would not openly admit that their marriage was the final punishment of the murder; they refused to listen to the inner voice that shouted out the truth to them, displaying the story of their life before their eyes. And yet, in the fits of rage that bestirred them, they both saw clearly to the bottom of their anger, they were aware it was the furious impulse of their egotistic nature that had urged them to murder in order to satisfy their desire, and that they had only found in assassination17, an afflicted18 and intolerable existence. They recollected19 the past, they knew that their mistaken hopes of lust20 and peaceful happiness had alone brought them to remorse21. Had they been able to embrace one another in peace, and live in joy, they would not have mourned Camille, they would have fattened22 on their crime. But their bodies had rebelled, refusing marriage, and they inquired of themselves, in terror, where horror and disgust would lead them. They only perceived a future that would be horrible in pain, with a sinister23 and violent end.
Then, like two enemies bound together, and who were making violent efforts to release themselves from this forced embrace, they strained their muscles and nerves, stiffening24 their limbs without succeeding in releasing themselves. At last understanding that they would never be able to escape from their clasp, irritated by the cords cutting into their flesh, disgusted at their contact, feeling their discomfort25 increase at every moment, forgetful, and unable to bear their bonds a moment longer, they addressed outrageous26 reproaches to one another, in the hope of suffering loss, of dressing27 the wounds they inflicted28 on themselves, by cursing and deafening29 each other with their shouts and accusations30.
A quarrel broke out every evening. It looked as though the murderers sought opportunities to become exasperated so as to relax their rigid31 nerves. They watched one another, sounded one another with glances, examined the wounds of one another, discovering the raw parts, and taking keen pleasure in causing each other to yell in pain. They lived in constant irritation32, weary of themselves, unable to support a word, a gesture or a look, without suffering and frenzy33. Both their beings were prepared for violence; the least display of impatience34, the most ordinary contrariety increased immoderately in their disordered organism, and all at once, took the form of brutality35. A mere37 nothing raised a storm that lasted until the morrow. A plate too warm, an open window, a denial, a simple observation, sufficed to drive them into regular fits of madness.
In the course of the discussion, they never failed to bring up the subject of the drowned man. From sentence to sentence they came to mutual38 reproaches about this drowning business at Saint-Ouen, casting the crime in the face of one another. They grew excited to the pitch of fury, until one felt like murdering the other. Then ensued atrocious scenes of choking, blows, abominable39 cries, shameless brutalities. As a rule, Therese and Laurent became exasperated, in this manner, after the evening meal. They shut themselves up in the dining-room, so that the sound of their despair should not be heard. There, they could devour one another at ease. At the end of this damp apartment, of this sort of vault40, lighted by the yellow beams of the lamp, the tone of their voices took harrowing sharpness, amidst the silence and tranquillity41 of the atmosphere. And they did not cease until exhausted42 with fatigue43; then only could they go and enjoy a few hours' rest. Their quarrels became, in a measure, necessary to them--a means of procuring44 a few hours' rest by stupefying their nerves.
Madame Raquin listened. She never ceased to be there, in her armchair, her hands dangling45 on her knees, her head straight, her face mute. She heard everything, and not a shudder46 ran through her lifeless frame. Her eyes rested on the murderers with the most acute fixedness47. Her martyrdom must have been atrocious. She thus learned, detail by detail, all the events that had preceded and followed the murder of Camille. Little by little her ears became polluted with an account of the filth48 and crimes of those whom she had called her children.
These quarrels of the married couple placed her in possession of the most minute circumstances connected with the murder, and spread out, one by one, before her terrified mind, all the episodes of the horrible adventure. As she went deeper into this sanguinary filth, she pleaded in her mind for mercy, at times, she fancied she was touching49 the bottom of the infamy50, and still she had to descend51 lower. Each night, she learnt some new detail. The frightful52 story continued to expand before her. It seemed like being lost in an interminable dream of horror. The first avowal53 had been brutal36 and crushing, but she suffered more from these repeated blows, from these small facts which the husband and wife allowed to escape them in their fits of anger, and which lit up the crime with sinister rays. Once a day, this mother heard the account of the murder of her son; and, each day this account became more horrifying54, more replete55 with detail, and was shouted into her ears with greater cruelty and uproar56.
