Alice acted somewhat the part of a jailer; she had to convey the disgraced girl to Middleton School.
"I am ill; I won't go," said Kitty, bursting into tears.
"You had much better come, Kitty," said Alice, speaking almost kindly3 for the first time in her life; she really pitied poor Kitty at that moment. "If you will only take your punishment patiently it will soon be over, and I know for a fact," she continued, "that many of the girls are only too anxious to make it up to you by and by."
"Oh, it's not that," said Kitty; "it is because I am so wretched. I have a great trouble at home; but there, there's no use in talking to you about it, Alice."
"So you always say," answered Alice. "Whenever I want to be the least bit good to you, you put me off; but never mind, I am sure I can do without your friendship. Anyhow, I think you must come to school unless you are so ill that mother will be obliged to send for the doctor."
"Oh, I don't want that," said Kitty, "I never had a doctor in my life.
If you'll wait for me, Alice, I'll go upstairs and put on my hat."
She rushed to her room, flung herself on her knees for a moment by her bedside, and uttered a frantic4 prayer to Heaven.
"Oh! God, in your mercy, keep Laurie from doing anything desperate," cried the unhappy girl. She then joined Alice downstairs. Her face was white; there were heavy black lines under her eyes; she had never looked prettier, more pathetic, more likely to win sympathy from the other girls.
At prayers that morning all eyes were directed to Kitty Malone. She was not allowed to sit with the others, but was given, a place on the bench with the teachers. Here she faced the rest of the school. It would have been a cruel position for another girl; but it did not matter to Kitty, for she saw no one present. Her eyes, with that queer inward look in them, were gazing straight, not at the scene before her, but at the old home in Ireland. The squire5, whom she so passionately7 loved, roused to the last extremity8 of anger; the boy, whose heart was hers, crushed, trapped, imprisoned9, his liberty taken from him. Kitty trembled from head to foot; she could scarcely restrain her terrible emotion.
After school she accompanied the others to the classroom, but in absolute silence. She was given her usual lessons to do, but at a table by herself. Her punishment was to be carried out in all its fullness; but, dreadful as it would seem to most, it did not touch her at all to-day. Her head ached, her eyes felt dim. Laurie's telegram, which lay in her pocket, seemed to scorch10 into the very depths of her heart. She had not even been allowed to answer it; the whole weight of her trouble lay unrelieved upon her. The poor child was unaccustomed to such anguish11, and her self-control was in danger moment by moment of giving way.
As she strove to get that dull piece of English history into her head, as she endeavored to follow the rules of syntax, as the knowledge that she never, never to the longest day of her life, would understand what was meant by the possessive case, alongside with these feeble little efforts to follow her lessons, ran the dark thought of how, by what possible means, she could help Laurie. And more and more as the time went on she felt that she could not keep her promise to Elma. Elma had been cruel to her; she had borrowed her money when she knew she had not the most remote chance of paying it back; she had spent it according to her own saying in the most frivolous12 way. Now, for the first time, Kitty learned to despise dress. How could Elma spend the money which was to save Laurie in anything so contemptible13 as ribbons and finery? Kitty looked down at her own neatly-appointed clothes; her perfect little shoes peeped out from beneath the frill of her dress. Notwithstanding her misery15 she was as neat as usual in her attire16; but now she had no heart to appreciate gay clothes, good looks, pretty ribbons—any of the things which usually delighted her. Laurie seemed to cry to her; she fancied she could hear his voice coming across the waters to her ears—Laurie, who had always trusted to her, who, strong as he was, was not quite so strong as Kitty when scrapes and troubles were about. Oh! if only she could go to him! If only she might relieve her feelings and tell the exact truth to Miss Sherrard! What kept her back? Nothing whatever but the thought of Elma. She had given Elma a promise, and, tempted17 as she was, she must not break it.
As this thought came to her she remembered that she had only promised Elma to keep the secret until after morning school. That time would soon be up.
"Once Miss Sherrard knows I am certain she will help me," thought Kitty, "though I don't want to excuse myself; yet I know that a great deal of the blame of my proceedings18 will be lifted from my shoulders to Elma's. Why should I go through all the suffering, and Elma sit there looking so calm, and quiet, and still?"
