Beyond her relief at this escape she did not know these first few minutes what she thought or felt. Too much had happened, and what had happened had all turned out so differently from what she had expected, for her to set in orderly array this chaos4 of reactions within herself and read the meaning of that afternoon's visit. She managed, with a great effort, to keep under control the outer extremities5 of her senses, and thus respond with the correct “yes” or “no” or “indeed” when some response from her was required by Dick's happy conversation.
Near Roslyn they swung off the turnpike into an unfrequented, shady road. Dick steered6 to one side beneath a locust-tree and silenced the motor.
“Why are you stopping?” she asked in sudden alarm.
“So we can talk without a piece of impertinent machinery7 roaring interruptions at us,” replied Dick with forced lightness. And then in a voice he could not make light: “I want to talk to you about—about my sister. Isn't she splendid?”
“She is!” There was no wavering of her thoughts as Maggie emphatically said this.
“I'm mighty8 glad you like her. She certainly liked you. She's all the family I've got, and since you two hit it off so well together I hope—I hope, Maggie—”
And then Dick plunged9 into it, stammeringly10, but earnestly. He told her how much he loved her, in old phrases that his boyish ardor11 made vibrantly12 new. He loved her! And if she would marry him, her influence would make him take the brace13 all his friends had urged upon him. She'd make him a man! And she could see how pleased it would make his sister. And he would do his best to make Maggie happy—his very best!
The young super-adventuress—she herself had mentally used the word “adventuress” in thinking of herself, as being more genteel and mentally aristocratic than the cruder words by which Barney and Old Jimmie and their kind designated a woman accomplice—this young super-adventuress, who had schemed all this so adroitly14, and worked toward it with the best of her brain and her conscious charm, was seized with new panic as she listened to the eager torrent15 of his imploring16 words, as she gazed into the quivering earnestness of his frank, blue-eyed face. She wished she could get out of the machine and run away or sink through the floor-boards of the car. For she really liked Dick.
“I'm—I'm not so good as you think,” she whispered. And then some unsuspected force within her impelled17 her to say: “Dick, if you knew the truth—”
He caught her shoulders. “I know all the truth about you I want to know! You're wonderful, and I love you! Will you marry me? Answer that. That's all I want to know!”
He had checked the confession18 that impulsively19 had surged toward her lips. Silent, her eyes wide, her breath coming sharply, she sat gazing at him.... And then from out the portion of her brain where were stored her purposes, and the momentum20 of her pride and determination, there flashed the realization21 that she had won! The thing that Barney and Old Jimmie had prepared and she had so skillfully worked toward, was at last achieved! She had only to say “yes,” and either of those two plans which Barney had outlined could at once be put in operation—and there could be no doubt of the swift success of either. Dick's eager, trusting face was guarantee that there would come no obstruction22 from him.
She felt that in some strange way she had been caught in a trap. Yes, what they had worked for, they had won! And yet, in this moment of winning, as elements of her vast dizziness, Maggie felt sick and ashamed—felt a frenzied23 desire to run away from the whole affair. For Maggie, cynical24, all-confident, and eighteen, was proving really a very poor adventuress.
“Please, Maggie”—his imploring voice broke in upon her—“won't you answer me? You like me, don't you?—you'll marry me, won't you?”
“I like you, Dick,” she choked out—and it was some slight comfort to her to be telling this much of the truth—“but—but I can't marry you.”
“Maggie!” It was a cry of surprised pain, and the pain in his voice shot acutely into her. “From the way you acted toward me—I thought—I hoped—” He sharply halted the accusation25 which had risen to his lips. “I'm not going to take that answer as final, Maggie,” he said doggedly26. “I'm going to give you more time to think it over—more time for me to try. Then I'll ask you again.”
That which prompted Maggie's response was a mixture of impulses: the desire, and this offered opportunity, to escape; and a faint reassertion of the momentum of her purpose. For with one such as Maggie, the set purposes may be seemingly overwhelmed, but death comes hard.
“All right,” she breathed rapidly. “Only please get me back as quickly as you can. I'm to have dinner with my—my cousin, and I'll be very late.”
Dick drove her into the city in almost unbroken silence and left her at the great doors of the Grantham, abustle with a dozen lackeys27 in purple livery. She stood a moment and watched him drive away. He really was a nice boy—Dick.
As she shot up the elevator, she thought of a hitherto forgotten element of that afternoon's bewildering situation. Barney Palmer! And Barney was, she knew, now up in her sitting-room28, impatiently waiting for her report of what he had good reason to believe would prove a successful experience. If she told the truth—that Dick had proposed, just as they had planned for him to do—and she had refused him—why, Barney—!
