One amelioration is mine. I have lately received from the stately publishing house of McMurwood a letter in character. It is now time for my book to go into a final form and become a CLASSIC. Surprise number 1: as I thought only Vergil, Homer, Aristophanes and Co. were CLASSICS and that to couple the word with a LOCAL CACKLER would be blasphemy2 or caricature. Surprise number 2: that I could have any say in a re-issue. Could the book be stopped altogether? Through imaginary characters being identified with real people I was accused of belittling3 my connections, but if no more books were forthcoming those in circulation would die of old age and disappear and we could all sink to peace. In future I could have a nom de plume4, carefully guarded, so that my attempts could be taken on their own demerits without the impetus5 of scandal. Conventional people and I would not then suffer from a relationship uncongenial to both parties and for which neither is responsible.
Messrs. McMurwood met my wishes as if I were a real person—an experience to give me back a shred6 of self-confidence. Honesty and decency7 are basic necessities, but good manners are to the sensibilities as cream and honey to the tongue. Certainly I can withdraw the book. Would I care for a number of the remaining copies for my own use? No, not one. And that was that. If only I had known this after the first edition: but a number of LOCAL CACKLERS had given me the benefit of their EXPERIENCE with MSS bought and published on Australia’s own publishing hook. They had been given ten or twenty pounds, and though the works in some instances sold as well or better than mine, the authors were not entitled to nor did they receive a penny beyond the first amount, nor were they allowed any control even in revising subsequent editions. There was a case where learning by another’s EXPERIENCE resulted in knowledge as limiting as ignorance.
I am now twenty. The years have passed droughtily in a personal as well as a meteorological sense. If eel8 so terribly old. I have dried up in this barren gully while there are such glorious places elsewhere. If only I had a view of mountains or of the sea in storm, or in sun too calm for waves but glinting like the silver gum leaves in the noonday light, this would be to know wealth despite money poverty.
Only the trouble with God has abated9. LIFE and LOVE and WORK insist increasingly. The need to submit to marriage or else find some other way of earning my living grows nearer, clearer, deadlier than before. Fortunately Henry Beauchamp has had to go to Queensland again to look after his property. It is a safe distance offering respite10 for the present.
The idea of marriage is going bung with me. Marriage is unnecessarily engulfing11 and too full of opportunities to experience GREY TOPPER’S receipt for producing genius.
Henry once said that he would be jealous of my writing if it took up my spare time when he needed me. In short, my brain-children would be proscribed12. I am weary of Henry’s indulgent but inflexible13 assumption that my ideas are mere14 vivacity15 or girlish coquetry, which motherhood will extirpate16. I can discern under the padded glove of spooniness the fixed17 determination to bend me to prescribed femaleness. Ah, no, m’lord, the bait is not sufficiently18 enticing19, nor does it entirely20 conceal21 the hook.
I have refuged in day-dreams, but one must have more than these on which to expend22 emotion: there must be some object of passion, personal or public. Mine is the beauty of the universe. And there is always England. England with her ancient historic beauty—tradition—the racial rooftree. I picture her cool green fields, her misty23 downs, her bare woods under the snow, her young leaves and soft flowers in spring. Her castles and cathedrals, her ivied towers, her brooks24 are as clear to my nostrils25 and closed eyes as the scents26 and features of ‘Possum Gully. And there is London with its romantic fogs, its crowds and ceremonial pageants27, Rotten Row and the Mall, the British Museum, the Mansion28 House, The Tower and Westminster. I know London much better than I do Sydney. Through song and story it has permeated29 every fibre of my mind since I could first scan a pictured page, while I have spent scarcely a month in but one corner of Sydney. London—THE BIG SMOKE—London, where our dreams come true.
England acclaimed30 my first homespun effort. England may welcome my second and third. I will arise and go to Mother England.
Lady Jane’s column is devoted31 to escapees. Sculptors32, writers, singers, actors, painters, educationists, politicians all depart inevitably33. I have been going with them in imagination ever since I saw the Heads standing34 up there with the spray playing around their base and the Pacific beyond like a high blue plateau. It seems that only those remain who cannot get away, those who are tied to pots and pans by poverty and ignorance, by misfortune or incompetence35.
The seasons have smiled once more. The chief reminder36 of the drought which killed the stock and bared the paddocks is that here and there a spot of richer green shows where in death some animal fertilised its pasture. The doubled value of remaining stock compensates37 for what was lost. Ridge38 and gully echo the cry of young things which replenish39 the earth.
The day is lovely in the atmosphere and ample draperies of November. Even ‘Possum Gully, like a plain girl when happy, has a meed of beauty. The afternoon is hot and clear as though the sun were a box-wood fire. The flowers droop40 their heads in the fierce proud heat, lizards41 bask42 in the glare, the poultry43 spread their wings and pant in the shade, the cows lie in the reeds of the waterhole on the flat, the horses stand head to tail in pairs under the quince hedge rising above the orchard44 fence and stamp and switch the flies off themselves.
A tiny breeze goes flirting45 through the last of afternoon, the eschscholtzias furl their silken petals46. I have ascended47 the hill behind which the sun departs and where a thousand times I have watched him gleam red as a fire between the trunks of the grey messmates and powdered brittle-gums. To the east, amid wild hop48 scrub and stringy-barks, a bridle49 track threads its way to the crisp main road to Goulburn, and on and on to Sydney, where the sea tracks lead on to the WORLD.