On one occasion, Therese, taken aback with remorse, at the sight of this wan57 countenance58, with great tears slowly coursing down its cheeks, pointed59 out her aunt to Laurent, beseeching60 him with a look to hold his tongue.
"Well, what of it? Leave me alone!" exclaimed the latter in a brutal tone, "you know very well that she cannot give us up. Am I more happy than she is? We have her cash, I have no need to constrain61 myself."
The quarrel continued, bitter and piercing, and Camille was killed over again. Neither Therese nor Laurent dared give way to the thoughts of pity that sometimes came over them, and shut the paralysed woman in her bedroom, when they quarrelled, so as to spare her the story of the crime. They were afraid of beating one another to death, if they failed to have this semi-corpse62 between them. Their pity yielded to cowardice63. They imposed ineffable64 sufferings on Madame Raquin because they required her presence to protect them against their hallucinations.
All their disputes were alike, and led to the same accusations. As soon as one of them accused the other of having killed this man, there came a frightful shock.
One night, at dinner, Laurent who sought a pretext65 for becoming irritable66, found that the water in the decanter was lukewarm. He declared that tepid67 water made him feel sick, and that he wanted it fresh.
"Very well, I will deprive myself of drinking," retorted Laurent.
"This water is excellent," said she.
"It is warm, and has a muddy taste," he answered. "It's like water from the river."
"Water from the river?" repeated Therese.
"Why do you cry?" asked Laurent, who foresaw the answer, and turned pale.
"I cry," sobbed71 the young woman, "I cry because--you know why--Oh! Great God! Great God! It was you who killed him."
"You lie!" shouted the murderer vehemently72, "confess that you lie. If I threw him into the Seine, it was you who urged me to commit the murder."
"I! I!" she exclaimed.
"Yes, you! Don't act the ignorant," he replied, "don't compel me to force you to tell the truth. I want you to confess your crime, to take your share in the murder. It will tranquillise and relieve me."
"But _I_ did not drown Camille," she pleaded.
"Yes, you did, a thousand times yes!" he shouted. "Oh! You feign73 astonishment74 and want of memory. Wait a moment, I will recall your recollections."
Rising from table, he bent75 over the young woman, and with crimson76 countenance, yelled in her face:
"You were on the river bank, you remember, and I said to you in an undertone: 'I am going to pitch him into the water.' Then you agreed to it, you got into the boat. You see that we murdered him together."
"It is not true," she answered. "I was crazy, I don't know what I did, but I never wanted to kill him. You alone committed the crime."
These denials tortured Laurent. As he had said, the idea of having an accomplice77 relieved him. Had he dared, he would have attempted to prove to himself that all the horror of the murder fell upon Therese. He more than once felt inclined to beat the young woman, so as to make her confess that she was the more guilty of the two.
He began striding up and down, shouting and raving9, followed by the piercing eyes of Madame Raquin.
"Ah! The wretch78! The wretch!" he stammered79 in a choking voice, "she wants to drive me mad. Look, did you not come up to my room one evening, did you not intoxicate80 me with your caresses81 to persuade me to rid you of your husband? You told me, when I visited you here, that he displeased82 you, that he had the odour of a sickly child. Did I think of all this three years ago? Was I a rascal83? I was leading the peaceful existence of an upright man, doing no harm to anybody. I would not have killed a fly."
"It was you who killed Camille," repeated Therese with such desperate obstinacy84 that she made Laurent lose his head.