As these thoughts rushed through Kitty's mind she glanced up for the first time, and calmly surveyed the great room full of her fellow-students. As if with one impulse all the girls raised their eyes and looked back at her. There was pity on most of the faces, amusement on a few, curiosity on a few others; but on Elma's face alone was an expression of intense anxiety and misery. Kitty had the kindest heart in the world. The moment she saw this expression the idea of betraying Elma melted from her mind.
"She does look wretched," she said to herself. "I must not speak to her; I dare not, and yet—yet—I should like her to know that I am not going to be hard on her."
Kitty tore off a piece of her exercise book and managed, when she thought no one would see, to write a little note to Elma. In this she said, "Don't be afraid, Elma; I have made up my mind not to tell."
This note she twisted up, and, as the girls were going to the playground for recess19, managed to flash an intelligent glance toward Elma. Elma approached close to her table, Kitty stretched out her hand, and Elma's fingers were just about to close over the note, when, by an unlucky chance, there came a breeze through the window, and the note, for some inconceivable reason, fluttered from Kitty's hand to the floor. In an instant Miss Worrick had seen it. She was just stepping forward when Elma like a flash caught it up and tore it into fragments. She would not for the world have the note seen. Miss Worrick, filled with anger, came up to Kitty.
"You are a bad girl, the worst girl I know," she said. "You are not even honorable. Did you not give your parole that you would not hold communication with another girl in the school, and yet you have been trying to communicate with Elma Lewis by means of writing?"
"Writing is not speaking," said Kitty, now standing14 up very erect20 and proud, and replying to Miss Worrick as pertly as she could.
"Don't answer me, miss; you grow worse and worse. Elma Lewis, do you know anything about that note?"
Kitty looked full at Elma. If she was going to be true to Elma, would
Elma be equally true to her?"
"I know nothing about it," said Elma promptly21.
Kitty's eyes filled with withering22 scorn; an expression of disdain23 curled her pretty lips.
"You are quite certain, Elma? Kitty Malone seems to have a great anxiety to communicate with you. Can you throw any light on the scrape she has got into?"
"I know nothing whatever about her secrets; I—I have nothing to do with them," said Elma in an agitated24 voice, which she endeavored in vain to render calm.
Gwin Harley, who had stopped on her way out of the classroom, paused to listen to Elma's words.
Kitty's face was now white as death. She did not glance at Elma; she was looking the other way.
"Leave us, girls," said Miss Worrick.
The next moment the great classroom was empty, with the exception of
Miss Worrick and Kitty Malone. Kitty was standing upright as a dart25.
"Take me to Miss Sherrard; I want to speak to her," she said.
"I am certainly going to take you to her. You are a very, very wicked girl. I doubt not you will be expelled."
"Oh, I hope I shall," said Kitty. "I should like nothing in all the world better."
"You would? You are quite incorrigible26. Do you know, you wretched girl, what it means?"
"No," answered Kitty; "I wait for you to tell me. What does it mean,
Miss Worrick?"
"That you are tainted27 for life, disgraced for life. Wherever you go it will be always remembered to you that your conduct was so bad at school that you were obliged to be expelled."
"But that won't matter in old Ireland," said Kitty with a hollow, forced laugh.
"Yes, it will; it will break your father's heart. There are no people so proud as the Irish. They can stand a good deal; but any cloud on their honor——"
"Ah, you are right," cried Kitty, standing still, and a queer change coming over her face. "Our honor—no one ever touched that yet."
"It will have a nice blow when you are dismissed from Middleton School," said Miss Worrick, glad to find a point in Kitty's hitherto invulnerable armor. "Come with me at once, you bad girl. I must explain your conduct to Miss Sherrard."
"I have something on my own account to say to Miss Sherrard," answered
Kitty in a proud voice; "something which will explain a good deal."
"I am glad to hear it; but I scarcely think any words of yours can remove the stigma28 on your character. But come; I have no time to argue with you further."
