Chapter XV — An Old Convert to Phrenology

 About eleven o'clock the steamer stopped. A dense¹ fog had sprung up, which made it perilous² to proceed. Ben, who was a novice³ in traveling, got up to see what was the matter. He was on his way back to the stateroom, when he encountered a strange figure. The old lady was wandering about in dishabille, looking thoroughly⁴ alarmed.

 

Recognizing Ben, she clutched his arm.

 

"What has happened?" she asked, in a hollow voice, "Is the ship sinkin'?"

 

"No, ma'am," answered Ben. "We have only stopped on account of the fog."

 

"Something may run into us," exclaimed the old lady. "Oh, dear! I wish I had never left home."

 

"You'd better go back to bed," said Ben soothingly⁵. "There's no danger."

 

"No, I won't," said the old woman resolutely⁶. "I'm not going to be drowned in my bed. I'll stay here till mornin'."

 

And she plumped down into an armchair, where she looked like an image of despair.

 

"Hadn't you better put on something more?" suggested Ben. "You may get cold."

 

"I'll put on my shawl and bunnit," said the old lady. "I can't sleep a wink⁷. We shall be shipwrecked; I know we shall."

 

Whether the old lady kept her word, or not, Ben did not know. When he entered the saloon the next morning she was already up and dressed, looking haggard from want of sleep. Ben ascertained⁸ that the boat had started again about five o'clock, and would probably reach Fall River five or six hours late. This would make it necessary to take breakfast on board.

 

He imparted the news to the old lady.

 

"It's a shame," she said indignantly. "They did it a purpose to make us spend more money. I expected to eat breakfast at my son's house in Boston."

 

"We shall not probably reach Boston till noon, I hear."

 

"Then suppose I'll have to buy somethin' to stay my stomach. It's a shame. It costs a sight to travel."

 

"So it does," acquiesced⁹ Ben.

 

"They'd oughter give us our breakfast."

 

"I'm afraid they won't see it in that light."

 

The old lady went down to breakfast, and grudgingly¹⁰ paid out twenty cents more for tea and toast. She was in hopes Ben would get some meat and offer her a portion; but he, too, felt the necessity of being economical, and ordered something less expensive.

 

Prof. Crane attempted to renew his phrenological examinations, but could only obtain two subjects.

 

"Shan't I examine your head?' he asked insinuatingly¹¹ of the old lady.

 

"No, you shan't," she answered tartly¹². "I don't want you pawing over me."

 

"Don't you want me to describe your character?"

 

"No, I don't. Like as not, you'd slander¹³ me."

 

"Oh, no, ma'am; I should only indicate, by an examination of your bumps, your various tendencies and proclivities¹⁴."

 

"I don't believe I've got any bumps."

 

"Oh, yes, you have. We all have them. I shall only ask you twenty-five cents for an examination."

 

"I won't give it," said the old lady, resolutely clutching her purse, as if she feared a violent effort to dispossess her of it. "I can't afford it."

 

"It is a very small sum to pay for the knowledge of yourself."

 

"I guess I know myself better than you do," said the old lady, nodding her head vigorously. Then, yielding to an impulse of curiosity: "Say, mister, is it a pretty good business, examinin' heads?"

 

"It ought to be," answered the professor, "if the world were thoroughly alive to the importance of the noble science of phrenology."

 

"I don't see what use it is."

 

"Let me tell you, then, ma'am. You have doubtless employed servants that proved unworthy of your confidence."

 

The old lady assented¹⁵.

 

"Now if you had employed a phrenologist to examine a servant's head before engaging her, he would have told you at once whether she was likely to prove honest and faithful, or the reverse."

 

"You don't say!" exclaimed the old lady, beginning to be impressed. "Well, that would be something, I declare. Now, there's Mirandy Jones, used to work for me—I'm almost certain she stole one of my best caps."

 

"To wear herself?" asked Ben demurely¹⁶.