"No, it was you, I say it was you," he retorted with a terrible burst of rage. "Look here, don't exasperate16 me, or if you do you'll suffer for it. What, you wretch, have you forgotten everything? You who maddened me with your caresses! Confess that it was all a calculation in your mind, that you hated Camille, and that you had wanted to kill him for a long time. No doubt you took me as a sweetheart, so as to drive me to put an end to him."
"It is not true," said she. "What you relate is monstrous85. You have no right to reproach me with my weakness towards you. I can speak in regard to you, as you speak of me. Before I knew you, I was a good woman, who never wronged a soul. If I drove you mad, it was you made me madder still. Listen Laurent, don't let us quarrel. I have too much to reproach you with."
"What can you reproach me with?" he inquired.
"No, nothing," she answered. "You did not save me from myself, you took advantage of my surrender, you chose to spoil my life. I forgive you all that. But, in mercy, do not accuse me of killing86 Camille. Keep your crime for yourself. Do not seek to make me more terrified than I am already."
Laurent raised his hand to strike her in the face.
"Beat me, I prefer that," said she, "I shall suffer less."
And she advanced her head. But he restrained himself, and taking a chair, sat down beside her.
"Listen," he began in a voice that he endeavoured to render calm, "it is cowardly to refuse to take your share in the crime. You know perfectly87 well that as we did the deed together, you know you are as guilty as I am. Why do you want to make my load heavier, by saying you are innocent? If you were so, you would not have consented to marry me. Just recall what passed during the two years following the murder. Do you want a proof? If so I will go and relate everything to the Public Prosecutor88, and you will see whether we are not both condemned90."
"Men may, perhaps, condemn89 me, but Camille knows very well that you did everything. He does not torment12 me at night as he does you."
"Camille leaves me in peace," said Laurent, pale and trembling, "it is you who see him before you in your nightmares. I have heard you shout out."
"Don't say that," angrily exclaimed the young woman. "I have never shouted out. I don't wish the spectre to appear. Oh! I understand, you want to drive it away from yourself. I am innocent, I am innocent!"
They looked at one another in terror, exhausted with fatigue, fearing they had evoked92 the corpse of the drowned man. Their quarrels invariably ended in this way; they protested their innocence93, they sought to deceive themselves, so as to drive away their bad dreams. They made constant efforts, each in turn, to reject the responsibility of the crime, defending themselves as though they were before a judge and jury, and accusing one another.
The strangest part of this attitude was that they did not succeed in duping themselves by their oaths. Both had a perfect recollection of all the circumstances connected with the murder, and their eyes avowed94 what their lips denied.
Their falsehoods were puerile95, their affirmations ridiculous. It was the wordy dispute of two wretches96 who lied for the sake of lying, without succeeding in concealing97 from themselves that they did so. Each took the part of accuser in turn, and although the prosecution98 they instituted against one another proved barren of result, they began it again every evening with cruel tenacity99.
They were aware that they would prove nothing, that they would not succeed in effacing100 the past, and still they attempted this task, still they returned to the charge, spurred on by pain and terror, vanquished101 in advance by overwhelming reality. The sole advantage they derived102 from their disputes, consisted in producing a tempest of words and cries, and the riot occasioned in this manner momentarily deafened103 them.
And all the time their anger lasted, all the time they were accusing one another, the paralysed woman never ceased to gaze at them. Ardent104 joy sparkled in her eyes, when Laurent raised his broad hand above the head of Therese.