She seemed caught on every side!
Maggie got into her suite29 by way of her bedroom. She wanted time to gather her wits for meeting Barney. When Miss Grierson told her that her cousin was still waiting to take her to dinner, she requested her companion to inform Barney that she would be in as soon as she had dressed. She wasted all the time she legitimately30 could in changing into a dinner-gown, and when at length she stepped into her sitting-room she was to Barney's eye the same cool Maggie as always.
Barney rose as she entered. He was in smart dinner jacket; these days Barney was wearing the smartest of everything that money could secure. There was a shadow of impatience31 on his face, but it was instantly dissipated by Maggie's self-composed, direct-eyed beauty.
“How'd you come out with Miss Sherwood?” he whispered eagerly.
“Well enough for her to kiss me good-bye, and beg me to come again.”
“I've got to hand it to you, Maggie! You're sure some swell32 actress—you've sure got class!” His dark eyes gleamed on her with half a dozen pleasures: admiration33 of what she was in herself—admiration of what she had just achieved—anticipation of results, many results—anticipation of what she was later to mean to him in a personal way. “If you can put it over on a swell like Miss Sherwood, you can put it over on any one!” He exulted34. “As soon as we clean up this job in hand, we'll move on to one big thing after another!”
And then out came the question Maggie had been bracing35 herself for: “How about Dick Sherwood? Did he finally come across with that proposal?”
“No,” Maggie answered steadily36.
“No? Why not?” exclaimed Barney sharply. “I thought that was all that was holding him back—waiting for his sister to look you over and give you her O.K.?”
Maggie had decided37 that her air of cool, indifferent certainty was the best manner to use in this situation with Barney. So she shrugged38 her white shoulders.
“How can I tell what makes a man do something, and what makes him not do it?”
“But did he seem any less interested in you than before?” Barney pursued.
“No,” replied Maggie.
“Then maybe he's just waiting to get up his nerve. He'll ask you, all right; nothing there for us to worry about. Come on, let's have dinner. I'm starved.”
On the roof of the Grantham they were excellently served; for Barney knew how to order a dinner, and he knew the art, which is an alchemistic mixture of suave39 diplomacy40 and the insinuated41 power and purpose of murder, of handling head-waiters and their sub-autocrats. Having no other business in hand, Barney devoted42 himself to that business which ran like a core through all his businesses—paying court to Maggie. And when Barney wished to be a courtier, there were few of his class who could give a better superficial interpretation43 of the role; and in this particular instance he was at the advantage of being in earnest. He forced the most expensive tidbits announced by the dinner card upon Maggie; he gallantly44 and very gracefully45 put on and removed, as required by circumstances, the green cobweb of a scarf Maggie had brought to the roof as protection against the elements; and when he took the dancing-floor with her, he swung her about and hopped46 up and down and stepped in and out with all the skill of a master of the modern perversion47 of dancing. Barney was really good enough to have been a professional dancer had his desires not led him toward what seemed to him a more exciting and more profitable career.
Maggie, not to rouse Barney's suspicions, played her role as well as he did his own. And most of the other diners, a fraction of the changing two or three hundred thousand people from the South and West who choose New York as the best of all summer resorts, gazed upon this handsome couple with their intricate steps which were timed with such effortless and enviable accuracy, and excitedly believed that they were beholding48 two distinguished49 specimens50 of what their home papers persisted in calling New York's Four Hundred.
Maggie got back to her room with the feeling that she had staved off Barney and her numerous other dilemmas51 for the immediate52 present. Her chief thought in the many events of the day had been only to escape her dangers and difficulties for the moment; all the time she had known that her real thinking, her real decisions, were for a later time when she was not so driven by the press of unexpected circumstances. That less stressful time was now beginning.
What was she to do next? What were to be her final decisions? And what, in all this strange ferment53, was likely to germinate54 as possible forces against her?
She mulled these things over for several days, during which Dick came to see her twice, and twice proposed, and was twice put off. She had quiet now, and was most of the time alone, but that clarity which she had expected, that quickness and surety of purpose which she had always believed to be unfailingly hers, refused to come.