 

"No, she wanted it for her grandmother. I'm almost sure I saw it on the old woman's head at the sewin' circle one afternoon. Then, again, there was Susan Thompson. She was the laziest, sleepiest gal¹⁷ I ever see. Why, one day I went into the kitchen, and what do you think? There she stood, in the middle of the floor, leanin' her head over her broom fast asleep."

 

"In both these cases phrenology would have enabled you to understand their deficiencies, and saved you from hiring them."

 

Here a gentlemen whispered to Prof. Crane: "Offer to examine the old woman's head for nothing. I will see you are paid."

 

The professor was not slow in taking the hint.

 

"Madam," said he, "as my time just now isn't particularly valuable, I don't mind examining your head for nothing."

 

"Will you?" said the old lady. "Well, you're very polite and oblegin'. You may, if you want to."

 

Prof. Crane understood that a joke was intended, and shaped his remarks accordingly.

 

"This lady," he commenced, "is distinguished¹⁸ for her amiable¹⁹ disposition²⁰." Here there was a smile visible on several faces, which, luckily, the old lady didn't see. "At the same time, she is always ready to stand up for her rights, and will not submit to be imposed upon."

 

"You're right there, mister," interjected the old lady, "as my son-in-law will testify. He tried to put upon me; but I soon let him know that I knew what was right, and meant to have it.

 

"My subject has a good taste for music, and would have been a superior performer if her talent had been cultivated. But her practical views would hardly have permitted her to spend much time in what is merely ornamental²¹. She is a good housekeeper²², and I may venture to remark that she understands cooking thoroughly."

 

The old lady—so potent²³ is flattery—really began to look amiable.

 

"I wish old Miss Smith could hear you," she interrupted. "She's a vain, conceited²⁴ critter, and purtends she can cook better than I can. If I couldn't make better pies that she had the last time the sewin' circle met at her house, I'd give up cookin', that's all."

 

"You see, gentlemen and ladies," said the professor, looking about him gravely, "how correct are the inductions²⁵ of science. All that I have said thus far has been confirmed by my subject, who surely ought to know whether I am correct or not."

 

"This lady," he proceeded, "is fitted to shine in society.  Her social

 sphere may have been limited by circumstances; but had her lot

been cast in the shining circles of fashion, her natural grace and

refinement²⁶ would have enabled her to embellish²⁷ any position to

which she might have been called."

The contrast between the old lady's appearance and the words of Prof. Crane was so ludicrous that Ben and several others with difficulty, kept their countenances²⁸. But the old lady listened with great complacency.

 

"I wish my granddarter would hear you," she said. "She's a pert little thing, that thinks she knows more than her grandmother. I've often told my darter she ought to be more strict with her; but it don't do no good."

 

"It's the way with the young, madam. They cannot appreciate the sterling²⁹ qualities of their elders."

 

When the examination was concluded, the old lady expressed her faith in phrenology.

 

"I never did believe in't before," she admitted, "but the man described me just as if he know'd me all my life. Railly, it's wonderful."

 

Prof. Crane got his money, and with it the favor of the old lady to whom he had given such a first-class character. Her only regret was that her friends at home could not have heard him.

 

About one o'clock in the afternoon the long journey was at an end, and Ben and his young charge descended³⁰ from the train in the South Terminal, in Boston.

1 dense   

a.密集的，稠密的，浓密的；密度大的

参考例句：

• The general ambushed his troops in the dense woods. 将军把部队埋伏在浓密的树林里。
• The path was completely covered by the dense foliage. 小路被树叶厚厚地盖了一层。

2 perilous   

adj.危险的，冒险的

参考例句：

• The journey through the jungle was perilous.穿过丛林的旅行充满了危险。
• We have been carried in safety through a perilous crisis.历经一连串危机，我们如今已安然无恙。

3 novice   

adj.新手的，生手的

参考例句：

• As a novice writer,this is something I'm interested in.作为初涉写作的人，我对此很感兴趣。
• She realized that she was a novice.她知道自己初出茅庐。