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1
anguish
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| n.(尤指心灵上的)极度痛苦，烦恼 | |
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hatred
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| n.憎恶，憎恨，仇恨 | |
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3
brutes
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| 兽( brute的名词复数 )； 畜生； 残酷无情的人； 兽性 | |
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entirely
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| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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enervation
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| n.无活力，衰弱 | |
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tranquil
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| adj. 安静的, 宁静的, 稳定的, 不变的 | |
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stifling
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| a.令人窒息的 | |
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craving
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| n.渴望,热望 | |
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raving
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| adj.说胡话的；疯狂的，怒吼的；非常漂亮的；令人醉心[痴心]的v.胡言乱语(rave的现在分词)n.胡话；疯话adv.胡言乱语地；疯狂地 | |
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beset
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| v.镶嵌；困扰，包围 | |
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devour
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| v.吞没；贪婪地注视或谛听，贪读；使着迷 | |
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12
torment
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| n.折磨；令人痛苦的东西(人)；vt.折磨；纠缠 | |
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13
tormented
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| 饱受折磨的 | |
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incurable
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| adj.不能医治的，不能矫正的，无救的；n.不治的病人，无救的人 | |
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15
exasperated
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| adj.恼怒的 | |
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exasperate
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| v.激怒，使（疾病）加剧，使恶化 | |
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assassination
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| n.暗杀；暗杀事件 | |
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afflicted
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| 使受痛苦，折磨( afflict的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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recollected
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| adj.冷静的；镇定的；被回忆起的；沉思默想的v.记起，想起( recollect的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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lust
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| n.性(淫)欲；渴(欲)望；vi.对…有强烈的欲望 | |
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21
remorse
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| n.痛恨，悔恨，自责 | |
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22
fattened
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| v.喂肥( fatten的过去式和过去分词 )；养肥（牲畜）；使（钱）增多；使（公司）升值 | |
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sinister
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| adj.不吉利的，凶恶的，左边的 | |
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24
stiffening
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| n. (使衣服等)变硬的材料, 硬化 动词stiffen的现在分词形式 | |
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discomfort
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| n.不舒服，不安，难过，困难，不方便 | |
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outrageous
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| adj.无理的，令人不能容忍的 | |
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dressing
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| n.(食物)调料；包扎伤口的用品，敷料 | |
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inflicted
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| 把…强加给，使承受，遭受( inflict的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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deafening
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| adj. 振耳欲聋的, 极喧闹的 动词deafen的现在分词形式 | |
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30
accusations
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| n.指责( accusation的名词复数 )；指控；控告；（被告发、控告的）罪名 | |
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rigid
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| adj.严格的，死板的；刚硬的，僵硬的 | |
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irritation
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| n.激怒，恼怒，生气 | |
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frenzy
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| n.疯狂，狂热，极度的激动 | |
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impatience
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| n.不耐烦，急躁 | |
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brutality
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| n.野蛮的行为，残忍，野蛮 | |
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brutal
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| adj.残忍的，野蛮的，不讲理的 | |
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mere
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| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
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mutual
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| adj.相互的，彼此的；共同的，共有的 | |
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abominable
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| adj.可厌的，令人憎恶的 | |
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vault
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| n.拱形圆顶，地窖，地下室 | |
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41
tranquillity
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| n. 平静, 安静 | |
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42
exhausted
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| adj.极其疲惫的，精疲力尽的 | |
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fatigue
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| n.疲劳，劳累 | |
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44
procuring
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| v.（努力）取得， （设法）获得( procure的现在分词 )；拉皮条 | |
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45
dangling
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| 悬吊着( dangle的现在分词 )； 摆动不定； 用某事物诱惑…； 吊胃口 | |
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46
shudder
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| v.战粟，震动，剧烈地摇晃；n.战粟，抖动 | |
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47
fixedness
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| n.固定；稳定；稳固 | |
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48
filth
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| n.肮脏，污物，污秽；淫猥 | |
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touching
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| adj.动人的，使人感伤的 | |
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50
infamy
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| n.声名狼藉，出丑，恶行 | |
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51
descend
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| vt./vi.传下来，下来，下降 | |
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52
frightful