Miss Worrick now led the way into Miss Sherrard's little sitting-room29. Miss Sherrard was standing near the window; she turned quickly when she saw Miss Worrick, and a displeased30 and withal a troubled glance filled her eyes as they rested upon Kitty."
"Anything fresh?" she said, turning to the teacher with a weary expression in her voice.
"Only just what I expected," said Miss Worrick with bitterness. "Kitty
Malone is not to be trusted. Yesterday she gave her word of honor——"
"I didn't," interrupted Kitty.
"Kitty my dear, allow your teacher to speak."
"She gave her word of honor, or equivalent to it, that she would submit to the punishment which you rightly inflicted31 upon her. Well, I found her just now in the act of smuggling32 a note into Elma Lewis' hand."
"Oh, but this is very bad, Kitty," said Miss Sherrard. "Did you not know what your word of honor meant?"
"I never promised anything," replied Kitty. "You spoke33; but I was silent."
"Pardon me, my dear; that is begging the question. You were told that you were not to communicate with any of your fellow-pupils. Your silence signified consent. Kitty, I am ashamed of you."
"As you know so much you may as well know all," said Kitty, desperation in her tone. "I did far worse than you think. Last night I went out again after dark by myself to see Elma Lewis. I had an interview with her. I talked to her, and she talked to me. That was not exactly her fault; for I forced her to speak. Now, you know how very bad I am. Expel me if you wish. I know you will after this. I am in dreadful disgrace. I only wish I were dead."
"Leave us, Miss Worrick," said Miss Sherrard.
The door was closed behind the governess; and the head-mistress, taking one of Kitty's cold hands, led her to a seat near herself on the sofa.
"There is more behind," she said. "Kitty, you must tell me the truth."
"I long to tell you," answered Kitty. "A short time back I had made up my mind to conceal34 it because the telling would make another girl miserable—miserable for life. Now my feelings are changed."
"I am glad that you are at last willing to confide35 in me," said Miss Sherrard in a kinder tone. "Tell me everything, Kitty, and as quickly as you can."
Thus counseled, Kitty's reserve absolutely gave way. The whole miserable story was quickly revealed: Elma Lewis' request for money; Kitty's generous response; Laurie's passionate6 and anguished36 letter; Kitty's desire to help him; her reasons, which had almost driven her mad, for seeking Elma; her desperate resolve at last to go to her late at night; then Elma's passionate beseeching37 of her to keep the secret; Kitty's promise that she would do so until after morning school that day; then her further resolve, when she saw the look of misery on Elma's face, to keep it altogether even at the cost of breaking Laurie's heart; then Elma's conduct when the note was discovered.
"I scorn her now," said Kitty. "I don't regard any promise I ever made to her. I am glad to tell. She is false, cowardly, and I scorn her. Miss Sherrard, you know everything; expel me if you must."
"Yes, I know everything," replied Miss Sherrard. She sat still for a few moments, lost in anxious thought. She blamed Kitty still, but she also deeply pitied her. Her feelings toward Elma were so strong that she could scarcely trust herself to speak of them at the present moment.
"My honor is gone, and my heart is broken," continued Kitty. "Of course you will expel me after this; and, indeed, I want to go home. Please, Miss Sherrard, let me go home; I cannot stay any longer at school."
"My dear Kitty," said Miss Sherrard, "I am very sorry for you. I am certainly glad at last to know the truth. You, poor child, have been more sinned against than sinning. I cannot tell you what I think about Elma. Such a girl does more mischief38 in a school than twenty like you. Stay, my dear; stop crying. Kitty, Kitty, what is it?"
"I feel nearly mad—Laurie is in such trouble. May I not at least answer his telegram?"
"Yes, here is a telegraph form. Fill in what you like; I will send it at once to the post office."
"Miss Sherrard, would it be possible for you to lend me the money?"
Miss Sherrard shook her head.
"I could not do it, Kitty; nor would it be right. Your brother has done distinctly wrong; and if you telegraph to him now I hope you will counsel him to go straight to your father and confess everything. There is never the least use in concealment39 where wrong-doing is concerned, my dear."