She tried to have it otherwise, but the outstanding figure in her meditations55 was Larry. Larry, who had not exposed her at the Sherwoods', and whose influence had caused Hunt also not to expose her—Larry, who without deception56 was on a familiar footing at the Sherwoods' where she had been received only through trickery—Larry, a fugitive57 in danger from so many enemies, perhaps after all undeserved enemies—Larry, who looked to be making good on his boast to achieve success through honesty—Larry, who had again told her that he loved her. She liked Dick Sherwood—she really did. But Larry—that was something different.
And thus she thought on, drawn58 this way and that, and unable to reach a decision. But with most people, when in a state of acute mental turmoil59, that which has been most definite in the past, instinct, habit of mind, purpose, tradition, becomes at least temporarily the dominant60 factor through the mere61 circumstance that it has existed powerfully before, through its comparative stability, through its semi-permanence. And so with Maggie. She had for that one afternoon almost been won over against herself by the workings of Larry's secret diplomacy. Then had come the natural reaction. And now in her turmoil, in so far as she had any decision, it was instinctively62 to go right ahead in the direction in which she had been going.
But on the sixth day of her uncertainty63, just after Dick had called on her and she had provisionally accepted an invitation to Cedar Crest for the following afternoon, a danger which she had half seen from the start burst upon her without a moment's warning. It came into her sitting-room, just before her dinner hour, in the dual64 form of Barney and Old Jimmie. The faces of both were lowering.
“Get rid of that boob chaperon of yours!” gritted65 Barney. “We're going to have some real talk!”
Maggie stepped to the connecting door, sent Miss Grierson on an inconsequential errand, and returned.
“You're looking as pleasant as if you were sitting for a new photograph, Barney. What gives you that sweet expression?”
“You'll cut out your comic-supplement stuff in just one second,” Barney warned her. “We both saw young Sherwood awhile ago as he was leaving the Grantham, and he told us everything!”
Persiflage66 did indeed fail Maggie. “Everything?” she exclaimed. “What's everything?”
“He told us about proposing to you almost a week ago, and about your refusing him. And you lied to us—kept us sitting round, wasting our time—and all the while you've been double-crossing us!”
Those visitors from South and West, especially the women, who a few nights before on the roof had regarded Barney as the perfect courtier, would not have so esteemed67 him if they had seen him at the present moment. He seized Maggie's wrists, and all the evil of his violent nature glared from his small bright eyes.
“Damn you!” he cried. “Jimmie, she's yours, and a father's got a right to do anything he likes to his own daughter. Give it to her proper if she don't come across with the truth!”
Jimmie stepped closer to her and bared his yellow teeth. “I haven't given you a basting68 since you were fifteen—but I'll paste you one right in the mouth if you don't talk straight talk!”
“You hear that!” Barney gritted at her. He believed there was justice in his wrath—as indeed there was, of a sort. “Think what Jimmie and I've put into this, in time and hard coin! We've given you your chance, we've made you! And then, after hard work and waiting and our spending so much, and everything comes out exactly as we figured, you go and throw us down—not just yourself, but us and our rights! Now you talk straight stuff! Tell us, why did you refuse Sherwood when he proposed? And why did you tell me that lie about his not proposing?”
Maggie realized she was in a desperate plight69, with these two inflamed70 gazes upon her. Never had she felt so little of a daughter's liking71 for Old Jimmie as now when she looked into his lean, harsh, yellow-fanged face. And she had no illusions about Barney. He might love her, as she knew he did; but that would not be a check upon his ruthlessness if he thought himself balked72 or betrayed.
Just then her telephone began to ring. She started to move toward it, but Barney's grip checked her short.
“You're going to answer me—not any damned telephone! Let it ring!”
The bell rang for a minute or two before it stilled its shrill73 clamor. Its ringing was in a way a brief respite74 to Maggie, for it gave her additional time to consider what should be her course. She realized that she dared not let Barney believe at this moment that she had turned against him. Again she fell back upon her cool, self-confident manner.
“You want to know why? The answer is simple enough. I thought I might try out an improvement of our plan—something that might suit me better.”
“What's that?” Barney harshly demanded.
“Since Miss Sherwood fell for me so easy, it struck me that she'd be pretty sure to fall for me if I told her the whole truth about myself. That is, everything except our scheme to play Dick for a sucker.”
“What're you driving at?”
“Don't you see? If she forgave me being what I am, and I rather think she would, and with Dick liking me as he does—why, it struck me as the best thing for yours truly to marry Dick for keeps.”
“What?” Though Barney's voice was low, it had the effect of a startled and savage75 roar. “And chuck us over-board?”
“Not at all. If I married Dick for keeps, I intended to pay you a lump sum, or else a regular amount each year.”