4 thoroughly   

adv.完全地，彻底地，十足地

参考例句：

• The soil must be thoroughly turned over before planting.一定要先把土地深翻一遍再下种。
• The soldiers have been thoroughly instructed in the care of their weapons.士兵们都系统地接受过保护武器的训练。

5 soothingly   

adv.抚慰地，安慰地；镇痛地

参考例句：

• The mother talked soothingly to her child. 母亲对自己的孩子安慰地说。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• He continued to talk quietly and soothingly to the girl until her frightened grip on his arm was relaxed. 他继续柔声安慰那姑娘，她那因恐惧而紧抓住他的手终于放松了。 来自《简明英汉词典》

6 resolutely   

adj.坚决地，果断地

参考例句：

• He resolutely adhered to what he had said at the meeting. 他坚持他在会上所说的话。
• He grumbles at his lot instead of resolutely facing his difficulties. 他不是果敢地去面对困难，而是抱怨自己运气不佳。

7 wink   

n.眨眼，使眼色，瞬间；v.眨眼，使眼色，闪烁

参考例句：

• He tipped me the wink not to buy at that price.他眨眼暗示我按那个价格就不要买。
• The satellite disappeared in a wink.瞬息之间，那颗卫星就消失了。

8 ascertained   

v.弄清，确定，查明( ascertain的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• The previously unidentified objects have now been definitely ascertained as being satellites. 原来所说的不明飞行物现在已证实是卫星。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• I ascertained that she was dead. 我断定她已经死了。 来自《简明英汉词典》

9 acquiesced   

v.默认，默许( acquiesce的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• Senior government figures must have acquiesced in the cover-up. 政府高级官员必然已经默许掩盖真相。
• After a lot of persuasion,he finally acquiesced. 经过多次劝说，他最终默许了。 来自《简明英汉词典》

10 grudgingly   

参考例句：

• He grudgingly acknowledged having made a mistake. 他勉强承认他做错了。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Their parents unwillingly [grudgingly] consented to the marriage. 他们的父母无可奈何地应允了这门亲事。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》

11 insinuatingly   

参考例句：

• Corell said insinuatingly,"Are you afraid, Colonel?" 科雷尔很婉转地说：“你害怕了吗，上校？” 来自辞典例句

12 tartly   

adv.辛辣地，刻薄地

参考例句：

• She finished by tartly pointing out that he owed her some money. 她最后刻薄地指出他欠她一些钱。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Kay said tartly, "And you're more Yankee than Italian. 恺酸溜溜他说：“可你哪，与其说是意大利人，还不如说是新英格兰人。 来自教父部分

13 slander   

n./v.诽谤，污蔑

参考例句：

• The article is a slander on ordinary working people.那篇文章是对普通劳动大众的诋毁。
• He threatened to go public with the slander.他威胁要把丑闻宣扬出去。

14 proclivities   

n.倾向，癖性( proclivity的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• Raised by adoptive parents,Hill received early encouragement in her musical proclivities. 希尔由养父母带大，从小，她的音乐爱好就受到了鼓励。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Whatever his political connections and proclivities, he did not care to neglect so powerful a man. 无论他的政治关系和脾气如何，他并不愿怠慢这样有势力的人。 来自辞典例句

15 assented   

同意，赞成( assent的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• The judge assented to allow the prisoner to speak. 法官同意允许犯人申辩。
• "No," assented Tom, "they don't kill the women -- they're too noble. “对，”汤姆表示赞同地说，“他们不杀女人——真伟大！

16 demurely   

adv.装成端庄地，认真地

参考例句：

• "On the forehead, like a good brother,'she answered demurely. "吻前额，像个好哥哥那样，"她故作正经地回答说。 来自飘（部分）
• Punctuation is the way one bats one's eyes, lowers one's voice or blushes demurely. 标点就像人眨眨眼睛，低声细语，或伍犯作态。 来自名作英译部分