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| adj.可怕的；讨厌的 | |
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53
avowal
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| n.公开宣称，坦白承认 | |
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54
horrifying
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| a.令人震惊的，使人毛骨悚然的 | |
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55
replete
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| adj.饱满的，塞满的；n.贮蜜蚁 | |
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56
uproar
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| n.骚动，喧嚣，鼎沸 | |
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57
wan
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| (wide area network)广域网 | |
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58
countenance
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| n.脸色，面容；面部表情；vt.支持，赞同 | |
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59
pointed
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| adj.尖的，直截了当的 | |
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60
beseeching
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| adj.恳求似的v.恳求，乞求（某事物）( beseech的现在分词 ) | |
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61
constrain
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| vt.限制，约束；克制，抑制 | |
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62
corpse
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| n.尸体，死尸 | |
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63
cowardice
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| n.胆小，怯懦 | |
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64
ineffable
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| adj.无法表达的，不可言喻的 | |
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65
pretext
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| n.借口，托词 | |
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66
irritable
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| adj.急躁的；过敏的；易怒的 | |
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67
tepid
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| adj.微温的，温热的，不太热心的 | |
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68
procure
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| vt.获得，取得，促成；vi.拉皮条 | |
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69
sobbing
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| <主方>Ⅰ adj.湿透的 | |
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70
juncture
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| n.时刻，关键时刻，紧要关头 | |
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71
sobbed
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| 哭泣，啜泣( sob的过去式和过去分词 )； 哭诉，呜咽地说 | |
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72
vehemently
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| adv. 热烈地 | |
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73
feign
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| vt.假装，佯作 | |
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74
astonishment
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| n.惊奇，惊异 | |
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75
bent
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| n.爱好，癖好；adj.弯的；决心的，一心的 | |
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crimson
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| n./adj.深(绯)红色(的)；vi.脸变绯红色 | |
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77
accomplice
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| n.从犯，帮凶，同谋 | |
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wretch
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| n.可怜的人，不幸的人；卑鄙的人 | |
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stammered
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| v.结巴地说出( stammer的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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intoxicate
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| vt.使喝醉，使陶醉，使欣喜若狂 | |
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caresses
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| 爱抚，抚摸( caress的名词复数 ) | |
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displeased
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| a.不快的 | |
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rascal
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| n.流氓；不诚实的人 | |
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obstinacy
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| n.顽固；（病痛等）难治 | |
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85
monstrous
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| adj.巨大的；恐怖的；可耻的，丢脸的 | |
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86
killing
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| n.巨额利润；突然赚大钱，发大财 | |
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perfectly
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| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
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prosecutor
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| n.起诉人；检察官，公诉人 | |
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condemn
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| vt.谴责，指责；宣判(罪犯)，判刑 | |
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90
condemned
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| adj. 被责难的, 被宣告有罪的 动词condemn的过去式和过去分词 | |
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shuddered
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| v.战栗( shudder的过去式和过去分词 )；发抖；（机器、车辆等）突然震动；颤动 | |
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evoked
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| [医]诱发的 | |
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innocence
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| n.无罪；天真；无害 | |
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avowed
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| adj.公开声明的，承认的v.公开声明，承认( avow的过去式和过去分词) | |
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puerile
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| adj.幼稚的，儿童的 | |
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wretches
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| n.不幸的人( wretch的名词复数 )；可怜的人；恶棍；坏蛋 | |
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concealing
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| v.隐藏，隐瞒，遮住( conceal的现在分词 ) | |
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prosecution
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| n.起诉，告发，检举，执行，经营 | |
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tenacity
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| n.坚韧 | |
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100
effacing
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| 谦逊的 | |
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vanquished
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| v.征服( vanquish的过去式和过去分词 )；战胜；克服；抑制 | |
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102
derived
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| vi.起源；由来；衍生；导出v.得到( derive的过去式和过去分词 )；（从…中）得到获得；源于；（从…中）提取 | |
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103
deafened
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| 使聋( deafen的过去式和过去分词 )； 使隔音 | |
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ardent
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| adj.热情的，热烈的，强烈的，烈性的 | |
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