“No, you don't!” Barney cried in the same muffled76 roar.
“Perhaps not—I haven't decided,” Maggie said evenly. “I've merely been telling you, as you requested me, why I did as I did. I refused Dick, and lied to you, so that I might have more time to think over what I really wanted to do.”
Instinctively she had counted on rousing Barney's jealousy77 in order to throw him off the track of her real thoughts. She succeeded.
“I can tell you what you're going to do!” Barney flung at her with fierce mastery. “You're not going to put over a sure-enough marriage with any Dick Sherwood! When there's that kind of a marriage, I'm going to be the man! And you're going to go right straight ahead with our old plan! Dick'll propose again if you give him half a chance. And when he does, you say 'yes'! Understand? That's what you're going to do!”
There was no safety in openly defying Barney. And as a matter of fact what he had ordered was what, in the shifting currents of her thoughts, the steady momentum of her old ambitions and purposes had been pushing her toward. So she said, in her even voice:
“You waste such a lot of your good energy, Barney, by exploding when there's nothing to blow up. That's exactly what I'd decided to do. Miss Sherwood has asked me out to Cedar Crest to-morrow afternoon, and I'm going.”
Barney let go the hold he had kept upon her wrists, and the dark look slowly lifted from his face. “Why didn't you tell a fellow this at first?” he half grumbled78. Then with a grim enthusiasm: “And when you come back, you're going to tell us it's all settled!”
“Of course—if he asks me. And now suppose you two go away. You've given me a headache, and I want to rest.”
“We'll go,” said Barney. “But there may be some more points about this that we may want to talk over a little later to-night. So better get all the rest you can.”
But when they had gone and left her to the silence of her pretentious79 and characterless suite, Maggie did not rest. She had made up her mind; she was going to do as she had said. But there was still that same turmoil within her.
Again she thought of Larry. But she would not admit to herself that her real motive80 for suddenly deciding to go to Cedar Crest on the morrow was the chance of seeing him.
点击收听单词发音
1 cedar | |
n.雪松,香柏(木) | |
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2 crest | |
n.顶点;饰章;羽冠;vt.达到顶点;vi.形成浪尖 | |
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3 miraculously | |
ad.奇迹般地 | |
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4 chaos | |
n.混乱,无秩序 | |
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5 extremities | |
n.端点( extremity的名词复数 );尽头;手和足;极窘迫的境地 | |
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6 steered | |
v.驾驶( steer的过去式和过去分词 );操纵;控制;引导 | |
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7 machinery | |
n.(总称)机械,机器;机构 | |
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8 mighty | |
adj.强有力的;巨大的 | |
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9 plunged | |
v.颠簸( plunge的过去式和过去分词 );暴跌;骤降;突降 | |
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10 stammeringly | |
adv.stammering(口吃的)的变形 | |
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11 ardor | |
n.热情,狂热 | |
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12 vibrantly | |
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13 brace | |
n. 支柱,曲柄,大括号; v. 绷紧,顶住,(为困难或坏事)做准备 | |
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14 adroitly | |
adv.熟练地,敏捷地 | |
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15 torrent | |
n.激流,洪流;爆发,(话语等的)连发 | |
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16 imploring | |
恳求的,哀求的 | |
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17 impelled | |
v.推动、推进或敦促某人做某事( impel的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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18 confession | |
n.自白,供认,承认 | |
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19 impulsively | |
adv.冲动地 | |
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20 momentum | |
n.动力,冲力,势头;动量 | |
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21 realization | |
n.实现;认识到,深刻了解 | |
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22 obstruction | |
n.阻塞,堵塞;障碍物 | |
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23 frenzied | |
a.激怒的;疯狂的 | |
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24 cynical | |
adj.(对人性或动机)怀疑的,不信世道向善的 | |
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25 accusation | |
n.控告,指责,谴责 | |
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26 doggedly | |
adv.顽强地,固执地 | |
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27 lackeys | |
n.听差( lackey的名词复数 );男仆(通常穿制服);卑躬屈膝的人;被待为奴仆的人 | |
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28 sitting-room | |
n.(BrE)客厅,起居室 | |
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29 suite | |
n.一套(家具);套房;随从人员 | |
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30 legitimately | |
ad.合法地;正当地,合理地 | |
