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首页 » 儿童英文小说 » 歪歪小学的荒诞故事 Sideways Stories from Wayside School » Chapter 8
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Chapter 8
Myron had big ears. He was elected class president. The children in Mrs. Jewls's class expected him to be a good president. Other presidents were good speakers. Myron was even better. He was a good listener.

But he had a problem. He didn't know what a class president was supposed to do. So he asked.

"What am I supposed to do?"

"It's a difficult job," said Mrs. Jewls. "But you can do it. You must turn the lights on every morning and turn them off at the end of the day."

"What?" asked Myron.
32"As a class president you must learn to listen," said Mrs. Jewls. "I'll repeat myself only one more time. You must turn the lights on every morning-"
"I heard you the first time," said Myron. "It just doesn't sound like much of a job."

"It certainly is!" said Mrs. Jewls. "Without light I can't teach, and the children can't learn. Only you can give us that light. I think it is a very important job."

"I guess so," said Myron. He wasn't convinced.

"Here, let me show you how to work a light switch," said Mrs. Jewls.

"I already know how," said Myron. "I've been turning lights on and off all my life."

"Very good!" said Mrs. Jewls. "You'll make a fine president."

Myron wanted to be the best president ever. But it was such an easy job, he thought, that anybody could do it. When school let out that day, Myron stayed behind. He turned out the lights by flicking the switch down.

"Excellent!" said Mrs. Jewls.

On his way home, Myron heard a horrible noise. First there was a loud screeching, then a sharp squeal, a roaring engine, and then the very faint sound of a girl crying.

Myron ran to see what had happened.

Dana was bent over in the middle of the road.

"What's the matter?" asked Myron.

"My dog, Pugsy, was hit by a car," Dana cried.

"Who did it?" asked Myron.

"I don't know!" Dana sobbed. "They sped away."
33"Well, that's not important," said Myron. "We've got to try to save Pugsy."
Pugsy lay unconscious in the street. Myron carefully picked her up. He carried her two miles to the vet. Dana cried at his side.

"Don't worry, Dana," said Myron. "She'll be all right." But he wasn't really so sure.

He gave Pugsy to the vet, walked Dana home, then walked home himself.

Dana was so upset that she forgot to thank him. Myron didn't mind. He thought that was what being class president was all about.

The next morning, before he went to school, Myron went to Dana's house. Pugsy was there. She seemed all right.

Dana petted her. Pugsy licked her face.

"See, Myron, she's all right," said Dana. "The vet said that you brought her in just in time."

"Hi, Pugsy," said Myron. He petted her.

Pugsy bit his hand.

"I guess she doesn't know you," said Dana. "She was unconscious yesterday when you saved her life."

Dana's mother put some medicine and a Band-Aid on Myron's hand. Then she drove the children to school.

They were late. They ran up the stairs to Mrs. Jewls's class. The room was completely dark.

"It's about time you got here, Myron," said Mrs. Jewls. "We have no lights."

"Why didn't somebody else just turn them on?" asked Myron.

"Because you're class president," said Mrs. Jewls.
34"Show Stephen how to work the lights. From now on he will be class president."
Myron showed Stephen how to turn on the lights. He flicked the switch up.

At the end of the day, Myron showed Stephen how to turn the lights off. He flicked the switch down.

After a week, Stephen finally caught on. He made a good president. The lights were on every morning.

Myron, who was president for only a day, was the best president in the history of Wayside School. It was just that nobody knew it.


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