17 gal   

n.姑娘，少女

参考例句：

• We decided to go with the gal from Merrill.我们决定和那个从梅里尔来的女孩合作。
• What's the name of the gal? 这个妞叫什么？

18 distinguished   

adj.卓越的，杰出的，著名的

参考例句：

• Elephants are distinguished from other animals by their long noses.大象以其长长的鼻子显示出与其他动物的不同。
• A banquet was given in honor of the distinguished guests.宴会是为了向贵宾们致敬而举行的。

19 amiable   

adj.和蔼可亲的，友善的，亲切的

参考例句：

• She was a very kind and amiable old woman.她是个善良和气的老太太。
• We have a very amiable companionship.我们之间存在一种友好的关系。

20 disposition   

n.性情，性格；意向，倾向；排列，部署

参考例句：

• He has made a good disposition of his property.他已对财产作了妥善处理。
• He has a cheerful disposition.他性情开朗。

21 ornamental   

adj.装饰的；作装饰用的；n.装饰品；观赏植物

参考例句：

• The stream was dammed up to form ornamental lakes.溪流用水坝拦挡起来,形成了装饰性的湖泊。
• The ornamental ironwork lends a touch of elegance to the house.铁艺饰件为房子略添雅致。

22 housekeeper   

n.管理家务的主妇，女管家

参考例句：

• A spotless stove told us that his mother is a diligent housekeeper.炉子清洁无瑕就表明他母亲是个勤劳的主妇。
• She is an economical housekeeper and feeds her family cheaply.她节约持家，一家人吃得很省。

23 potent   

adj.强有力的，有权势的；有效力的

参考例句：

• The medicine had a potent effect on your disease.这药物对你的病疗效很大。
• We must account of his potent influence.我们必须考虑他的强有力的影响。

24 conceited   

adj.自负的，骄傲自满的

参考例句：

• He could not bear that they should be so conceited.他们这样自高自大他受不了。
• I'm not as conceited as so many people seem to think.我不像很多人认为的那么自负。

25 inductions   

归纳（法）( induction的名词复数 )； （电或磁的）感应； 就职； 吸入

参考例句：

26 refinement   

n.文雅；高尚；精美；精制；精炼

参考例句：

• Sally is a woman of great refinement and beauty. 莎莉是个温文尔雅又很漂亮的女士。
• Good manners and correct speech are marks of refinement.彬彬有礼和谈吐得体是文雅的标志。

27 embellish   

v.装饰，布置；给…添加细节，润饰

参考例句：

• I asked him not to embellish the truth with ideas of his own.我要他不对事实添油加醋。
• Can you embellish your refusal just a little bit?你可以对你的婉拒之辞略加修饰吗？

28 countenances   

n.面容( countenance的名词复数 )；表情；镇静；道义支持

参考例句：

• 'stood apart, with countenances of inflexible gravity, beyond what even the Puritan aspect could attain." 站在一旁，他们脸上那种严肃刚毅的神情，比清教徒们还有过之而无不及。 来自英汉 - 翻译样例 - 文学
• The light of a laugh never came to brighten their sombre and wicked countenances. 欢乐的光芒从来未照亮过他们那阴郁邪恶的面孔。 来自辞典例句

29 sterling   

adj.英币的(纯粹的，货真价实的)；n.英国货币(英镑)

参考例句：

• Could you tell me the current rate for sterling, please?能否请您告诉我现行英国货币的兑换率？
• Sterling has recently been strong,which will help to abate inflationary pressures.英国货币最近非常坚挺，这有助于减轻通胀压力。

30 descended   

a.为...后裔的，出身于...的

参考例句：

• A mood of melancholy descended on us. 一种悲伤的情绪袭上我们的心头。
• The path descended the hill in a series of zigzags. 小路呈连续的之字形顺着山坡蜿蜒而下。