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31 impatience | |
n.不耐烦,急躁 | |
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32 swell | |
vi.膨胀,肿胀;增长,增强 | |
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33 admiration | |
n.钦佩,赞美,羡慕 | |
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34 exulted | |
狂喜,欢跃( exult的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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35 bracing | |
adj.令人振奋的 | |
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36 steadily | |
adv.稳定地;不变地;持续地 | |
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37 decided | |
adj.决定了的,坚决的;明显的,明确的 | |
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38 shrugged | |
vt.耸肩(shrug的过去式与过去分词形式) | |
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39 suave | |
adj.温和的;柔和的;文雅的 | |
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40 diplomacy | |
n.外交;外交手腕,交际手腕 | |
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41 insinuated | |
v.暗示( insinuate的过去式和过去分词 );巧妙或迂回地潜入;(使)缓慢进入;慢慢伸入 | |
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42 devoted | |
adj.忠诚的,忠实的,热心的,献身于...的 | |
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43 interpretation | |
n.解释,说明,描述;艺术处理 | |
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44 gallantly | |
adv. 漂亮地,勇敢地,献殷勤地 | |
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45 gracefully | |
ad.大大方方地;优美地 | |
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46 hopped | |
跳上[下]( hop的过去式和过去分词 ); 单足蹦跳; 齐足(或双足)跳行; 摘葎草花 | |
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47 perversion | |
n.曲解;堕落;反常 | |
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48 beholding | |
v.看,注视( behold的现在分词 );瞧;看呀;(叙述中用于引出某人意外的出现)哎哟 | |
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49 distinguished | |
adj.卓越的,杰出的,著名的 | |
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50 specimens | |
n.样品( specimen的名词复数 );范例;(化验的)抽样;某种类型的人 | |
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51 dilemmas | |
n.左右为难( dilemma的名词复数 );窘境,困境 | |
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52 immediate | |
adj.立即的;直接的,最接近的;紧靠的 | |
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53 ferment | |
vt.使发酵;n./vt.(使)激动,(使)动乱 | |
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54 germinate | |
v.发芽;发生;发展 | |
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55 meditations | |
默想( meditation的名词复数 ); 默念; 沉思; 冥想 | |
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56 deception | |
n.欺骗,欺诈;骗局,诡计 | |
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57 fugitive | |
adj.逃亡的,易逝的;n.逃犯,逃亡者 | |
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58 drawn | |
v.拖,拉,拔出;adj.憔悴的,紧张的 | |
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59 turmoil | |
n.骚乱,混乱,动乱 | |
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60 dominant | |
adj.支配的,统治的;占优势的;显性的;n.主因,要素,主要的人(或物);显性基因 | |
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61 mere | |
adj.纯粹的;仅仅,只不过 | |
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62 instinctively | |
adv.本能地 | |
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63 uncertainty | |
n.易变,靠不住,不确知,不确定的事物 | |
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64 dual | |
adj.双的;二重的,二元的 | |
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65 gritted | |
v.以沙砾覆盖(某物),撒沙砾于( grit的过去式和过去分词 );咬紧牙关 | |
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66 persiflage | |
n.戏弄;挖苦 | |
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67 esteemed | |
adj.受人尊敬的v.尊敬( esteem的过去式和过去分词 );敬重;认为;以为 | |
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68 basting | |
n.疏缝;疏缝的针脚;疏缝用线;涂油v.打( baste的现在分词 );粗缝;痛斥;(烤肉等时)往上抹[浇]油 | |
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69 plight | |
n.困境,境况,誓约,艰难;vt.宣誓,保证,约定 | |
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70 inflamed | |
adj.发炎的,红肿的v.(使)变红,发怒,过热( inflame的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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71 liking | |
n.爱好;嗜好;喜欢 | |
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72 balked | |
v.畏缩不前,犹豫( balk的过去式和过去分词 );(指马)不肯跑 | |
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73 shrill | |
adj.尖声的;刺耳的;v尖叫 | |
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74 respite | |
n.休息,中止,暂缓 | |
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75 savage | |
adj.野蛮的;凶恶的,残暴的;n.未开化的人 | |
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76 muffled | |
adj.(声音)被隔的;听不太清的;(衣服)裹严的;蒙住的v.压抑,捂住( muffle的过去式和过去分词 );用厚厚的衣帽包着(自己) | |
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77 jealousy | |
n.妒忌,嫉妒,猜忌 | |
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78 grumbled | |
抱怨( grumble的过去式和过去分词 ); 发牢骚; 咕哝; 发哼声 | |
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79 pretentious | |
adj.自命不凡的,自负的,炫耀的 | |
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80 motive | |
n.动机,目的;adv.发动的,运动的 | |
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