But Kitty's eyes had now blazed again with renewed passion.
"You are not a Malone nor an Irishwoman," she cried. "You do not know Ireland, or you would not speak in that tone. I counsel Laurie to tell father what he did to poor Paddy Wheel-about! I counsel him to say that he took the old man's coat—stole it from him! Miss Sherrard, you don't know father. Laurie did it, it is true, in a fit of bravado40; but father would never understand. He would be furious, wild; Le would punish him severely41. Oh, I must get that money somehow, in some fashion!"
"Kitty, you are speaking disrespectfully," said Miss Sherrard, "and I cannot allow it. I am sorry for you, my dear; you are dreadfully overcome at present. Go home now; I will see you again in the afternoon."
Poor Kitty left the room without even bidding her teacher good-by.
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1
soothe
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| v.安慰；使平静；使减轻；缓和；奉承 | |
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miserable
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| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
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kindly
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| adj.和蔼的，温和的，爽快的；adv.温和地，亲切地 | |
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frantic
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| adj.狂乱的，错乱的，激昂的 | |
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squire
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| n.护卫, 侍从, 乡绅 | |
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6
passionate
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| adj.热情的，热烈的，激昂的，易动情的，易怒的，性情暴躁的 | |
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7
passionately
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| ad.热烈地，激烈地 | |
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extremity
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| n.末端，尽头；尽力；终极；极度 | |
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9
imprisoned
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| 下狱，监禁( imprison的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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scorch
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| v.烧焦，烤焦；高速疾驶；n.烧焦处，焦痕 | |
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anguish
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| n.(尤指心灵上的)极度痛苦，烦恼 | |
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frivolous
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| adj.轻薄的；轻率的 | |
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contemptible
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| adj.可鄙的，可轻视的，卑劣的 | |
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14
standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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15
misery
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| n.痛苦，苦恼，苦难；悲惨的境遇，贫苦 | |
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16
attire
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| v.穿衣，装扮[同]array；n.衣着；盛装 | |
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17
tempted
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| v.怂恿（某人）干不正当的事；冒…的险（tempt的过去分词） | |
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18
proceedings
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| n.进程，过程，议程；诉讼(程序)；公报 | |
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19
recess
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| n.短期休息，壁凹（墙上装架子，柜子等凹处） | |
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20
erect
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| n./v.树立，建立，使竖立；adj.直立的，垂直的 | |
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21
promptly
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| adv.及时地，敏捷地 | |
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withering
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| 使人畏缩的，使人害羞的，使人难堪的 | |
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23
disdain
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| n.鄙视，轻视；v.轻视，鄙视，不屑 | |
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24
agitated
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| adj.被鼓动的，不安的 | |
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dart
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| v.猛冲，投掷；n.飞镖，猛冲 | |
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26
incorrigible
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| adj.难以纠正的，屡教不改的 | |
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27
tainted
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| adj.腐坏的；污染的；沾污的；感染的v.使变质( taint的过去式和过去分词 )；使污染；败坏；被污染，腐坏，败坏 | |
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28
stigma
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| n.耻辱，污名；(花的)柱头 | |
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29
sitting-room
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| n.（BrE）客厅，起居室 | |
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30
displeased
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| a.不快的 | |
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31
inflicted
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| 把…强加给，使承受，遭受( inflict的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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32
smuggling
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| n.走私 | |
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33
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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34
conceal
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| v.隐藏，隐瞒，隐蔽 | |
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35
confide
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| v.向某人吐露秘密 | |
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36
anguished
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| adj.极其痛苦的v.使极度痛苦(anguish的过去式) | |
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37
beseeching
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| adj.恳求似的v.恳求，乞求（某事物）( beseech的现在分词 ) | |
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38
mischief
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| n.损害，伤害，危害；恶作剧，捣蛋，胡闹 | |
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39
concealment
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| n.隐藏, 掩盖，隐瞒 | |
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40
bravado
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| n.虚张声势，故作勇敢，逞能 | |
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41
severely
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| adv.严格地；严厉地；非常恶劣地 | |
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