The final gleam of the sun kisses the waterhole, the shadows grow long and dark, reversing their morning journey. The rumble50 of a train miles distant bears my heart on its rhythm of departure. The kookaburras are laughing themselves to sleep, chorus answering chorus—coda—da capo—finale. The gentle curlews lure51 me farther into the scrub, where I still can see the departing sun and the afterglow falling far away through a gap in the ranges on to one of the bright rich plains of an early holding.
The flaunting52 afterglow melts and passes, the evening star is bright and bold, and throws a spark in the dam of the back paddock at the fall of the she-oak ridge where the night birds call in unmolested scrubs and flap slowly from tree to tree. A tremor53 of night runs along the seeding grasses.
A wise old moon slowly chases the shadows westward54 once again and laps all in her silver enchantment55. A thousand jewels flash above the dark shadows as she catches the eyes of the flock camped on the rise.
Beauty is abroad. Under her spell the voices of the great world call me. To them I give ear and go.
THE END
点击收听单词发音
1 federation | |
n.同盟,联邦,联合,联盟,联合会 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
2 blasphemy | |
n.亵渎,渎神 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
3 belittling | |
使显得微小,轻视,贬低( belittle的现在分词 ) | |
参考例句: |
|
|
4 plume | |
n.羽毛;v.整理羽毛,骚首弄姿,用羽毛装饰 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
5 impetus | |
n.推动,促进,刺激;推动力 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
6 shred | |
v.撕成碎片,变成碎片;n.碎布条,细片,些少 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
7 decency | |
n.体面,得体,合宜,正派,庄重 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
8 eel | |
n.鳗鲡 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
9 abated | |
减少( abate的过去式和过去分词 ); 减去; 降价; 撤消(诉讼) | |
参考例句: |
|
|
10 respite | |
n.休息,中止,暂缓 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
11 engulfing | |
adj.吞噬的v.吞没,包住( engulf的现在分词 ) | |
参考例句: |
|
|
12 proscribed | |
v.正式宣布(某事物)有危险或被禁止( proscribe的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句: |
|
|
13 inflexible | |
adj.不可改变的,不受影响的,不屈服的 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
14 mere | |
adj.纯粹的;仅仅,只不过 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
15 vivacity | |
n.快活,活泼,精神充沛 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
16 extirpate | |
v.除尽,灭绝 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
17 fixed | |
adj.固定的,不变的,准备好的;(计算机)固定的 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
18 sufficiently | |
adv.足够地,充分地 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
19 enticing | |
adj.迷人的;诱人的 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
20 entirely | |
ad.全部地,完整地;完全地,彻底地 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
21 conceal | |
v.隐藏,隐瞒,隐蔽 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
22 expend | |
vt.花费,消费,消耗 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
23 misty | |
adj.雾蒙蒙的,有雾的 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
24 brooks | |
n.小溪( brook的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句: |
|
|
25 nostrils | |
鼻孔( nostril的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句: |
|
|
26 scents | |
n.香水( scent的名词复数 );气味;(动物的)臭迹;(尤指狗的)嗅觉 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
27 pageants | |
n.盛装的游行( pageant的名词复数 );穿古代服装的游行;再现历史场景的娱乐活动;盛会 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
28 mansion | |
n.大厦,大楼;宅第 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
29 permeated | |
弥漫( permeate的过去式和过去分词 ); 遍布; 渗入; 渗透 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
30 acclaimed | |
adj.受人欢迎的 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
31 devoted | |
adj.忠诚的,忠实的,热心的,献身于...的 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
32 sculptors | |
雕刻家,雕塑家( sculptor的名词复数 ); [天]玉夫座 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
33 inevitably | |
adv.不可避免地;必然发生地 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
34 standing | |
n.持续,地位;adj.永久的,不动的,直立的,不流动的 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
35 incompetence | |
n.不胜任,不称职 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
36 reminder | |
n.提醒物,纪念品;暗示,提示 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
37 compensates | |
补偿,报酬( compensate的第三人称单数 ); 给(某人)赔偿(或赔款) | |
参考例句: |
|
|
38 ridge | |
n.山脊;鼻梁;分水岭 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
39 replenish | |
vt.补充;(把…)装满;(再)填满 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
40 droop | |
v.低垂,下垂;凋萎,萎靡 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
41 lizards | |
n.蜥蜴( lizard的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句: |
|
|
42 bask | |
vt.取暖,晒太阳,沐浴于 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
43 poultry | |
n.家禽,禽肉 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
44 orchard | |
n.果园,果园里的全部果树,(美俚)棒球场 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
45 flirting | |
v.调情,打情骂俏( flirt的现在分词 ) | |
参考例句: |
|
|
46 petals | |
n.花瓣( petal的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句: |
|
|
47 ascended | |
v.上升,攀登( ascend的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句: |
|
|
48 hop | |
n.单脚跳,跳跃;vi.单脚跳,跳跃;着手做某事;vt.跳跃,跃过 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
49 bridle | |
n.笼头,束缚;vt.抑制,约束;动怒 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
50 rumble | |
n.隆隆声;吵嚷;v.隆隆响;低沉地说 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
51 lure | |
n.吸引人的东西,诱惑物;vt.引诱,吸引 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
52 flaunting | |
adj.招摇的,扬扬得意的,夸耀的v.炫耀,夸耀( flaunt的现在分词 );有什么能耐就施展出来 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
53 tremor | |
n.震动,颤动,战栗,兴奋,地震 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
54 westward | |
n.西方,西部;adj.西方的,向西的;adv.向西 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
55 enchantment | |
n.迷惑,妖术,魅力 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
欢迎访问英文小说网 |